Title probably sounds stupid but I after thinking about my failures I realize my mistake has been trying to chase women. I only got dates when I stopped looking and trying.

So I was wondering what can I do to improve my success without looking or trying.

 

I have trouble getting dates and I've never even had a girlfriend despite being 25 so I was wondering what am I doing wrong?

 

So I was thinking maybe it's because I'm on the Autism spectrum? Maybe it's because I'm Black but don't fit the stereotypes? Maybe I'm just not getting out enough and just plain bad luck is ruining opportunities when I do go out? But I think maybe I'm over thinking things. Maybe my main issue is I have an habit of chasing girls that don't want me and it always fails.

 

After thinking about it I realize I've done quite a bit of chasing but no success and when I do get dates it's never the result of chasing someone. For me I meet women when I'm not trying to. Unfortunately it is super rare, random, and unpredictable just up to luck and being at the right place at the right time. People talk about confidence or game but I don't see how that affects anything. Like I've been rejected plenty of times even when I'm feeling completely confident and then I'm shocked at the rejection.

Some people are good at chasing but for me it never works out. This is probably why online dating is so bad for guys due to online dating dynamics you are essentially chasing these girls.

 

Anyway an example of me getting a date:

I'm riding this super slow elevator to the top floor of a building and the only other person on the elevator with me is this attractive Asian woman carrying a delicious looking plate of food in the elevator with me.

So being bored and trying not to seem awkward I randomly decide to strike up a conversation asking her about the food in her plate. Even though she was cute I wasn't trying to get a date, a number of anything I was legit hungry AF though since I hadn't eaten all day and that plate wasn't helping.

By the time I reached my floor I somehow ended up with a number and plans for a date at a nearby restaurant, though she insisted on paying for both of us to my surprise. While we didn't end up in a relationship I did end up with a friend.

 

An example of chasing and failing:

A few years ago I was in college taking a programming course and I met this Black woman she was super sexy. She had a really cute voice too so I was thinking man I need to get with her.

So I tried to be friends with her and I found out she was struggling in class so I offered to basically give her free tutoring and at the time I thought she was interested in me. I tried to ask her if she wanted to do anything outside of class like hang out or watch a movie but every time she had some sort of excuse about being busy. I was so thirsty I bought it too.

Unfortunately after the semester she never wanted to talk to me again.

 

So I was wondering how can I increase my luck? Especially since now I'm out in the "real world" with a full time job so meeting women is now a lot harder than it was in college.