She regrets it: “feels miserable”

Wrath_of_Trump · 2018-05-16T03:11:30+00:00

It's unacceptable that she lays her shitty feelings about her decision onto you, but you can't make her own her decision because reminding her that she's an adult will just piss her off.

If you're going to regret every good time you have, then I'm not your type

ricoue · 2018-05-16T06:25:01+00:00

You got screenshots of texts of her flirting with you and stuff? Better take them now if you don't

-StupidFace- · 2018-05-16T02:37:54+00:00

she feels like she made a mistake sleeping with you.....just drop it and move on. No response.

360_no_scope_upvote · 2018-05-16T03:16:51+00:00

Go full beta and drop out of this race, this girl is fucked in the head.

BeeBopJoe · 2018-05-16T02:58:15+00:00

What do you want out of this chick?

MattyAnon · 2018-05-16T10:01:47+00:00

NEVER ADMIT ANYTHING.

You don't want to text anything that admits sex, admits she was drunk, etc.

This may have legal consequences if you say anything.

If you like her and want to see more of her, do that. Don't buy into her frame of misery, instead proceed with seeing her and having fun.

roomwithoutaroof · 2018-05-16T15:08:11+00:00

$100 your next post is going to be "Girl accused me of rape when we had consensual sex, what should I do?"

You better have all the evidence that it was consensual ready, because you're about to get "regret raped."

Friendly reminder that if you are in Canada, text messages are not permissible in court as a defense, even if she is begging you to fuck her before and after the night in question.

KBeer01 · 2018-05-16T07:10:44+00:00

Dude, this one is easy to understand. She didn't have plausible deniability, you didn't give it to her so she had to hamster her way out of what she did to avoid responsibility.. however, she couldn't justify it in any good way so now she's tripping out on guilt.

I don't think you can do much right now, but going forward remember this:

Plausible deniability before sex:

This is the ideal. You should have used the "we are so drunk" thing, get her to buy into it and therefore alleviate all and any responsibility. That way, she can relax and just write if off as a drunk night.

Plausible deniability after sex:

If you haven't given her an out yet and you guys had sex, make sure to give her one. Afterwards you can talk about how crazy this was, how the wine caused you to just not be able to hold back anymore and how you just couldn't help yourself (TAKE THE BLAME YOURSELF, IMPORTANT!!!).

TLDR

Never forget to give her plausible deniability. YOU are responsible, it just "happened" and she just went along for the ride.

PS: All these guys advocating to just next her etc doesn't get this at all in my opinion. It's terrible advice. There is a lot more finesse to this game than just bulldozing forward, bitches need to get in line etc. This entire situation could have been avoided as explained above. Learn from your mistake and be better next time. Good luck!

cl3537 · 2018-05-16T05:24:02+00:00

You failed to provide adequate comfort after sex, either immediately after and definitely if you didn't respond to her text the day after.

If you don't want plates to fall try to remember women feel a connection after sex and you need spend a little bit of effort to keep them spinning.

in_monk_mode · 2018-05-16T07:32:25+00:00

In addition to the other comments I would make sure you have text evidence that it wasn't rape. Even if this involves saying that you like her or something like this. Cover your ass man.

patrickgelpke · 2018-05-16T02:43:43+00:00

That’s an insult to you and you should block her and move on. Wish her all the best

purplefidgetmidget · 2018-05-16T15:21:33+00:00

Sounds like standard ASD stuff. Firstly agree with her, that it doesn't normally move that first etc. etc. That'll tame the hamster. Then tell her you're not sure what you're looking for, and you don't want to jump into any kind of deep relationship, so you've set expectations. Then hit her with 'the talk' lines, tell her that you really enjoyed your time together and if she thinks it's too fast or it's not what she's looking for then you're sorry to see her go because you thought you had something. That stops her ego getting in the way, makes her feel in control, and also shows you're willing to walk away.

Triple threat.

burrrahhh · 2018-05-16T10:26:18+00:00

Don't next her now like everybody is saying take her out on a few dates call her a few times a day so as to avoid rape accusations. Then cut contact and next her.

Seoul_Brother · 2018-05-16T15:06:41+00:00

Protect yourself.

Make sure you keep your consensual texts and shit because I smell an accusation brewing.

Retstortion · 2018-05-16T02:37:39+00:00

Tell her you like her and enjoyed the time together

Block and delete

cptbaboo · 2018-05-16T11:10:12+00:00

Maybe unpopular opinion but sometimes a bit of humanity is not wrong.

Lets assume she really is feeling insecure about it and might be scared she is judged and just wants to latch out on an emotional level.

Without having proper knowledge about the whole situation: You could also just tell her its fine and you had fun and if she had fun too its all good. You don't have to be her emotional cusion but you are not a stone either. Also don't feel forced to communicate suddenly more with her. Just be a man and give her good feels by showing her you are comfortable with the situation. Show her you don't care about what people consider when to be appropriate. Also I would'nt get into any further discussion with her on this topic. You made your point. Either she is okay with this and accepts your frame or not, then you should move on.

spiritualdummy · 2018-05-16T03:32:46+00:00

Tell her to calm down, it was only sex. You both wanted it to happen and then it did. Sounds to me like she’s worried about hurting you. Tell her you still like her and want to hang out again.

Just say you enjoy her company and don’t want to think about labels. Her being hysterical about it is stupid, and she needs you to tell her that

Title	She regrets it: “feels miserable”
Author	DarkWhale___
Upvotes	14
Comments	31
Date	May 16, 2018 2:28 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/8jrgk3/she_regrets_it_feels_miserable/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/she-regrets-it-feels-miserable.97339 https://theredarchive.com/post/97339

Comments