What exactly do you do on a first date?

WhyAmIEvenHereOMG · 2014-05-22T08:44:23+00:00

You really do just jump right in. If you're seated I'd jump right in by putting the hand on the thigh. If you're walking around just fucking go for it.

You have to realize if this girl is on a date with you, she likes you. She wants you to hold her hand and do this shit. Even if she's not giving overt signs. We all try and play cool and act uninterested.

And if she doesn't want to, why the hell would she be hanging out with you alone on a date? Just cut it off and drive home happy you saved yourself time.

1upac · 2014-05-22T04:32:37+00:00

This has worked well for me when timed right: Right after you both laugh over something (especially something that increases sexual tension, like something awkward) look her straight in the eyes and take a a deeper breath.

More often then not she will lean in.

2014-05-22T10:36:26+00:00

You can start kino by also taking control of the date. Say you've finished your coffee, then you can say 'lets go for a walk'. Then you can guide her with your hand on her back, or take her hand at that point.

joshsway · 2014-05-22T16:34:20+00:00

I wrote a few articles about this topic. A couple principles I use, depending on the date. A couple are "Varying the pace" and "Value overload" (if I think I am "out of the girls league"). In terms of escalation, I wrote about that here: https://www.joshsway.com/articles/view/how-to-escalate-on-a-date

The basic idea for escalation that I use is: eye contact -> touching -> more, but there's more detail in the article above.

Regarding the other principles which are a little more "advanced"

Varying the pace: https://www.joshsway.com/articles/view/vary-the-pace

Value overloading: https://www.joshsway.com/articles/view/value-overloading

Hope these help.

Terror1046 · 2014-05-22T22:55:05+00:00

Just go for it: Make eye contact, don't breakt it-> Kiss.

frankiejholden · 2014-05-23T00:13:33+00:00

Youve got to be a touchy dude from the beginning. That is - you put your hand on her hand or her arm to make a point or to tell her something nice, you playfully give her a push (into an object) like you would to a little brother - so she has to work to avoid running into it, you kiss her on the cheek when you first meet her --- basically, you find as many non-threatening (although sexual) ways to touch her as possible, so when you go to hold her hand (preferably youre sitting when you do this anyway) its not that big a deal. edit: the kiss on the other hand is a little harder - but as long as she KNOWS YOU ARE INTERESTED, she has probably already thought about kissing you.

Haptic_Affinity · 2014-05-22T14:58:20+00:00

Yes, you really do "jump right in" as you put it. Currently it's not natural to you, so you need to make it natural, which is done by practice and experience, there is no way around it. YOU have to make all the moves, because women are the passive gender and despite how much they want it or are receptive to it, they will usually never initiate, or even escalate to the next level once started.

I assume your fear is due to fear of loss, as in, fearing that she won't like it and you'd lose her from moving too fast. She obviously likes you enough to be out with you, so push the physical boundaries as much as you want. I'm here to tell you that is the best way to lose any woman.

Being willing to push it shows that you are outcome independent - you WANT her but you don't NEED her. That is attractive to a woman, and that is the mentality you want to cultivate - you are doing whatever you want and showing your true desires and intent, while being perceptive to resistance (which actually also shows social acumen).

Title	What exactly do you do on a first date?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	18
Comments	12
Date	May 22, 2014 4:26 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/266lsx/what_exactly_do_you_do_on_a_first_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/what-exactly-do-you-do-on-a-first-date.1295033 https://theredarchive.com/post/1295033

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