Hi TRP.

I am a 26 year old male. Dated a 26 year old female for 7 years.

We broke up after she had an affair with an engaged man.

She keeps contacting me periodically (about once a month, via email) to see how I am doing. I think this is motivated by guilt because she really put me through something aweful.

Anyway sometimes I consider contacting her, not because I am interested in her, but because I feel like I need some closure. She doesn't deserve forgiveness. But I fear that without forgiveness I will continue to dwell on it. I wonder if contacting her again, after 8 months of no contact, to have an "adult" discussion about what happened (now that both of our heads are clearer) would be worthwhile?

A lot of people say that you can't win in this situation (contacting the cheating ex) and its best to forget it and move on. But a part of me thinks there could be some closure there, because she seems adament on talking to me.

Is there a specific set of rules you would employ when speaking to an ex in this situation? Or would you avoid the situation alltogether.