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[–]5_7pickup 23 points24 points25 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Have a beer and just talk to anybody: men or women.
I go solo to clubs 4-5 times a week in Vegas. Refer to my field reports for more info.
[–]150420throwaway 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I live in the U.K. and I’m not sure whether it’s the same as in the states :/
[–]5_7pickup 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It is.
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]600joe 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
holy shit YO HOLY SHIT dropping some fucking knowledge I gotta try this out
[–]hse7148 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ey glad to see the delt god referenced here
[–]colerobertx 8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
Definitely be social with everyone
[–]tredollasign 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Just remembered I've never danced and can literally picture myself going and not talking to anyone because my conversation skills are ass rn. I just freeze and go blank.
Fuck
[–]ApprenticeOfTheGame 7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
You can’t go in thinking you’re going to lose. First, write down five reasons why you would be a good friend for someone to have. Next, write down five reasons why you’d make a woman’s life better if you were in it. Internalize that you are an asset to anyone lucky enough to meet you. Don’t be discouraged if people don’t see it immediately. Always remember that you will win in the end.
[–]tredollasign 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
I'm so fucking boring man, I feel like I can easily be exposed as a farce once I interact with someone
"Oh he's not as confident as he actually looks."
-- cue the salty disrespect if it's a guy I'm talking to
I'm 26 and I feel like a fucking child when it comes to socializing and life experience in general. It drives me fucking crazy. It literally makes me angry how fucking bad I am at this and how impossible it feels. I'm fucking pissed off at myself. I've never been able to effectively socialize for a long period of time.
Idk what value I can offer as a friend or partner. I'm just an independent, introverted cocky fuck that works and goes to the gym. I have no interesting stories, experiences, with no friends and shit social skills to boot. It's a vicious, endless cycle.
Fml I'm already 26 and I feel so fucking overwhelmed with the two things in life that I desperately want right now: friends and girls.
[–][deleted] 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]lunaokazul 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It’s not that easy unfortunately, you say “make a small talk = success”, we think “make a small talk = how did I look? Was I weird? How badly did I fuck up? Oh this person is never gonna talk to me again” it’s a constant battle that changes everyday, one minute I could really be like “success” but the next it’d be the latter. Only way to overcome this is by exposing oneself to new uncomfortable situations like going to a bar or learning a new hobby or maybe even taking a trip alone, and trying to not care that much. Gotta remember that fucking up and laughing at yourself is humane and it’s okay to do so. And also when you feel the anxiety rising, take a deep breath and ignore the intruding thoughts and feelings. Gotta remember that they’re just that, thoughts and feelings, not the reality of things.
[–]ApprenticeOfTheGame 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
OP you gotta break the negative inner talk. Accept the place you are currently in your life. Understand that you can change it. You cannot keep beating yourself up like this and hope to make progress where you want to make progress. Take that negative inner energy, and convert it into positive active energy. Also, Todd V has a great YouTube video on how to be social titled “How to Never Run Out of Things to Say”. That is a good primer on small talk.
[–]150420throwaway 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I’m not sure if it’s the same in the UK, I’m not OP but I have the same question as him
[–]MyCityGameQuestions 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I did this for the first time tonight! I've got a lot of questions after doing this but it was an ok night! 6/10
[–]Specialist-Kick-1387 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
First of all, kudos to you for doing that, it's brave. I've never done well going solo in a club, always ending the night going home early and feeling defeated. Going solo on the streets during the day on the other hand is no issue for me.
[–]wolflion20 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Don't think of it as going solo at all. Seriously. There have been times I went out with my friends to have fun which is all you're supposed to do. Then I'll be on the dance floor with some woman if I'm lucky, and it's like my friends aren't even there at all. In fact, sometimes they get drunk and jealous and try to be funny in front of us and almost fuck things up.
[–]lunaokazul 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh to be able to go to a club alone and genuinely have fun without having to worry about anyone hurting you.. the envy..
Edit: well look at that, I forgot to write my tip.
As a socially anxious girl myself, I suggest you hit the bar first before the club. Clubs are usually packed with people and that could cause your anxiety to go into overdrive. Start small by going to a chill bar by yourself. Take a beer and just try to relax, scope the room for friendly faces, focus on your breathing if you feel your anxiety rising. I even suggest to make friends with the bartender if he seems like a cool guy to you. That could actually even help you later on with the girls (getting them drinks on the house or in a low price)
After you feel like you gained some confidence or broke some of your barriers, then go hit the club. If you go hardcore too fast, it could shut you down like it did before and make you not want to try anything new ever again. My advice, take it easy.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Alpha move tbh
[–]600joe 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I live in the best city in the USA currently for nightgame - learn to go out solo and just dance by yourself.
I've had a few nights recently where I went solo and it was some of my happiest experiences I've had in my entire life.
SOLO GAME is sometimes the best game honestly - I've been out before with older PU dudes who've been gaming for 15+ years however sometimes the skill gap is so large it negatively affects you.
[–]Nofapdeity 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Pregame
[–]Only_illegalLPT 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Get drunk and do cocaine but not too much or you'll be an asshole. The stimulant is just there so you don't look sloppy drunk.
If you turn into a coke fiend whatever you do consider another approach.
If I was doing this, which I already did but by accident, I would just get into a group and start socializing.
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[–]5_7pickup 23 points24 points25 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]150420throwaway 2 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]5_7pickup 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]600joe 4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]hse7148 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]colerobertx 8 points9 points10 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]tredollasign 5 points6 points7 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]ApprenticeOfTheGame 7 points8 points9 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]tredollasign 5 points6 points7 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]lunaokazul 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]ApprenticeOfTheGame 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]150420throwaway 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]MyCityGameQuestions 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Specialist-Kick-1387 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]wolflion20 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]lunaokazul 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]600joe 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Nofapdeity 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Only_illegalLPT 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link