Using her words against her?

Old_Pine_Tree · 2014-03-26T17:58:45+00:00

It's mostly being a douche.

The reason is because that response is designed to demean rather than institute positive behaviour and division of duties. Remember that an ideal outcome would be you eating your dessert in peace with her acting like a functional adult and getting her own.

Yeah, you could point out the inconsistent logic jokingly like you might do if amused by a difficult child that you are patronizing good-naturedly, but unless you have excellent frame you will fuck it up.

Instead, it will lead to a fight where you will lose because such conflicts are never about logic or who's right or wrong, but rather about how badly you made her feel. That can be successful for you, but you need to know your shit.

In the beginning it's better to mitigate problems before they exist, rather than solve ones you have created.

[deleted] · 2014-03-27T01:32:41+00:00

[permanently deleted]

tangman · 2014-03-26T17:30:14+00:00

That response can work as long as you aren't actually expecting a serious answer.

She's obviously just trying to fuck with you. It's important to not take her seriously. Don't let her fuck with your good mood or your enjoyment of the evening. After all, you just had a good fucking meal with dessert.

"Too bad! You don't eat dessert, remember? Now you get to watch me eat mine. Slowly. Mmmmm."

mikelovesvegas · 2014-03-26T18:35:29+00:00

She's trying to say she doesn't want to eat a whole dessert and wants you to give her part of yours.

This is hamster 101. You have to identify the hamster in everything women do.

masterrod · 2014-03-26T20:12:26+00:00

For example, one day after dinner I got up to get us dessert, and she announced she does not eat dessert. Some time later I got myself some dessert, and she complained I didn't get some for her too. In a situation like this, is "You don't eat dessert, remember?" a correct response?

Women don't run programs, you can't expect because do one input you get an output all the time. So, delivery is more important than what you say. If you're saying something douchey look in her eyes and smile, she'll know you're joking, but she will also know what you said.

You could say "You don't' eat dessert, remember?" Smile, look in her eyes. Then say, "Well, maybe able to share if you're nice, but don't get your hopes up."

If you can't have fun with her what's the point?

I know that truth is whatever she wants it to be at the moment, but I'm asking because I can't tell if using her words against her is redpill or just being a douche.

Does it matter how you categorize it?

Immuchtooawesome · 2014-03-26T21:54:37+00:00

Yeah it's kinda douchey.

Have you seen this? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGQlZ4b9RRM

Although Raymond is pretty beta the whole show, his actions here didn't get the desired result.

Fucty_Artsy · 2014-03-26T22:11:41+00:00

It depends on the situation.

If you go and prepare a dessert you can be expected to ask if she want some too since you're already in the course of preparation it wouldn't make a hassle to make some for her. If you don't ask and she gets angry although it would be an alpha move it won't do much for your relationship happiness. So best would be to ask when you're preparing a dessert.

If you only go to the fridge to grab a yoghurt it doesn't matter if you ask if she wants some as well. If you ask you build relationship comfort which is good. If you don't ask and she complains simply look her in the eyes and tell her she's a big girl already and can grab one herself if she wants. Do it with a little smirk and smack her ass if possible. Note that you should already be by her side to pull this off correctly. If you're still standing at the fridge and tell her she should go get her own it would be a dick move. Only do it if it's less work for you than for her. For you this should be a better approach than asking her because it will built good alpha. From what you write I think you're too beta now.

It sounds complicated but it really isn't after you finally internalized a few concepts. And remember don't care about the outcome and never care about her reaction when making a decision. You can be happy yourself regardless of her moods.

Edit: Just to clarify if she generally meant to say she never eats dessert it is a good move not to ask and eat your dessert. If she complains then be all riddled and tell her she said she doesn't eat dessert. She can grab her own if she wants one since she's a big girl and you're enjoying your dessert already. If she only meant to say she doesn't eat dessert on this one occasion see above.

aaron_the_just · 2014-03-28T08:14:08+00:00

Using logic and reason on a woman is a waste of time.

Instead, decide what emotional state you want to have and use your words (or lack thereof) to create that state.

robesta · 2014-03-26T18:36:45+00:00

If you're a high value man, do you really give a fuck if your chick is eating your dessert? If she knows you're that easy to rattle she will lose respect for you. Nothing she can say should rattle you.

Title	Using her words against her?
Author	kempff
Upvotes	8
Comments	16
Date	March 26, 2014 4:34 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/21fbzk/using_her_words_against_her/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/using-her-words-against-her.139186 https://theredarchive.com/post/139186

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