Child support advice.

heckruler · 2019-07-31T08:33:37+00:00

So... It's not 50/50. It's more like 5/12th. If she taking care of the kid more than you, that gets expensive, and you likely owe her some cash. Even with healthcare and a phone.

Do the math. There's a worksheet available through most states. Mine gives credit for healthcare and such. If there's an imbalace, make it right. I honestly don't know what would happen if it goes to court.

And do what you can to come to an agreement about how to handle taxes and future work travel.

azskaht · 2019-07-31T14:36:26+00:00

I also learned that agreeing to no child support in the divorce is not enforceable. I took on the student loan debt in return for her agreeing to no support (we are 50/50 but I had them two extra days last year and I pay for all the extras like cell phones, camps, healthcare etc) and judge gave her support despite the divorce agreement and would not consider revisiting the student loan debt, even though there decree stated clearly that the only reason father was taking on the debt was because mother agreed to not prefer any cold support.

I learned child support is always considered fluid.

Lost-in-Ct · 2019-08-01T14:10:06+00:00

Most of the commenters hit on it, but the short of it is that child support is never final and can always be re-visited. Two parents who agree can do what they want, but child support disagreements always go back to court.

lord_dentaku · 2019-08-01T16:30:09+00:00

Who gets to claim the child in taxes is determined by the IRS and is based off of who the child spent more nights at. Your ex can wave it, so that you can claim your daughter, but if your ex doesn't you can't claim your daughter. The IRS also doesn't care what is in your decree, but if your decree did state your ex had to wave her right to claim the dependent then you would have recourse with the courts. Basically, if the intent is that you have 50/50 and you want to claim her every other year than you need to figure out a schedule that doesn't negatively affect your daughter and ensures you actually have her for half the overnights.

AspirinTheory · 2019-07-31T06:28:08+00:00

Divorced Dad in CA here. I just got through 14 months of extensive litigation with my exwife over child support issues, and it cost a lot.

I’m very sure you cannot waive the obligation of child support. Even if the two of you agreed to it, it’s very very likely to be entirely unenforceable. As I recall, the right of support is to the child, not to the mom, and the State emphasizes that the first and most important obligation is for the child to be supported by both parents. The mom absolutely has the right to ask for support and you absolutely have the obligation. Sorry.

Since you have her half and half, the courts will likely order a rotating order of days like 3-2-3 on and off between the two of you or some other calculation system you’re both happy with. You can ask for the court to determine how child-support add-ons are split; it will likely be the pro-rata share of your combined income, and you can ask for her fair reimbursement of cell phone bills + health insurance premium costs to cover her.

You have little to fight against it unless for some reason you don’t think it’s your kid. You can ask the court to have the parties submit to a paternity test if you have any real doubts, but Courts frown upon false paternity requests when you know it’s your kid.

If you and your ex are decently amicable, hire a paralegal to work through the process of determining everything except for support dollars and the splitting of child support add-ons; you can then go to DCSS (Department of Child Support Services) and jointly file all your paperwork, let them calculate support and percentages, and then you both appear in court and both agree on the record (under oath) that the agreement is fair.

The court Could still modify things but you will have saved yourselves from insane attorneys fees.

Also note that the collection of child support can and is usually RETROACTIVE so be prepared for the first month payment to your ex to be big.

Good luck.

Jamcamleh · 2019-07-31T15:07:04+00:00

Thanks. It works out that my daughter stays with her about 30 days more a year because of the normal schedule. The schedule that she made in the beginning. She makes about 30% more than me, has $750 in income every month from renting a room out at her house and gets a disbursement from her late fathers retirement every month. She owns a business though and can deduct about half her business income. I am salaried and always pay her mother half of everything she purchases for our daughter as far as clothes, fees and stuff for school. In the end I know she has more liquid income than I do. She takes my daughter on trips to Hawaii and Japan, shit I could never afford unless I saved for 2 years. I guess it’s just the unknown of what the courts will do.

wescowell · 2019-07-31T15:48:38+00:00

On our divorce agreement doesn’t outline who gets to deduct the child year after year, my bad.

You lose. she gets the deduction automatically.

BUT is does say that my ex will not pursue child or spousal support after the divorce is final.

You lose again. This language is unenforceable as to child support. It is against public policy for parents to agree to forego child support and the agreement impacts a 3d party (the child) who has a right to vitiate the "agreement."

Consult a lawyer, not reddit.

Title	Child support advice.
Author	Jamcamleh
Upvotes	2
Comments	7
Date	July 31, 2019 3:26 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/ck2qvw/child_support_advice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/child-support-advice.819350 https://theredarchive.com/post/819350

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