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ChicoBrillo Archive

View 14 posts and 959 comments by ChicoBrillo on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

I did end up bailing, I value clarity too much
/r/seduction17/07/26 09:17 PM
5

Ideally? Women would enjoy casual and fwb situations, maybe even most. Realistically? Many won’t pursue them because they don’t want to be pumped and dumped. You also have societal pressure of slut shaming. I feel what often happens is a woman will engage in what is essentially a fwb situation but they will build up a bunch of rhetoric so that it doesn’t feel like it is in their minds. Example: “we are dating and going with the flow” when in all reality it can't be differentiated from a fwb situ…
/r/seduction17/07/26 01:59 PM
1

She’s weird man, I cut her off because I didn’t see a point in continuing
/r/seduction17/07/26 01:14 PM
11

Lmfao, dude…this girl said all that stuff yesterday and then hit me up today totally disregarding it all and inviting herself over
/r/seduction16/07/26 09:59 PM
2

I think she’s crazy lol. She messaged me today and basically invited herself over to my place
/r/seduction16/07/26 09:36 PM
2

Yes a/c is air conditioning. The other part is in reference to the OP. She basically was like we shouldn’t have sex again, but prior to that she was like that was hot and “can I ride you next time?”. Idk she’s crazy dude lol
/r/seduction16/07/26 09:36 PM
9

I think you’re right, she hit me up today and basically invited herself over lol
/r/seduction16/07/26 09:19 PM
2

People are different, some people will not have sex with you on the first date no matter what. TBH I usually don’t expect it, I feel like most women will at least make you wait past the first date. We went out to eat and I mentioned that my apartment was nearby and said we could stop in for some a/c and go back out. We got to my apartment and she was like “can we just be old and watch a movie instead?” I was like “sure”. Again, I wasn’t gonna push for sex, I didn’t expect it. We started cuddling…
/r/seduction16/07/26 08:49 PM
2

That’s solid advice and I think you’re right. She frames it more like she wants to but is trying to control herself. She clearly loves sex lol
/r/seduction16/07/26 08:06 PM
8

It was good sex and I feel like really she wants to keep doing it but she’s like slit shaming herself. I’m gonna just put my cards on the table, take it or leave it style and see what happens
/r/seduction16/07/26 08:05 PM
3

Yeah you know I’m ngl you’re right, I should have known better but she was fine
/r/seduction16/07/26 06:57 PM
6

Yeah seems like it
/r/seduction16/07/26 06:41 PM
11

Lmao that’s pretty apt actually. You can keep giving vague answers and driving but eventually you’ll have to give a yes or no
/r/seduction16/07/26 06:41 PM
15

Venting on the toilet
/r/seduction16/07/26 06:30 PM
14

The thing is she says no sex but I feel like it would happen anyway. My issue is more that I don’t like playing games like that
/r/seduction16/07/26 06:14 PM
3

Oh I mean I have other people I see, I’m just asking myself if this is worth my time and energy
/r/seduction16/07/26 06:10 PM
12

Hmm interesting especially your last comment. Maybe when I reach out to her today I’ll emphasize that I’m not solely interested in sex and see if that gets me anywhere
/r/seduction16/07/26 05:07 PM
2

That’s all very true, lol I was so hyped to be single again but forgot about these issues that arise
/r/seduction16/07/26 04:56 PM
1

Yeah I’m definitely heading that direction, I have a date with someone else who is saying the same thing “I don’t do fwb but we can kiss”, and obv we know where kissing leads…just an annoying song and dance sometimes
/r/seduction16/07/26 04:46 PM
7

Do you ever feel bothered by people who don’t know what they want or are hypocritical? It’s hard for me to get past, I like feeling like we’re on the same page
/r/seduction16/07/26 04:41 PM
0

I feel like good wingmen are born not made. iME the best ones are the ones that have opposite strengths and weaknesses as you . For example. My one friend was super outgoing and had no fear walking up and talking to anyone at the bar. I was too shy. His problem however was that he could come off strong and people could get the impression he’s kind if crazy. But I balanced him out because I was very chill and once the girls met me they’d realize we’re just fun guys. That guy got me laid so many t…
/r/seduction14/07/26 05:01 AM
1

You could be right, I initially read it that she for sure had a bf.
/r/seduction14/07/26 04:14 AM
1

Don’t just like their pictures with no comment. Treat it like you’re engagement farming them (lol): respond to their prompts with a hot take, asking their opinion (provoking a hot take from them), asking a question etc On your profile make sure that you’re clear about what you’re looking for. Even if you don’t know what you want say that in a respectable way ie “not quite sure what I want, just enjoying meeting new people and seeing what’s out there for now” Do a voice memo prompt, people want t…
/r/seduction14/07/26 12:39 AM
2

Best of luck bro
/r/seduction14/07/26 12:02 AM
2

I can only tell you what I would do, if she’s lying about a bf that makes things even weirder. Up to you though bro.
/r/seduction13/07/26 11:39 PM
7

People who cheat (emotionally and/or physically) mostly want attention and validation. My prediction if you pursue her: she is mostly a tease, if you try to escalate she will say “no don’t” but will keep hanging with you and giving mixed signals. You’ll mostly feel frustrated/annoyed but she will feel good that a young guy wants her. If you keep pursuing you might get as far as sexual contact, but she either ghost you or you find yourself in a sneaky link situation where she goes through the dra…
/r/seduction13/07/26 11:24 PM
1

Fair enough, good for not shitting where you eat. Its only worth it if it’s some shitty good service job that you’re not going to stay at long
/r/seduction13/07/26 11:19 PM
9

I personally wouldn’t act on it. I’ve been the other man before, not worth it imo.
/r/seduction13/07/26 11:16 PM
7

So why post this exactly? What are you looking for as a response?
/r/seduction13/07/26 11:13 PM
4

So one of the dates was with somebody who was new to the city and a foodie so I asked her if she ever had this one dish that is unique to the city but not super widely known outside of the city. She never had so she got to explore a new area, try a new and good food, she was impressed and gave me a lot of kudos for that.
/r/seduction13/07/26 06:29 PM
1

Yes obviously someone has to be attracted to you, that goes without saying, but I will also say that not all selfies are the same. I am smiling in mine and it’s not me shirtless in a mirror. A lot of men’s selfies are then scowling or looking very serious.
/r/seduction13/07/26 05:11 PM
1

“Am I the only one”
/r/seduction13/07/26 04:34 PM
2

Idk if I agree with your conclusion, you say you don’t approach but then blame it on being held to a higher standard. Ime having lived all over the place, location can really be the ultimate make it / break it. I had four dates this last weekend in a city as opposed to one when I was in the suburbs for six months beforehand.
/r/seduction13/07/26 02:22 PM
-1

You’re saying this is hard? Im not getting your point
/r/seduction13/07/26 02:05 PM
2

Lord help you if the angry short guys see this reply
/r/seduction13/07/26 01:32 PM
-1

Seriously. I dated a girl who was mixed half black half white and she told me multiple stories of guys making racial jokes on the first date
/r/seduction13/07/26 01:32 PM
1

What’s funny is I have two selfies because my phone is new and I didn’t have enough natural photos on it. Voice memo is def boss move. Answering prompts that show your depth, humor, and what you want are also key. I think people want to know what they’re singing up for and if you know what you want you should be clear about it on your profile
/r/seduction13/07/26 01:31 PM
1

I think you could do great man. Especially if you can communicate where you’re at with people and own your situation. People get insecure after break ups sometimes like they’ll never find someone else, or people will view their break up as a red flag. Reality is, it happens all the time and it only looks bad if you’re clearly still bothered by it. If you come out the other side feeling positive about life, it will be attractive
/r/seduction13/07/26 01:29 PM
2

I got a ton from hinge, I’m new to the area but I plan on doing hobby groups as well. I don’t drink anymore so no clubs or bars. I cold approach some times in day game settings but not often.
/r/seduction13/07/26 01:22 PM
1

Is that what I’m saying? You should also be secure in yourself, interesting and actually able to communicate your intentions and feelings. Lots of guys fail because they’re needy, insecure, boring, etc I’m not implying all you need to do is be nice
/r/seduction13/07/26 01:19 PM
1

Keeping a positive attitude is really important, nobody likes being around negativity, hence why a lot of the angry guys on here will stay frustrated forever
/r/seduction13/07/26 01:16 PM
1

“It’s not easier just because you’re having more success with less effort”
/r/seduction13/07/26 01:12 PM
1

Lol I really hit a nerve
/r/seduction13/07/26 01:09 PM
1

Damn, I was trying to impress you :(
/r/seduction13/07/26 01:04 PM
2

Yeah that’s why I mentioned I live in a city, it’s a legit factor. Regardless, I still feel like dating in rural areas (for example) is probably as hard as it’s ever been, not exceptionally hard rn
/r/seduction12/07/26 10:45 PM
5

yes i will not deny the regionality. I was living in a suburb before this and dating was dry as a bone
/r/seduction12/07/26 10:10 PM
45

Anything specific you want me to touch on? I've been using Hinge (unpaid) which I find to be leagues better than the other apps because it is more mindful and promotes more thoughtful messaging which is what I'm getting at in my post. Women IMO aren't as into ONS these days, they want some romance, some effort, some openness etc. I feel like a lot of men aren't good at communicating what they want, many don't even know what they want.
/r/seduction12/07/26 09:43 PM
21

27 is the youngest I go, anyone younger than that is a total headache to deal with and honestly embarrassing to be seen with in public. I am not financially stable lol. I do agree with you on certain accounts, however I have other friends my age who can't get a date to save their lives despite not being bad looking, most of them more fit then me and financially better off too.
/r/seduction12/07/26 09:38 PM
17

Im 35, I prefer to date women closer to my age but im in a city where it’s not hard to find women my age who are down for casual. I feel you, I don’t really like dating women in their 20s for the most part. 25 feels too young to where they’re kind of a head ache. I prefer more like 27 and up at my age but more ideally in their 30s.
/r/seduction11/07/26 02:36 AM
3

Lol that’s a good comparison. Idk man, the last time I knew I didn’t perform that well because since I had already been regularly having sex with her I kinda stopped trying and was happy to just get my own nut off and fall asleep. Tbh the majority of women don’t get off with out clitoral stimulation meaning if you’re not giving them head they’re probably not orgasming. Some women get off from penetration alone but not most Edit: I should say not being able to last a while can annoy women too, ev…
/r/seduction10/07/26 06:49 PM
9

I would say this is somewhat normal tbh, the novelty wares off after that initial period and they have to ask themselves where you fit in their life. If you’re not bf material or interested in that, that can be one reason you get put on the back burner, while she continues dating and seeing what else is out there. There’s many different possibilities. It’s possible you don’t lay the D down super well. I’ve been there lol. TBH I tend to lose interest when the novelty wares off as well and I’m not…
/r/seduction10/07/26 04:38 PM
3

This drives me up a wall man. I think back to being 20, being told I look like napoleon dynamite all the time, being insanely awkward, I still never thought of myself as a lost cause the way young men do now. It’s sad really.
/r/seduction07/07/26 02:28 PM
0

I have been feeling a huge shift lately that women are leaning back towards wanting romance, to feel pursued, and have good conversation. I am 35 and just moved back to a major city. I felt like a leper in the burbs being single at my age but I won’t lie I’m having some of the most success in my life atm. I feel like the black pill and other ideologies have poisoned the minds of so many men that simply being genuine, positive minded, and funny these days will get you incredibly far.
/r/seduction07/07/26 02:11 PM
2

Hey wow I had the exact same experience. OP don’t choose a college for the party scene, you won’t get laid and you’ll end up dropping out because your grades suck
/r/seduction07/07/26 05:03 AM
2

I feel like that isn't safe in a city, I don't do that, you gotta be aware of your surroundings
/r/seduction07/07/26 02:58 AM
6

Every where has its pros and cons, if it were me i'd choose NYC because I find New Yorkers a lot easier to get along with and less BS. Real Angelinos are cool, but the transplants are insufferable. I'm in Chicago personally and I think it's pretty easy dating personally
/r/seduction06/07/26 09:29 PM
25

known but little acknowledged fact about guys who fuck a lot: they aren't only fucking 10s. Guys I've known who were bagging hotties were also bagging 3s. Sex addiction is a hell of a drug
/r/seduction06/07/26 03:46 PM
3

Surely doesn’t hurt
/r/seduction05/07/26 04:30 PM
1

I feel like when people say masculine they mean more of a look usually. Just think manly: strong forearms, facial hair, not fruity.
/r/seduction05/07/26 04:28 PM
13

I’ll be honest I feel like it’s not natural for most men. Most naturals, I believe, grew up with girls interested in them, so they just grew up being chased after and learned that way. I think the average man you’re thinking about is more so just not cripplingly insecure, and has “normal” social skills. People who end up needing to learn game are usually people who are significantly behind their peers, and, at least in my case, a lot of it came from what I mentioned and just being woefully inexp…
/r/seduction05/07/26 04:18 PM
4

“Depending on the situation” is carrying all the weight here. Yeah, it’s worth it to be direct if you catch the vibe that you’re dealing with a direct person. Not everybody is they way though, some people aren’t comfortable with directness even though they may want the same thing.
/r/seduction02/07/26 03:59 AM
4

Something that helped me out a lot when I was younger was working in bars/restaurants, basically stripped my awkwardness off me by force
/r/seduction02/07/26 03:15 AM
8

I mean, I’m with you that it’s on the man to move things along but it’s always been like that. As far as a 5/10 midwestern girl going for an nyc 10, you’re def being hyperbolic. I don’t think attraction works in numbers like that. People have types. I’m a red head and that means I am a 0/10 for many women, but there is a small contingent where I am a 10/10. Think in terms of being polarizing, you don’t want mass appeal, most people don’t have mass appeal and will never be able to achieve it. Lea…
/r/seduction02/07/26 02:56 AM
1

i mean there's only so many ways somebody can tell you no. All you can do is take it in stride, or if they actually are cool, friendship can be worth it, but not if you're just treating it like a long con to get with them,
/r/seduction30/06/26 11:10 PM
1

Are you straight up propositioning them for sex? I’m never that bold, idt it’s smart, but at the end of the day she’s still inviting you over..that’s not really an L in my book. Most people need to warm up and get to know you first, not everybody is into casual/ons
/r/seduction30/06/26 09:42 PM
7

Lol, what you want them to reject you rudely instead? I don't really get what you're saying, I don't think it has anything to do with being assertive. It's hard to give advice not knowing how you act or what you say to them. Ime, if she's interested, she's interested, she won't suddenly want to reject you because you aren't 'assertive'. Unless what you're saying is that you are hand wringing and clearly insecure. Tbh, I am not that straight forward, I'm generally kind of passive and it works for…
/r/seduction30/06/26 08:19 PM
2

Unless you’re from a small religious community Idt most care, and the older you get the less and less likely someone is a virgin.
/r/ExRedPill28/06/26 04:22 AM
7

I can only speak for myself, I just focused on becoming more social in general. Making comments to strangers, striking up random conversations, once it becomes an ingrained habit, you will naturally strike up conversations with women you find attractive as well.
/r/seduction28/06/26 03:57 AM
1

Yeah, I mean there's plenty of people who don't do night life / don't drink and still have libidos. I'm by no means a pro, like I don't go out with the intent of same day lays or anything like that. I just walk around a lot in my city during the day time and chat up strangers, sometimes it leads to things sometimes it doesn't. I just can't do night clubs, I can't hear for shit
/r/seduction27/06/26 02:33 PM
1

I don’t like bars and clubs myself so I don’t go to them. It’s unnecessary especially if you yourself don’t see them as a good time. Im day game all day
/r/seduction27/06/26 01:59 PM
2

Ive been focusing on not thinking when I approach because that usually leads to over thinking and not approaching. I just say whatever comes to mind and Ive said some really stupid shit sometimes haha but honestly, as long as you’re smiling and respectful, most aren’t going to be mad at you. And even if you say something dumb, if they think you’re attractive they won’t care.
/r/seduction24/06/26 09:47 PM
1

This was truly disturbing to read to the point that I didn’t read the last paragraph. Pure insanity
/r/seduction24/06/26 02:11 AM
10

That’s why you gotta stop thinking
/r/seduction23/06/26 05:49 PM
1

It's more about commitment than attraction. A relationship based on attraction doesn't tend to last long because the longer you know somebody the less attractive (human) they become, at least this has been my experience.
/r/seduction22/06/26 10:44 PM
3

She might have known the guy, we don't know the details on that so there might have already been some comfort. Plus, meeting a girl on a night out where everybody is drunk has different rules of engagement than trying to holler at a classmate. You're not going to pick up a girl from your class and have sex the same day 9 times out of 10.
/r/seduction18/06/26 04:23 PM
1

He caught her at the right time is how I would interpret that. You came at her with dates which is completely fine too. We can't relate as men most of the time because we don't often get sex underhand tossed to us, but if you were drunk and a girl was rubbing up on you, you'd do it too even if you weren't interested in her that much (especially with alcohol involved). She actually likes you and looks like you're going to get laid, just keep the course man. I wouldn't let it bother you man becaus…
/r/seduction18/06/26 04:22 PM
24

Sexual tension is "will we? won't we?" basically riding the line of maybe as long as possible, escalating litte by little, pulling back a little, etc
/r/seduction18/06/26 02:08 AM
1

good points, I think its a convenient excuse at times. Oh I've just been cursed beyond my control, oh well, guess I'll just play games and live on the internet since it doesn't matter if I try or not.
/r/seduction14/06/26 06:50 PM
5

