I just read another post on /r/seduction where a guy wrote stuff about "how to stop being so fucking needy". That post was amazingly in-depth, but incredibly complicated, so i just wanted to share my own strategy and mindset with you guys about removing all neediness. A much simpler one, but very effective nonetheless.
It's all about your mindset, really. The thing I learned and personally do to remove all neediness from my interactions with girls, is that i go into the interaction with the mindset of "Whatever happens - happens".
Let me explain. Most guys when they go out they have a certain goal in mind - to get laid or find a girlfriend! Having that goal will fuck up your whole evening, because you will be subconsciously imposing that goal onto every girl that you interact with during your evening. As a person, you can only control yourself - you can't control others! Other people are going to do whatever the hell they were going to do anyway, and you can't change that. That's why having a goal that involves someone else is incredibly counterproductive! The girl will sense that you have an agenda, that you want something from her - and she will be right, because you DO!
That's why going out with the mindset of "fuck it, whatever happens - happens" is incredibly liberating. You will be interacting with a ton of girls when you go out:
1 - If any interaction ends in a hook-up, date, etc - fucking amazing! 2 - If it ends in nothing but a friendly conversation - even better - because you can make new friends like that, take her phone number for later use to expand your social circle and so on! Or even because having a friendly conversation is actually NICE and enjoyable, because we are all people and it's better than sitting home alone! 3 - If your interaction ends up with a totally brutal rejection or she screams at you out loud or slaps you, or whatever other incredibly, exaggeratedly bad thing that you can imagine happens - it's perfectly fine too! - because you will get a lot of experience out of that, gain more reference points to your interactions, get a chance to calibrate yourself for LATER! All your bad interactions will eventually make you better, that's how you LEARN. 4 - If your interaction ends up with you getting killed - what the fuck were you even doing? Snap out of it, get back to the real world, no one ever got killed trying to pickup a girl, unless she was simultaneously in the embrace of a huge redneck with a shotgun called Bubba, stop making up random outcomes or excuses not to talk to girls!
You see, with this mindset, every interaction is great and every outcome is agreeable, because you get something good out of all of them (ignore the 4th one, you weirdo). And if you convince your mind that you actually do feel like "fuck it, whatever happens happens", you will notice that you will never again be needy with girls and they will be that much more attracted to you.
Now, actually convincing yourself of this and getting into this mindset is the hard part... I'd write more on how to do it, but i don't wanna write up a whole novel, since the subject is incredibly vast.
Hope this helps some of you, it certainly helps me. Oh and i have a dating blog.
Peace!
EDIT That thing above can be called being outcome-independent! Oh, and if mindsets are too theoretical, a PRACTICAL way to deal with this would be to tease girls during your interactions with them, because teasing implies to a girl that you already have enough attention from other women; enough options, enough sex as well as confidence in yourself that you can afford to take risks with her! It shows that you aren't taking her or the interaction too seriously. Needy men or men of lower status would never playfully tease a girl because they would never risk of offending her - for them that would mean rejection. So just incorporate playful-cocky teases into your interactions and you will never be perceived as needy. GIRLS LOVE TO BE TEASED and find guys who know how to tease them incredibly attractive EDIT
[–]_kang18 14 points15 points16 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]jefffffffff 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Chinm4 points [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Rainbow-Hater 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]saulisdating[S] 6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]SmoothPrimal 5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]SurelyOPwillDeliver 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]saulisdating[S] 3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]JMSZ 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]saulisdating[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]VDKay 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]saulisdating[S] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]7yphoid 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]saulisdating[S] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]fortheloveofscience_ 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link