Help: Should I not be F-Closing on First Date?

HappyJerk · 2014-02-05T14:51:19+00:00

I know this is going to sound really really really shitty/stupid but is it bad that I'm getting bored with this now?

No its normal.

The point of all this (IMO) is to find a genuinely cool girl that you emotionally connect with and enjoy spending time with. Now that you've mastered the basics, go for that instead of the other thing.

puaCurveBall · 2014-02-05T19:51:46+00:00

This is a deep psychological problem not specifically related to pickup.

The problem is that society has sold you a lie, and that lie has two parts:

Having sex with new women is the most amazing thing ever and will make you happy
It is hard to have sex with new women

Most guys believe the lie, suck with women and always just fantasize about "how great it would be" if he were great with women. I suspect you were at one point like this.

Now, you have personal experiences showing you that it is both easy to have sex with women, and that it doesn't bring some sort of instant happiness with it (just like if you actually got a billion dollars or any other fantasy you have).

So now you feel cognitive dissonance, because your experiences are at odds with what you believed. You still want to chase that idea of happiness, so obviously you must be doing something "wrong" because you aren't getting the expected result.

You will never find happiness through external things like money / sex / women, you find it through an introspective internal change.

So you have to update your expectations to more closely match reality. Stop thinking that it is hard to have sex with women (and you'll stop thinking its too "Easy"), and stop thinking you can use sex with women to solve any issues or find fulfillment in it.

This basically means you'll have to set new goals for yourself and really get introspective about what you want in life and what you value.

AskmeIfIamFapping · 2014-02-05T13:43:00+00:00

Stop using tinder. tinder is for casual sex. I'm not saying it's a bad thing but you are clearly bored of casual sex. Start day game to make things more interesting.also date interesting people.raise your standards. Dont date someone who comes off as boring and not fun but is d2f

Also make sure that you get something out of your dates. You are clearly not an AFC so you are just not trying to get laid. Try different dates like museums if your into that or hiking or something else you wanna try out. Might not always work depending on ur game but it will definitely lead to new experiences.

atreestump1 · 2014-02-05T14:55:34+00:00

I don't think it's bad to get bored of this... I remember watching one of Ross Jeffries' videos, where he said.. "The pickier you are the more choices you'll have" it's been a method I've kept ever since...

I had a buddy when I was in Ft. Bragg, who was SO outstanding with picking up women (he was a natural, no training it was just fluent for him) He stole many women from me, I saw him go through 3 different women a night, in a 5 day week.

Long story short, he's gay now, because he got so bored with women.. I'm not sure how relevant that story is, but it is interesting. .

TheHeadHunterr · 2014-02-05T16:00:54+00:00

You meet girls online and then complain that they are easy... HELLO, online chicks ARE easy, they are putting it all out there. That's like saying, you're tired of buffets because there's just too much food, then STOP going to buffets.

I tore through TONS of women online and it got boring, 90% of them were all first night lays & half of those I never even took out, they just came over. I don't do the online thing anymore for just that reason.

I discovered quickly that I valued ANY woman I met OFFline more than EVERY woman I met ONline.

You want to be challenged, stop gathering low hanging fruit, go after the good stuff.

ItsNotAScam · 2014-02-05T13:46:31+00:00

I strongly advise not using tinder (or okcupid even). Day game is the best route for getting women because that way the situation is always under your control and you don't need to worry about the insane amount of competition ripping your target away from you.

Title	Help: Should I not be F-Closing on First Date?
Author	boredrightnowx99
Upvotes	5
Comments	23
Date	February 5, 2014 1:16 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1x2vau/help_should_i_not_be_fclosing_on_first_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/help-should-i-not-be-f-closing-on-first-date.1304526 https://theredarchive.com/post/1304526

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