No, I can’t do California, I get annoyed too easily and can’t afford it
/r/seduction14/06/26 05:52 PM
1

blackpill to me is a cult of thought. Yes there is a thread of truth to it, but they take it to an extreme and act like its the end all be all. Appearance is important, but it's important in the sense that you should try to look your best: wear better clothes, be well groomed, improve posture, etc. It's a person's first impression of you. If you have greasy unkempt hair, a pubic beard, and oversized clothes that look like your mom bought them, yeah it's going to hinder you. I would put myself at…
/r/seduction10/06/26 02:59 PM
1

I would say looks attract but seduction lands the plane.
/r/seduction10/06/26 02:35 PM
2

You could fish with horrible bait or fish with really good bait, the guy with good bait is going to out perform the guy with bad bait, but they’re both going to out perform the guy who is sitting on the couch
/r/seduction10/06/26 02:25 PM
1

I mean you're leaps and bounds beyond most men your age I would imagine, so at least you got that going on for you. Nobody can really answer whether or not you're doing anything wrong without knowing what went down. I can only tell you some educated guesses based on my own experience. For me, when I've heard this it was because 1) she wanted a more put-together professional guy and I came off like a wandering bum (which I was to be fair). 2) There was no chemistry, which is different than physic…
/r/seduction09/06/26 10:48 PM
3

If I'm in that situation I usually friend them on instagram, and when I see them post a story about an event or something I might just be like "That looks fun, invite me next time!" Or if I find an event I'll just text them and ask if they're interested in going. Or if they post pictures of their friends you can always be like "whoa is she single?" One of my platonic lady friends is into clothing and cooking, so I mostly hit her up to go thrifting and it's nice to get her opinion on if stuff loo…
/r/seduction07/06/26 03:59 AM
9

It's funny, when you're young and inexperienced it feels important to get your number up. Then you get older and you're like, why am I having sex with people I don't like? Who am I doing this for?
/r/seduction06/06/26 01:57 PM
2

I stopped seeing a fwb recently, it was just getting kind of weird. I got some prospects but I'm also in the middle of moving among some other things so I'm not that concerned at the moment but I think it's going to be a fun summer after I finish everything
/r/seduction06/06/26 01:54 PM
3

The answer is always "no problem" or something to that effect. It might be legit, it might just be an excuse, either way, if she's actually into you she'll offer some kind of reschedule or at least reemphasize that she does want to go out with you. For example: "I'm so sorry! I totally forgot about xyz thing I have to do : (. I'm usually free on Fridays though!" - something like this would tell me it's not an excuse and she is interested.
/r/seduction04/06/26 02:36 PM
5

Its a skill to shut out the defeatist thought, in life in general. If I ever notice I'm starting to doubt myself I litterally say "nope, not thinking that" in my mind, and push it out of my head lol
/r/seduction04/06/26 02:32 PM
32

Something I'll add is a lot of guys don't shoot their shot early enough either. Whether it's fear of rejection, or obsessive tendencies, they get hung up on a girl that doesn't even know he's interested. The whole thing can be mitigated by showing interest and shooting the shot early, get the rejection so you can keep it moving (lends to your volume argument). Also, I think a lot of guys, especially young/newbs get too upset too quick. You have to be patient like a fisherman. Put yourself out th…
/r/seduction04/06/26 02:27 PM
1

Don't feel too bad, a lot of people never experience that young love in adolescence. The first time I ever felt I loved somebody and fell head over heels, I was like 26 and it ended horribly...I don't really look back on it that fondly, it's just easy to yearn for what you don't have. For age gaps, it's tricky and a hot topic currently. I personally, wouldn't seriously date somebody with a significant age gap, and I've tried, it just doesn't work ime. I think it's fair game for hooking up and ca…
/r/seduction02/06/26 03:57 PM
1

seriously dude, that's the attitude you need to have. Ideally, you eventually learn to shoot your shot before you get invested and it's even eaasier.
/r/seduction01/06/26 02:15 PM
1

It probably has less to do with your looks then you think. Not saying you're neurodivergent but I find that usually has way more to do with it.
/r/seduction31/05/26 10:21 PM
3

You meet the same people on apps as you do in person imo, the apps are only bad if you get too invested in them. For me, I just swipe on them casually, not expecting anything. When I get a match I send a message which is pretty much just me confirming that they meant to swipe me. I'll have a little bit of a back and forth, nothing too long, again just mostly confirming they are interested. Then I just go for meeting up in person, ime most women would rather just meet up and see if the chemistry …
/r/seduction31/05/26 08:14 PM
1

I usually get it the first time since Im inviting them out but pretty much every one I've ever dated then offers to get it next time. Well yeah, I mean 1NS is inherently not gonna be a good time for the woman. It's usually more enjoyable for the man. I mean life's not a porno man, the vast majority of men aren't just going to run through woman after woman in a one night stand. I wouldn't frame it as them not wanting to be cheap or you having to win them over but more that youre building comfort …
/r/seduction31/05/26 12:26 AM
2

Idk I feel like most women I date like to keep it fair and offer to pay on and off. Also acting like you "have" to manipulate them is..interesting. have you never tried being up front with what you want? Ime most women appreciate it and plenty don't want relationships either
/r/seduction30/05/26 02:43 PM
1

I'll be honest, it's the luck of the draw. I'm currently in the deep suburbs, basically a small town being slowly devoured by urban sprawl, and it is very very slim pickings. I deal with by going to my nearby city and dating there. Not always ideal, seems like I can really only manage casual relationships since realistically I can only visit on weekends, but beats having nobody Oh, there might be a bar in town that single women hang out at. Maybe ask gemeni or google
/r/seduction29/05/26 03:59 PM
0

If you think of it like a traffic light, I would consider a 'maybe' as a yellow light. Like, could happen, but I'm not going to invest much into that, my attitude would be "if it happens it happens". Sometimes they say maybe because they don't want to hurt your feelings and flat out reject you, or they could be not serious about meeting with anyone in the first place, or could be in a weird situation with their ex...you never really know, don't take it personally. Instead of calling twice I woul…
/r/seduction28/05/26 04:56 PM
1

It's more important that how much you want sex goes along with your partner. Mismatched labidos tend to cause problems
/r/seduction27/05/26 10:36 PM
1

I'll be honest, they were saying the same shit when I was in my teens-early twenties (millenial). I'm sure that even boomers were lamenting the free love movement and womens lib. Think how many songs through the ages are about the hardships of romance. It is a never ending well.
/r/seduction27/05/26 10:35 PM
2

i dont care, half the time i close my eyes
/r/seduction27/05/26 02:23 PM
3

Theyre "promiscuous" because it's hard to maintain a relationship when you work crazy hours (nurses) or travel frequently (flight attendant). In the case of nurses, they tend to mingle with others in their field because who else is getting off work at 3am? If you have normal working hours, you'll probably find it hard to even go on a date with a nurse. Flight attendants? What can you do but see one on tinder and hope she swipes you back? You could shoot your shot on a flight I suppose, but there…
/r/seduction26/05/26 04:07 PM
24

I worked at a summer camp that was staffed by college students and there was tradition of drunken orgies. I wasn't a student and I was much older then them so I didn't participate but I heard a lot about them and basically left parties when I knew they were about to turn that way. These were drunk college kids so definitely on the sloppy side and probably grey area consensually. Some were more about it than others, I was told that once a year there was always someone who had a mental break down …
/r/seduction25/05/26 01:34 PM
1

In those scenarios I prioritize fun, which in turn attracts people. You have an allibi to talk to every last person there. “Grooms side or brides side? Oh how do you know them?” Etc easy. Go have fun on the dance floor, risk looking a little silly but have fun. Women will notice you, flirting will happen
/r/seduction25/05/26 02:31 AM
6

That's not gonna work at all bro lol esp trying to be slick and pull a bait and switch at the end
/r/seduction21/05/26 02:17 AM
1

Would you feel jealous if he gave more attention to your friend then you? If he finished with her instead of you? I've never had a threesome but I've heard stories like these where the gf leaves feeling jealous and messed up over it. If you think you could handle the jealousy or what not, maybe go for it? How would you feel if he started wanting it to be regular thing? Or if your friend and him started having their own thing going on and sexting? Things to consider because you can't put the lid …
/r/seduction20/05/26 02:44 PM
13

You literally have nothing to lose
/r/seduction19/05/26 09:55 PM
11

The problem I see is guys take things very literally. Most people are open to compliments on their appearance, it's more about how it's said though. If you emerge out of the shadows and say "you're pretty" and that's all you can muster to say, then yeah that's weird. If you talk to her and smoothly weave it in, she's not going to be instantly turned off if she's otherwise into you.
/r/seduction18/05/26 04:14 PM
14

I need you to understand these "rules" you speak of come from random guys on reddit that you can't confirm if they actually know what they're talking about. A lot of blind leading the blind. My last girlfriend was very attractive. She got compliments constantly, service workers, strangers, randos would always come talk to her and be nice if not overtly flirt with her (compared to other women I've dated who might as well be invisible to others). I didn't follow any "rules", we clicked and she was…
/r/seduction18/05/26 03:38 PM
3

did you stand completely still and grin menacingly?
/r/seduction17/05/26 04:20 AM
2

did you say something dumb?
/r/seduction17/05/26 04:17 AM
1

good for you man, sounds like you figured out what you want
/r/seduction15/05/26 03:04 AM
25

You can't have it all man
/r/seduction13/05/26 09:36 PM
1

Seems liek you already have a rapport yes? I would just say something like "you came up on my reccomended on instagram, I sent you a request". I would say it casually but it opens the door to take the relationship outside of the workplace.
/r/seduction11/05/26 03:19 PM
7

You sound kind of depressed based off of this and some of your replies to comments. Did you give the date a fair shake? Were you trying to make it fun? It's fine if you don't feel a connection, that's kind of the point of dating (testing the waters with people). You also sound a little bit like you don't know what you want. In one breath you're saying it was boring and you felt nothing, and then on the other you felt you should have went for a kiss. You need to be more decisive, nobody likes mix…
/r/seduction11/05/26 02:21 PM
2

You can even just nod your head to the beat, the majority of people are in their heads worrying about themselves, even if you look foolish you actually break the ice for other people to dance
/r/seduction07/05/26 04:29 PM
2

No risk no reward
/r/seduction07/05/26 04:28 PM
35

You don't have to dance well, the fact that you dance at all is appreciated, especially if you start the dancing. Partner dancing like salsa and swing is beyond me, but if we're just talking general club/party environment, literally do anything
/r/seduction07/05/26 03:26 PM
1

It's not what happens in the story, it's how you tell it.
/r/seduction06/05/26 06:49 PM
2

I don't remember who said it but they said "game is like plastic surgery. If you can tell it's plastic surgery, it's not good plastic surgery"
/r/seduction05/05/26 05:10 PM
3

I've traveled a lot and I've found leading with polite curiosity can be a great way to break the ice especially when someone might be timid. Emphasis on polite. Can always start out with "sorry, I don't mean to bother you but ______" (make an observation, ask a question) The other day I had a really nice convo with a Brazillian woman because I recognized the food she was selling was brazillian. I just straight up asked "Are you Brazillian?" and shared what I know about Brazil and asked questions…
/r/seduction05/05/26 03:51 PM
2

Something I learned the hard way more than once is that she’s not going to make you wait or prove yourself if she’s into you.
/r/seduction05/05/26 12:33 AM
1

Eh sounds like she might not know what she wants. tbh I don’t see this working out for you, in my experience women don’t make you wait and prove yourself if they like you.
/r/seduction05/05/26 12:29 AM
1

I don’t know where you draw the line at what you consider flirting because how do you show interest without flirting? Unless you’re going to robotically say “I’m having fun, you are attractive”. On the other hand, if you’re talking about closing, you can just be direct and it can work. I’ve done it plenty of times, “do you want to cuddle?” Or “can I kiss you?”
/r/seduction04/05/26 04:40 AM
1

Yeah totally weird man
/r/seduction04/05/26 01:01 AM
2

Hey man Im not judging you
/r/seduction04/05/26 12:57 AM
2

nice, guys are a lot easier to hook up with
/r/seduction03/05/26 10:27 PM
2

OPs talking about converting friends who have shown interest in him already into fwb, you've never watched tv with a friend?
/r/seduction03/05/26 09:42 PM
2

You're being a pen pal, you should ask her out much earlier. Most women don't want to text eternally either, in my experience they are usually open to a low stakes meeting early on to vlsee if you vibe in person. If you talk too much online you kinda kill the intrigue and have nothing to talk about when you meet.
/r/seduction03/05/26 04:40 PM
1

In the Greek sense you lean too much into logos. Try leaning more into ethos and especially pathos
/r/seduction03/05/26 04:20 PM
10

Cook dinner, hang out, watch tv, it always eventually hits that lull where you can tell she’s ready for you to make a move
/r/seduction03/05/26 04:42 AM
12

What’s worked for me a few times is asking while watching tv one on one “do you want to cuddle?” And if they’re like “what? Why?” I’ll just be like “why not? Could be nice”. It’s easy to escalate from cuddling if that’s the vibe.
/r/seduction03/05/26 04:38 AM
18

I think you should work on social skills and trying to develop some extroversion. I know it's easier said then done, but developing that more general skill is the real foundation. Convos feel like an interrogation (likely) because you don't enjoy socializing / it stresses you out which bleeds into your interactions. Again, easier said than done, but you have to find a way to make it fun for yourself. You don't have to be hype if that's not authentic to you. Surely you have some kind of sense of …
/r/seduction01/05/26 05:12 PM
1

I used the word "rarely" because there's always an exception, but the problem is everybody thinks they are the exception or in an exceptional situation. Most aren't.
/r/seduction01/05/26 05:07 PM
2

You're disagreeing because if magic existed it would be worth it? lol ok
/r/seduction01/05/26 05:03 PM
4

trying to change somebody's mind is rarely ever worth your time
/r/seduction01/05/26 04:10 PM
9

What does she speak? Learn a little bit of the language, she will think it's cute even if it's basic. Long term though language barrier usually causes head aches.
/r/seduction29/04/26 05:08 PM
1

idk man how are you sure she was into you?
/r/seduction29/04/26 02:26 AM
3

for me, it's eliminating the space between seeing and acting. The thinking is where you talk yourself out of it. It's hard but you can learn to stop thinking. For me I just keep it simple and say "hello" so I won't over think.
/r/seduction28/04/26 04:22 PM
1

all you have to say is "5pm at this bar work for you?" you're folding under 0 pressure lol
/r/seduction28/04/26 03:53 PM
4

People are different and a lot of sex is learning your partner, what they like and don't like etc. I'd say learn how to give head, enjoy foreplay, don't rush things, be vocal, don't be afraid to take the lead.
/r/seduction25/04/26 05:17 PM
3

How is it needy? They made plans the day before, id rather confirm so I can plan my day same as I would with a friend
/r/seduction25/04/26 03:44 PM
7

You are allowed to send a follow up text. "Did you still wanna meet up tonight?". Remember, you're a person whose time matters too, you don't have to just wait around. Also it takes practice but learn how to distract yourself and not let your mind wander about what's going on with her.
/r/seduction25/04/26 02:54 PM
1

I would clarify to her that you're not looking for a relationship either, that you just had a good time. If you don't clarify she will assume and slow fade most likely. There's always a chance she just wanted a one and done or there's some reason she doesn't want to see you again beyond what she said, but doesn't hurt to clarify intentions.
/r/seduction22/04/26 04:45 PM
1

Small conservative towns, I felt like all the women my age were already in serious relationships and there were only a few single ones left who had their pick of the bunch. When I moved to a city, I felt the world open up. There were suddenly many single women, many of whom shared interests./views with me that I could not find in my conservative small town. I am an artsy type, so I def belong in cities and have the most pull in that kind of environment.
/r/seduction22/04/26 02:37 PM
1

1000% I was in small towns until i was like 22 and had very low self esteem due to hardly any women my age in my area, and the ones who were were all taken.
/r/seduction22/04/26 02:15 PM
1

sounds like you're looking for and manufacturing you're own excuse to quit
/r/seduction22/04/26 02:11 PM
0

I agree with what you're saying and maybe I need to rewrite this piece for clarity. I tried to use language like "this often means" or "this sometimes means", instead of "woman say this when they 100% mean that". My goal was to break through to men who take things not only literally, but also too seriously. People in general (not just women) talk hyperbolically or vaguely. My point is not to never take what people say seriously, but to learn discernment. I will consider your critique next time I…
/r/seduction22/04/26 01:56 PM
2

True, im an old head so less in touch with todays youth, although I will say I've had some of the most awkward interactions of my life lately with younger guys.
/r/seduction21/04/26 09:14 PM
5

Yes I agree with your examples, I more so put that because ironically people will take me overly literal and interpret my post as "never believe what she says and always press on"
/r/seduction21/04/26 08:24 PM
1

I think you're being...dare I say...overly literal
/r/seduction21/04/26 08:21 PM
5

I mean, there's a lot of things we have to cope with in life, it's not a bad word. For example, if a loved one dies you have to learn to cope with it and continue on in life, that doesn't mean your pain doesn't matter, its more like...what else can you do? I don't think these men you describe have to be "ok" with it by any means either, if I thouht they should be okay with it I wouldnt offer them any advice. Tbf, I think the person you're describing likely needs more help then reading a reddit p…
/r/seduction21/04/26 07:02 PM
5

