How to ACTUALLY stop hating yourself?

PemBayliss · 2015-10-03T19:34:19+00:00

Lift weights. Eliminate people from your life who drag you down.

youcantdenythat · 2015-10-03T19:49:51+00:00

I feel like I have to self-teach everything alone to myself about responsibility and everything I should have had been taught.

Yep. Welcome to adulthood.

Make sure the basics are covered. Are you eating right and getting good nutrition? Are you working out? Are you getting enough sleep?

If you can't/wont do those things, then stuff won't get better until you get sick enough that you do. And no one will give a rats ass about it except you.

Everyone has bad days. Maybe today is your bad day. Cry, mope around, sit on the computer all day, whatever.

But Tomorrow you need to get up early. Eat some cereal, drink some caffeine, and workout. Start with a fast walk and some pushups if thats all you can do.

Then take a shower, dress up nice, clean up your place, and do the rest of what you have to do. Get some vitamins and eat some damn salad with your meat for lunch. Eat fish too.

Talk to people whenever you can. You might be surprised at how easy it is and it will get easier the more you do it. Talk to old people, shy people, whatever. Go to meetup.com and find some group that interests you, especially outdoor activities.

Baby steps man. Baby steps. Get your life in order. You'll be glad you did!

Blerks · 2015-10-04T01:25:08+00:00

The way I stopped hating myself was to work towards having actual accomplishments I could use to convince myself that I have value. The trick is to set long-term goals, and figure out how you can work towards them in the short term. When I found myself making no progress on my thesis, I bribed myself with packs of magic cards to do at least SOME work each day.

If you're in college, join an activity club of some kind, preferably something physically active. Tell yourself it's okay to suck at first, and put in the effort to get better.

The biggest thing is to change your mindset, and the way you think about yourself. Don't think "I'm garbage, I'm useless." Try to think "I don't like the way I am now, but I won't always be like that."

iLLprincipLeS · 2015-10-03T19:37:07+00:00

I did horrible in school I never tried.

I'm scared people will hate me

but being told you're worthless and will be alone all your life how do you even begin to NOT be scared of how people see you?

?! why would that scare you? do nothing, you will be hated, do something, you will be hated. aren't you tired of this little game you play in your mind?

I don't want to be hated again.

being hated and bullied at my school

I don't want to be hated again.

you think will be bullied again if hated or what? is this some condition you learnt from the bullying in high school?

I feel broken and unfixable

who broke you? you can only broke yourself, and you can only fix yourself, outside influencing is just like bad weather, unless you are powerful and resourceful enough to own a device to control that then the only thing you can work with is yourself.

I lose motivation so often.

Is there anything I can do?

short story: nootropics + reading trp, step by step. it took you how many years to get in the hole you are currently in? it will take some time to climb out, it's not important how you will get out but WHO will get out.

RocketManV · 2015-10-03T19:17:31+00:00

Do you lift? Lift weights.

One thing that really helped was to "fall in love with myself," and this is how I define that. All those little things I wanted to love in another, I found in myself to love. Anything I could see myself loving in a partner, I was able to them enjoy in and for myself in the same way I wanted to work another. It's allowed me to have the freedom of love I've always wanted.

thebadmanpuntdbaxter · 2015-10-03T19:45:52+00:00

Blindly forcing self confidence is some bullshit self help nonsense. Confidence comes from proven success and experience. Convincing yourself that you're an amazing human being is arrogance. You don't get to be the same value as another man just by believing it.

Do you want to have a sexy masculine appearance? Build some muscles. Do you want to earn a living? Developed some marketable skills.

And you're right, no one will help you. But cut the victim mentality because you don't deserve their help.

Danedina · 2015-10-03T22:06:12+00:00

Do's: Go to class, study in the library, eat right, exercise (make sure there's real exertion), meditate (and/or yoga), read yourself to sleep before midnight

Don'ts: Porn, porn again, video games, crappy food, excessive alchohol

You need to get these things in order first before you decide to become a first-class player. Once your routine is a solid routine, then you move up a level to dressing nice, bachelor pad, hair, maintaining your frame, spitting game, etc.. But first you need to get yourself right physically and mentally. Meditation should help you with your anxiety.

Give yourself a year following all the advice you're getting here before giving up. You've got time. You're not even in the prime of your life as a man yet. Late 20's through your 30s will be your golden age if you've been diligent and don't have any kids in tow.

DotComod · 2015-10-03T22:35:26+00:00

"Gorilla mindset" @ Amazon

Observe your internal speak. Would you tell stuff you tell yourself to a friend? Would you loose that friend right after that?

Why would you want to tell shit like this to yourself?

Title	How to ACTUALLY stop hating yourself?
Author	DotComod
Upvotes	3
Comments	20
Date	October 3, 2015 6:58 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3nddf5/how_to_actually_stop_hating_yourself/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-to-actually-stop-hating-yourself.154684 https://theredarchive.com/post/154684

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