How Can I stop getting overly emotional whenever a girl doesn't text back?

ksinha1929 · 2014-01-01T20:22:07+00:00

I understand how you feel, good tactic is to do this with multiple girls so you're not necessarily waiting on "one" to reply. It's basically keeping your mind occupied with a new task so you don't even have time to overanalyze and worry about a past text conversation.

throwawaysundayz · 2014-01-01T21:55:17+00:00

Yes, multiple girls is good, but even if you DON'T have multiple girls in rotation, that's no excuse for owning a positive attitude toward texting.

Try this: (I know it's often repeated advice but it needs to spread more) Text her, then put your phone down and do something else. Set it and forget it like fucking Ron Popeil. Do other things. I text girls when I'm at work, or playing video games or watching a movie, etc. situations where I am not going to drop everything and reply immediately. When I see that they have texted back, I don't immediately pick up the phone and start texting them. You text her back when YOU want to.

And no, it's not the petty "she took an hour to text you back so YOU take an hour to text back" move either. It is simply breaking free from the anticipation of text messages.

kingcal · 2014-01-02T04:03:09+00:00

Well, you need to be less invested in these girls. You meet them once and get their number and start thinking about how great it'd be to go on a date and maybe do some kissing and then some fucking and maybe even start a real relationship and then... It's just a runaway train. You barely know this girl. Don't build her up any more than she deserves.

In this particular case, the texts were weak. You sent her essentially a meaningless mass message for a holiday. You got the polite response you were obliged to. You made a joke. She said "lol". That's not a response. That's an "I don't have anything to say because I'm not interested in talking to you." You asked a very open-ended, weak, and indirect question to set up a date. Don't ask. Tell. Say "Let's get coffee at X on Y at Z o'clock."

YetzirahToAhssiah · 2014-01-01T21:04:17+00:00

You know, I had this question before. I guess over time I cared less and less, and just accepted that flakes happen and don't matter that much.

turbopork · 2014-01-01T21:35:18+00:00

Girls (well, people) in general are flakey. Even girls themselves can't explain why. The sooner you can wrap your head around that fact, the easier it will be for you.

And yes, keep multiple girls on the wire, that seriously does help keep your mind occupied.

XDVI · 2014-01-01T22:23:51+00:00

I recently did this.

I was pretty bummed for a couple days (this chick was pretty cool), but after a few days you'll get over it.

Best bet is to stop talking to her until she re-initiates with you.

2014-01-01T22:25:31+00:00

One thing that pisses me off so much is just random silences, and in whatsapp i can see they've been on-line. They could be busy. Some people reply sometime after though.

Patience must be tamed, like many other said just accept the fact that you made a mistake(find out what) which turned her away or she's just not that interested. She might reply after a while.. so you could take it from there?

sedditforthewin · 2014-01-01T23:55:29+00:00

Meditate.
Go through it a lot.
Get more girls.

2014-01-02T01:05:47+00:00

Imagine her perception of the message you sent. Would you feel compelled to respond to the message you sent if you were her? You're thinking about things a bit mechanically and ignoring the emotional state which you must evoke in order to create attraction- if she's attracted to you, she'll want to see you, but find out what she wants to do with you. Make her think about the idea of spending time with you as being a fulfilling experience. You got this bro.

JohnCooperWrites · 2014-01-02T01:47:47+00:00

Just don't give a shit, but that only comes from experience. Experience will give you the feeling of abundance. When you got options, you don't give shit.

Btw, getting a woman's number means nothing. If they don't answer when you want to ask her out that means she was never interested in you sexually or maybe she met another guy.

BLParks12 · 2014-01-02T03:33:11+00:00

I think the answer also depends on what you want. Do you want to play the game? Because that is what she (and most of these women that make us wait) is playing. If you want to play the game, then treat it like the game it is and make her do the waiting first; don't seem too eager. Don't answer every one of her texts. Make her be the one to initiate from time to time and don't text back right away. The goal of this game is to be the one with the upper hand (ie the one who is making the other person sweat waiting for the text). But most guys don't like playing the game, so don't engage. If the girl starts messing with you like this realize that she is not worth your time and go looking for someone who is worth your time. Most importantly, don't EVER send multiple texts in a row. This goes for either goal you have. My suggestion is to forget the game playing and move on if she doesn't text you back. This is not the kind of girl you want to hang with anyway because she will play games with you every chance she gets; and you will NOT have fun.

2014-01-02T05:20:08+00:00

be emotional. express it. thats game dawg

2014-01-02T08:26:41+00:00

[permanently deleted]

2014-01-03T10:50:36+00:00

By asking out do you mean like "wanna get some coffee Monday afternoon?"

rusty84 · 2014-01-01T20:23:52+00:00

Today I text her to wish her a happy new year

Don't do that — it comes off as pathetic and needy. She would have to be more interested in you than you are in her for that to work. Do you think Brad Pitt would do that? Next time shoot her a call too.

they make me feel frustrated and unattractive.

You haven't been rejected enough. After I was rejected about 10-15 times, I just stopped caring, its like I genuinely forgot I asked them out, and I just didn't care.

worms_to_mooch_sex · 2014-01-01T20:29:03+00:00

Ooh I know the answers to this one:

1 you didn't make them work for it, proving your value. make them send 2 messages sometimes before you answer--basically you failed to do this before they did it to you, you did 1 - 1 - 1 - 1 too early on. You had a chance to give the impression that you have things in your life don't don't really give a shit but are just sending "Happy New Year" to all the random people in your phone. Instead you sprung on her. A better chance would have been an ongoing, spread out, I don't give a shit back and forth. After going on a while she'll be more inclined to say "fuck it, maybe this will be fun" You shouldn't worry about when the date is, just have fun texting her, don't be too available, and finally it sounds like your invitation could have been toned down slightly to be more like you're gonna do it with or without her instead of coming across like an almost formal sounding date

2 in the case when you really are getting emotional because they don't answer, the obvious answer is to have more girls to text to, then you will naturally come across like a guy with a life and they can keep your mind occupied. she's not your wife. maybe you should turn off message notifications for girls in this stage at least, just check your phone when you feel like it, and make sure it's' not often like you're some kind of anxious rodent or husband afraid his wife will be mad if he doesn't answer within 30 minutes.

Title	How Can I stop getting overly emotional whenever a girl doesn't text back?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	10
Comments	42
Date	January 1, 2014 8:09 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1u6cht/how_can_i_stop_getting_overly_emotional_whenever/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-can-i-stop-getting-overly-emotional-whenever-a.1363816 https://theredarchive.com/post/1363816

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