So what should he do? Get revenge?
/r/seduction21/04/26 06:50 PM
1

Yeah, I use reddit as a testing grounds before I write something more substantial
/r/seduction21/04/26 06:49 PM
2

Damn, the universe put you on hardcore mode. You seem to have a good attitude though, these things can be learned
/r/seduction21/04/26 06:48 PM
3

I'm not trying to be mean, I don't think of being autistic as being an insult
/r/seduction21/04/26 06:47 PM
4

I'd say tread cautiously, sometimes I feel like they put that on their profile because they don't want horny spam from guys that want ONS. Doesn't mean that's always the case though.
/r/seduction21/04/26 06:45 PM
2

I used Claude to help me come up with examples because I blanked on that part but everything else was me
/r/seduction21/04/26 06:44 PM
12

That's an understandable reaction but getting outwordly angry and bitter will also assure that things stays that way
/r/seduction21/04/26 06:43 PM
2

>To make things more complicated, I'm also moving abroad soon and she has no idea. I genuinely had intentions to keep seeing her for a while so it's not like I was using her. Uh...what? Regardless, even if you didn't expect to lose attraction, you still hid the fact that you're moving because you knew it would effect her decision to sleep with you. So that actually is using her. >I'm even thinking of sleeping with her a few more times so that it comes easier to her, which I also think is a reall…
/r/seduction20/04/26 03:25 PM
1

You're just being nit picky bro. I'm the opposite, where I have to remember to smile because I forget I have a resting pissed-off face
/r/seduction20/04/26 03:15 PM
1

I mean any philosophy or world view could have its own spin on seduction just as any world view or philosophy could have a spin on anything else that exists in the world
/r/seduction15/04/26 04:28 PM
3

my issue rn is just knowing how fickle people can be, we're always on our best behavior in the early stages, it can be hard to know what massive flaws are hiding in plain sight, or issues that might mess up long term compatibility until it becomes a problem. I think that's where my current jaded status comes from, I've just seen so much deceit and hypocrisy from people, it's hard to believe anybody is being their whole authentic selves.
/r/seduction13/04/26 04:17 PM
3

I can relate to that. I feel I have also attracted women who like me have commitment issues and don't really stick it out that long with any one person.
/r/seduction13/04/26 03:50 PM
2

it aint trickin if you got it
/r/seduction13/04/26 03:41 PM
1

If you got it like that, why not? But don't blow your rainy day fund over it. I would totally fly someone out if I wouldn't miss the money.
/r/seduction13/04/26 03:40 PM
25

The old advice is "agree and amplify". So if somebody says you're boring youd say "Yeah I'm afraid to leave the house tbh". Generally though, I just laugh at these kind of comments. It's just banter, nothing to take that seriously, and you should be able to laugh at yourself anyway.
/r/seduction12/04/26 10:53 PM
32

You don't get it out of your system, if anything you get it in your system. At some point in your life you would have been over the moon to have sex at all. Then you start wanting to up your body count like it's a high score. It can become never ending. I can't really say if it's 'worth it' or not. Some of my friends did not date that much but seem to be pretty happily married now. I was prob the most promiscuous out of my friend group and idk, im pretty jaded and unlikely to marry at this point…
/r/seduction12/04/26 10:25 PM
1

sorry a lot of these posts bleed together I thought you were on some black pill shit
/r/seduction12/04/26 10:19 PM
3

This is a form of cope. Simplifying a problem to one aspect so you can either 1) focus on min-maxing that one thing or 2) Feel justified in admitting defeat when things don't work for you: "Well of course, I was born ugly, that's why!" Sure, obviously a hot guy who looks like a model is going to have an easier time seducing women, no shit. Just like a woman who's a model could have virtually any guy she wants. That's just life. Of course, it doesn't hurt to be fit, develop a sense of style, and …
/r/seduction12/04/26 10:13 PM
2

idk man, I thought of myself as ugly for a long time and could never get dates but it was a combo of a lot of things. Mainly: bad haircut, no sense of style (dressing like a teenager as an adult), and desperation/ tremendous insecurity. Personally, I don't think ugly is as big a block as most men think it is. Sure, guys who have chiseled jaws and are hunks will have an easier time, but like, that's life man. Most people are average, you're probably average.
/r/seduction09/04/26 04:41 PM
8

idk im the same way. If we're both interested we minds well just meet up and see if there's chemistry
/r/seduction09/04/26 03:25 AM
1

I think everyone can pull better irl unless they’re catfishing.
/r/seduction07/04/26 11:47 PM
1

It happens but I do think it's less common. I almost got with a woman who was 20 years older than me but it started feeling a little too weird the closer it came to us hooking up. She just felt like one of my mom's friends or something, I couldn't get into it
/r/seduction07/04/26 09:08 PM
28

MGTOW especially had this problem. Like, the premise isn't that bad, Men also rejecting the traditional gender roles and expectations of them, but then they have to make the whole thing about resentment towards women. I feel like so many MGTOW influencers (if they're still even a thing) were mostly all divorced men who clearly weren't over it.
/r/ExRedPill07/04/26 09:01 PM
1

It's not like they're clairvoyant, I can tell when somebody is insecure too, it's kind of obvious. Some signs off the top of my head: can't project voice (people never hear what you say), tense posture, seeming on edge and not relaxed, eyes look scared when talking, always seems to be awaiting your reaction before they show any emotion etc. There's not much advice I can give other than exposure. Everybody has some specific weak points unique to them. At the end of the day somebody confident is s…
/r/seduction07/04/26 08:47 PM
5

35m here, have lived a bit of a hobo's life and spent stints at my mom's house. I still brought girls home, I've never had them give me shit about it, in fact, I'm usually embarrassed and they're the ones saying it's fine. It's more about how much do you want your parents to know about your personal life or potentially hear you having sex.
/r/seduction06/04/26 11:56 PM
2

I'm 35 and I (slightly) regret how much time I spent chasing skirts as it were. I've made other mistakes too, but I think it was a contributing distraction to me not getting my financial shit together. You live and you learn. I guess it's just the same boring answer as always: it's about balance.
/r/seduction06/04/26 11:53 PM
55

Id say it looks dorky at best and corn-ballish at worst. I would keep that hobby to yourself. No shade, I like dorky shit too but doesn’t mean I’m going to do it on front of a woman haha
/r/seduction06/04/26 08:34 PM
7

Dog, you're trying to implant a thought in her mind? The CIA tried that already, it doesn't work. No offense but I think you're just being kind of cowardly and building a labyrinth around what is actually a pretty direct issue.
/r/seduction06/04/26 04:24 PM
8

instead of getting all mystical why not try being direct and authentic? "I want to maintain friendship but I can't continue like this, I'm sorry I have to be true to myself and what I can handle". It is what it is man, you can't always have your cake and eat it too. You can go down this weird path of indirectness but it's not going to work out how you want in the end and is more trouble than it's worth.
/r/seduction06/04/26 04:14 PM
4

>he said he hates all women and that " you are different". he seemed a gentleman Pure poetry right there. I think you should spend some time investigating where this savior complex in you comes from. There are guys out there who will respect you from the beginning that you won't have to "save"
/r/ExRedPill06/04/26 02:50 PM
–

Cars are more essential than sex bots, there is much more of an economic motor behind their advancement and proliferation. We built entire cities around cars, that's not the future of sex dolls. Part of why I'm unconvinced is how bad VR porn is. If you go on the internet archive and look up "cyber sex" you will see many old magazines from the 90s speculating that VR would revolutionize sex, but its current state is laughably bad. Could it get more advanced? Sure, but I don't see that in the near…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 01:22 AM
–

hot take: they won't catch on. I think it will be like real dolls, a committed and financially well-off minority will buy them. Maybe a few sad guys here and there will blow their emergency funds on one, but they will be disappointed because of The post-nut clarity. Only the most delusional men aren't going to feel some level of pathetic of dropping all that money to fuck a robot that is honestly creepy looking They will realize what a lot of real sex-havers realize: half the time you can nut mo…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 10:28 PM
0

i was going to say I don't believe unless you had some kind of crippling sex addiction
/r/seduction02/04/26 04:11 AM
0

so where did the numbers come from?
/r/seduction02/04/26 03:33 AM
1

have you ever had a long term relationship?
/r/seduction02/04/26 02:45 AM
0

35m i honestly stopped counting after around 30, if i had to guess id say around 50 or so.
/r/seduction02/04/26 02:29 AM
3

you feel there's too much to lose, you care about your standing too much etc. With people you're unattracted to there's no risk in your mind. My only advice is to get more secure in yourself, try to be more confident in taking risks by being yourself and risking rejection.
/r/seduction01/04/26 07:07 PM
2

99% of the time this doesn't end up working unless she takes the brunt of the initiative and you're lucky enough to be included.
/r/seduction01/04/26 04:54 PM
1

We've all grown older
/r/seduction01/04/26 04:22 PM
1

Ive noticed sometimes in small towns I have better luck because everybody knows everybody so I'm a clean slate (don't know any gossip or involved with anybody). I personally wouldn't make it a numbers thing. I just go out and try my luck, win lose or draw. I mainly just try to have a good time.
/r/seduction31/03/26 09:13 PM
2

Texting can work fine. I feel like the bigger issue here is your relationship with her. Like, was this a professional event and you have her number solely for professional reasons? If that's the case, tread very carefully, especially if you weren't flirting throughout the event planning. Have you kept up with her at all? Was this a while ago? If so, asking her out would be more like a cold call with low chance of success. Hopefully this was recent enough that you're still in her memory and/or yo…
/r/seduction31/03/26 05:48 PM
4

Do what you can to look good yourself: nice clothes that fit, good haircut/grooming, stylish glasses (if you wear glasses), gym doesn't hurt (don't have to go crazy), the basics etc. Proactive: Go where single women go. I live in a big city and there are a shit ton of single women out here, if I go out to the bars, they pretty much dwarf the amount of men who are out. In my case at least, it's as easy as making eye contact, smiling, and just saying hi / starting a conversation. Passive: Get in t…
/r/seduction31/03/26 03:10 PM
8

Not really, it ended on bad terms, I felt more so betrayed and disappointed then like I fumbled her
/r/seduction31/03/26 02:05 PM
208

I will say that my last gf was very attractive. She would be constantly flirted with everywhere we went, and she was very aware and proud of her good looks. We broke up after two years together, it was quite devastating. Now, I am back to dating, and seeing somebody who is nearly the opposite. She doesn't get approached much or turn heads, in fact people can be quite rude to her (pretty privilege). I gotta say, I actually enjoy the difference with dating her. She's very funny, very down to earth…
/r/seduction31/03/26 03:30 AM
56

Nobody wants to feel settled for or like a last resort. At the same time, this might sound fucked up, but I find very attractive people to be kind of exhausting to date. They tend to be entitled and always have options. People who are less traditionally attractive I find to be more real and usually more fun tbh. Just don’t be an asshole and treat them like crap
/r/seduction29/03/26 05:26 PM
23

Not to dog pile you OP, but not only should you avoid restaurant dates for the reasons other commenters mentioned, but also because it puts a lot of expectation (pressure) on the date. It's not ideal, many women will back out. Try something more casual.
/r/seduction29/03/26 01:47 AM
1

If she stops talking to you she's not interested for one reason or another. You could always throw a hail marry for the hell of it, but better to move on.
/r/seduction25/03/26 08:05 PM
1

Reminds me of this guy slept with 1,000 women in one year https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_3APjV8RNE
/r/seduction24/03/26 04:06 PM
10

If nobody can follow what youre trying to say that’s on you
/r/ExRedPill24/03/26 04:22 AM
18

people are really commenting on this post to act like they don’t know what I mean by “peak” “I wrote something dumb and now everyone’s saying I’m dumb” :( You realize surveys aren’t considered rigorous science right? You can live your life confirming whatever bias you want to but don’t be surprised when people think you’re dumb for it lol
/r/ExRedPill24/03/26 03:49 AM
4

Im 35 and I feel like the mid 20s women are more into me then women my age. I didn’t grind my twenties away though, and I definitely do not look at those years as my peak by any metric. I think this topic is just naval gazing tbh. To define peak, we need to define a metric, and already you’re going to have different peaks at different ages, which are unbeknownst to you because you don’t know when you’re going to die. Even if you could say definitively “men peak at 26”. What does it benefit me to…
/r/ExRedPill24/03/26 02:28 AM
2

Tends to mean they dont want to have random sex and don't want a bunch of dick pics but they just want to see somebody casually as in non-committal and short term. Or they simply don't know what they want.
/r/seduction23/03/26 07:32 PM
2

She tried you out and lost interest
/r/seduction23/03/26 07:22 PM
2

First mistake is taking anything on here as authoritative
/r/seduction23/03/26 04:21 PM
1

You can ease into it by doing low risk approaches. You can ask a random person the time for example. Another one is to give random compliments without stopping them to talk. This can give you exposure in a lower stress way. You may find that a conversation even naturally flows from it. Worth a try.
/r/seduction23/03/26 04:28 AM
20

confidence is one of those "easier said than done" things. I agree, I'd even say confidence is everything, but teaching somebody to have confidence is very difficult. People often think it looks one distinct way, but the reality is that everybody's confident self will be a bit different. >just talking with them as normal This has been my revelation as well. I've gotten better results in dating from just becoming a more gregarious person in general. It's like the advice "be yourself". It's not go…
/r/seduction23/03/26 04:24 AM
1

Educate yourself, like i said. Read a book. Making sweeping generalizations (resentful ones at that) about half the population is illogical. Life will probably humble you on its own some day anyway, or maybe you'll never learn your lesson and grow old and bitter.
/r/seduction20/03/26 06:16 PM
2

The one where you resent women... >But I have no idea how to fix these, or if all of these are just symptoms of a deeper underlying issue. I can't fake my personality because it is exhausting. It takes a lot of energy and it is painful to do so. It feels inauthentic and like I'm cheating myself. You can't 'fake' it, you need to resolve your issues with women, which you don't even consider, hence me using the term 'rigid'.
/r/seduction20/03/26 06:11 PM
2

"the thing with women..." oh come on, are you going to tell a woman she's ugly if thats the reason you're not into her? "I can give off a negative aura...resentment towards women" accurate self diagnosis "Opinionated, argumentative, and take myself too seriously..." yeah, that'll do it "Instead of sternly opposing them" yes, you should not be "sternly opposing" somebody you're trying to seduce...that's how you treat somebody you despise. At least you know what the problem is. Idk man, I think yo…
/r/seduction20/03/26 06:05 PM
2

thats some good self awareness man, not many people have it
/r/seduction20/03/26 01:32 AM
1

You might need professional help, no shame in it, I've gone to therapy before, but what you're experiencing isn't normal
/r/seduction19/03/26 06:20 PM
1

Have you done anything that could actually warrant any of these scenarios? If not, you might need to see a psychiatrist, sounds like my friend who has OCD
/r/seduction19/03/26 05:35 PM
1

Literally just say it bro
/r/seduction19/03/26 03:29 PM
3

I typically have gotten nudes from people I was already seeing/hooking up with. Sometimes I'd get a friendly one, but I feel like women don't get as horny over text the way men do. That kind of boldness, especially through social media, doesn't work for most people. Unless you're particularly attractive and she is particularly open to sending nudes, I don't see it working for the average guy. Most guys make the mistake of doing 99% of their flirting and approaching online / through apps. How bol…
/r/seduction19/03/26 03:09 PM
6

There's nothing to back up your claim that "redpill guys tend to have more hookups", there's plenty of incels, lame divorced guys, and other types of losers in those communities as well that don't even talk to women. It's easier to date multiple women when you don't respect them. If you care about their feelings and respect them, you're probably not going to be sleeping around unless its a mutual understanding. I've never seen the glory in continuing the cycle of abuse...so this girl had an abse…
/r/ExRedPill19/03/26 02:45 PM
4

It's bad advice if you are a hard case newbie, neurodivergent, or below average in social skill. It's good to learn the "rules" a sub like this will direct you towards in the beginning. However, after you've learned what for some people comes naturally, "be yourself" starts being good advice again.
/r/seduction18/03/26 07:36 PM
7

Lmao, bro it’s work…I would help a female coworker lift something the same I would help an elderly man who couldn’t lift something. This is such a crazy example
/r/seduction18/03/26 07:16 PM
2

Your conclusion is correct. I don't really start taking somebody seriously until we've established a semblance of a relationship (past initial courtship and some kind of regular seeing eachother). While in courtship, I try to keep our interactions in person as much as possible. You don't want to tip the balance to where the majority of your relationship is online/through text. If we're flirting, I try to take it to meeting up fairly early (strike while the iron is hot). I won't cut her off immed…
/r/seduction18/03/26 06:50 PM
1

>that was actually fun but everyone was there with a partner already. That's why I said just do it because it's fun and that "I would be shocked if you didn't eventually meet a single woman"
/r/seduction17/03/26 08:52 PM
1

This is kind of what I mean by taking advice too literally. I'm not saying don't be direct, but more so to have some social awareness. On the friend thing...You do you, but I think this is also a literal-thinking issue. Here's a quick story. I met a girl a couple years ago, thought she was cute but logistically it didn't make sense to pursue. Still thought she was cool, added on IG, we're "friends" in title, but that doesn't mean I'm messaging her all the time or asking her to go shopping etc. M…
/r/seduction17/03/26 08:49 PM
6

