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[–]frie-with-a-tie 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Yeah maybe, but who knows since we can not look into her head. Either you ask her again sometime or you tell her to contact you if she is free. Then you can see if she wants to see you or not. Move on afterwards, you have nothing to loose.
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Yeah ur right you have you nothing to loose, however she told you that she is going to tell you if she is free but instead you ask her before she tells you. Doesn't that look desperate and kills attraction:/?
[–]Lotus_82 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It looks weak and desperate, and of she had been interested she would have let him know. Girls don’t communicate like men. Men do the direct approach, the “confrontation” format, and they want everything clear cut like it’s either yes or no and a lot of guys who aren’t good at seduction don’t understand that that’s not how women communicate.
In seduction communication is a lot more subtle and if a guy isn’t capable of reading in between the lines he’ll probably never be really successful with women I’m afraid.
[–]TaipanZ_[🍰] 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I agree, depends how you deliver... you also can say something indirect and not in a asking way
[–]frie-with-a-tie 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Maybe move the time of the date a little bit. Tell her something like, hey is it cool for you if we meet at 2:15 (instead of 2)? That way you can check if she flakes or if she wants to meet up with you without making it sound as if you are checking if she wants to meet you.
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
The date is not set yet because she didn't tell me that she is going to come she just told me that she will check if she is free that day. So you can't say let's move it because the date is not set yet. What do you think about just texting her something then asking her in a joking about the date or something?
[–]frie-with-a-tie 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sure that should work, but I think a common mistake is overthinking it. All this playing games bullshit might or might not work. Just do it and see how the outcome will be. I think texting is a pretty stupid form of communication, but it is somewhat necessary
[–]SaucerPass22 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Go make other plans. If she gets back to you, then you can tell her you're interested but she has to do better next time. If she doesn't get back to you, then fine you've already lined something else up. Asking again just makes you look needy.
[–]yennybear888 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Soft rejection...women make it easy for guys they’re into
[–]Realityinmyhand 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If a girl is attracted to you, she will make it easy to meet and spend time with you.
[–]Glacier_Sama 7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Shes not interested dude. Dont hit her up again. On to the next lady
[–]Handle-me-timber 9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Soft rejection for sure. You can follow it up if you want but I wouldn’t wanna date her if she’s lacking that interest in the first place.
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
I might be trying to justify this because of emotions but she might forget about it cuz of the stress around the finals or something. The interest was there when we talked irl the convos were good not lacking interest from her side.
[–]Handle-me-timber 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
So you can definitely hit her up and try and get that date yeah, test to see if she’s really disinterested or if she forgot. But if she is interested and you just don’t try again, she’s gonna hit you up and ask about it anyway.
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
It's tomorrow I don't and it has been 2 days so idk if I should still ask :
[–]Handle-me-timber 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Nah. Don’t ask her about the schedule if she doesn’t bring it up first. Let it pass and ask her afterwards. You were busy anyway. Understand what I mean?
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yep I get you.I just want to know if she is interested and the best way is just to ask her if it's up or something.
[–]Doctor0z 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
When in doubt, always assume she has no interest.
[–]Eggs351 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
You could relax and wait for a response. Do something to occupy your mind.
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I am occupied but its been 2 days and I'm not sure if the right thing is to ask because it's tmrw.
[–]bobyd 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ask her. If no answer move on. Text something short and low investment, like something you would say to a friend you met hundred times
[–]redditor4206903 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Just ghost that bitch.
[–]rrepsaj13 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Bro for me, she agreed on going on a coffee date and i asked her if she prefers in the morning or afternoon, she hit me with that “i’ll let you know before because i’m a little to busy atm.”
And honestly it’s making me overthink about it too much, idk if she just didn’t wanna say no but it would’ve been nice to be straightforward and not play games you know?
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yep I relate
[–]ecish 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Idk, I have a pretty weird schedule and it takes me literally 15 seconds to look at my schedule and figure out if I’m free or not. When women say this, I just assume they’re hoping to be doing something else instead and are just using you as a backup plan.
Thank you, ur right.
[–]whatusayneggha 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
ask once. if she didnt reply. cut it off. REMEMBER: women flake all the time (reason? dont ask me, ask them.)
[–]ZakTaylor05 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If she wanted to go out with you, you would know instantly. She would know or find out immediately. If she doesn’t, you are not a priority or she doesn’t like you. Never be plan B.
[–]NottoSlimorshady 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
had something similar happen, i liked the girl and we went on a date it was pretty good, and i asked if she wanted to hangout again and she said yes and when i gave her two options i.e friday or saturday, she said i’ll let you know. Red flag because it’s a thing girls do when they want to let you down soft or they don’t like to say no, it’s like say you ask her out on tuesday, and you might hangout on friday or saturday, thursday comes and you ask her, hey so can u do friday or saturday, on the day of they will tel you oh sorry i actually have plans, which is really fucking annoying, but 1/10 times it’s true, and if they really liked u they would be like oh sorry i have plans and im super busy but we can do sunday, then there’s still hope. but to be straight up with you, in this generation all girls are the same, for my situation there was something up, she wasn’t interested in me like that, so i ended up cutting ties. GL to u tho
[–]mystylejay 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What's the point, dude?
Did she accepted the date or not?
