Landed a date. Looking for some first date advice.

MeansToABenz · 2019-09-26T02:34:32+00:00

You’re over thinking this player! Fuck up and fuck up some more, practice, practice, practice like your life depends on it

[deleted] · 2019-09-26T02:05:13+00:00

Demote to anal only plate.

Seriously, kid, just fuck up and make mistakes. You'll be fine. Lift like your life depends on it.

fastestsynapses · 2019-09-26T02:02:05+00:00

All you have to write is "tall" lmao. God I hate women

MR_SKINNYPENIS69 · 2019-09-26T05:46:28+00:00

As others said: practice.

Go in with the mindset that even if this doesn't go the way you hope or plan, you'll still have plenty more opportunities in the future. Also, regarding what she likes: every girl is different. There are general rules of thumb and commonalities, but some girls will like bars, some won't, some will be cool to just come over and chill, some will want to go to a mall, whatever. Just do what makes you happy and she'll follow - women prefer that, anyway. They hate it when a guy is like "...so what do you want to do?" and they have to be the leader.

Go out in public and people watch for an hour. Just an hour. You'll see more attractive women you'd happily fuck than you'll know what to do with. And that's just one street corner.

There are millions upon millions of them out there. Don't overthink this one and don't put too much into it. Just go and have fun, see what happens. If you're inexperienced I'd say just do that for now and see how it goes - figure out what your strengths and weaknesses are. Then you can worry about RP methodology a bit later and apply it to your weak areas.

Even if the worst possible thing happens like you shit your pants or get a weird boner and she sees it and freaks out, just walk a couple of blocks away to where nobody knows you and nobody knows what happened and realise how quiet and peaceful life really is and how much none of it matters. Then order a beer, laugh about it, and post the story on here so we can have a lol. Don't worry about it.

chadchadovsky · 2019-09-26T03:35:50+00:00

1: Try to get her to come to your home to watch a movie :)

2: No

3: Don't think about this. Even if you think you suck at talking with women, just show up and talk about silly things around you, ask her some personal questions... No politics(especially if she disagrees with you), no sad things... Keep it fun and don't overthink it!

4: Casually tell her you just moved in or something, doesn't matter at all.

5: It doesn't really matter. Just don't do it half-ass.

MattyAnon · 2019-09-26T11:48:33+00:00

ble. Here's the first conversation I had with a girl I found.

haha the allergy thing is cute. I'd have gone with "you should be fucking terrified", but that's me and might not be you.

here should the date be? Will any regular bar work? I'm not trying to spend too much money.

Bar yes, so long as you pay for drinks as you go. Tab at the end sucks for you.

hould I volunteer to pick her up, or should we just meet there?

You'll be drinking, so not sure how picking her up works. Generally I'd go for meeting her there.

Be early, expect her to be late, and MAKE FRIENDS WITH EVERYONE while you wait, then slowly shift attention to her when she gets there. Aim for somewhere you like so much you don't care if she doesn't show.

What should we talk about? I know you shouldn't talk about serious stuff like school and careers until later dates (if any), so what topics should we discuss?

Avoid interview questions..... "what's your name" "where do you work" etc.

Start by talking about something that's happened to you today... ideally something/anything you can talk about in a fun way.

Then tell her (note: "tell her" not "ask her") to tell you something fun (she'll fail) and give her a topic (much easier), like "tell me about your favourite X".

You want to be both talking, you want to be introducing new subjects faster than you finish previous ones (she'll think "wow we have so much in common). You want to talk and she'll join in. Avoid questions as far as humanly possible.

If she's attracted it'll be really easy, you just have to lead because attracted girls often get shy.

don't really have any furniture in my apartment, so the only place we would be able to chill or watch tv would be in my bed. Is that like... ok?

It's fine if you think it's fine. Ideally get another chair (anything at all), lead her / gently push her on the bed, then you sit on the chair, then you join her in bed as she relaxes.

When I meet her in the bar, should I hug her initially? Like a casual side-hug type thing?

Fuck that shit.... go for the full face to face hug, pull her in tight but only for a second.

ComplexProjection · 2019-09-26T14:04:21+00:00

The mindset is: do something you want to do, and let her join. If it is going for a drink, then so be it. But it could be walking in a park, do a roadtrip to the next city, ... anything. Usually, people try to do something that can lead to a lay. In that regard, choose a bar next to your place.
Usually I meet girls at the place, but lastly I have found picking up the girl with my car allows me to be totaly in control of the date. Stay modest, meet the girl there.
What you talk about is irrelevant. You just have to not look like a retard. What you do is what is important. Sit next to her. Touch her when you talk, when she laugh, when you laugh. Kino is what counts.
If she comes to your appartement, it is not to chill. Once she passes your door, fuck her.
Cultural point here. I don't know where you are from. Welcome her like you would welcome a friend.

spongemarble · 2019-09-26T02:57:07+00:00

Get ice cream and walk around a park, bring a football. Pay for her ice cream.
Meet there, picking up on first date is creepy because she can't leave if you're weird
Mostly focus on logistics of date. Examples: hmm what kind of ice cream are you getting. Alright let's take our cream to the park. Oooh there's a good bench let's go to there. Ok well I'm not a big talker, let's throw a football. As the man you should be driving the action not conversation. However, if you do need to be conversational focus on who she is not what she is. Ask about what she does in her free time what music she listens to. Don't ask about school or work.
You will need to give her a good excuse to get her in your room on first date due to lmr and asd. Also, let's watch a tv show at my apartment is pretty bad game. Generally let's grab another drink or play a board game is better.
Side hug. Want to look interested but not yet invested

danielcrestwellbestb · 2019-09-26T02:12:21+00:00

Damn why tf does everyone over 20 talk like they’re 40 years old

silent_dominant · 2019-09-26T09:30:00+00:00

Plan an activity, not just drinks.

Go for a walk or go bowling or whatever.

ggggggggee · 2019-09-26T06:03:20+00:00

Watch these

https://youtu.be/uNkWOfLuXFY

https://youtu.be/TrPRT1hGO9w

rpnavi · 2019-09-26T06:25:25+00:00

Don't overthink it. Your neediness will seep out. But since you asked:

1. Where should the date be? Will any regular bar work? I'm not trying to spend too much money.

You should go some place you are more familiar with to have the home advantage.

2. Should I volunteer to pick her up, or should we just meet there?

You could pick her up at a bus/train station near the location, but don't pick her up at her place, that's just creepy for a tinder date.

3. What should we talk about? I know you shouldn't talk about serious stuff like school and careers until later dates (if any), so what topics should we discuss?

It depends...learn how to make conversation.

4. I don't really have any furniture in my apartment, so the only place we would be able to chill or watch tv would be in my bed. Is that like... ok? I feel like it would be weird just walking in and going straight to the bed?

Don't overthink it. Give her the excuse that 'one thing led to another'

5. When I meet her in the bar, should I hug her initially? Like a casual side-hug type thing?

No, that's hard to pull off non-creepily. Unless you're over 8/10, then yes.

Title	Landed a date. Looking for some first date advice.
Author	the_zodiac_miller
Upvotes	13
Comments	25
Date	September 26, 2019 1:59 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/d9d3fd/landed_a_date_looking_for_some_first_date_advice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/landed-a-date-looking-for-some-first-date-advice.287595 https://theredarchive.com/post/287595

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