I feel like tinder is just more general. I think tends to lean more casual, but you could ostensibly find anything. I feel like bumble (at least in my experience) tends to be more that put-together, career-driven, family-oriented types.
/r/seduction17/03/26 01:37 AM
5

>Unless you hit on every single girl in the hobby group, or are visibly creepy That's what is being discussed
/r/seduction16/03/26 09:26 PM
4

Its not the worst option, I'm not really a hater on the apps. I just see a lot of guys get discouraged, as long as you don't get over invested you'll be fine
/r/seduction16/03/26 09:12 PM
44

They nerfed the hell out of all the apps. I remember when tinder first introduced gold, it was great. You just paid once and you had unlimited swipes, and priority in the deck and super likes that recharged every day or week (something like that). Anyway, now tinder has three different tiers and even at the highest tier you still have to pay for the boosts. Obviously its a business so they've just chased revenue, but now it feels next to useless. Like another poster said, apps should be a second…
/r/seduction16/03/26 08:37 PM
11

No shade intended, takes one to know one
/r/seduction16/03/26 08:21 PM
2

Some can be chocked up to cultural differences. I know that in a lot of latin american countries, sex isn't that big a deal and it can be a bit backwards from what people in the US are used to. A brazillian friend once told me "For us, we have sex first. Theeen, if you really like them you start dating"
/r/seduction16/03/26 06:05 PM
0

Its not really about doing anything right or wrong on a date. It's more about feeling out mutual chemistry. She likely just wasn't feeling it and found it easier to ghost you then explain. Online dating makes it easier to meet people but also just as easy to ghost people. Personally, I treat online dating very casually for this reason.
/r/seduction16/03/26 05:51 PM
32

Everybody realizes it right away, even the other men, and then it turns into this weird thing where the new guys being creepy and everybody politely dismisses / ignores him until he gets the hint and leaves
/r/seduction16/03/26 05:28 PM
23

The problem with guys like you is that you think very literally. You think A + B = C, and get frustrated when socializing, romance, and seduction don't follow a rigid formula. People don't tell you to join clubs because it's part of a step by step process that guarantees sex, they tell you to do that so that you get into the mix, grow your network, socialize more. I've thought about joining a community garden myself, and not to get laid (most people would find that a strange motivation), but to …
/r/seduction16/03/26 05:23 PM
0

that gives us about 0 real info to go off of, so the only advice you're going to get is generic. First and foremost, be attractive, don't be unattractive. Second, don't conceal your intentions or play coy. I'm not saying lay it on thick, but I will do some combination of eye contact, complimenting, touching etc if I like someone. Better to have your advances rejected earlier on rather than try to do a trojan horse play
/r/seduction16/03/26 03:16 PM
1

Sounds like you resent him, stop hanging out with him
/r/seduction16/03/26 02:56 PM
30

It's not worth making your main goal in life
/r/seduction12/03/26 03:44 AM
1

I feel like even people who have success on it don't obsess over it. I think a lot of guys drive themselves crazy because it's their ONLY outlet for meeting and talking to women. If you treat it casually, it can be great. If you obsess, you're going to spend too much time, money, and energy on it and be frustrated at the end
/r/seduction10/03/26 10:11 PM
2

It's not always what you say but how you say it. There's a way to say you just want to 'play' (in your words) without it being demeaning or rude. Also, no matter how you phrase it, it's possible she doesn't want something casual, which you have to accept and take in stride. If you are honest that you want casual, she says she doesn't, and you lie to get sex, then you are the bad guy in this situation. You can try to justify it and blame other women for hurting you, but it doesn't negate the fact…
/r/seduction04/03/26 05:42 PM
3

Have you ever seen pictures of a girl your seeing's ex and he looks like you? That happens to me a lot. I have blonde/red hair, wear glasses, and have a mustache, I realize this a "type" for some girls, and so I always get girls who like that kind of guy
/r/seduction02/03/26 07:59 PM
1

thats insanely expensive, i feel like a coach could be worth it but theres gotta be someone cheaper than that
/r/seduction01/03/26 10:28 PM
6

it doesnt ALWAYS end bad, but it often does. Make sure its not somebody you have to interact with every day or work alongside with. I've hooked up with various coworkers but the worst was when I was a bartender and hooked up with a server. It was fine but then she got promoted to bartending and next thing I knew we were working side by side trapped behind a bar all night like three times a week. It got weird and toxic fast.
/r/seduction01/03/26 10:00 PM
179

Sometimes things have power because you give them power. If someone asked for my ig I wouldn't be asking myself if it was a shit test, I'd probably just tell them my ig and think nothing of it. Sometimes it's easier to keep in touch via instagram IME.
/r/seduction28/02/26 06:08 AM
4

"most men live lives of quiet desperation" type beat
/r/seduction27/02/26 07:38 PM
1

Don't get jargon-brained. She's not interested. She's not feeling it. If someone goes cold on me like that I'd just move on. Somebody here will argue that you could salvage it but I think it's kind of pathetic to try to change somebodys mind.
/r/seduction25/02/26 07:39 PM
18

Im pretty distrusting of relationship "science" but I do feel its pretty true that passion typically only lasts a year at most. I think long-lasting relationships (at least the ones I've seen) succeed because both are like-minded in the fact they want a long term life partner (not just passion-driven but someone to live with and establish something together). I used to be of the mind that money doesn't matter, as long as we love eachother it will work blah blah. Now, I've come to find that if lo…
/r/seduction25/02/26 06:55 PM
2

acting like an xman mutant haunted by your new found powers lmao chill out man its not that serious, the world just doesn't work the way you thought it did before. Youll adjust
/r/seduction24/02/26 09:02 PM
1

Whats the point? Unless you just like the thrill of the chase that much. I feel like life is much easier just going for people who like you off the rip
/r/seduction18/02/26 09:02 PM
1

Yeah I'm not too old, I should really say I'm just in an arc where I'm focusing on myself and I have one fwb which is enough for me rn
/r/seduction14/02/26 10:18 PM
51

A girl I'm hooking up with told me her friends are all having guy problems and going to crash out tonight. If I was younger I'd be going out.
/r/seduction14/02/26 09:59 PM
1

Dude, don’t. I guarantee you would make her feel weird and uncomfortable
/r/seduction14/02/26 04:58 PM
4

also many women have traumatic responses to attempts to control them
/r/seduction11/02/26 02:29 AM
3

Ive been the other man before, it's not worth it. She has major issues if she's the type to cheat, and once the horniness clears you will see it very obviously
/r/seduction10/02/26 09:18 PM
2

People are being negative but I had a very positive time when I was in NYC, I found it very easy to talk to people. New Yorkers are known to be standoffish but so many of them are transplants anyway. Just put yourself out there and try to talk to people. You're from a different country, that alone is unlimited things to talk about. Idk if they'll let you into bars at 18, but barhopping would be the best choice. Maybe someone who actually lives in NYC can further direct you.
/r/seduction10/02/26 12:23 AM
5

in a nutshell men have sex to impress other men a lot of the time
/r/seduction09/02/26 05:37 PM
14

If you ask me, it's like anywhere else. I'm friendly and outgoing, tend to naturally scan whatever space I'm in and make eye contact with people. Over time you recognize when people are checking you out or want to be approached. I've trained myself to be outgoing so (if it's a place I go to frequently like a gym) I'll start slow, knowing I'll likely see them again. One day I might nod at them in acknowledgement, the next I might say something inoccuous "working hard today!" whatever dumb comment…
/r/seduction07/02/26 11:51 PM
–

I know this is Southpark, but it's a mentality some men actually have and it's quite sad/cynical because there's a presumption that all the man wants is the kiss (sex/intimacy), and the relationship is purely transactional. I think that's a sad way to go through life personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/26 03:57 AM
1

Ive had opposite issues through out my life. I could hook up and date without improving myself at all. So I was an overweight alcoholic who smoked cigarettes and had drug problems but I got laid...cool! (sarcasm)
/r/seduction06/02/26 03:55 AM
2

To your first question, well if it's a mutual understanding and it's cool, then it's cool. I'm not the type to lead somebody on or in your words put them on the hook or the "fuck zone" as you say. I think I take more issue with the word "friend zone" itself. In your second section, you are describing a man that is over investing in somebody who isn't available (emotionally or otherwise). I think the only failure on the guy's part isn't 'maintaining sexual chemistry' but it's more that he's wasti…
/r/seduction04/02/26 05:40 PM
22

Digital Ice agents? Time to log off and touch grass bro, jesus christ
/r/seduction04/02/26 04:49 PM
1

I agree with your point about "neutral" situations. You should make your interest and intent clear from the beginning or you're going to confuse them.
/r/seduction04/02/26 03:28 PM
23

idk man, I think the friendzone is bs on a certain level. If somebody's attracted to you, they're not going to just 'lose' the attraction because you're being yourself...what kind of messed up logic is that? I'm always going to go for being myself, because why would I want to be in a relationship where I have to constantly have up a false front? In my mind, if you're in the "friend zone" it's because she wasn't into you anyway
/r/seduction04/02/26 02:41 PM
0

I guess i think of cold appraoch as something you more so do at a club or when out in typically alcoholic drinking environments. I guess I "cold approach" if you count striking up conversation with strangers when I'm out and about.
/r/seduction02/02/26 09:21 PM
-2

Honestly, even when randos approach me it's 50/50 if I'm in the mood to talk to a stranger
/r/seduction02/02/26 06:50 PM
0

For me, it never felt worth it. Here and there I'd get a one night stand, but most of the time it never amounted to anything more. Much more often it was just an awkward experience. I'm not even really into having random sex these days. The STD risk kinda freaks me out and not knowing if the person is a psycho or not. I take more of a friendly approach now, which I feel like is always looked down upon in subs like these, but I much prefer it. I want to at least vibe check a person and get to kno…
/r/seduction02/02/26 06:44 PM
125

Walk up to her "UNGHGHH" shit on the floor, walk away
/r/seduction02/02/26 05:44 PM
14

No, don't wait. Put yourself out there. Bettering your life should be your number one priority though, dating is tertiary. Be frank about your situation, don't be ashamed. It's only shameful if you're leaching and not even trying to better your situation. Some women will care, others won't, I might even go as far as to say most won't.
/r/seduction01/02/26 07:15 PM
3

you don't know what you don't know. The girls that rejected you could have been there with a boyfried/situationship, it could have been a girl's night where going home with someone wasn't on anyone's mind, maybe they just lacked social skills and felt too nervous to reciprocate, maybe they just got broken up with...etc I know the axiom is to only worry about what you can control, but on the other hand, it doesn't matter how good of a flirter or a looker you are, there are times when someone is u…
/r/seduction01/02/26 06:59 PM
2

Not all 10/10s are gold diggers. I've dated really attractive women, sometimes it's a pain in the ass. They're constantly getting hit on, they know that can leave you whenever they want, everybody's constantly offering something to them. It's a little over rated tbh. In other words, I think you need to take hot women off the pedestal because even if you bagged one, you'd be the dog that caught the garbage truck and not know what to do with yourself afterwards. You're right "be yourself" doesn't …
/r/seduction31/01/26 11:19 PM
1

I feel like ghosting is very common practice in NYC. They prob just weren't feeling it for whatever reason, the kiss and saying they had a good time might have just been polite, or they really could have gotten busy and then time goes on and they move on.
/r/seduction29/01/26 05:05 PM
2

If you're going to ask her back out then I'd fess up that you were annoyed at her comment.
/r/seduction27/01/26 08:51 PM
2

idk...I don't mean any offense by this but it comes off as neurotic to me, at the very least it seems like rigid thinking. In my opinion, rigidity is a turn off, and flexibility (going with the flow) is more attractive. Maybe I'm wrong, maybe you disagree, but that's what comes across to me
/r/seduction26/01/26 10:03 PM
1

yeah sure, but why no walking dates? It just threw me off as strange is all
/r/seduction26/01/26 09:46 PM
1

Usually when I have a first date with someone, I choose something that can be ended quickly (if there's no chemistry) but can also be elongated if it's going well. Something like coffee, or tea, or a snack. Bonus points if it's nice, I don't really see why there'd be a "no walking dates" rule. I feel like that's stifling. you can be like "hey it's nice out do you want to walk a bit?" Then while you're walking around (granted you live somewhere walkable) you may stumble upon a bar or a third loca…
/r/seduction26/01/26 08:49 PM
1

Short Answer: Saying "one thing lead to another" at times is just a way of skipping through the details because the person saying this is just an average joe, not an erotica writer. The issue with people like you (no offense OP, I was very much like this too), is that you want a literal step-by-step guide on how to seduce a woman as if it was a process as straight forward as replacing a transmission or fixing a sink. The thing is, it's more of a dance, it's intuitive, which makes it very frustra…
/r/seduction26/01/26 05:20 PM
2

just some advice: don't get this molecular and analytical with what people say to you. You're better off assuming she's interested until proven otherwise (within reason).
/r/seduction26/01/26 05:09 PM
3

Living my dream life traveling and learning languages
/r/seduction26/01/26 08:05 AM
1

Youre moving pretty fast, you should be more careful but too late for that. Hope it works out
/r/seduction25/01/26 02:42 PM
4

This happens to me a lot. In my case it's because I'm naturally thoughtful and kind. This isn't 100% true all the time, but I think a lot of women find it easier to hook up with somebody who's physically attractive but with a personality they don't like. It's easier to not catch feelings that way.
/r/seduction22/01/26 03:17 PM
3

Outcome independence may be the single biggest take away. You need to be very chill and confident. Unaffected by a "rejection" you don't even see it as a rejection, you're just bold enough to put your intentions out there and that person wasn't interested, you'll find someone who is though but you're not pressed about it.
/r/seduction21/01/26 07:38 PM
1

Idk man, you seem like you have a good barometer. It would be one thing if you weren't escalating with anyone, but you have and you had success. You might just be right in your thought that certain women you've been with weren't interested, it happens. Only practical advice I could give is to start off small with someone whose harder to read. Put your hand on her shoulder or the top of her back as that isn't considered invasive touch, and she will get the hint that you're interested. From there …
/r/seduction19/01/26 04:36 PM
1

yeah i guess thems the breaks. I don't really blame them tbh, most guys having one night stands are prioritizing their own pleasure and unless she's the rare type that can orgasm from penetration, she's probably not gonna be all that satisfied
/r/seduction17/01/26 10:15 PM
1

Idk, ive probably gotten laid more than any other man in my blood line. We still have it easy in that regard, I wouldn't bemoan it too much
/r/seduction17/01/26 10:00 PM
10

i dont think its going anywhere bro. You gotta think, hooking up has been a part of popular culture in the USA since the 60s, and even before then people were still having casual sex, it was just taboo. If anything I'd say it's evolved. After the pandemic bars and restaurants have done a lot worse, people have less expendable income as well. I think this means there's likely less drunk hooking up, but honestly that's for the best. I think the situationship, and blurred lines between friendship a…
/r/seduction17/01/26 09:43 PM
1

Not imo. I think riding the line between friendly and romantic intentions actually creates tension which is good. Sometimes it seems most logical to put all your cards on the table, but in my experience that can often scare women off, or make them think you're too serious instead of fun. While your interaction might have felt really amazing, you gotta think that women, especially attractive women, have conversations like that fairly often without attaching much meaning to them. While you might b…
/r/seduction17/01/26 06:44 PM
3

dont over think it, you can even disregard that she said she'd hit you up on whatsapp. Give it a few days or till the new week and then just offer a quick line "Hey I'm free wed/thur this week, theres this new middle eastern spot ive been wanting to check out if you're game".
/r/seduction17/01/26 06:06 PM
1

You should get her on your preferred platform from the beginning, why ask for insta and then ask for whatsapp later? You're already talking to her, just say it there. (this is kind of minor but worth improving) Like other commenters mentioned, I wouldn't count on her making the move, that's pretty much always going to be on us. Just be casual, don't try to lock her in too hard to a set date (i know this feels like the logical thing to do but you want to come off chill). Just offer meet ups casua…
/r/seduction17/01/26 06:03 PM
1

trust your gut and be natural. If you're busy/don't feel like it, don't. You can still smile and acknowledge her. I'm assuming you'll be seeing more of her if you both go there alot which changes things ie if it was a random encounter you may push more initially.
/r/seduction16/01/26 10:20 PM
1

Well you’ve already kind of hung out it sounds like therefore it’s not that weird to approach her now and act familiar, you already broke the ice. Just say hi and talk like normal and then ask her out. I mean, read the room if she looks super locked in and stressed maybe don’t sit down with her. I’m a bit passive in my approaches but I always ride the line of friendly/interested. Takes the pressure off, you have plausible deniability that youre just being nice, and even if she rejects your advan…
/r/seduction16/01/26 09:49 PM
4

Ngl it was hard to understand the middle section of your post. If I were you i wouldn’t change up my study habits just because of her, studies come first, however, if you’re interested in her I’d make a move sooner rather than later now that you’ve thoroughly broken the ice. Could be as easy as asking her what she’s doing after and asking her to get coffee or a drink or what have you
/r/seduction16/01/26 09:36 PM
2

I personally wouldn't try to have sex with someone who's sick because I find that gross, but do you. Just look up "escalation" and "kino" basic idea is to start with safe touch like shoulders, top of back, etc, and based off her reaction (enthusiasm/shrinking away) either escalate or deescalate. Hopefully she won't have a bunch of mucus lol
/r/seduction15/01/26 05:43 PM
1

