Preface:

OK, for the record I'm not an AFC but real shy of a player, my game with strangers is horrible for many reasons and this whole self improvement through pickup thing has been helping me a TON. I'm shaking a lot of bad habits and learning that some are good and If I really start working I plan on getting better.

The strip club: Many people have opinions on it, and I would like to discuss mine in detail but in a different post. The point for this one is that I've been going a lot lately. The reason why I added the "for real" part is because this wasn't my first # close at the strip club but this one may be genuine, the others arent worth writing about.

The FR: Alright so last night I enter the club with my friend that takes me there and the usual foolery begins. We check on our customers, the girls check on us, we sit chill and talk when girls approach. Just a normal night that I want to save for a later post.

Now while the normal pleasantries are going on there is one stripper thats older but holds herself well and has NEVER come to our table. I've always been under the impression that she knows what we do and she doesn't like it. As a matter of fact when we first entered the club I started having a conversation about work with a young girl and she walked by and told the girl "Go make some money".

Fast forwarding to a little later I make sure to smile a little whenever she goes by me and eventually make way to the bar for a beer. While grabbing my bud light she serendipitously begins talking a to a patron next to me and pats my 'fro (a normal kino thing she'd been doing).

[Ok this is where I do what I would never have done before] I use the opportunity to frame her: I turn to the guy and say "she doesn't like me at all". Of course she qualifies by asking why I would say that and givin me another pat and smile but I continue to look at the stage and let her know that she hasn't stopped by our table at all tonight.

[I realize now by letting this frame continue for just that one more sentence gets her body language towards me] Once I felt attention I switched up a little bit and said "Yeah, I've seen you many times and you just don't seem friendly". She begins telling me how a lot of folks tell her that and that shes really a sweetheart (who isn't!?) and she tries to talk to everyone.

I try to use the hardships of the job as a sticking point [FAIL] but did it light enough to keep the subjects flowing. As a matter of fact she called me out on it! I tried to ask about how long she'd been working there and where else she'd worked and she stopped mid conversation and said something along the lines of "try harder" or "thats not interesting", "don't talk to a stripper about stripping" blah blah blah (by the way this is NOT always true). Knowing that I wasn't wrong and that she just didn't want to talk about it really helped me out, before I really would have been let down and lost the conversation (I was already struggling for a hook when I went for the questions about her job) but here's what I did instead.......

I came clean! I said something along the lines of "Yeah your right, but i'm practicing my small talk and putting myself out there and you managed to back me into a corner, besides you should understand as a sweetheart who doesn't show it just how important it is to communicate". Once I said this she prompted me, she said ask me something interesting, "when was the last time you fell?" (TAKE NOTE GUYS thats an awesome conversation starter), of course I answered and asked her the same and we had a nice conversation about falling.... (that can go many places)

I chose to use it to lead into what she wants to be when she grows up (shes VERY grown). She let me know she's going to school to study .. get this.... Sociology and Psychology! OH yeah Jung, Maslow, Freud, Milton, I mean this is what we are studying too but in a very practical sense. From here on out it was smooth sailing, she's definitely a stripper (manipulator, controller, had a guy pay her rent but wouldn't let him hold her hand, and probably a real freak just like me), smart as a whip and sexy as hell but I was the guy she'd never met before... "You just don't find people to talk to about this stuff" "Wow, we have to hang out" "Oh my god your so different" "Lets go get some coffee"

I never gave her a dime or a dollar, and I even refused to take her number the first two times but she was so adamant even though she won't hookah with me (she doesn't like nicotine) but, fingers crossed I'll get to play mid-game with a gorgeous stripper either today or tomorrow.

I'll take any advice anyone wants to give, I'm horrible at physical escalation and the stripper thing may make her weary of certain things.

Lessons learned: I need better story telling, bridges, and games so that once i'm in a conversation I can keep it going if the natural progression dies. I need to escalate physically more, and I don't have to worry about making a girl upset or grossed out because I never intend it and I can recover as long as I do NOT dwell on the mistakes and keep the conversation on that topic.

Edit: One more lesson... TALK to the girl! Even if I have to engineer the meeting because I may not have to engineer anything else once I get that started.