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[–]datingcoachonwheels 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This scares me too, so I made you a video reply: https://youtu.be/Bn69sh5VAHE
I'd love to know what you decide for your middle ground
[–]Sandvicheater 2 points3 points4 points 9 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
For the germophobes thoughts on kissing random chicks with the risk of contracting HPV-1 aka cold sores??
[–]saffer001 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
It transmits only when the person actually has a breakout. I also have it, got it from my mother when I was a kid. It's dormant 99.99 percent of the time.
[–]kalolilo 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Not true, read up on asymptonatic viral shedding.
[–]Felonessthrowaway2 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
That's not at all true.
Oral HSV1 is most infectious when sores are present BUT can be infectious at anytime due to asymptomatic viral shedding. Here is some info on shedding rates for oral HSV1 outside of an outbreak
The HSV-1 virus can be shed in the mouth even when there are no symptoms; this occurs on anywhere from 6 percent to 30 percent of days.
http://consults.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/06/01/dating-sex-and-herpes/?_r=0
https://books.google.com/books?id=PoRB5qQXW70C&pg=PA28
--OHSV1: 9%-18%
http://www.westoverheights.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/Updated-Herpes-Book.pdf PAGE 17
[–]saffer0011 point 9 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
So that means I did give my ex a little something to remember me by after all?
[–]JE163 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Chances are you have been exposed already and either you have it and are asymptomatic or you are immune.
[–]letsgetrandy 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
First, herpes isn't that big of a deal. A lot of people have it and continue to live fairly normal lives. Sure, you don't want it if you don't have it, but it's not going to kill you. The rest should scare you much more...
When choosing partners - particularly if you're not using protection - choose people who don't appear to be obvious drug users, and who don't seem to be inclined toward poor decision making.
For example, single mothers don't like to take risks. Similarly, married women don't want to mess up and bring something back to their husbands, so they're also low risk.
But promiscuous young women who love drugs and have no intention to ever have kids? Might be good one to pass up.
[–][deleted] 9 years ago* (9 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]letsgetrandy 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I don't have it so I can't speak to how painful it is, but my understanding is that it's a bit sore during an outbreak, but not debilitating. And when there's no outbreak, there's no problem.
[–]saffer001 9 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
Oral herpes is basically asymptomatic 99.99 of the time. You only have outbreaks when your immune system is weakened. I had 2 outbreaks in the last 10 or more years. Outbreaks last like 2 weeks. As for pain, it's annoying at worst.
[–]CasualHSV 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
I have type 1 genital herpes, my initial outbreak was painful, I will probably never have another one. 80% of those with type 2 genital herpes either have no symptoms or symptoms so mild they don't notice. For the vast majority of people with herpes it really is not a big deal at all. For a small number it can be frequent, and painful and life altering.
[–][deleted] 9 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]CasualHSV 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
I'm a girl but that doesn't change the fact that I need to inform my partners. Most of my partners come from an online environment, my OKCupid profile says I carry the virus that causes herpes, and I ask if they read it and if they understand the implications. That usually opens up the conversation and I take it from there.
I would never wait until they are back at my place, or me at their place to disclose I would do it before hand. I have only had to do it once in person, he was getting handsy - I pushed him off and said I have something to tell you and I just told him straight up I have herpes - it all worked out fine.
I have had people say they are not willing to take the risk but they have all been polite about. You will also probably get rejected sometimes, try not to take it to heart, it won't happen all the time. The more confident you are the easier it gets.
edit - r/herpes and r/HSVpositive are two good places to go and ask for help with disclosure conversations and techniques.
[–][deleted] 9 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]CasualHSV 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Almost always they thank me for being honest, some have a few questions, many are already aware of herpes and have been involved with others who have had it so they understand the risks. And some say they are not prepared to take the risk.
[–]Felonessthrowaway2 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
For things like herpes, you will need to have your partners tested before sexual contact to avoid being infected. Over 80% of people with HSV2 have not been diagnosed so they wouldn't be able to warn you before sexual unless they were specifically tested for herpes since herpes testing is not a part of standard STD testing
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[–]datingcoachonwheels 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Sandvicheater 2 points3 points4 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]saffer001 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]kalolilo 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Felonessthrowaway2 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]saffer0011 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]JE163 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]letsgetrandy 1 point2 points3 points (10 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]letsgetrandy 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]saffer001 [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]CasualHSV 0 points1 point2 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]CasualHSV 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]CasualHSV 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Felonessthrowaway2 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link