Yes but take it all with a grain of salt, don't get too invested in the community because there is a lot of blind leading the blind. The general advice that has lasted over time is solid. I think its best for people who are hard case newbies, like struggle with socializing in general. Once you get to a point that you have confidence and can talk to strangers including women you're attracted to without turning to mush, you're good. While many men dream of being players, most actually don't really…
/r/seduction13/01/26 04:40 PM
1

It’s a “you have to learn the rules before you break them” situation. A lot of the “rules” are just for hard case newbies who socializing doesn’t come naturally for. Once you get to a certain level you can basically forget all the rules.
/r/seduction12/01/26 11:24 PM
1

Being hotter isn't going to attract more stable people if that's what you're getting at. Don't worry about that kind of thing. You either have a face card or you don't, there's not much you can do to get one if you don't have one besides lose weight and practice better grooming/skincare. It's not as important as men tend to treat it. Sure the hottest guys have an easier time, but most guys aren't the hottest guys and still do fine, so it's whatever man.
/r/seduction12/01/26 06:04 PM
1

people say dating sucks now but its the same as its always been imo except dating apps suck now in the sense that you have to pay for them to work and then pay even more for them to be good.
/r/seduction09/01/26 04:38 AM
1

oh fuck yeah you're on the ball good for you dude
/r/seduction09/01/26 02:03 AM
3

Think about priorities man, you're talking to multiple people and still going to hit up your ex? I hope you're putting the same time and energy into things that matter like money, stability, your future etc (advice from an older guy who didn't)
/r/seduction08/01/26 08:54 PM
2

I feel you my gassy brother. Not much you can do but hold it in and excuse yourself to the bathroom to fart when you need to.
/r/seduction08/01/26 03:43 PM
1

Here's three very easy ways to flirt. 1. Compliment. I usually try to pick out something specific and intentional that they've done with their appearance. IE "Your hair is beautiful", "Your outfit is cute", "Your make up is gorgeous", "You have such a great smile". Most women are pretty insecure about their looks and put a lot of effort into it, so even these small compliments can do a lot. 2. Make Her Laugh Humor. Pretty much all women value this 3. Use Touch Start with innocuous touch like the…
/r/seduction07/01/26 04:41 PM
1

So she talked about potentially coming back to your place in the future and you're saying you didn't flirt? Look, not every woman is going to have sex on the first date, if she's talking about doing it at all, that's a good sign and just shows it's going to happen when the time is right. You don't know what's going on in her personal life, or if she's on her period, or just wants to know you better first. You sound like an overthinker, the best thing you can do in these situations is forget abou…
/r/seduction07/01/26 04:26 PM
1

Outcome independence i think is the single most important factor
/r/seduction07/01/26 04:23 PM
8

Big time doubt lmao
/r/seduction07/01/26 12:47 PM
6

Charge it to the game. I honestly don't like gaming in drinking environments because people often go out when they're in a mood and then they completely flip the next day when the alcohol wears off.
/r/seduction06/01/26 10:57 PM
1

ok. Im kinda just throwing things at the wall here... Do you feel you are engaging? Do you think they're having fun on the dates? I used to get ghosted left and right even after hooking up sometimes. For me it was because I was obsessive, and also didn't have much going on in my life, I think I came off a bit dull and like a guy without direction. You did say yourself that you could be obsessive on hinge. Do you think that could explain some of the disinterest?
/r/seduction05/01/26 05:40 PM
1

ah, well there you go. I always tell people to start off with safe touch like on the shoulders/top of the back while making a joke. She will pick up on the fact that you're trying to be physical but it can still be played off as friendly if she's not interested.
/r/seduction05/01/26 03:51 PM
1

Do you think you come off obsessive/desperate? That’s my only thought based on you saying you obsessed over the app for hours
/r/seduction05/01/26 12:20 AM
1

40 first dates? Are you exaggerating or being serious? That's nearly 1 a week, I find it hard to believe you're good looking / smooth enough to be dating that much but haven't managed to have sex or find someone interested in you. I can only think to ask you, what do you think is the problem?
/r/seduction04/01/26 07:04 PM
1

Take the pressure off and just work on being more social in general. If you start greeting and making small talk with people in general, it'll take the fear off doing it with someone you find attractive.
/r/seduction03/01/26 05:06 PM
-1

this such a dumb argument dude lets spare ourselves
/r/seduction03/01/26 03:51 PM
-1

Im not surprised that some men are sex pests, that’s the least surprising thing Ive ever heard lol
/r/seduction03/01/26 02:59 PM
5

Pay attention to what I wrote. If you start a book club to get laid you're weird sorry. The boss prob didn't have the ambition to be the boss just to get laid.
/r/seduction03/01/26 04:09 AM
13

If you do any of these things with the goal of getting laid, you are probably not a good person. More over, you don’t have to do any of that to get laid. Good advice to learn social skills and meet more people but don’t be weird lol
/r/seduction03/01/26 01:12 AM
13

Shoot your shot, don’t be pen pals forever. If she’s into you it won’t matter how you phrase it. I’d say something “Hey I’ve been wanting to ask you out, do you wanna get coffee sometime”. Worse case scenario she’s flattered but declines.
/r/seduction03/01/26 01:01 AM
–

Not a misunderstanding, a misconception. I’m saying I don’t buy that there’s a large contingent of women who view video games as a deal breaker and automatically makes a guy immature. I think most of this is like the experience my sister shared with me. That it’s more so a turn off when it’s all a guy has going on outside of work.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/25 12:10 AM
–

I think there's a misconception. My sister recently told me she rejected a guy but it wasn't because he plays video games, but because it sounded like it's nearly all he does. ie, she asked him what he does in his free time and he said he plays video games. Comparing that statement to the rest of their interaction she lost interest because he seems like all he does is go to work and play games. It's like someone who just watches TV, she wants someone who's active or more creative in their down t…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/25 11:28 PM
12

Idk man, are you in a city? Maybe its not a big enough pool where you're at, or just not an ideal environment for you? My other thought is you might just be picky, I find older women attractive personally, especially grey streaks, and just being more experienced and wise is a turn on for me.
/r/seduction30/12/25 08:14 PM
33

Whats your goal? A life partner or casual fun? If casual fun, then nothing wrong with younger women. If you want somebody to be with you and support you throughout the different stages of life then you're going to have to get over your feelings because aging takes its toll on everyone.
/r/seduction30/12/25 07:56 PM
5

Tension is the lingering feeling in the air of "will we? Won't we?" Flirting I consider more overt like "you look cute" etc. I find tension builds up naturally for me because I'm pretty respectful of people's boundaries and potential triggers to touch, so this often gets interpreted by women as me being hard to read, or unsure if I'm attracted to them. I actually just hooked up with somebody a couple days ago and while I figured form the get-go she was interested in hooking up (invited me to sle…
/r/seduction30/12/25 07:53 PM
9

Do you only have eyes for her? I think everybody looks. I don't know your relationship but if she's making it obvious because she knows it upsets you then I'd consider that a redflag. Hard to know what she thinks without talking to her about it though. So I'd start there, just be vulnerable and bring it up. If she's toxic and doesn't respect you being honest then leave. Just my two cents
/r/ExRedPill30/12/25 07:47 PM
96

Hey man you approached, that's like the hardest part. You'll likely see her again and the ice is broken so you can make friendly small talk and see where it goes
/r/seduction30/12/25 05:03 PM
1

At least you've identified the psychological barriers, a lot of people don't even realize that they suffer from low self-esteem and thinking they're unworthy. You're still quite young although it may not feel like it, you have time and you're on the right track.
/r/seduction29/12/25 11:08 PM
1

Leading people on is no good, I get it though, it's hard not to be selfish at times. You may like the attention your getting, or feel like if you're honest you'll get dropped and miss out on that person. I try to manage people's expectations, if they seem like they're falling for me and I have no intention to be serious with them, I will talk to them about it, I'm not trying to hurt anyone's feelings especially if they're cool and I respect them. People don't have a right to be mad in the beginn…
/r/seduction29/12/25 11:03 PM
3

Its only human on some level but you gotta keep it in check. Even if you find what you think you're looking for, your likely just going to keep repeating your cycle and end up where you are now again. For me, I'm not pursuing dating with much energy. I'm hooking up with someone that's chill and that's enough to satisfy me while I work on the bigger picture of getting financial and career stability in my life. If you're anything like me, lacking that stability is what will always sabotage you in …
/r/seduction29/12/25 06:10 PM
4

no offense man but sounds like you got deeper issues if your nearly 40 and having money issues yet you seem compulsively obsessed with sleeping with women. Priorities man. Do you wanna be broke in your 50s? Your 60s? This comes from a place of love, I'm having to focus on myself rn too.
/r/seduction29/12/25 05:24 PM
1

They’re not for everyone. I have never pulled in a night club, i dont like crowds, can’t talk or understand anyone in all the noise, I’m also just not that hot to pull on looks alone. I’m much more a charmer, I’d rather meet people organically and go on dates. No shade to those who like club, I’m just not built for it
/r/seduction28/12/25 12:26 AM
1

You might not be an amazing kisser but you likely won’t be horrible either.
/r/seduction25/12/25 11:44 PM
5

Son of divorced parents. They stayed together until me and my sister moved out. I realize now in adulthood that having two miserable people who dont love eachother as a model of relationships wasn’t great for my development. I’d have rather they tried to be happy rather than kid themselves that staying together was some how for “our sake”
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/25 11:31 PM
2

At some point we have to stand up for ourselves and our wants and needs. Take it from me, it’s not good to set the precedent of keeping your desires/limits to yourself. If someone respects you they’ll respect you being real
/r/seduction25/12/25 11:10 PM
10

Obv your heart/dick wants her bad, but this is a situation I’d tell you to use your head (the other one). If she’s setting a boundary that she won’t have sex, there’s little to nothing you’re going to do to change her mind. At best she might get in a mood one day and hook up once and then never do it again. Obv I don’t know her but I’ve known of girls who can’t sleep alone/ crave the security and oxytocin of cuddling. She might even just get off that you want her so bad, and she doesn’t want to …
/r/seduction25/12/25 11:00 PM
2

I don’t really tease that much I don’t think it’s essential. I will rip on them a little but that’s it. Just make sure it’s playful and not mean, can take some practice to calibrate if your not socially intelligent
/r/seduction25/12/25 05:19 PM
1

Idk sounds like he doesn't care if you have a good time, or maybe is unaware you're not having a good time? You either bring it up with him or stop going out with him. That or don't feel it's your responsibility to deal with the friend if you don't want to. Let him deal with it.
/r/seduction22/12/25 05:20 PM
3

cleanliness is number one. Then size, at least a queen, nobody will ever leave a king. Then after that I'd say a lot of pillows because most women I've known love pillows.
/r/seduction22/12/25 03:40 PM
5

Then they’re surprised when thinking of someone as a sex dispenser starts to create resentment
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/25 06:25 PM
46

When I was younger, an older guy told me you shouldn't compete with your friends, you should be hyping eachother up. That competitiveness can make for a weird vibe, plus you should want your friends to succeed if they're really your friends right? Like what's the goal? To beat your friend? It's kind of silly.
/r/seduction21/12/25 05:29 PM
1

True, and i also feel like one is much more likely to come into contact with a black bear than a grizzly.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/25 10:31 PM
2

I litterally came to this conclusion from camping once. Heard sounds in the distance and thought, that's either a bear or a person and in that moment I definitely preferred it to be a bear. This was in California. A black bear will run if you clap your hands. On the other hand if it was a person it was likely a tweaker therefore unpredictable.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/25 10:29 PM
0

Sure its unlikely to encounter a bear, ann even more unlikely to encounter a grizzly. Personally, I lived in NorCal so I encountered black bears a lot. Id' rather see one while Im camping then a random dude. TBF the question doesn't really establish any of these parameters
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/25 10:26 PM
2

The bear/man thing is stupid. I'm a man and I'd be more scared to encounter another man in the woods alone at night than a bear. Humans are the apex predator, they're cunning and could harm you just because they're crazy. A bear is likely not going to fuck with you unless it's starving or perceives you as a threat (to its child or its food). Also most bears are going to run away if you clap your hands. I will say though, that I will never approach a random woman in public. Like possibly, if it's…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/25 06:20 PM
–

I think its so rare for a guy to be irredeemably ugly. It usually can be summed up as he doesn't have any juice. There's nothing compelling about him. He's just another NPC. Ofc everybody feels unique and like they are an intelligent, nuanced, and interesting person, but instead of trying to present themselves better or be more, they just go with the easy scapegoat that they must be genetically inferior, nothing they can do about it. This reminds me of notes from the underground where the narrat…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/25 06:01 PM
1

Shoot your shot or don’t, she’ll never know you’re interested if you don’t make it known.
/r/seduction19/12/25 11:32 PM
2

There is such a thing as wanting it too bad. I was like you especiallyi n my early - mid twenties. I remember thinking "I can't wait till Im older and not so horny because I hate that this is all I think about". I'd be willing to bet that if dating is all you're focused on, you are overlooking and neglecting other areas of your life that need work. Even if you get blessed and bag a hottie, is she going to want to be with you long term when she realizes you have no ambitions in life other than be…
/r/seduction19/12/25 04:55 PM
1

Don’t live your life defined by marketing jargon man, please
/r/seduction18/12/25 07:53 PM
1

the male fantasy, two women and one man threesome isn't very easy to come by, there's a reason they refer to the third as a "unicorn". MMF probably a lot easier but obv that's less fantasized about. I'm sure it's a lot easier if you're bi
/r/seduction17/12/25 10:49 PM
1

its not even worth dealing with toxicity for just friends bro
/r/seduction17/12/25 10:45 PM
2

10 minutes into date: youre not gonna fuck me, this is over
/r/seduction17/12/25 04:10 AM
77

Easier with 20s because there’s simply more of them. I’m not interested in anyone too much younger or older than me though.im 35 and I’d ideally stay within five years or so of my age. Not for moral reasons really, just that ive found age gap relationships to be awkward in both directions
/r/seduction17/12/25 03:23 AM
3

35
/r/seduction16/12/25 02:40 PM
5

idk, when i entered the workforce i was kind of shocked at how many of my young coworkers were all hooking up with the guys in their 30s. Dont get me wrong, I thought it was weird at the time and some of those dudes def had issues but it happens
/r/seduction16/12/25 01:52 AM
54

I wouldn't say so. With age I've become much more focused on personal goals and growth. Sex isn't the prize as much as it used to be when I was younger. I feel that when I was younger I did a lot more chasing, but now, I feel like as long as I'm in a location with a good dating pool (rural bad, city good), I typically have women who are interested in me. It could also have to do with my attitude shift, I don't crave validation anymore, I think it makes women find me more intriguing. I actually f…
/r/seduction16/12/25 01:50 AM
69

she was in a mood and the mood passed, strange to experience but I have actually been on the other sided of the equation before and lost all interest in someone after sex even though I was hyped to begin with
/r/seduction15/12/25 11:52 PM
4

the point in my mind is that if you try to be a "good person" because you think it'll get you success with a woman then you're not a "good person" because if you actually were, you'd just be one because you actually have a strong belief in what's right not because you think youll be rewarded
/r/seduction15/12/25 07:51 PM
1

I would be honest with myself "Was that fun? Am I still actually interested?" if yes I would send her a message after the date like "that was fun, we should do it again sometime!" then I would gauge her interest based off the reply. If she responds with anything less than enthusiasm or confirming that she had a good time and wants to see me again, I'd likely move on.
/r/seduction15/12/25 04:35 AM
3

yes, at a certain point it's just bragging about sex addiction
/r/seduction13/12/25 03:44 PM
6

doubt. If we are generous and say he started having sex at 13, that still means he had sex with 29 different people every single year of his life. Does that make any sense?
/r/seduction13/12/25 03:28 PM
1

Idk man, I wouldn't be burning calories wondering to myself what a 23 year old girl is doing on her vacation. Your post implies that you're older than gen z, in that case, she's a young girl bro...That's like peak sloppy era for most people. I would never seriously date somebody at that age (I'm in my 30s). I would only hook up with them or strictly friends, and if I hooked up with them, I would assume they're seeing other people.
/r/seduction13/12/25 03:10 PM
15

Guys over play how important looks are. Sure, maybe the top 5% hot guys have it easy, but that's no where near approaching most men. I also want you to consider that if you have it that easy casual sex can lose its novelty and excitement. Focus on what you can control which is the confidence and self esteem issues you mentioned. Obviously it's easier said then done and everybody hates this advice, but it's a cliche for a reason: it works. I also want you to take sex off the pedestal. Having a bu…
/r/seduction12/12/25 05:32 PM
4

I'll argue against the majority of commentors and say that it's not that you're causing this behavior in women by being cold. Moreso, they are already interested in you, and that is why you are not interested in them. Let me rephrase. When a woman is actually into you, you realize you don't have to chase, so you don't. Women who aren't interested in you present a challenge. You feel a need to chase, because you know they will disappear if you don't. As much as men convince themselves they want e…
/r/seduction09/12/25 12:41 AM
1

one must imagine sisyphus happy
/r/seduction07/12/25 03:11 AM
47

For me it's been reconstructing how I view love and relationships which has come from my own hard-earned experiences. In my experience, the pedestalizing comes from excitement / eagerness. Let's be clear that you actually do not know that they are your type "inside and outside" especially if you just met them in a cold approach. Don't forget that we show our best selves in the beginning stages of getting to know someone, you don't actually know what they'd be like after a year of dating. The tru…
/r/seduction05/12/25 03:41 PM
2

