Afraid I won’t find someone better

jackzander · 2024-11-25T22:55:08+00:00

Honestly can't tell why you're wanting to leave.

You had 5 single years to get your life in order, so it's weird that you think being single again will help. Frankly, it sounds like an excuse to delay action and effort.

Work on yourself now. Not later.

SweetJellyPie · 2024-11-25T22:57:32+00:00

Ah the good old self sabotaging. Communicate what you feel you need and least give her the chance to compromise and work on it together, if it doesnt work out, at least you tried. I left a good relationship once because i felt like i had no more freedom and could no longer do whatever i wanted, whenever i wanted. Or more importantly, not do the draining things i didn't want to do. I felt like i was happier single, which i found out to be true, the vast majority of the time. I do, however, regret not giving her a chance to give me more of what i wanted/needed instead of breaking up with her out of the blue. Might have had the best of both worlds then. But hey, live and learn i guess.

CrazyRepulsive8244 · 2024-11-25T23:54:08+00:00

You sound bored, or you have trauma and you are distancing. You didn't describe why you wanted to leave. It sounds like your setting yourself up to enjoy a multi year pity party full of regret.

You don't sound like somebody ready for a relationship. You want better? Different? More? While being self deprecating and insecure. The dating world is harder than ever now. Id think about this.

MorganScott616 · 2024-11-25T23:26:46+00:00

Have you studied seduction and how to pick up women? If not, you might be right about never finding someone better. Educate yourself and develop an unfair advantage in order to gain a lot of options. This is how you win.

A1Horizon · 2024-11-26T00:53:54+00:00

You think you should leave her because of your low opinion of yourself, but she chose you despite the things you criticise yourself for?

Guess what bro, regardless of how much you work on your anxiety and financial situation outside of a relationship, you can’t “fix” your height, and you can’t “fix” your baldness (for cheap). Those things will be there regardless of how much you improve yourself.

As someone who’s been single for a while, having someone who’s in your corner while you think you’re at your lowest is more valuable than anything in the world. You’ll progress much faster and have someone to look back on your growth with. You don’t need to find someone better, and even if you do, you’ll always look back thinking what if?

No-Preference8767 · 2024-11-26T01:13:20+00:00

Now I’m thinking, at this time, I need to be single for awhile. Being in a relationship is presenting some new challenges and I need space to think about them, or to be alone temporarily, while I formulate a plan and get on track. I need to work on myself in a few more areas.

What challenges? Mental stuff ? Work related things ?

But…I’m short, bald, and sort of broke. I don’t own a house, or have anything in savings. I have anxiety and so much awkwardness speaking with people. For these reasons I think I should stay. But that’s not fair to her, to have a man stick around because he thinks he can’t do better. She’s beautiful, but has children, has a small-sized family - and I love that, not many female friends and doesn’t go out partying - love that. She has so many good qualities.

Well you either need to cheat on her to level up or stay with her despite you wanting to level up. You definitely don't want to squander the comfortability and advantage of having a girlfriend just because your going through some things. Sad reality of being a guy but you have more to lose being single.

What are your issues with her ? I'm still not understanding that part.

I understand feeling like shit because you think she would feel bad knowing what's inside your head but

At this point you don't even know if it's exactly true that you can do better
1. There are plenty of unsavory thoughts you can have about a person you love. It's more about how you treat them and what thoughts come to mind the strongest.

SpinPlates · 2024-11-26T04:55:36+00:00

Damn I wish I had that mindset. I’m afraid I’ll always find someone better….and I always do.

People change. You change. She changes. Once an awesome compatible relationship turns into a nightmare where you resent them.

If you want to be happy then settle down with your women and delete social media. My ability to pair bond is essential gone because my body count is too high.

Title	Afraid I won’t find someone better
Author	Available_Cut6655
Upvotes	1
Comments	28
Date	November 25, 2024 10:40 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1gzw7x8/afraid_i_wont_find_someone_better/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/afraid-i-wont-find-someone-better.1536867 https://theredarchive.com/post/1536867

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