During my research class, in our group building activity with groups of 2-4, we were required to build the tallest tower out of spaghetti that could support a marshmallow. We were given 20 pieces of dried spaghetti, 1 yard of tape, a piece of paper, and 1 yard of string. We planned for about ⅔ of the allotted time, which was about 30 minutes out of 45 minutes. This was a common theme among the groups, to plan so much that they barely finish building or do not end up finishing. Luckily, our group was able to finish. We carefully planned our structure, but made adjustments along the way. We ended up finishing in the middle of the pack. In the end, my professor told us that this is an analogy to researching. Sometimes, you plan for things to go one way, but you end up making minor adjustments, or completely changing the plan. Sometimes you won’t reach your goal. Sometimes won’t come out as you expect it. That’s completely fine and is inevitable. She told us that kindergartners do the best with this challenge. Kindergartners! They tend to do better than undergraduate engineers! Why? This goes against all logic. We can do calculus and solve physics problems, but children can’t! This is because kindergartners don’t really have the capability to plan. They just do. They just dive right in, without thinking what would happen if they fail. They do not waste time beating around the bush, planning for the perfect execution.

This theme can be applied to seduction. Why don’t we just bring out the inner kindergartner out of us? Why not stop planning the perfect interaction? Why not stop going online, reading articles and guides on how to pick women up, and dive right in instead? Why not just start talking to girls and making adjustments along the way? Things might not come out the way we expect in the beginning. Sometimes you think a certain technique will work, but you end up realizing that the technique isn’t for you. So, you try something else. Sometimes you won’t reach your goal of attracting a woman, even after taking action for most of your “allotted time”. But that’s okay. Isn’t that better than just planning for the whole “allotted time” and not being able to even start? Sometimes our “allotted time” is our time in high school, college, our whole 20’s, or something else. It is too common that we get near the end of our “allotted time” without even “starting to build”. Only then, we realize that we should have “started building” sooner. We often learn more from our experiences and fuck ups rather than what we read online. Why not allocate more time to doing rather than planning? Let’s bring out the inner kindergartners inside of us and dive right in.