Say what you're looking for from the get-go. Especially if you're on the apps, you can just put it in your bio. "I'm over clubbing, drinking, and crowds. Looking for someobody whose chill and prefers to stay in"
/r/seduction02/12/25 09:23 PM
–

It makes sense imo. Sex typically gets better the more you know your partner, what they like, dislike etc. in fact I got depressed after the last ONS I had because it just wasn’t that good and made me think about how much better it was with my long term ex
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/25 09:52 PM
6

i worked at a ghetto chipotle waay back in the day when I was still very socially oblivious, and I def had multiple chances with multiple girls there. While being the outsider of a certain culture can work against you, it just as easily can work for you as you're unique and different to them.
/r/seduction01/12/25 12:59 AM
12

Just be you man, even if your corny and white, if you own it, they might think its cute
/r/seduction01/12/25 12:39 AM
1

HUH!?
/r/seduction28/11/25 04:58 AM
6

Ok so forget about it and only consider the places i mentioned that are in the US, point still stands
/r/seduction27/11/25 02:50 AM
3

yeah but my home city is not in mexico, neither were the states I drove through. You'd be surprised, I've spent a lot of time in Mexico and I actually get a lot of women who offer to pay their way for the dates.
/r/seduction27/11/25 02:34 AM
2

Well that woman’s goal was to deceive and rally support online which she was succesful at. I don’t blame people for believing her, she was lying with the intent of being believed and now she’s going to be punished for it. I mean, youre not wrong. Women have solidarity for eachother in these circumstances, and this person took advantage of that. I grant you that this happens, but is it something that I’m afraid of happening to me? Not really, to me it seems as likely as being murdered. I don’t th…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 04:05 PM
2

Dude calm down I’m having a conversation with you, I asked out of curiosity because I couldn’t find what you were referring to.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 06:27 AM
1

Do you have a link to the support from woman’s spaces? All I see when I google it is that she’s facing multiple felonies
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 06:10 AM
6

Ok so you want to hold all women accountable for the actions of a few but the inverse of that is what’s pissing you off?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 02:57 AM
5

Ok..so your speaking of a specific instance where a man is polite and respectful and still suffers backlash and a Being smeared? I gotta say that doesn’t strike me as a social problem, that seems like something that happens here and there and sure that’s not cool, but I feel like this sub is acting like it’s an epidemic
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 02:54 AM
3

I’m not really convinced this is a wide spread social problem. I’m not saying it never happens, but I would say it’s an outlier event, not a common occurrence. Maybe more common among young people as immaturity plays more of a role.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 02:44 AM
9

Is this a realistic fear? I think this says more about how consuming rage bait short form content alters our perception of the real world
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 02:36 AM
7

“Seen/heard online”. I think rage bait content is to blame for this perception. I mean how often does this really happen? Seems blown out of proportion to me.I feel like ghosting is more common than getting blown out
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 02:34 AM
11

I mean, I would say that approaching respectfully and honoring the no is almost always ok. Am I wrong?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 02:19 AM
6

Why should men risk it being an issue at all? What do you expect? To not ever be rejected? Or are you saying that women don’t handle it gracefully when they’re not interested? Has this happened to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 02:13 AM
3

So what do you want to be the case in an ideal world then?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 02:09 AM
1

man likes achieving, not having had achieved - nietzsche
/r/seduction24/11/25 09:53 PM
9

You're being overly literal which is making me think this is an autism issue. I get that its frustrating that life isn't black and white with clear cut rules, but get used to it man
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 09:29 PM
6

the mall was just an example, we're talking about appraoching women, not malls. I think you are just venting frustration, you don't seem to have a cohesive argument to make
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 09:22 PM
8

I def walk down the sidewalk in cities thinking "nobody better try to talk to me or try to sell me shit" lol. I don't really get what your point is. You feel that women are hypocrites because some want to be approached and others not? Or it's too confusing a line to navigate? I sincerely don't know what you're arguing at this point.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 09:10 PM
14

Ok but what if a person approaches you in the mall about buying a watch? Half of people will say "its just their job" and carry on, and other will be annoyed, some might even tell the guy to fuck off. You are ultimately asking for that persons time and attention, and they truly do not owe that to a stranger. There's also a dickish, entitled way to do it vs a chill/polite way of doing it. If you aren't pushy, use your manners, and take no as a no, I don't think the majority of women you approach …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 09:06 PM
47

well its not like the council of all womankind released a PR statement addressing their universal consensus about how they like to be approached. You're talking about half the population, of course you're not going to get the same answer from everyone. I do wish women felt more emboldened to approach us, and I will say that I personally don't approach women I don't know with romantic intentions. I moreso meet women through other women I'm friends with or via dating apps. Personally, I feel fine …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 08:52 PM
5

I mean, in an ideal world we would all be straight forward about everything, but that doesn't always happen. Sometimes you think you're on the same page, but you're not. Ive had people catch feelings for me when I was on a short trip to their city, like I thought it was self evident that it would be casual? Nevertheless, the heart wants what it wants. When it comes to the apps, I try to state my intentions in my bio because I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, nor do I want somebody to fall i…
/r/seduction24/11/25 08:25 PM
3

It’s only as much of a hurdle as you make it out to be in your mind. Just be upfront about your situation. I had a hot gf while I was broke and living with my mom in my thirties lol. Not everyone cares about money, especially artists.
/r/seduction23/11/25 06:15 PM
18

you have to escalate. I usually start with innocuous touching, like the shoulder, top of the back. Gauge their reaction. Are they smiling? Do they seem to like it? Do they reciprocate? Then you can escalate further, small of the back, the hand, the hair etc, at that point it's just inertia, and you kiss and all the other fun stuff. Aside from that, you can always sneak in some compliments when you're hanging out. They can be subtle "wow you look great, did you cut your hair? I love the outfit" e…
/r/seduction22/11/25 02:56 AM
3

have you ever talked about these issues? Sounds like maybe it's already done for, but if you're contemplating divorce, I suppose it wouldn't hurt?
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/25 12:10 AM
22

idk man, im in my thirties and i dont really talk about sex and hookups much with married/monog friends. They just don't really get it, and I don't see what they could add to a convo besides a "nice". TBH I think I have better convos about dating and sex with women. A lot of guys are not comfortable with discussing sexuality imo unless its just a bro comment like "yeah shes hot"
/r/seduction19/11/25 09:15 PM
4

Bro, isn't it a negative thing for YOU? Forget morality even, you're just playing with fire. If you're unhappy with your wife address it and figure out how to move on. Doing it this way is just going to blow everything up when it comes to light, either that or you LIVE A LIE. How is either one of those outcomes appealing to you? People will surely have affairs, they always have and likely always will. I don't see how it could possibly be healthy for any of the parties though.
/r/seduction18/11/25 08:31 PM
6

you sound scary dude.
/r/seduction18/11/25 05:44 AM
5

I am seeing three people rn. I'm older, mid thirties. I went through the pea-cocking and dancing monkey phases of my twenties, my perspective has changed significantly. I have found that people have "types". I am slightly nerdy, big (both tall and a little chubby), and have reddish hair. I am unlikely ever going to get anywhere with someone whose type is thin, athletic, and with dark features. The point: Most women (people really) feel attraction immediately or not at all, I find there is little…
/r/seduction05/11/25 06:34 PM
2

I had a similiar fantasy, matched with an older woman on bumble. Went out with her, made out. She invited me over at a later date to presumably have sex and I lost interest. Fantasies are stronger as fantasies sometimes.
/r/seduction28/10/25 02:13 AM
1

Honestly I don’t waste time with people who are iffy on me. There’ll always be people who are genuinely interested in you without having to convince them.just gotta find them
/r/seduction26/10/25 03:55 PM
5

You should hope so. Otherwise they're having sex as a means of self harm
/r/seduction22/10/25 05:51 PM
4

If they do that they're not interested, doesn't matter what you say or do, minds well just forget them and move on
/r/seduction03/10/25 11:12 PM
2

If she’s not reciprocating your energy. It can be hard to gauge at times, but (in my experience) the times women have liked me, they didn’t string me a long and play hard to get. If you get the feeling you’d completely lose contact if you stopped reaching out first, she probably isn’t that into you
/r/seduction26/09/25 03:36 AM
10

One key thing about it is that they have time. They're available. A lot of those guys who are grinding away and working don't have as much time or aren't available. At least thats what Bukowski said of himself.
/r/seduction25/09/25 09:42 PM
2

I'm 34 and I wouldn't go too much younger than 29. Sure i find younger people physically attractive, but they're so awkward and unconfident in themselves (i was too when I was younger). I think older women are super hot but they usually aren't interested in me.
/r/seduction07/09/25 07:42 PM
11

theres no magic number of girls you can sleep with that will make you feel better. It can be fun, but it can also be exhausting and demoralizing. Most guys don't get laid that much, you probably got laid a lot more than your friends when you had a gf.
/r/seduction03/09/25 10:30 PM
1

i think it works mostly with warm leads ie girls you already know and have some level of rapport with. You can slide into a strangers DMs but I think success will be much harder. This is by no means a step by step formula, just what I've done. Send memes. That is a very easy way to start building a connection and maintain a connection with minimal effort. Ask what they've been up to, you've been thinking about them, if it's been a while since you talked. When you get some back and forth going an…
/r/seduction13/08/25 10:50 PM
12

Life is a series of losing and regaining your mojo. Try to reconnect with yourself, what you value, what you want out of life, etc, itll come back
/r/seduction13/08/25 10:30 PM
12

I used to be incel-adjacent when I lived in a small town, there were hardly any women my age, and the ones that were around I either wasn't interested in, or they were already in relationships. Then I started moving around and living in cities and it was no longer a problem
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 03:18 PM
–

This is insanely true. I'm in Lake Tahoe, CA rn purely because I have a good paying job here but the dating is absolute ass. Mostly because i don't fit the culture here: not outdoorsy, don't do winter sports, not super fit etc. However, anytime I go back home to the city of Chicago, I do very well for myself, matching with women that seem out of my league to me. I do fit in with the culture a lot more there though
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 03:16 PM
29

in the heat of the moment when it was going that way anyway. Saying it as a cold approach or before we've touched? Nah
/r/seduction11/08/25 10:43 PM
1

Most of the time saying it is just a formality. If you're already making out and feeling on eachother it only makes sense to go somewhere private. "Wanna go back to my place?" simple as that.
/r/seduction11/08/25 08:59 PM
3

If you feel you are "chasing" than she's not that into you IMO, or at the very least just kind of toying with you until something better comes along. I would call seduction a "dance" more than a "chase" as chase sounds one sided and dance implies two willing participants. It's normal for some push and pull, but you shouldn't feel like Wile E Cyote trying to catch the Road Runner. In my experience, when I've found people I truly click with, it doesn't feel like I'm chasing them and trying to wear…
/r/seduction11/08/25 02:54 PM
1

Being confident and up front about what you want so that you scare away the right people. Getting your own life in order so that you are set up for something long term (assuming you're talking about family and kids). Volunteer or get involved in something that you're passionate about that has a community so you can meet somebody who has shared morals, interests etc. Strike a balance between having real, fair standards, but not delusional ones like she has to be a 10 and make six figures and want…
/r/seduction11/08/25 02:48 PM
1

This, I am a man and I don't like nice guys either because of what Zotoaster is saying, they seem fake. Only ever smiling and expressing positive thoughts and notions, it's annoying. Like, come on, nobody is that positive all the time, be real.
/r/seduction11/08/25 02:17 PM
1

Speaking for myself, I think I conflated moral goodness with deservingness. When I wasn't having success in relationships my thought was "Why? I don't deserve this, I'm a good person". The thing is, being nice or good has nothing to do with seduction, sexuality, romance etc. They are completely different things, you can be the male incarnation of mother theresa, but if you stay in your room 24/7 and are scared to talk to women...well, what do you expect to happen?
/r/seduction11/08/25 02:15 PM
315

idk man, it took me a long time to detangle the shame around expressing my sexuality. I could never shake the feeling that I was being disrespectful or making somebody uncomfortable by simply showing interest. At some point I started to realize I was missing chance after chance because I was too crippled by those thoughts.
/r/seduction10/08/25 10:16 PM
2

seriously, what good does it do you to attract people if they're not someone you'd actually connect with and esp if they're liking a masked version of you
/r/seduction08/08/25 12:51 AM
0

how have you lived your whole life and never heard somebody use the word "disarm" that way?
/r/seduction05/08/25 08:53 PM
2

thats a term that people have been using since before video games dog lol
/r/seduction05/08/25 04:36 PM
8

You could try to disarm the friend by maintaining a playful frame and bringing her into the conversation. I know that's not a fool proof tactic but that's what I would do
/r/seduction05/08/25 12:58 AM
5

Im assuming he must know these people irl to some degree? I would be amazed if these were all cold Instagram approaches, not unheard of but to keep doing repeatedly would be something. Instgram is good (imo) for slow game, theyre basically warm leads. People who already know something about you, flirting is as simple as liking their stories and since theres already some rapport, you don't have to have a whole dragged out back and forth. Even though you say hes nothing special, a doctor is one of…
/r/seduction04/08/25 06:07 PM
39

the issue most have is that they are people-pleasers, ie just agreeing with everything she says, saying what you think she wants to hear etc. The other common issue is just being boring. Not making engaging conversation, not being a good story teller, or having anything interesting going on in your life outside of work/school ie lacking hobbies or passions. I was on a date just yesterday and while she was cute, I litterally lost attraction for her because she was just so dull. No interesting sto…
/r/seduction28/07/25 05:51 PM
1

Shes getting frustrated because you're (intentionally or not) leading her on. Flirting heavily but not giving her the satisfaction of kissing.
/r/seduction27/07/25 09:49 PM
1

maybe you're picking the wrong environment? I don't really like clubs these days myself (in my mid thirties, can't hear anyone, younger crowd anyway). You could try social circle gaming.
/r/seduction27/07/25 09:24 PM
1

i think its toxic to think of yourself as "winning" a conversation, thats childish dude lol
/r/seduction24/07/25 11:46 PM
2

if its your wifes idea it COULD happen. If its your idea, good luck
/r/seduction21/07/25 01:03 AM
6

I am a low key chill person, so if I do approach 1, I can't maintain that energy over time because its not me. So I do 2 because that's just more true to how I am
/r/seduction20/07/25 10:45 PM
1

I usually say "What do you prefer? instagram? texting?" they'll tell you
/r/seduction13/07/25 05:11 AM
1

If she's willingly messaging you assume she's interested. Most people don't want to be pen pals or get to know you over text, that is better left for in person. When I'm on apps my goal is to get off the app asap and then make a plan to meet (something easy, flexible, low pressure) for first date.
/r/seduction10/07/25 04:40 AM
22

I would say because it kills the tension / intrigue. Somebody whose an open book and lays their cards down right away is like skipping foreplay
/r/seduction08/07/25 11:53 PM
35

imo its a dance. Tension is the play between "will we?" and "won't we?" Putting your cards on the table immediately is the antithesis of tension, that's why teasing is a common way to flirt, you're acting like you don't want them, but you do, and that is tension. I say dance because I think it's more of an art than a science. You can play it too cool, to where they just think you're not interested at all. For me, I balance bold actions like asking them out, showing interest, touching etc, with m…
/r/seduction08/07/25 08:25 PM
43

Idt thats how the human brain works where people neatly fall into one of two categories. There have been great men in history who were willingly celibate, would you say Nikola Tesla or Sir Isaac Newton weren't "superior" men? Some women won't have sex until they are married, what then? Some men want to marry and don't want to sleep around, many of the guys I know like that seem like they're doing just fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 08:18 PM
1

because its awkward to say no, also you dont know if a guy is going to get angry about it
/r/seduction08/07/25 05:29 AM
1

Most issues and unattractive qualities that men and women exhibit boil down to insecurity
/r/seduction01/07/25 03:52 PM
2

Test the waters with small things like hand on the shoulder, top of the back. Compliment her hair, make up, say she looks cute today etc. Those are all things that ride the line between friendly and flirty. Based on those small, lower risk, actions you can gauge her reaction. If she pulls away or looks confused / mildly uncomfortable then don’t proceed. If she is smiling and giving indication that she likes it, escalate a little further, gauge reaction etc.
/r/seduction01/07/25 03:50 PM
2

misery loves company
/r/seduction28/06/25 04:05 AM
3

If a woman likes you, don't question it lol. That just leads to insecurity and losing her. The social status thing is kinda stupid. I've had times where women who I thought I was out of their league didn't want me, and i've also had women who are out of my league want me. Don't think about it too hard, people are attracted to who theyre attracted to
/r/seduction24/06/25 04:44 PM
10

COuld be that the friend spoke up about it and now the one you like doesn't want to make her friend jealous. Happens all the time
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/25 11:16 PM
93

I feel like bese subs are always trying to crack some kind of code that doesn’t exist lol
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 11:00 PM
3

Control is an illusion my man
/r/seduction01/06/25 12:24 PM
1

Social circle. I am pretty outgoing and just try to keep myself meeting new people, even platonically. I feel like the types of women who are interested in me eventually make themselves known or available. Getting vouched for by other women is huge.
/r/seduction23/05/25 04:28 PM
2

