How do I recognize and effectively deal with butthurt feelings?

juggernaut8 · 2018-03-16T13:59:55+00:00

You only ever get butthurt because your belief has been challenged. If whatever was said to you didn't challenge your belief you would feel nothing. E.g. if I were to shout 'you're a fucking lobster!' at you, it's likely you would feel nothing and think I was some crazy person. If I shouted 'you're a fucking idiot!' instead, you would most likely get angry at me. That's because the second remark challenged your belief about your intelligence. So identify those beliefs of yours that are often challenged and change them i.e. get a stronger frame.

vandaalen · 2018-03-16T11:34:04+00:00

stoicism

Whisper · 2018-03-16T16:05:50+00:00

When you are having a petty, insecure emotional reaction, the most important thing to do is nothing.

The reason that insecure people are detectable is that they are always trying to do stuff intended to make them feel better, instead of to effect a change in the world.

So what you do, when you spot the impulse is hold it in. Keep your mouth shut, and your hands still, and just fucking hold the line. Even if you feel like you're dying inside. Just keep that inside on the inside until it fades.

Then get back to working on yourself.

oldslut · 2018-03-16T11:55:53+00:00

if your internal frame was strong enough you wouldn't be butthurt. in the mean time, fake it and work on your frame.

Casd12 · 2018-03-16T21:55:49+00:00

How do you detect that you're feeling butthurt?

When you're angry at something, but cant dont anything without making you seem like a lil bitch.

What is the redpill way for dealing with it?

Personally, I analyze why Im butthurt and try to work out a solution to prevent that from happening. Example: A person beats me in a pullup competition, Im angry and butthurt that they won instead of me. I realize that im butthurt and then notice that the source of me getting butthurt is me losing at this pullup competition. Therefore my solution is to workout more.

Yonski3 · 2018-03-16T12:45:09+00:00

Stop blaming things outside of you to how you feel. you are responsible for your happiness and no one else.

chasebandz01 · 2018-03-16T17:51:07+00:00

setting and working towards goals and generally achieving success releases serotonin in your brain. this makes you more confident. you're butthurt because there's too much inertia in your life. If you have forms of momentum going any kind of slight setback that elicits butthurt is quickly swept under the rug.

Peter_B_Long · 2018-03-16T22:58:17+00:00

How do you detect that you're feeling butthurt?

You realize that you're butt hurt when you stop and fully understand that you're *reacting** based on emotion.*

What is the redpill way for dealing with it?

*TRP way of dealing with this kind of reaction towards others is to ~~act~~ BE indifferent. You're such a valuable and desirable man that if someone disappoints or doesn't value you, you'll cut them out in a way that you'll just be indifferent and treat them like how you would treat a younger cousin that nobody really likes but you still say hello and bye when they visit.

You don't completely ignore them, nor even show any kind of negative language. You basically treat them with no emotion. No excitement, no anger.

Mr_Badass · 2018-03-17T06:03:46+00:00

The most effective way is by mediating.

sign_of_reality · 2018-03-17T09:46:11+00:00

Here's my viewpoint. I'd drop the word 'butthurt' from your vocabulary and never, ever use that word again. Its a 12 year old boy's word.

You're hurt. Why are you hurt?

All human beings get hurt. Spending time alone with yourself and feeling your feelings is one way to deal with them. If you feel sad, feel sad, if you feel angry, feel angry. It may seem at first like this is not a cool thing, or its a waste of time, but actually, our feelings provide important clues to our deepest humanity. Many of the secrets of life come from feelings. These feelings, which can seem so useless, frustrating, or constraining - are actually a way to connect deeper with oneself, and with everyone else.

This isn't the redpill way, but its a good way.

VikkBlack · 2018-03-18T01:38:39+00:00

Be busy! Sometimes I get these days, Im butthurt constantly at someone, for me it helps to not focus on it but have fun and distract my mind. Being butthurt is pointless and you need a fresher mind.

TehJimmyy · 2018-03-16T16:14:03+00:00

Express it in a way that it relieves you but doesnt show up that much. Something like machiavellianism

Title	How do I recognize and effectively deal with butthurt feelings?
Author	pro-complainer
Upvotes	16
Comments	13
Date	March 16, 2018 10:50 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/84ujap/how_do_i_recognize_and_effectively_deal_with/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-do-i-recognize-and-effectively-deal-with.125857 https://theredarchive.com/post/125857

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