So to start. I had a few successes on Tinder, yet nothing really stood the test of time and right now I am so fucking tired with the whole dating apps thing. It's so dissapointing in so many aspects. I don't think I am an unatractive guy, I get a fair bit of of matches. I do cool things, I play concerts from time to time (Im a jazz musician), I dance and go to dance parties (dancing is my hobby and I am pretty confident about my skiills) I work an IT job and make good money. I also think I am quite a social person, a bit timid at start, but I really do enjoy meeting new people, be it girls or dudes just for the sake of talking and having a good time.

On Tinder from lets say 30 matches in a week I am actually interested in 10, from these 10, I'll get answers from 4, from these 4 I'll arrange a date with maybe 2, from the these 2 one will come, and most of the time, I will not feel the vibe or she won't and all this dating work will really go to nothing.

Because of my dissapoinment with Tinder this over a year ago I decided I need to learn cold approach. Watched some videos on yt. Yet anytime I try to appoach in public I just can't. What's wierd is that a couple times I have approached girls during the summer, but it was always a festival or a party. I also have no problems with asking a girl to dance, but when it comes to escalating to something more it is always very hard for me.

I feel that I just really need to learn cold approach, just because of the sheer number of girls I pass each time in public transport (I live in a big city). Yet for example today when one entered the tram I was in, I was like "noo she's with a friend, I can't approach her now, it's too hard". Her friend got of on the next stop, "Nah I can't talk in the tram, all the people around will hear as talking". When it came to my stop, she actually left the tram, and all the excuses went away yet.....

I just couldn't

I don't understand that completely because everytime I did approach a couple girls on parties in the summer, it was always hard, but the moment we started talking all the stress completely dissapeared. Even if the interaction didn't go well and I was ignored or told she's not interested I was super happy about myself. So there is nothing to fear. Yet even though I know it, it is just completely impossible for me to approach, everytime I feel like theres a rock down in my stomach that keeps me in place. And I don't understand that. Did you guys go through something like this? How did you manage to get through this? What a can I do? I really want to change that. Sorry for the vent, but I really really tried many times over more than a year but I always find some excuses or wait too much and the occasion passes. I also live in a country that it's quite unpopular to approach randoms in public, thus I don't really have friends who do that, so I am alone in my, so far, unsuccessfull quest.