We're all sexual beings, none of us would be here without sex, it is normal to want sex, therefore you shouldn't feel shame towards your natural desires. There's nothing inherently wrong with approaching a woman you're attracted to... That being said, there's a fine line between respectfully shooting your shot and being creepy or down bad as you say. My advice is to be respectful but bold. Shoot your shot, and if she declines, accept it. Don't try to change her mind, lash out her, beg for a chan…
/r/seduction20/05/25 04:49 PM
11

sounds like you had a specific situation happen to you and you're salty
/r/seduction20/05/25 04:39 PM
1

double team bro
/r/seduction04/05/25 10:36 PM
-6

It’s not a date at that point
/r/seduction04/05/25 03:50 PM
-5

I don’t really care about seeming like a tough guy, comes off insecure after a certain age
/r/seduction04/05/25 03:06 PM
0

Thatdounds like a friendly vibe more than a date. If that were me, it would depend on the situation , but I’d do one of two things. One, straight up tell her “tbh i don’t really want to hang with dude” and see what she says then maybe you can both blow him off. Or the second option where I let dude tag along and be cool about it but after I tell her “next time I want to take you to dinner” or fill in the blank. It’s not necessarily a bad thing if another guy comes, she could still be feeling you…
/r/seduction04/05/25 02:56 PM
4

Not just confidence but contentedness. Nobody wants to come into a miserable persons life and become their reason to live
/r/seduction26/04/25 12:45 AM
3

Men over-logic dating and romance, women (generally) don't think of dating the way our autistic asses do. They go more off vibes and subjectivity. Most times kissing for me begins with touching/hugging/caressing.
/r/seduction13/04/25 01:38 AM
0

Im glad you at least got my point that I like to jack off and punch holes in the a wall at the same time
/r/seduction04/04/25 09:12 PM
1

I would text and say I had fun so she knows I don’t feel weird about it and also for me to guste how she felt about it. Time frame for making a new plan is whenever your both free and it feels right
/r/seduction04/04/25 12:26 AM
3

Good guide to freak people out
/r/seduction01/04/25 06:26 PM
2

This is your sign to put the phone down and talk to people
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/25 05:44 PM
2

If you’re really into her and it’s mutual who cares?
/r/seduction29/03/25 03:20 PM
1

You guys take the wrong approach to dating and romance. She obv sees something interesting / attractive in you, the advice will always be the same, have fun and don’t be too platonic, escalate properly, don’t over think jt
/r/seduction29/03/25 03:16 PM
14

I have two guesses: You turned her off with nervousness and kissing too much, being too tender when she just wanted to fuck. Once she was turned off she didn’t want to fuck and just tried to figure out how to get you to leave. She had already been drinking and told you to come over when she was horny but then lost her nerve or perhaps drank too much and got in her head about it. Either way lost her nerve. Saying that you were obviously irritated and that you checked the bathroom to make sure she…
/r/seduction29/03/25 03:10 PM
1

Whatever’s authentic. If you’re quiet because you feel like it and later you’re loud because it feels good, that’s authentic. If you do either one because you’re trying to be mysterious or think you have to be loud, that’s not
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 12:54 PM
1

Without footage of you or seeing how you interact with people it's impossible to say what you're doing wrong just based off your post. Despite what people in this sub will say, you can def have success in dating while fat, I know because I have. You say you're extroverted, maybe you have too much energy? Maybe you're a little overwhelming to new people who aren't as extroverted as you? All I can really do is guess tbh
/r/seduction27/03/25 12:16 AM
2

Be yourself is bad advice if you’re a hard case newbie, but once you learn how to socialize and flirt it becomes good advice again
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 12:49 AM
2

Confidence is a word with many definitions depending who you ask. I think a better word sometimes is self secure. You don’t have to be cocky or even a big presence, but if you are insecure with low self esteem, it will never end well
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 12:46 AM
2

well hate to break it to you but your daughters are probably going to have a sex life at some point. Sex is part of life, you probably just have some kind of deep-seated shame towards showing attraction to somebody else. It's better to put your intentions out there, if they reject you or say no, just take the L and keep it moving. You got this.
/r/seduction25/03/25 10:58 PM
42

Are you sure you’re not being paranoid, what do you mean look at you like you’re creepy? You can’t read their minds, they probably just hate their jobs
/r/seduction20/03/25 05:38 PM
1

Personally I find it chiller and more effective to focus on being a social person. Youll inevitably meet women and it's not as on the spot as cold appraoch.
/r/seduction16/03/25 01:07 AM
2

Ah, that's a tiny bit different. I didn't realize you were at a distance. Still though, being in touch throughout the day every day is a lot for most people, let alone someone with a kid. Maybe start leaving your phone in the other room? Start reading, or playing a sport, or even video games, something to take your mind off it.
/r/seduction16/03/25 01:03 AM
-1

Are you mainly using online dating? I'm not 100% against it, but if it's your only way of talking to women it tends to tank self esteem as it is so overly saturated with men and not many women. Plus they want to incentivize you to buy premium accounts and boosts etc. If that's not the case then stop trying so hard. When you put in a lot of effort it 1. burns you out after a while and 2. It's kind of obvious how hard you're trying to women and it's not exactly attractive. When you go to a store, …
/r/seduction15/03/25 11:42 PM
13

Number one, do NOT make it her problem. I see you put 'need' in quotations, which tells me you know that it's not truly a need. Point blank, you are acting insecure and needy. Maybe you should start journaling. Sometimes, I vent on voice memos when I don't want to subject friends and family to my insecure ranting. Maybe start googling and read articles/watching videos about neediness, insecurity, and separation anxiety. If you tell her anything just tell her you're going to work on it and ask th…
/r/seduction15/03/25 11:37 PM
6

We always want what we can't have, you can't actually tie those ones down and that's what makes them more alluring.
/r/seduction15/03/25 09:51 PM
13

Nice and caring or needy and insecure?
/r/seduction15/03/25 07:16 AM
5

I think more subtle than "show me" is "what are you doing?", get her going a bit, then you can say "show me". I always try to drag things out and let the tension linger
/r/seduction14/03/25 07:38 PM
2

Nothing but problems down that path
/r/seduction11/03/25 06:09 PM
9

Obviously there are good women, but I’d say don’t get married again
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/25 07:29 AM
1

Feelings change esp if drinking is involved when you first meet. But also could just be you turned her off and she didn’t want to explain it so she ghosted. Could be a million things, not worth losing sleep over
/r/seduction10/03/25 07:07 AM
46

You were trying too hard and we’re over invested, now that you’ve chilled out and frame it as being friends, you’ve just made yourself seem chiller and less like someone who is going to get obsessed
/r/seduction25/02/25 09:51 PM
1

The OP said they didn’t write the post
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/25 05:41 PM
–

Language barriers can be a huge issue, I had one relationship that was starting to get serious but the language made it really hard when it came time to communicate about touchy subjects. I'm dating somebody of my own culture now. It's pretty nice, I miss somethings about latin/hispanic culture but they're minor in the big scope of things. It sounds like maybe you feel insecure of your boyfriend having experience with other women and you're afraid you won't stack up? If that's the case, that's m…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/25 05:01 PM
7

I hired a sex worker only once in my life during a sort of personal crisis. I was torn up about a bad break up and thought I just needed to have sex to get over it. Didn’t help, she looked nothing like the picture and smelled like an old woman. It was awkward and sad and too expensive. I very much regretted it in the inmediate after math. This happened nearly a decade ago at this point, i don’t really see it as a regret at this point in my life but more so an experience that I learned from and d…
/r/seduction21/02/25 05:38 PM
–

Idt that’s the case at all, idt women care or just see them as sex tourists
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 12:22 AM
6

My bwain wuwks on cowd hawd wogic
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/25 12:20 AM
1

By their logic I should be a virgin because I can barely provide for myself
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 07:35 PM
3

I think there are different interpretations of what it means to be one’s self. Some take that quite literally to mean don’t change anything including don’t grow or improve. I don’t think anyone rational would seriously suggest that. I think it’s important to challenge yourself to grow, you should put yourself in challenging situations and get out of your comfort zone. That doesn’t mean you have to renounce DND or whatever other traits one could potentially see as unattractive. I tried to fit the…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 02:59 PM
3

This might seem semantic but this is how I see it: You should change things like prejudices and confidence level, you should challenge yourself to grow etc. I interpret “be yourself” as be authentic, you don’t have to put on airs, ie if you like anime or something other people might see as cringe or what have you, just own it, rather than shame yourself for who you are. That’s not to say if you watch anime all day and ignore hygiene and responsibilities, no that’s a problem that needs to be chan…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 02:54 PM
0

I think your going to get nitpicked on your wording but I agree with your main idea. Why do I give half a fuck if a woman chooses to chase a felon? That’s sad if anything and also has nothing to do with me. I don’t waste time in general pursuing someone who isn’t interested in me.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 02:48 PM
1

Thanks daddy
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/25 06:44 PM
2

Jesus dude, you got the pedantic autism
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 10:32 PM
1

Lmao why don’t you offer you’re own argument then instead of deflecting with meaningless jargon?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 08:41 PM
0

You realize people don't follow the scientific method in dialectical debate right? You're nitpicking a small detail and ignoring the central argument.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 05:22 PM
5

Point still stands, the men get mad that they can't get with "easy" women and don't want to admit that their personalities are a problem, hence the easier pill to swallow: "women only have sex with hot assholes"
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 05:06 PM
2

So let me go tell that to a creepy guy who can't get laid and he's going to read off some manifesto about how women have too many options and they will still go for a hot guy because those are the only guys that get laid.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 05:00 PM
4

Literally answered your question?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 08:52 PM
22

Was going to say...I worked with a woman who was obese and her husband was a bike tour guide, like his whole life was riding bikes and being fit.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 08:33 PM
1

They just don’t think they could ever be seen as one
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 03:34 PM
1

The thing is these "creepy" guys tend to lack self awareness and can't understand how their actions are seen as creepy so they figure it must be something else, and how convenient if it's something they can't control like being ugly.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 03:24 PM
4

If you're going to cold approach you should expect rejection. You're a stranger, if that woman lives in a city she's used to having strange men try to talk to her. She's probably on her way to work, why does she have to coddle a man that's doing something with such a high chance of rejection? Don't do it if you can't handle it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/25 07:08 PM
3

I'm sure there were other things, I doubt it was a one issue decision. From my own experience, it can be pretty frustrating when your partner is bad with money or doesn't care about it as much as you do. When you're trying to build a life with someone, finances are pretty important
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 06:26 PM
1

3 people all said "you're creepy"? Idk man i wasn't there, why do you think?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 03:04 PM
1

how do you know they thought you were creepy and not just annoying or weird?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 02:59 PM
1

I’ll take being liked by women over whatever you got going on there
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 07:26 PM
1

Unless you’re talking about the most superficial women possible I don’t agree with you, I think you just sound like someone whose been online too long
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 07:15 PM
1

I have traveled extensively, worked as a bartender in a major city, I have met tons of people. I also was a nerdy 4chan incel back in the day, its not hard to read desperation and resentment on a person, let alone an angry nerd with no social skills
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:13 PM
3

But "creepy" is the word in question. You think somebody who is fun loving and charming will be seen as creepy simply by virtue of being fat and ugly? I think it's overly simplistic
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:09 PM
3

Jack Black is creepy?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:03 PM
1

Someone who spends all their time on Reddit angry at women and decrying their curse of ugliness is not going to come across well adjusted irl 9 out of 10 times
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 05:28 PM
1

Bro dropped a Unabomber manifesto on hating women and wonders why he can’t get a date
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 04:13 AM
1

Probably because it comes off even stronger through an app
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 04:10 AM
0

Your confusing rejection for creepiness
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 02:28 AM
1

Yeah I don’t buy the fat = creepy because when you picture a “creepy” character in a movie how often are you gonna picture a fat guy?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 02:27 AM
3

So you think none of that would come through in person?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 02:26 AM
3

So what’s that make a friend zoned guy? Unattractive yet obviously deemed safe
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 02:24 AM
3

Agree to disagree, I think the ick and creepiness are different things. I also think a guy having no game and even being corny isn't creepy even if it's unattractive or gives them the ick. Creepy to me is like this guy might follow me home, or get obsessed with me, or some how cause problems
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 09:50 PM
0

When somebody seems to be looking through you rather than at you, that they want something badly that you can't give them, that they are a shoe string snap away from losing their sanity.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 09:38 PM
7

Frat guy who isn't ugly but is always pushing boundaries and is date-rapey. You wouldn't consider that creepy?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 09:29 PM
7

He wasn't ugly though...he's obsessive to the point its concerning, that isn't cute on anyone
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 09:28 PM
8

Yeah but then theres the fitcells and people who get buff and looksmax but are still angry psychopaths who scare women away.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 09:16 PM
9

"If the angry, obsessive, off-putting guy was actually well-adjusted, approachable, and chill, you'd like him" wow I never considered that
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 09:14 PM
-1

Most of these would just make a guy look awkward, not necessarily creepy
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 09:11 PM
1

Yet you compare the need for sex with the need for blood as if denying someone blood is on the same level of denying someone sex. In a vacuum I agree that saying sex is a need doesn't mean someone is required to provide it, but you chose a really ill-fitting comparison.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 10:38 PM
1

Need? You won't die without sex, there have been great male scientists and writers who were celibate for the sake of their work. It's a desire, an appetite, it might feel unfulfilling and it surely is a form of suffering to have unmet desires, but a need? Nah. Your argument could be viewed charitably in a vacuum, but lets not overlook the subtext of those kind of posts which often imply that women are too picky, stuck up, don't like "nice guys" etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 06:39 PM
19

Ever consider a hobby or a sport?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/24 01:19 PM
2

its called desperation
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 05:21 PM
3

That faithful day when they have to choose between Walmart or sex work? I think you're thinking of all sex workers as a monolith. There are plenty who have a day job or do other things for money as well. I mean, I'm a writer. I can show that the book industry makes x ammount of millions and that the top earners are all rich. That doesn't mean your average writer is making easy money.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/24 04:24 PM
3

Its not the "easy money" people think it is. It's still a lot of work, cultivating an online persona, managing a business, not to mention the risks it comes with. A lot of sex workers are poor, if not most.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/24 08:24 PM
1

If it’s not satire I guess it’s making fun of you too
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/24 05:33 PM
1

Easy and possible are different things
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/24 10:44 PM
1

You think getting a house,bmw, and a phd is easy?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/24 07:23 PM
2

This comment litterally reads as satire lmao
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/24 03:30 PM
1

Apps are businesses, businesses need money. Who's the target audience of apps? Single men. What makes single men pay for an app? The perception that they need it. What makes a man stop paying for an app? Finding a spouse. You see where these incentives lie right? Uncritically accepting dating apps as a representation of reality is the same as taking social media posts as a reflection of reality. There's a lot of distortion and incentives that skew things behind the scenes
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/24 04:20 PM
27

"Giving up" is a beautiful thing to embrace. A lot of time we don't realize how much pressure we put on ourselves. There's this phantom that lives in our heads of society, or our parents, or peers who are constantly on our asses about not living up to expectations, but nobody does it to us more than ourselves. You should give up. Give up the idea of the mold you're trying to fit into. Give up your idea of success. See who you actually are underneath it all. You may find that your desires are not…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/24 04:16 PM
26

I identified with MGTOW once upon a time and the thing that annoyed me was that it still centered a bitterness toward women instead of just shrugging off societal expectations and doing what you want with your life.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/24 04:06 PM
0

Sorry poor lil bb I'm kissing you on the forehead rn
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 03:49 PM
7

It does get pretty tiring: the endless complaining. I don’t do any group hobbies, I still make friends just fine. If you don’t have social skills you’ll struggle in most any environment. Just work towards self improvement and don’t get self destructive with negative self talk.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 08:44 PM
3

The whole premise of your question is telling: that people are objectively better than you. Sure Michael Jordan is better than me at basketball, and Jeff Bezos is better than me at making money, but we’re all human at the end of the day. Nobody is “better” than anybody else.
/r/ExRedPill06/09/24 08:28 PM
1

What is bta?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/24 07:46 PM
1

Dude I’m sorry but if you sincerely believe anyone is saying that then I have a bridge to sell you
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 07:59 PM
11

I feel like a lot of this resentment comes from people not doing what they truly want to in life. If you want to live a safe and secure life then do it. If you don't want to and are only doing it because you think of it as a mating strategy, well you set yourself up for failure and that's also insane logic lol
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 01:11 PM
4

I'd say don't fight him to adamantly otherwise he'll categorize you as a delusional sjw or something like that. What I do in these situations is ask genuine questions with a sincere tone that may poke holes in the belief system or bread crumb them to their own conclusions. "Oh interesting, so do you think your mom chose your dad because he was alpha?" "What does it mean to be alpha?" Etc
/r/ExRedPill03/09/24 11:06 PM
3

Uh well the OP basically states the opposite: that women are praised for sexual liberation.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 01:41 PM
43

We can just as easily say the opposite though. If a guy gets laid he's going to get high-fives from everybody, but if a woman goes home with someone at the bar, everybody's going to whisper that she's a slut
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 03:10 PM
0

