Cold Approach

The most effective way to learn game is to Cold Approach. This is because when you cold approach you’re “thrown into the deep end of the pool.” You’re swimming in pure experience. You’re confronting the ‘dragon of chaos.’* The most effective way to learn anything is to expose yourself to it in great degrees. If you consistently cold approach, you will quickly learn game, and the other minor aspects of game will be easier to conquer.

When I was a kid I got the Nintendo game “Mike Tyson’s Punch Out” and I memorised the code to skip straight to Mike Tyson: 007-373-5963. I never bothered to fight the other boxers. I jumped into the deep end of the pool and went straight for the dragon of chaos: Mike Tyson. It took countless sessions to finally beat Mike Tyson but when I could beat him consistently, the other boxers in the game were even easier to beat. This is what Cold Approach is like. It’s like jumping straight into the ring with Mike Tyson. But, as always, even though I can beat Tyson, if I’m caught off guard for half a second he’ll knock me out.

Cold Approach is effective precisely because you fail and get rejected. Being rejected by beautiful women is when you learn game’s greatest lessons. It’s in getting beat by Mike Tyson that I learned how to beat him. When you cold approach you will get rejected repeatedly, but just like Mike Tyson’s Punch Out, you have many lives, and eventually you start to learn strategy. You learn what you did, that you shouldn’t have done. And you learn what you didn’t do that you should have done.

When you Cold Approach you’re experiencing game in a heightened fashion. When a Cold Approach goes bad, you experience your failure with tremendous intensity. You became deeply aware of your insecurity, neediness and nervousness. Many guys give up. However, after a bad cold approach you can learn from the interaction and see all the ways you lacked imagination and improvisation. I once cold approached a stunning woman in NYC and a few seconds in the approach she said “You’re reeeaally jumpy.” I didn’t realise it until she told me, but I was nervously shaking. She left like a bat out of hell! I’m a little embarrassed by that story, but I’m also proud of it because it taught me a vital lesson: keep my body calm and open. Now, I’m always aware of my body during a Cold Approach and I keep it calm as a cucumber. If I hadn’t approached that woman that day, I wouldn’t have learned that lesson. Anyway, the point is when you cold approach and experience the pain of rejection in such a heightened fashion, those painful lessons are burned into your body and soul forever. You will do better in your next cold approach.

And guess what? Sometimes a cold approach goes well! A cold approach that goes well is one of the most exhilarating things in life. A good cold approach is also experienced in heightened intensity. During a good cold approach the atmosphere between you and the woman is electric. You become hyper-aware of her. You feel her attraction to you. It’s palpable. She feels your attraction to her. Everything is calm. Your breathing, your movements, your words. You’re smooth as a cat. You’re confident as fuck. You’re Rico Suave up in this bitch. Time slows down. You’re in eternity. Thirty seconds feels like 30 minutes. The exquisite moments of a great cold approach can be sexier than sex. Just like a bad cold approach, a good cold approach will teach you game at a heightened intensity. Your body and soul will remember what it experienced in a good cold approach and will learn to act accordingly in future cold approaches.

This is an example of a good Cold Approach. Look at how calm his body is and how slow he talks.

The experience during a Cold Approach is difficult to articulate, but what’s important to know is that YOUR GUT learns from the experience. Cold Approaches teaches you game at a guttural level. An instinctual level. It’s not something you can easily apprehend with your mind. The more you cold approach, the more your body knows how to act. Soon you won’t have to think about it, and you set yourself up for the best possible outcome on every cold approach. It becomes instinctual, habitual. You become so smooth that your cold approaches tend to look more like chance encounters or meet-cutes. But you have to be repeatedly rejected to get to that level of understanding. I had to get beat by Mike Tyson many times before I could consistently knock him out.

Found here.