How did I lose frame here?

halleluiaiaia9292 · 2021-02-23T14:50:17+00:00

One date. Oneitis.

As you say she is pretty and you threw all your standards for self-respect out the window.

At least be aware of it.

We all made same mistake

DerpJungler · 2021-02-23T15:17:23+00:00

You talk too much.

"Told her I won't chase her", "Told her I won't call" blah blah while doing all of these.

Show her you're high value, don't tell her. If you got game she will be the one texting you after the date for sure.

KCapoh · 2021-02-23T15:29:25+00:00

Your frame got lost somewhere in the sidebar. Go look for it.

Don_Draper27 · 2021-02-23T15:46:40+00:00

First of all don't ever consider someone LtR mAtErIaL until you've played for six months.

Getting oneitis for someone you didn't even kiss is really just a sad low budget Netflix film.

All that should matter is "can I escalate things with this girl to f-close?" Especially if she's moving out of town, push harder for a rejection.

"I like you" is such a wannabe boyfriend move. Did I bring up already that she's leaving town so all you can hope for is at least 1 f-close?

Cut all that talk. Next time, for date 2, invite her to meet up. That is all folks.

jverveslayer · 2021-02-23T16:54:23+00:00

It sounds like you haven't slept with her right?

If you did it in a really casual, lighthearted way this is fine, but the way you described it, I'm guessing bad move
No, you should have contacted her
Yes, this is bad. You never want to come off as trying to act cool/high value or try to tell other people you are cool/high value.
I don't know what happened on your date, so can't tell you that, but be more chill about the phone call. You should have just flirted/bantered then and asked her out again.

If she's about to move, then she isn't looking for a relationship. So you definitely should have gone for the pull on the first date

themostgianthorse · 2021-02-23T16:16:10+00:00

This is good because you failed hard and there is plenty to learn with no repercussions.

A) “She ticked all of my standards of a viable LTR”.

If you had read the sidebar and/or had much experience, you would know that this is extremely premature. This is a symptom of a scarcity mindset.

B) “She said she’s moving to another state”

Great! At this point, she is a potential plate. Nothing more. Your investment should be minimal.

C) “Picked up the phone and told her I liked her”

She already knows this. You have now communicated lower value by over investing too early.

D) “She said she’s moving and can’t start what she can’t finish”. “We plan on hanging out this weekend”

Notice that the words and actions (or intention of actions) conflict? Clearly she can start what she can’t “finish”. Actions over words.

E) “I told her I wasn’t calling anymore if she doesn’t”.

Why do you think she gives a shit? Again, you are communicating lower value to her. Ultimatums come from a position of powerlessness. This is especially true when you are interacting with women and on top of that, a NEW woman.

Secret_Twitch · 2021-02-23T15:19:50+00:00

You lost frame here because you are clearly a needy insecure simp who fell in love at the idea of a crumb of pussy from the "hottest chick I've been with in my life so far".

The girl is moving. She was probably looking to get her guts pushed in a couple of times if she could find a dude who won't act like a little bitch about it. She can't start what she can't finish. What you could have finished was squirting your load all over her tits and her face a couple of times before she moved away,

Title	How did I lose frame here?
Author	MonxtahDramux
Upvotes	0
Comments	28
Date	February 23, 2021 2:48 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/lqk2rx/how_did_i_lose_frame_here/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-did-i-lose-frame-here.746083 https://theredarchive.com/post/746083

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