If she did, she wanted to
If she did not, she did not want to
Delay in the aswer is...who knows? Uncertainy? Multiple dates? why do you care?
[–]Common_Goose_4001 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Shes waiting to see if something better comes up dude. It's plain and simple.
You're not her first choice
[–]iamgiantlifestyle 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yea confirm with her the night before if you haven’t heard from her, if she doesn’t respond just move on
[–]raulonastool 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
It's a soft rejection but not 100%. The ball is in her court. If you are unbothered by her "rejection" she might think about it, talk to her friends about you and then reach back out and ask if you're still free for the date. At this point your job is done. Do nothing. Make other plans for that day and if she reaches out reschedule for some other day. Your time is valuable and you need to act like it
I'm not bothered by the rejection or sad I still have plans for the day, however I'm thinking if I don't act now or ask her I will regret it. She might be too shy to tell me she is free or start a convo and the interest might be there. I know I'm overthinking a lot of stuff and you are def right about ignoring that bs but if I ask I'm still not losing anything and I will know for sure.
What do you think about that?
[–]raulonastool 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You already asked her out. She said she'll let you know. So wait for her to let you know. If you reach out beforehand it makes you come across as needy and insecure. It is a far less attractive state of mind.
You should just assume that of course she's interested in me. Ofcourse she'll reach back out. I'm a catch and hanging out with an amazing guy like me is the most fun thing she could possibly do.
If she doesn't reach back out, it's not because she's too shy. It's because she's not interested. If she does reach back out, your job as is to schedule a date so that you can get to know eachother in person.
You know what I'm retarded you're 100% right, thank you. I just realized that idk what happened.
[–]johnocomedy 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Men play checkers, women play chess. Stop trying to figure them out and just be yourself
[–]ExcitementFamous4284 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You can just ask her a day before if the date will go down. Something like "hey what about our day tomorrow?" There's nothing bad with confirming. It might be a soft rejection but she could have said it because she doesn't want to promise to a date yet before talking a little more or knowing you're a fun guy to be with. I would recommend for you to ask her if as you said the conversation was fun and she seems interested about you
[–]United-Educator853 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Man, you are overthinking a lot, just call her and keep it crisp. The conversation should be like :
you: ssup, I am a bit confused about the plan we discussed, if you are unable then tell me I will fill the gap with something from my schedule and have more time for sleep. (either she will say Yes it's on and sorry that I forgot or she will reply as follows)
She: actually I am still unclear.
Then your response should be "Ok then, let's just drop the plan, whenever you are free just give me a call and we will plan it out, Is that Cool"
This will make things clear for YOu and Her.
[–]idunahtknow -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
She could be undecided, or tried making plans with a friend who wouldn't know until the day of and she didn't want to double schedule. It really is a case by case. Best way to handle it, probably let her have a week or two, if she doesn't respond, ask again. If she doesn't respond the next time, definitely higher chances she isn't interested.
The problem is that we are gonna see each other this week bcs of mutual friends and I can't just ignore her. In person I can't just pretend that didn't happened, don't know how to handle it. Should I ask her in person when meet or should I not bring the topic and let her bring it.
[–]i-d-a-h-o -2 points-1 points0 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Honestly as a woman, women love playing head games with themselves. There's just as good a chance she's waiting for you to reach out
Really? It's strange to me that she tells me that she is gonna check if she has something up and doesn't contact me. Yo me that's a sign of rejection or lack of interest.
[–]Lotus_82 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You definitely don’t. Or at least I wouldn’t. If a woman is attracted to you and wants to spend time with you she’ll let you know, and she certainly won’t “forget” or need any type of reminder.
If she’s interested she’ll be the one initiating contact and giving you hints about the kind of evening she wants to have.
Some guys here seem not to realize that in the game of seduction there are no resounding “yes” and “no”, there are subtle hints and non verbal cues like through the e use of looks, body language, etc.
The point is in seduction communication happens in between the lines, so to speak, and that’s why it’s a communication skill that needs to be learned and worked on for a lot of inexperienced guys who are expecting clear signals with “yes” and “no” when that’s not how this game works.
[–]TaipanZ_[🍰] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Let her come to you I would say, I mean you asked her about the date and just be chill about that if she responds good if not don't ask her again.. thats how I would do it, hope it helps.. have a good day
[–]dcmathproof 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Just tell her what you are doing.... Hey, I'm going boating this Sunday.... Want to come along?
I did the same, obv not with boating and she just said I will check if I'm free...
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[–]frie-with-a-tie 13 points14 points15 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 5 points6 points7 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]Lotus_82 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TaipanZ_[🍰] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]frie-with-a-tie 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]frie-with-a-tie 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]SaucerPass22 9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]Glacier_Sama 7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Handle-me-timber 9 points10 points11 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 0 points1 point2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]Handle-me-timber 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 -1 points0 points1 point (2 children) | Copy Link
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[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]Common_Goose_4001 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]raulonastool 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 -1 points0 points1 point (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]raulonastool 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]johnocomedy 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]ExcitementFamous4284 -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]United-Educator853 -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]idunahtknow -1 points0 points1 point (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Delicious-Appeal4445 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]i-d-a-h-o -2 points-1 points0 points (1 child) | Copy Link
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