Many nights just before I fall asleep, I have thoughts about how I just don’t feel like I’m there yet.

I don’t have the life I want yet. It’s just not ideal yet.

It’s like I can feel the wasted potential. What I could be like right now, what I imagine my ideal self and my ideal future to be like.

But in reality that’s not how it is.

It always seems to be just out of reach.

I’m always trying to improve myself and my life. Its hard. Much harder than i would have thought. You might absorb some amazing information but it’s the action you take that counts.

Im grateful for everything the TRP has taught me. Learning to be ahead of everyone else in a blue pill society.

I hope I can make it there one day. I hate picturing my ideal self and my ideal life - all that potential - only to then look back at the present moment to realise it’s nothing close to how I wished it was. Not yet.

Anyone else feel something similar?