Imagine yourself as a deep lake. The outer situation of your life and whatever happens there, is the surface of the lake. Sometimes calm, sometimes windy and rough, according to the cycles and seasons. Deep down, however, the lake is always undisturbed. You are the whole lake, not just the surface, and you are in touch with your own depth, which remains absolutely still. You don't resist change by mentally dinging to any situation. Your inner peace does not depend on it.

A man without self-esteem, confidence and peace will get affected deep down by any stimulus on the surface. Work on that before anything else.

Start by reading The Power of Now.