FRAME Control - Work Presentations

Like to share with the beta guys some tips and mindsets that help me do presentations at work. MRP mindsets work in all areas of your life. I was a hard case newbie, something like this would have helped me. Enjoy.

Never again will you start your presentation feeling self-doubt and one down. If you go into any situation already doubting yourself or feeling “one down”, you already LOST.

This is the essence of frame control.

Each one of us is going through the world in a particular frame we have created for ourselves. You are the writer, director, and star of your own movie. YOU get to decide who the star is, who the protagonist is, who the antagonist is, and what the plot is, etc.

Anytime two or more people get together, there is a battle to see who can control that FRAME. Meaning, who is going to control the meaning of the interaction. It’s mostly on a subconscious level.

A good example of this is a common dating scenario played out at a bar.

It goes like this:

If you see a man and woman at a bar, who is the one going to do the approaching? Traditionally, the man will approach the woman and initiate conversation. The structure of the FRAME, in any given FRAME, you can hold one of three different positions.

You can be the dominate, equal, or you can be the subordinate.

Knowing this, when you go into meeting with the interview, a venture capitalist, or your boss, or in front of the CEO during your presentation, and you go in as a “subordinate”, you are basically giving up all your power in that situation.

You become the seller as opposed to the buyer.

Be the Prize:

Take a beautiful girl on a park bench by herself. You think she is really cute and would like to meet her. If you approach her from a position of dominance, you will win the battle of FRAME. Now, she must qualify herself to YOU. She jumps through your hoops, not you jumping through hers.

You are the prize, not her. Now, you’re in a position of strength and show high value as opposed to being weak and needy.

When a man approaches a woman, who is the prize? In most cases, people who haven’t been trained and don’t understand inner game skills or social dynamics, then the woman is the prize. Why?

Because she has something that I want.
I am seeking something from her; her attention, her validation, her phone number, sex, etc. She is the one with the value. And because of this, I am the seeker and the woman holds all the power.

Therefore, the woman can decide to either give or withhold validation or access.

So, if you are going to pitch a product, give a presentation, or approach an attractive woman, or pitch an opportunity, you have to come into the situation as the person giving the opportunity, not the person asking for the sale.

Two totally different positions, right? Just that subtle shift in your brain will cause your physiology (your body language) to shift and also your tonality. Your entire outlook will be different. Other people will pick up on it subconsciously.

More importantly, you will have self-confidence.

Instead of feeling like you need to impress the boss or your coworkers during your presentation or not look like a complete idiot in front of everyone else, you must get in the mindset that this is an opportunity for THEM to learn more about whatever you are presenting. You are the EXPERT at what you are presenting, this is a chance for everyone to learn more about it and ask questions.

You are not “giving a speech”, but instead, “presenting information”.

You don’t need to feel like you are selling something and desperately trying to seek their acceptance or approval. You are the EXPERT, you are simply presenting information, they can take it or leave it.

It’s a mental tweak from what we were led to believe about getting others to approve of us. A lot of it goes back to State Control. If you can control your physiology, your posture, your breathing, then you can control your state. And if you can control your state, you can control the FRAME. Then you ultimately control the interaction.

An Example:

Watch a group of guys get together at a bar or sporting event- you see this all the time. Biggest dick contest. It’s basically an alpha contest- jockeying for position and dominance- trying to determine who’s the alpha amongst the group. There’s usually organized chaos until the alpha emerges. The minute the alpha is established, everyone else starts to fall in line.

It’s a FRAME! Human beings are pre-conditioned to subconsciously create FRAMES.

We will always to try to reach a position in the hierarchy so we know how to act.

But this means we can change it.

Most people don’t know that they can change the FRAME and their position in the hierarchy. So, they stay stuck in whatever position they are in.

Don’t Start the Presentation as the Subordinate:

For your presentation, if you walk in there like you are begging for the sale or talking in a way that you aren’t really sure what you are saying, or it sounds like you aren’t even buying what you are saying, you are most likely coming across to everyone in the room as if you are seeking validation and approval.

This automatically FRAMES him (your boss) as the alpha - the dominate- and you as the subordinate, and he will eat you alive. Get yourself in the “You are the Prize” mindset.

You need to cultivate this mindset in everything you do. It’s hard, I understand, because we are taught very young age to be humble, not brag, and to not show off.

Well, how’s that working for you now as an adult?

I’m not saying to do anything of those things, don’t be arrogant, but do step into your power. This is only one way to begin that process.

You have to adopt the mindset that you have value simply because it comes from you. You will then be playing the lead role in your own life. You are your own judge. If you are saying and doing what YOU THINK is best, then nothing else matters. No one gets to judge you. Use this mindset to create a strong inner game in life.

