I will try to keep this short while still including details I think are relevant and important.

First some background, 2017-2019 I was at my lowest. Worst shape of my life (completely let myself go after once having a decent physique), wife hated me and never initiated sex, I was living 24/7 in her frame and thanking god she stayed with me. I had low/no self confidence, just a mess.

Late 2019 I had had enough, got back to the gym, quit drinking alcohol and eating garbage. Eventually got on TRT after discovering low T in a blood test.

Fast forward to now. I am in the best physical shape of my life. I’m 33 years old, 5’10, 212lbs at 13-14% bodyfat. 1RM on lifts are Bench: 385, Squat: 405 (weaker than I would like due a set back from groin injury), Deadlift: 500.

My issue and dilemma is this: now that I am in so much better shape, my wife is initiating sex with me quite often. I would say she actually initiates more than I do, we have sex probably 5 or 6 times a week. This is a great improvement compared to how things were a couple years ago. However, I am feeling unfulfilled in a couple areas. Basically she won’t give head, won’t do it doggystyle, won’t let me go down on her, obviously no anal. This began back when I was in my fat, drunken slob phase.

So I’m trying to figure this out. On the one hand I am having a lot of somewhat satisfying sex, but one the other hand it’s on her terms and I’m not getting everything I want.

I was thinking I could start rejecting her advances. Saying something like, “I don’t feel like it if you aren’t going to do it how I want”, these seems like it could backfire though.

I’ve tried being more assertive, like the other day we were fucking in the spoon position so I rolled her to prone and kept going. She wanted me to stop and got upset, I rolled back over in order to not ruin my opportunity to cum.

What do you all say?