Approach to going out alone with confidence?

Imaginary_Bear_2710 · 2024-07-22T09:33:42+00:00

Do a test run.

Go to the movie theater and watch a movie by yourself.
You can either go during the day but, best time to do it is a Friday or Saturday night when there's a lot of people.
Make sure to get something from the concession stand. Only get 1 of whatever you decide to get.

(Whatever you purchased is just a token to lets you and your anxious self know no one's coming to join you and you're not meeting up with anyone in the theater. keeps you grounded in the reality that you're there alone in this situation. )

Keep a mental note of moments where you suddenly lose confidence.

I didn't realize that I had never been to see a movie in a theater by myself until I went to see Fast X.

Anyway the point of all this is to get you around other people you don't know, by yourself, for a long period of time.

But the cool thing is, minus the employees, it removes the anxiety of having to talk to other people cuz your it's a movie theater. Stfu lol..

ALWAYS BE AWARE OF YOUR SURROUNDINGS.

ArcaneAces · 2024-07-21T19:38:40+00:00

Festivals, game nights, local parties. Go to places where you can vanish in the crowd and also have fun even if you don't get lucky.

Hot_Outside_968 · 2024-07-21T19:47:45+00:00

I don't understand why someone needs confidence to go somewhere alone? I mean confidence to do what? I need confidence to go to the supermarket? I don't try to be mean, it's just I don't feel that when I go out alone

Western-Month-3877 · 2024-07-21T21:19:14+00:00

But I feel like after figuring out the first part the rest gets easier.

You got it backwards. The first parts like venues, or what to say (opening) are the easier ones.

GymBroTRT · 2024-07-22T00:16:54+00:00

Ask yourself, if you had a friend who looked exactly like you, had the exact same history and experiences as you the exact same thoughts and feelings and aspirations, but his name was Bob instead of whatever your name is. Would you talk to him the same way you are talking to yourself just now? Would you tell him “hey bro, you are kind of short, you are a minority and quite honestly not sure why any girl will want you. Plus you are kind of coming across as desperate.”

Is this something you’d say to a dear friend?

MouseAware809 · 2024-07-22T22:31:48+00:00

Question for you: When you go out anywhere with friends, do you pay attention to who is by themselves, or are you focussing on yourself and having fun?

Yeah, I am not saying riding solo is easy. However, most people do not actually care that your by yourself.

If someone does say "Why are you by yourself". Yeah I do lie:

"I was on a Tinder date and I ended it early as she was not my type"

"My friends went home but I stayed out"

"Yeah, well I was sat at home bored, so I decided to come out and see if there was anything exciting happening. Whats the craziest thing you have ever done? Impress me"

Swimming-Dingo3393 · 2024-07-23T06:00:05+00:00

Find hobbies and volunteering are great places to start

McPigg · 2024-07-24T20:47:19+00:00

I personally liked bigger busy bars, bars with a dancefloor, student bars, alternative (like rock, underground techno) clubs, outdoor festivities and bar streets better in the beginning. Girls werent as hot as in the cool clubs, and music wasnt my cup of tea, but felt like a less aggressive vibe, more casual, no scary door guys etc.

In general, I found going out alone super creepy and awkward, i mean who tf does that, everyone at the bar and party seems to be with friends in my city.

What helped me a ton was at first, going out with friends/collegues (anyone, doesnt matter even the biggest most boring losers will do), soon after arrival ditching them and going off on my own to talk to randoms for longer and longer times.

Then I started meeting up with them at the bar, but myself coming like an hour early, talking to random people until they arrived.

Combining that (you come an hour eraly, chill with them for a few minutes, then go off on your own again), the difference to them just never being there at all is minimal.

I guess you can just force yourself through the awkwardness & anxiety the hard way by just going alone until you get bored or pissed off enough to break through anxiety, but to me that felt impossible after a few unsuccesful tries, so thats how I got myself comfortable in a more gradual manner. Still wasnt super easy, but definitly felt more managable.

No-Preference8767 · 2024-07-21T21:18:57+00:00

You should go to places where your mistakes will not be punished and you have excuses for any socially inappropriate behavior. Your local Clubs fulfill those conditions because there are tons of people , it's dark , and there is an excuse of alcohol. You also could be talking to drunk people as well and that makes them less aware of any mistakes.

You could also just drive / train to places with lots of people in the age range you want that's a 40 - 60 min commute.

You could also combine the two and go to clubs that are farther away. once you get to a level of social inappropriateness that you'd be comfortable with people knowing about, then you can start going out during the day closer to where you live.

Title	Approach to going out alone with confidence?
Author	Noodledawg2
Upvotes	3
Comments	10
Date	July 21, 2024 7:16 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1e8u3mw/approach_to_going_out_alone_with_confidence/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/approach-to-going-out-alone-with-confidence.1524922 https://theredarchive.com/post/1524922

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