Go in there as the Dominate:

Instead of walking into that presentation as the subordinate and seller, go in as the DOMINATE. Imagine if you go in there holding your frame and giving your presentation from a point of power which is of present energy, on point, hitting your bullet points, giving value, as the expert in the room on this topic,

as if saying:

“Look, I’m the expert on this topic and I’m a professional. I did my due diligence and homework to prepare for this presentation. This is what I got, you either want it or you don’t. I could care less what you think. I’ve done this 100 times before. This is an opportunity for YOU to learn more about this topic. Ask me some questions if you want to learn more. If you don’t take it, I have 4 other presentations today and other things to do.”.

You don’t have to sell anything. You don’t have to qualify yourself to anyone. You are the person with value. Don’t do it in a way that challenges their self-esteem, but also don’t present it in a way that lowers yours.

It’s hard to do at first, I realize, especially, when we make pictures in our brains. We make pictures in our brains of people who have status, but we make the pictures of them really big and out of proportion to how we see ourselves so we act that way in real life.

Let’s do a simple exercise by using your imagination to make the people in the room seem small and make your vision of yourself large.

Exercise # 1

Minimizing the Room

Use this simple exercise to make the perceived Alpha in the room appear a lot less intimidating and smaller to you. You can also do the reverse of this to blow up the image of yourself. You can practice this at home or right before you go on stage.
The perceived alpha at my work is very intimidating to everyone.

His has this demeaner about himself: His presence, his strength., and he is a big-time asshole. This is how I learned to minimize him when I do my presentations.

Imagine doing this to the CEO at the head of table as you are waiting for your presentation, before you walk up to the podium.

Think of the person who you are about to give the presentation to – someone who has a commanding presence and intimidates you- your boss, CEO, supervisor, Bill from accounting, etc.

Imagine him out in the space in front of you, inside of a picture frame. Reach out and touch him. Really, physically reach out now and touch this picture. Now trace the edges of the frame with your fingers.

Now, as if you are minimizing the screen on your smart phone, grab the corners of the picture and make the picture smaller. Notice what happens to the feelings?

Continuing on…

Now, with the picture still minimized, make the picture even smaller. Then, lift it up and throw it over the back of your head. Now what happens to the feelings? You feel pretty good, huh?
That person isn’t so intimidating now, is he? That girl isn’t so unintimidating now to go up and talk to, right?

How did this happen?

Below the threshold of conscience awareness, is a completely different coding system that forms the foundation of how you perceive reality. Once you see how the matrix works, you can never un see it.

We live in a completely holographic reality.

When we can tap into the underlining code, we can change how our nervous system processes any memory or any thought, or any FRAME.

If all you did was take pictures of anyone who you are going to present to, and make their picture smaller (mentally, by using the technique above), and yours a lot bigger than theirs, you will walk into that room 10 times more confident. Without having to do anything else. If you change your physiology, you going to walk in there and radiate, unconsciously, to their nervous system.. a different FRAME.

Their perceptional filters are going to shift, and their first impression of you is going to predispose them to viewing you as more authoritative. The best part is – you didn’t even say a word yet! That’s pretty good, right?

Exercise # 2

Maximizing Yourself

Use this simple technique to make yourself feel a lot more confident.

Imagine a picture of yourself out in the space in front of you, inside of a picture frame.

Reach out and touch him. Really, physically reach out now and touch this picture. Now trace the edges of the frame with your fingers. Also, think of a time that you felt really good about yourself. Maybe, it was a time you passed an exam, received a job promotion, got married, banged a hot chick, etc. Remember how you felt. Try to feel that same feeling now.

Now, as if you are maximizing the screen on your smart phone, grab the corners of the picture and make the picture bigger. Not just the picture, but also the feelings associated with it.

Notice what happens to the feelings?

Now, with the picture still maximized, make the picture and feelings even larger. Then, lift it up and drape it over you like a warm comforting blanket.

Now what happens to the feelings? You feel pretty good, huh?

Summary:

• If you go into any situation already doubting yourself or feeling “one down”, you already LOST.

• Each one of us is going through the world in a particular frame we have created for ourselves.

• You are the writer, director, and star of you own movie.

• You can be the dominate, equal, or you can be the subordinate.

• If you begin from a position of dominance, you will win the battle of FRAME.

• Come into the situation as the person giving the opportunity as opposed to the person asking for the sale.

• Your presentation is an opportunity for people to learn more about whatever you are presenting.

• You are the EXPERT at what you are presenting. You are simply presenting information, they can take it or leave it.

• Don’t Start the Presentation as the Subordinate

• You have value simply because it comes from you.

• Come in as the Dominate. You are your own judge. No one gets to judge you.

• You don’t have to sell anything. You don’t have to qualify yourself to anyone. You are the person with value.

• This is an opportunity for THEM to learn more about what you do. They can take it or leave it.