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Withholding Sex as a Form of Punishment

kanuk876

December 11, 2008

23 upvotes

/r/MensRights

http://divorcesupport.about.com/od/abusiverelationships/tp/Withholding-Sex.htm

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Post Information

Title	Withholding Sex as a Form of Punishment
Author	kanuk876
Upvotes	23
Comments	49
Date	December 11, 2008 1:24 PM UTC (17 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/7it76/withholding_sex_as_a_form_of_punishment/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/withholding-sex-as-a-form-of-punishment.1055852 https://theredarchive.com/post/1055852

Comments

[–]kanuk876[S,🍰] 4 points5 points6 points 17 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

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[–]lynn 1 point2 points3 points 17 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]hopeless_case 1 point2 points3 points 17 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link

I just don't think that "right" can be applied to something that someone else has to provide

I think you have a right to expect other people to follow through on promises they've exchanged with you. That's a valid use of the word 'right'. It's really the right not to be defrauded.

As regards people who get into a relationship with an emotionally abusive fuckup, I find it interesting that you consider it a moral failing to get into such relationship but not to be the emotional abuser.

You don't consider than an emotional abuser is doing something morally wrong?

I do agree with you that if one person is up-front about not being interested in sex, the other person that marries them can't claim a broken promise.

I think the scenario being explored in the article was different, though. In that scenario, one party starts withholding sex sometime after the marriage starts, as a general means of controlling the other person.

I find that morally offensive behavior. I don't think that's an honest or decent way to treat someone.

[–]lynn 1 point2 points3 points 17 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

I find it interesting that you consider it a moral failing to get into such relationship but not to be the emotional abuser.

I was focused on the person not doing the abusing, so I can see why you might have thought I intended to imply that emotionally abusing somebody is not morally wrong, but I didn't. (Edit: If I'd considered the abuser I would have assumed it was obvious.) Also, I didn't say or imply that I thought it was a moral failing to get into an emotionally abusive relationship -- I said it might be said to be.

As for the rest, fair enough, except it has been my experience that there are generally at least a few indications that someone might renege on promises or pull shit like withholding sex. Generally people who consider their partners ends in themselves rather than means to their own ends do not treat them this way.

[–]hopeless_case -1 points0 points1 point 17 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

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