Going through a phase where I can’t approach

ImpossibleBritches · 2025-04-19T06:27:25+00:00

I was just about to give a little advice but then noticed that you'd "been in the game" for 16 years. That's a red flag for something, but im not sure what.

Don't take it personally but I reckon that if you've "been in the game" for that long, then something is wrong with you. And would put money on it being related to your current incapacity for cold approaching.

There's a bunch of possible (at least semi-)healthy paths through learning this stuff. And all of them end after a few short years.

After a few years - maybe 3-5, a healthy man would have taken the lessons he's learnt and be integrating them into other parts of his life.

You still end up continuing to learn about sex/romance/seduction/whatever. But the lessons become much more subtle and are more related to how you are developing as a person. There's only so much you can learn about routines and basic attraction psychology.

But if it might be useful, and you haven't taken the above personally, then I'll respond with the advice that I was initially going to give (which you either already know or should know anyway):

You actually know what's held you back. You just haven't allowed yourself to be conscious of it.

Give yourself time to discover it, and don't judge yourself for not approaching. Take some time out for sitting or going for walks. There's something going on for you that is holding you back, and only your intuition can tell you what it is.

You need to not rush the process of that discovery though.

ImpossibleBritches · 2025-04-19T06:28:41+00:00

Also, I think your kind of answered the question yourself by talking about tying your ego to it.

You are attached to outcome and not in the moment.

epimpstyle · 2025-04-19T08:18:01+00:00

I go out a lot but just end up taking no action.

You've answered your own question. Without action, what do you expect to happen? It's like wanting bread but going to a grocery store and just looking around instead of asking for it—the vendor will never guess what you want, and you’ll only come across as a weirdo.

Why aren’t you doing anything? Why aren’t you taking action? It is about something that holds you back and you don't feel in the mood., you don't have energy, is not a good moment or you simply don't know what to do? (or maybe both?)

KoleSekor · 2025-04-19T15:04:24+00:00

You're subconsciously replaying all the rejections you've had inside your brain and body which is causing you to freeze up in fear.

Western-Month-3877 · 2025-04-19T15:51:23+00:00

Or maybe you’re just getting older? like you subconsciously feel that the girls or the women you see during your night game are getting younger.

Or in the recent past you can’t relate to what they were talking about? You know Lana Del Rey, but they talk about Chappell Roan.

Your post kinda remind me of my old friend. He’s like the first gen of PUA who knew Mistery personally. But one day last year he told me he feels like the world keeps moving at a faster speed while he feels like he’s getting stuck in the past. He can’t barely relate to anything anymore.

Chicagoj1563 · 2025-04-20T16:39:01+00:00

What’s the conversation in your head when you find you can’t approach? You’re at the bar, then what happens?

Title	Going through a phase where I can’t approach
Author	MineDesperate2920
Upvotes	1
Comments	21
Date	April 19, 2025 6:09 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1k2podk/going_through_a_phase_where_i_cant_approach/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/going-through-a-phase-where-i-cant-approach.1550021 https://theredarchive.com/post/1550021

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