She's the problem? Seeing Blue through Red Tinted Glasses

This is going to be a long one.

I came to the RedPill to solve my dead bedroom issue with my LTR. I was taught by you guys that the issues in the relationship were mine and I had to fix them. Suffice to say I started lifting, lost weight and put on some muscle.

So I went through the depression and anger phase of Red Pill with the likes of The Manipulated Man. I digested the sidebar. I discovered Frame, AA, AM and the soft next. I did what most guys going into Red Pill do mistakenly, I went in this to remedy a dead bedroom. I did it to become a better man. The kind of man my girlfriend genuinely desires. The men she has on her calendar, buff & attractive.

Yet, it didn't change anything for me. She can only see Beta in me. She encourages Beta. She rewards Beta, albeit in the short term but the end result is always the same. She's got the power. She could care less.

My LTR

34 years old. Attractive for her age but has put on some weight. Vegan. Reads Everyday Feminism religiously. Great career but terrible with money. Lives 4 hours away from me so we have to travel to see each other every weekend. Of course it ends up being me travelling to see her mostly.

She goes through heavy bouts of depression and withdrawing from people, including me. She broke up with me due to it once. Her friends are also hideous people. With one of them having a criminal record alongside her boyfriend. She has also cut herself whilst she's been with me.

She doesn't want kids anytime soon despite over the wall. This puts me off wanting to invest in her long term.

To sum my LTR up though, Rollo's Iron Rule plays deeply into this part because she cares the least and has for the better part of the relationship had all of the control.

Before RedPill

I didn't know it because I discovered game over 10 years ago at a young age, but I was very deeply Blue Pill. I developed a great sense of humour and I could identify beta traits but in relationships I would easily embody them. That's the issue with Game. If you don't understand how the world truly works, you are going in blind.

So, I've been dating her 11 months in total. I started doing nice gestures for her. I bought her flowers to her workplace. I bought her dinners to her favourite restaurant. I saw how it made her happy in the short term but in the long term her disrespect grew for me. I genuinely can say I didn't do things as a form of covert contract, i didn't expect anything like sex or her approval in return. Yet the end was the same. Huge disrespect.

The Dead Bedroom/intimacy issue

At first, we we're having sex all the time. Don't they all say that? Over time she became less interested in sex with me. It was just who she was, she would say. I would go down on her all the time and make her orgasm hard. She was satisfied with it being once every week.

When I brought up that I would like sex more than once a week. My needs didn't matter.

Then it turned to once every other week. Then I would be coming down to see her only to be greeted with a no makeup looking banshee, with her "i hope you dont expect sex tonight" Even to the point where she would barely kiss me after travelling four hours to see her.

Communication was key she said. Yet whenever I brought it up she would scold me almost. "How dare you bring this up. You are trying to guilt me into sex" I would dread going to bed with her because it would result in lack of intimacy and her snoring with her needy cat coming onto the bed and trying to sit on my head.

I was missing genuine desire.

RedPill Discovery & Changes in My behavior

I couldn't handle it anymore. I decided to look back into Game. That's where I discovered RedPill. Digested it 4 months ago. Started Intermittent Fasting. Lost weight. Built muscle on 5x5. Felt like a fucking god. A new man. Yet there was someone who just didn't give a fuck.

Granted, it's a process. In terms of alpha mindset, even I know I am not fully there but I know I have come a long way. I re-correct my behavior and don't get butt hurt when sex doesn't occur. I go do something else.

Unfazed LTR

Wow, you've lost so much weight, her friends said. Yet to my LTR, I looked the same. No problem, it's long term I thought. I started to discover something so insidous about her. Something that I think all women are capable of doing without realising.

She was rewarding Beta and trying to kill my newly alpha mindset. It was like, "You are this certain way. I have you figured out. Don't pretend to be anything you are not, weak beta."

She inspires Beta. She inspires it because it's her covert contract "He should provide for me. It's expected" Once I realised this, I knew I didn't owe her shit.

AA. AM. Cocky funny. All things that got a smile from her but nothing more. I was her beta.

Now my job pays better than hers. When she hinted about us moving in together and started looking at houses she'd like us to move into. I figured it out. That I was her Beta Bucks.

Nothing worked. Yet I was getting interest off of other women. The dread would fire her up for a night of sex but she knew once she played the pussy card I was her Beta again. I would lose myself in blue pill comfort that the release of sex gave me. "You're too easy" she smugly would say.

So I watched and observed...

Seeing Beta Through Red Tinted Glasses

I spent last weekend just observing how she encourages the beta in me and discourages the alpha. It was an experiment so I shut up mostly.

In a space of a weekend.

• She sent me Everyday Feminism articles on how a man should act whilst I was travelling to see her. My response "I'm sure I'll read it when I'm on the toilet sometime."

• Wouldn't go out to dinner because I said she had to pay half. Sulked. Said that I promised her.

• Still sulked about me not paying fully for dinner. When I offered her a drink at the shop, because she had no cash she said, instead of being thankful, "Do you want that on an IOU so you can use it against me"

• Had no food in her house, so I paid for my shopping. She starts putting things on the cart. My mistake. I let her. Showed disrespect in the shop when I mistakenly placed a soft item on the bottom. Tried to scold me loudly in front of everyone.

• Told me she hated my new smug personality. That I was treating her bad. I shut up, nodded and smirked.

• Went to her friends house. She was happy to put me down in front of friends on how i am incompetent in her eyes. But when I said "Well she isn't vegan either, she had KFC last week with me. She loves chicken." I.e the truth lol she went berserk in the car and didn't speak to me for the rest of the night.

• Firework display. I said yeah sounds good its only £10 each, we are going tonight. I'll pay my half. "I thought you was paying my half, you said" I actually didn't say that at all. We ended up not going because she wouldn't pay her half.

• Still once a week sex. I ended up going down on her and making her cum really hard. I asked why she doesn't go down on me often. "I don't like doing it as much as you. It sounds like you are trying to guilt me into it"

• Next day she doesn't ask how I got home or anything. Just send me a picture of an empty jar saying. "You ate all my protein cookies..." Yes I did. 3 to be exact. 25g of protein.

• Sends me a text on how she doesn't know if she can move in with me (her idea) if I can carry on treating her the way I did this weekend. I laugh inside to myself.

Conclusion

My LTR sees me as Beta Bucks. Without observing I didn't realise how much she actually got me to pay for everything. Which is odd and frightening. She had subtle ways of doing it and sulking to get what she wanted.

The odd thing is, she believes in Feminist values. Equality. Only when it suits her right? Reason why I despise feminism.

According to her, I owe her 1700 in petrol, meals together and other little things like that for whenever she got the bill. I'm not paying her shit.

It is an end result of me going into the Red Pill and realising I am with a woman who thinks its okay to disrespect their partner and use gaslighting and sulking tactics when she doesn't get her own way. I know all women are self centered but I can honestly say my past partners have never been as apathetic as her.

I went into this to change myself to be a man my woman would want to fuck. Only to realise being with her I feel unattractive and incompetent because all she wants from me is beta.

I'm now in a predicament where I want to break away from her. But a part of me is still holding onto the comfort. But there is no future with her. I suppose I wrote this here because I hear everyone in the Red Pill community go "You are the problem"

I suppose I also wrote this as a thanks to all the guys who gave me advice in this sub, whilst at the same time realising that the Red Pill is about your own journey despite going into it for blue pill ideals.

Also realising that.

Well what if she is the problem?

Thanks for reading.