Men giving ultimatums, is it bad behavior or do women respect a man who will put everything on the line or peace out?

Flamethrowa21 · 2019-05-20T03:08:18+00:00

Ultimatums are terrible. You're supposed to be unfazed by her behavior. Either she won't take you seriously or she'll find you extremely controlling. Both put you in the beta category.

Project_Zero_Betas · 2019-05-20T03:12:38+00:00

If she values you and your relationship enough, there should be nothing she'd even consider doing to warrant an ultimatum in the first place.

I mean,

"if you go out with her tonight to the club, your shit will be on the street when you get home"

Super beta.

Big_Red_suppository · 2019-05-20T03:19:10+00:00

Two chicks at the club and you acting like a 50 year old lesbian

scanfan2022 · 2019-05-20T04:19:13+00:00

Rollo Tomassi advises against giving ultimatums. He describes them as an expression of powerlessness. He recommends that men demonstrate boundaries through action as opposed to explicating.

Aymane221 · 2019-05-20T03:18:13+00:00

Scarcity..don’t do it

MentORPHEUS · 2019-05-20T05:06:40+00:00

Can ultimatums, or fear bring comfort to a relationship?

An ultimatum is a measure of last resort and mild desperation. It's better to have asserted your expectations upfront, and if they aren't met, deliver your ultimatum using your feet.

FereallyRed · 2019-05-20T05:33:55+00:00

Ultimatums are beta incarnate.

You need to stop posting entry level questions and read the sidebar articles.

https://www.trp.red/p/theasshole/287

https://therationalmale.com/2012/05/07/ultimatum/

_-resonance-_ · 2019-05-20T03:49:32+00:00

Being unfazed by her behavior is the only way to suggest the vibe that you “accept her the way she is.” Since in this case you actually don’t, your only option is to focus on boosting your SMV.

You do have plenty of other options, don’t you? She knows your doing her a favor by sharing a relationship with her, doesn’t she?

Bedtimeshine · 2019-05-20T10:46:22+00:00

Only give ultimatums with your actions. You’re getting a lot of advice about ultimatums being beta and not to do them. They’re right but the advice isn’t complete. Don’t refrain from giving ultimatums and then just sit there and take it. If she crosses a boundary, let her. But respond by removing your commitment and loosening the boundaries you operate in. If your girl goes to the club don’t give her an ultimatum... just shrug your shoulders and say to yourself “guess she wants to be casual now.” And act accordingly.

password3458 · 2019-05-20T03:32:12+00:00

Sleep on it before you make that decision. IF it still warrants an ultimatum in 2 days probably shouldn't be with her so fuck it, and give it to her. BTW no coming back from a nuclear option like that you have to back up what you say or she will never respect you.

WIA20XX · 2019-05-20T06:43:03+00:00

If that chick wants a girls night out and the guy puts his foot down - the gate was wide open and the horse already left the barn. The "queen" is already comfortable enough to start looking into other kingdoms.

At ultimatum at this point looks pathetic.

But....

I am going to keep saying this, alpha does whatever the fuck he wants.

Alpha does not care what other people think, he cares what he thinks. He doesn't care if she stays.

But if she stays, she follows his rules. And if she doesn't follow his rules, he takes the appropriate steps. That is all there is to it.

Instead of trying to actively control a chick, or doing self development as a passive aggressive way to control the chick - he controls himself.

If you're alpha, the chick should be afraid that you'll go fuck some chick better than her if she fucks up in any way. If the chick is clingy and overly dependent, constantly fretting and insecure about her place in your life - you are doing what the Red Pill teaches.

If she's not doing everything possible for you, giving you her everything, she will find another guy to do that for.

And if that sounds tedious and terrible, and it is, but that's what you're signing up for. That is what dread means.

If you're coming at this thing from a blue pill state of mind, where you want the chick to be happy or at least content, you haven't absorbed the truth about female psychology and sexual strategy.

In order for her to be "happy" she has to be in tension.

With the red pill, things are pretty black and white.

Irtotallynotrobot · 2019-05-20T11:30:11+00:00

I think it's something that's really only useable in very specific scenarios. If she does something serious, something violent for example. It has to be used at the moment the transgression occurs, not in "discussions" over time. It explains the stakes of her actions. "Do X again and Y will happen". You have to be committed to it, no backing out. Once X happens, no more talk.

ChadTheWaiter100 · 2019-05-20T13:05:46+00:00

Just say it like - my girlfriend doesn’t go to clubs. If you go, you’re not my gf.

BluBlac59 · 2019-05-23T03:59:01+00:00

Never give an ultimatum. It's giving power away. Beta move. Let her go. Pack her stuff put it In a cheap storage unit change the house locks. Give her the key to the storage unit sometime when it's convenient for you. Be free.

Lucifyer · 2019-05-20T14:03:19+00:00

Dude I'm gonna give you a different perspective, ultimatums aren't bad as long as you truly dont care if you lose her or not. If my girl does something I dont like I'll tell her and she won't do it again, now that's power. If she does something I dont like twice, I will kick her the fuck out and slap the shit out of her, I dont care if some red virgin behind the screen on asktrp advises against it. I'm not putting up with anyone's shit because I'm independent, if she won't suck my dick some other girl will because I am a SOMEONE.

Title	Men giving ultimatums, is it bad behavior or do women respect a man who will put everything on the line or peace out?
Author	ElvisDimera
Upvotes	3
Comments	37
Date	May 20, 2019 3:03 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/bqpy14/men_giving_ultimatums_is_it_bad_behavior_or_do/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/men-giving-ultimatums-is-it-bad-behavior-or-do.238979 https://theredarchive.com/post/238979

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