LTR is demanding respect

superdoofus69 · 2018-07-28T04:50:26+00:00

Say, "I treat you with respect as is. I respect myself and my time too. If that's a problem then I'm not the man you're looking for."

To quote Patrice O'neal, "You have to say, ‘Look sweetie, this is how it is.’ You have to be ready for her to walk out of your life."

Chad1738 · 2018-07-28T05:01:08+00:00

Lol. Sounds like a little girl fishing for attention. “Look here buddy, pay attention too me!!!!!!” “I can’t stand when you don’t text me for seven hours!!!” “Pay attention to me!!!”

Ignore her and her request. She is trying to break your frame. Don’t let her. Btw her emotions aren’t your responsibility they are hers.

BPasFuck · 2018-07-28T05:58:26+00:00

I strongly suspect that OP has missed some comfort tests, or otherwise been oblivious to some things for something ridiculous like this to become such a big deal.

I would:

1) Act like this is all something that never happened.

2) If she brings it up, I'd give her something along the lines of what u/superdoofus69 suggested re: "This is how it is-- if you need to go, go. Live your life without me, if my respect isn't enough for you."

And if she walked-- that's fine. Odds are decent she'll come crawling back. If she doesn't-- well, you've had a learning experience that'll serve you in good stead. On to the next one.

hiddenpleasures123 · 2018-07-28T07:04:44+00:00

Be ready to cut your losses. If I were you...which you seem like you want this girl in your life...You want it to work.

I would do just this: flip the script and say "I have done nothing to disrespect you. I have a life and hobbies... I have priorities and texting you isn't one of them. You however disrespected me by giving me an ultimatum. I can't have people that behave the way you did in my life."

She will most likely cave at this point and ask what you mean. You tell her "I need some time to think about things. I'll call you". Then disappear for a few days/a week.

Nergaal · 2018-07-28T11:53:48+00:00

I refused to apologise and that I said her emotions weren’t my responsibility.

1st rule of fight club is don't talk about fight club. Just because her emotions are not your responsibility, doesn't mean you have to spell it out in her face.

RedLegendx · 2018-07-28T04:17:03+00:00

Have you done anything over the top disrespectful to her? Also, it sounds like an ultimatum, you can show her the way out if she continues with these.

Whisper · 2018-07-28T15:06:29+00:00

ultimatum

I believe you meant to say ex-LTR.

boy_named_su · 2018-07-28T06:44:54+00:00

"I am what I is. Take it or leave it honey"

RPAlternate42 · 2018-07-28T07:12:44+00:00

Say nothing. Nothing needs to be said. Respect is through action, not promises of respect through ultimatums. If she doesn't recognize that actions speak louder than words then she will either leave, or she won't.

TheStumblingWolf · 2018-07-28T08:18:30+00:00

It's a powerplay. For me ultimatums are a huge no-no. If you give in to this demand, she will learn her actions are working and demand more and more.

gorilla_bro · 2018-07-28T13:43:49+00:00

Next.

YesVeryKewl · 2018-07-28T12:09:14+00:00

I strongly doubt this is the only type of "disrespect" you've shown to her.

she's your LTR, not a plate.

The problem with you guys here is you think you can maintain an LTR with an alpha plate game. You can't.

Sometimes you can be a dick and not reply to her text for 7 hours, and you should, but most of the time this is not gonna fly by.

Follow the 50/50 rule: for every dickish disrespectful thing you do (like not texting back for 7 hours), give her something cute and "beta" in return.

That's how to maintain an LTR, you need a healthy balance of alpha and beta behaviors.

DarlingMissLee · 2018-07-28T07:11:49+00:00

Give her the pipe instead (:

kendallb183 · 2018-07-28T13:14:55+00:00

Well, the question is, is she earning your respect? If a chick is doing all the right things and your going overboard, your being a Rambo.

She has to feel she can win you over... but you decide what does win you over.

Babe your a dork if you think be being busy and not being able to respond mean I dont care about you. As far as respect, I give respect to those who earn it, right now I'd say you've been earning it by ______, so of course I respect you.

Then say nothing else on the matter. You've spoken, you're frame has been stated, dont DEER. If she goes on and on... then be quiet, laugh a little stay light hearted... and say you hate to cut it short but you GTG.

Show her its conditional, not a given... but you have to be fair and not deny her or grant her respect youd do anyone else for behaving certain ways. Dont be a pussy, dont be a Rambo.

[deleted] · 2018-07-28T17:11:28+00:00

I'd ask what specifically she is talking about. Get to the point on how you actually disrespect her. My guess is that because most men today are fucking simps, she feels "disrespected" because you aren't constantly validating her with texts and flowers and all that other simp shit.

Abeham10 · 2018-07-28T23:01:50+00:00

Listen my guy I hope it’s not oneitis. She is mad became she wanted attention which you didn’t give her because you respect your time and didn’t wanna deal with your childish bullshit. Listen to the guys in the comments. If you show her that you are willing to give her up because you will not put up with her BS, she is more than likely to respect you a lot more. Or, she may leave and then come back or not. Be a man and respect your time and boundaries.

ex_addict_bro · 2018-07-28T23:30:26+00:00

What part of "text only for logistics" you want me to explain

TheTrenTrannyTrain · 2018-07-28T09:16:22+00:00

Respect is to be earned. She's feeling entitled, soft next her.

oneorigin · 2018-07-28T04:18:39+00:00

If you don't respect your GF (for what she is), then you don't respect yourself. But you should clarify, what she means by respect.

69odin420 · 2018-07-28T05:23:03+00:00

Tell her "I promise to continue treating you with respect" when she says you didn't in the past tell her that you're a busy person and that has nothing to do with being disrespectful. Or just break up with her and join trp.

Title	LTR is demanding respect
Author	821sleepingbag
Upvotes	9
Comments	31
Date	July 28, 2018 4:11 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/92jcbe/ltr_is_demanding_respect/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/ltr-is-demanding-respect.103830 https://theredarchive.com/post/103830

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