I would say for many men (thinking of personal friends of mine) that it’s a perceived scarcity and furthermore a reflection of a deep seeded insecurity. One friend in particular has a good job, is nice, traditionally attractive and girls have always liked him. But his ass, for god knows what reason, was hung up on his first love (since 7th grade) who had very clear signs of massive mental health issues. He married her anyway and went through the wringer in some delusional quest thinking he could…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 01:20 PM
31

It’s a self fullfilling prophecy at the end of the day. It’s funny that it’s cloaked in being strong and tough and manly but it kinda just boils down to being a coping mechanism for being hurt emotionally or a fear thereof
/r/ExRedPill02/09/24 01:09 PM
–

Women hardly even use the apps compared to men.. I think that’s where this whole idea of the mythical top 5% man idea comes from.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 03:28 AM
19

Is this just you airing out a bad experience? You can't be mad if an indirect action gets an indirect response. I just put my cards on my the table personally, I think it's better to be direct and clear the air before you start getting in your own head with stuff like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 04:04 PM
1

You can feel free to dm me yours if you want, I haven’t used it in a while and don’t have one atm
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 01:32 PM
6

Having realistic expectations ie not getting frustrated when I’m not successful right away. Leaning into being polarizing ie boldly being yourself in a way that scares off the wrong people and attracts the right ones. Having a variety of photos, not any corny ones like shirtless gym selfie or posing with a fish. IMO your profile does 90% of the work, chatting is just confirming interest before planning to meet. Some other logistical things though: I definitely have more success in cities and you…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 03:01 AM
19

This is you trying to rationalize from the POV of your insecurities. I know because you're young and I've also been there. Unless you're standards are completely out of whack (wanting to date supermodels when you're shut-in neck beard), the answer would just be to work on your self esteem. This can look like outward things: working out, getting a better haircut, getting stylish frames (if you wear glasses), working on posture, body language, charisma etc. It can also be inner things like: Journa…
/r/ExRedPill31/08/24 03:39 PM
25

There are far more men on the apps in general which skews things. I've had plenty of success on the apps throughout the years and if I posted a picture of myself here or described my life, nobody in their right mind would label me as a top 5% male. A lot of this is just cope
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/24 03:35 PM
1

“there are worse things than being alone but it often takes decades to realize this, and most often when you do it's too late and there's nothing worse than too late.” - Charles Bukowski
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/24 10:29 PM
7

Being a little too vague here, what do you mean harmful behaviors?
/r/ExRedPill23/08/24 04:37 PM
0

"Unless you're irresistibly attractive, merely talking to women "as people" will likely end with them turning you into one of the girlfriends." - oh right out the gate with the bitterness I see lol. Guys act like being friends with a woman is humiliating lol. I'm in my thirties, in all my experience it boils down to women are either attracted to you or they aren't. Sometimes it can grow on them, but you can't really fake attraction and clicking with someone. It either happens or it doesn't. I've…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/24 03:25 PM
3

I can get behind ideas like we as men have been misled on romantic relationships, and that putting women (or anyone) on pedestals is unhealthy. I can get into MGTOW ideas that men (or anyone else) should feel beholden to societal expectations. Where it all turns sour for me is when women become scapegoats and responsible for men's suffering. That's some whiny baby bullshit to me
/r/ExRedPill21/08/24 08:34 PM
11

Definitely true. I've had a lot of FWB situations that fluctuate between strictly friends and something more. There's a lot more nuance than people realize because they're too busy trying to simplify everything into a narrative that eliminates them as having anything to work on.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/24 02:18 PM
11

I think its comforting to think desperation is only out of horniness but I think on a psychological level it goes deeper than that. Men are lonely, scared, sad, directionless, they're desperate for more than sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/24 05:43 PM
69

Men won't have sex with anything, you're thinking of desperation not horniness. I would rather masturbate than have sex with someone I'm not attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/24 04:54 PM
14

Rarely in life can you ever place blame 100% on one factor or quality. If you don't like a movie there's usually multiple reasons you could give. Sure, attraction is necessary to get your foot in the door but that does not mean you have to be above average by any means. A lot of these men you speak of could do simple things like get a better haircut, wear clothes that fit, wear more stylish frames etc, yet they see it as a genetic issue. That they could never in a million years be attractive to …
/r/ExRedPill04/08/24 02:51 PM
2

That statistic comes from an okcupid survey that was taken quite a while ago. You also have to remember that specifically within the realm of online dating, there is significantly much more men on the apps. They are out for money and they basically force you to pay for the app for your profile to even be shown to people. This skews peoples perceptions. You should never RELY on OLD, it will do damage to your confidence and self esteem and you'll be even more desperate than you were when you start…
/r/seduction29/07/24 09:50 PM
6

Other men simping isn't the reason you don't have a girlfriend. Also...there's more to life then male attention, that isn't the sole force molding and sculpting a woman's behavior. Think about what you're saying, you think women only have hobbies and interests in so far as it may attract a man? You must not know many women if you think male attention is some grand reward.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/24 04:23 PM
5

Spoiler: you will see no difference in your experience on the apps
/r/ExRedPill23/07/24 07:02 PM
1

I never know where these comments are coming from because you can totally kill it dating as busser at a restaurant if you got game
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/24 01:25 AM
1

If you befriend someone because you want something from them, you're not really friends with them... Friends first has worked for me plenty of times, but it's not like it was some long con strategy I was consciously implementing. It was more like, we were legitimately friends or friendly acquaintances, then later in life, dynamics changed, life shifted things around, and things just lined up.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/24 06:25 AM
1

that's laughable dude I have like 4k in savings rn
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 05:41 PM
5

There's a difference between treating someone like they're a predator versus being cautious and not opening up / trusting someone right away.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 04:33 PM
8

You are jaded as hell man lol. If you lead with your money then expect to attract people who want it. I have never taken a date to an expensive restaurant, half the time I just go to a dive bar or hang out somewhere free like a beach or a park. You gotta get out of your own head man
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 07:46 AM
2

The problem I see with a lot of topics in subs like these is you're all trying to make a hard science out of something thats much more subjective than that
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 07:23 AM
1

Idk man, I was an incel before there was even a word for it. I kept putting myself out there and I eventually found success. It's not easy and takes consistency, most don't have that kind of patience and settle for the first person to show any interest in them.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 07:06 AM
3

How is attraction a transaction? If I see a girl at the mall and think she's hot, what has been transacted? On love being a transaction as well, how does that work say if you grieve someone who is dead? What can you benefit from loving a dead person? I think you're trying to use a flimsy understanding of evolutionary psych (which is flimsy as a field already) to confirm your bias. There is some very obvious hang ups on height here as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 02:04 PM
2

I've been there once on a trip and the Seattle Freeze is so bizarre. I feel like people there will straight up ignore you when you talk to them, and not in a NYC way where it's like they're busy and going some where. People will just stand around quietly and look at you and then look away.
/r/seduction08/07/24 02:25 PM
7

you guys really just stand at the drawing board all day long trying to find scape goats instead of working on yourselves
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/24 07:20 PM
–

i don't know what you're going on about, aren't we talking about the perception that women aren't as horny as men?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/24 06:28 PM
4

You also have to consider that men basically only want to have penetrative sex with women which is a very vulnerable position for her to say the least, not to mention many women can't even orgasm from penetrative sex alone. Throw in the risk of STDs, pregnancy etc it all kinda adds up to me
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/24 04:48 PM
10

It’s not just for “major deficiencies”. Even a guy who is average in every sense can up his attractiveness with things like a good haircut, wearing more stylish / better fitting clothes, if he has glasses wear stylish frames. A lot of guys have no sense of style and thus don’t stick out at all from the crowd
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/24 07:28 AM
2

There's a busser at my job (restaurant) that all the female staff say is creepy and it definitely goes along with what other people have been saying about not recognizing (or not caring) that he's making people uncomfortable. He always puts his hand on their waist when he passes, he corners them to talk in the middle of service. Makes weird comments. Thing is, I wouldn't say he's unattractive, but he is creepy in the sense that I'm sure women would feel unsafe to be alone with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/24 03:44 PM
2

I think it's worthwhile to play the fields but by no means necessary.
/r/seduction06/06/24 07:56 PM
1

I personally wouldn't say it is flat out "wrong" in every case no matter what, but I would say it's sus or a yellow flag. Especially if the dude serially dates youngsters. What I've seen from knowing dudes who do it, is that often they are pulling shit a woman their age wouldn't stand for. Younger girls are more likely to not know how to communicate boundaries, identify red flags, know when they're being taken advantage of etc. Trust me, I'm not losing sleep over consensually dating legal adults…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/24 06:07 PM
1

Eh I don’t agree. I think there’s a subset of men especially visible on the internet who are really into dating young girls but it’s not across the boards. Im a 33 y/o male and i cannot imagine trying to date a 20 year old girl whose only like a year or two out of highschool, esp because I used to teach highschool.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/24 05:02 PM
1

I don’t get what you’re saying. Are you saying that inexperienced men in their 30s want women in their early 20s because they’re at the same experience level?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/24 04:46 PM
2

I'm sure the anger and resentment is helping
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/24 06:34 PM
19

Are we supposed to feel bad that the average man doesn't have access to "A buffet of beautiful 20 year old girls"? These posts are so funny seeing guys trying to make logical arguments about why their sexual fantasies should be fulfilled.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/24 03:04 PM
6

This has "while you were out partying, I studied the blade" energy
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/24 02:59 PM
1

the first half of your list just sounds like you have very low self esteem, the rest just sounds like ideas that you personally abide by. I make random small talk with woman all the time, because I'm friendly. Some talk back to me, some might not be interested in talking and I respect it and move on. You're over complicating things
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/24 05:32 PM
14

What's the alternative? Repress yourself youre an entire life because you think that's the only way you'll be accepted or loved? Not worth it.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/24 04:09 PM
4

I think its a good ol case of everyone wants what they can't have
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/24 02:33 PM
–

this makes me think of the movie American Beauty if it was from the perspective of a younger person. The idea of what you're supposed to do and whats supposed to make you fullfilled not really stacking up with your fantasies or ideas of it. Just my two cents
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/24 04:25 PM
3

Money can rent happiness but it can't buy it. Same way it can't buy respect, love, admiration etc. Cumming is short term gratification. Unless you wanna go out like a hedonist on a slow iv drip of morphine until you die, it's really not going to change your world as much as you think.
/r/ExRedPill29/05/24 03:59 PM
8

Its mostly a fantasy because most men will never even come close to living like that so it has a lot of power in its unattainability. A lot of guys would be surprised how unfullfilling it is / how much they don't actually like it if it suddenly became a reality for them.
/r/ExRedPill28/05/24 09:12 PM
–

You're not doing yourself any favors by making wild generalizations about half the population. How could that ever arrive at a logical conclusion? The type of person that would sleep with a red flag guy but not a socalled "good" man would be somebody who has issues they haven't worked through and isn't ready for a relationship. In which case: Why the hell would you want to be in a relationship with that person? Maybe you should have some dignity or self respect in that scenario and walk away? I …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 04:26 PM
12

Therapy is a tool not an end all be all in my opinion. Not all therapy or therapists are equal either. I have benefitted from therapy but I've also dealt with some pretty shitty therapists as well that just gave me empty platitudes and were waiting for the session to be over. Going to therapy as a means of getting laid is just wild, and Idk if that's what you were getting at but that is not advisable in any way shape or form
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/24 05:49 PM
1

sure, and?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/24 07:11 PM
1

I feel like geography, culture and logistics has a lot to do with it. A lot of guys under 30 live with their parents or perhaps aren't making enough money to go out. Not saying this a death sentence but definitely a significant factor. Culture and geography wise..if you live an area with a dense population of other young people, your options are much more. If you live in the burbs and don't have a car or you live in an area that's mostly families / retired people, obviously your odds aren't grea…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/24 03:22 PM
20

To be frank, I think a lot of men are into fat women but they're just ashamed of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/24 02:34 PM
4

No, in person. Don't worry I'll downvote my comments with you so you feel better :)
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/24 05:33 PM
1

Here's an example, I went out with a woman about three times and originally thought she was into me but started to feel like we lacked chemistry. One day I just told her I thought she was cute and wondered if she reciprocated interest. She said no, so I took the rejection in stride and we still are friends without me having ulterior motives. Isn't that hard.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/24 04:10 PM
4

Jesus dude, you are literally perpetuating your own misery. That is deceptive. You are masking your romantic intentions in a platonic facade. Then you have the nerve to be upset when you're the one who isn't being truthful to yourself or others. Be bold, and brave, sack the fuck up and make your intentions known. I know it's scary and rejection sucks, but that's life. Better to get the "no" early on and move on with your life rather than drag things out and deceive yourself that its some how a v…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/24 03:53 PM
3

Who is saying that below average men are pulling women left and right? You are projecting in the most literal sense. It's so funny how many men are stuck on this as if it's some huge injustice that they aren't sleeping with heaps of women every year as an average or below average male. Side not though, don't you think Owen from RSD is pretty average looking? If you dedicate yourself to sleeping with women like its a full time job, you would probably start to see some success, but it's pretty dam…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/24 03:42 PM
5

It’s funny that people who post these types of topics are 100% sure it has nothing to do with their behavior or personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/24 05:37 AM
4

The bible can be interpreted in so many different ways. There are plenty of Christian sects that believe in polygamy, Soloman had like 700 wives I think? It's not that out of the ordinary tbf. Not that I'm caping for them, I think they're deluded losers.
/r/ExRedPill22/05/24 05:42 PM
1

I've lived all over, always easier in cities for me anyway
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/24 07:37 AM
3

Uh ok? If anything that probably reflects your personal demographic and what demographic you attract. How could people from a city be less attractive when there's more people and therefore more chances of meeting people you find attractive? Not getting your logic at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/24 07:09 PM
12

It's not great advice when you're a hard case newbie, you need to get out of your comfort zone and try on different hats. However Id say it comes back around to being good advice once you have some social and seduction skills. I tried really hard to be my idea of a social butterfly, max charisma dude and it just didn't work. I learned very valuable things along the way, but I came around full circle to realizing I just prefer to be more low key. It's funny because now I don't try to be the life …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 02:49 PM
1

Eh, I mean advice should always be taken with a grain of salt. Shouldn't get worked up over it if it doesn't work in every use case. I think some people (me included) had to learn how to socialize and seduce because it didn't come naturally. After getting comfortable with that, and truly being okay on my own, I actually did happen to find a really good relationship without actively looking for one. I think a lot of advice such as "be yourself" isn't great for people on the spectrum or others who…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 02:44 PM
6

Just reminding everybody that most people aren't so chronically online that discourse this silly bothers them, feel free to log off and go outside
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/24 07:08 PM
30

There is a saying “good girls go to heaven but bad girls go everywhere”
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/24 03:23 PM
4

I noticed that too lmao
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/24 06:36 PM
6

Framing issues in terms of red and blue is a false dichotomy. As far as I'm concerned these are niche Internet communities that at times have interesting debates and discourse that I actually enjoy, but every so often you see people like in the OP where it's just like...what's the value in being this invested in what kind of guy has more sex than other guys? Of course you're free to do as you please I just don't get the preoccupation
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/24 06:36 PM
19

who cares dude? This is such a weird preoccupation to have.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/24 03:11 PM
1

You never know man, sometimes people are having a moment in life and they’re craving you but then after they sleep on it and time passes they have a change of heart.
/r/seduction27/04/24 02:12 AM
4

I don't think humans think of things in a cost/benefit analysis mindset when they're making decisions in real time. I think there's an element of social pressure (for some people more than others). I also think that passionate love tends to fizzle out at some point, and maybe people marry when they're passionately in love, but it fades with time. I think married people are primarily life partners, and passionate love is second string to the practicality of building and sustaining a life together…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/24 01:03 AM
1

I don't really understand what you're trying to say in your first paragraph. I'm a man and I'm overweight and I have a hot gf . Why would you resent having to become a better person for people to want to be around you? As for your second paragraph, ask a woman if she's ever felt fear for her safety from a man she rejected. Sexual assault statistics have it that 53% of women have been sexually assaulted at some point in their life.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/24 11:28 PM
1

If your a boomer
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/24 09:04 PM
1

Yes repercussions that on the extreme side would be violence but on the less extreme side be something like making their lives difficult, harassing, pestering etc. My only point on the last part was if all you're offering is sex, then yeah you gotta be attractive l, other wise why would someone want to have sex with you only for looks if you don't have any?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/24 09:03 PM
1

Seems dated to me honestly, like 90s humor.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/24 03:06 PM
1

A couple thoughts Everybody flakes sometimes, life gets busy. If you get bent out of shape from somebody doing it once, you're probably going to turn them off. Some women are too afraid of the repercussions of flat out rejection so they will flake in hopes that you give up on your own. It's more than libido. If all you have to offer is dick, then yeah...it's not that enticing unless you truly are exceptionally attractive. I think men are always very quick to discount the idea of chemistry. If th…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/24 03:00 PM
–

So you swapped out one iteration of reddit advice for another iteration of reddit advice? First of all, anybody can say anything on the internet, you should always take it with a grain of salt. Second of all, I think you're quest for an all encompassing framework of how dating works is what keeps guiding you to these narrow-minded ideologies that keep you chasing your tail forever.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/24 02:49 PM
16

my personal theory (not that it explains everything but is maybe a piece to the puzzle) is that women are raised to be more social than men. When I'm out with my gf she will literally just see another woman and say "oh my god, I love those shoes!" and they might even have a little conversation. Its obviously not the same story for men. At most we might have a casual couple of lines with a cashier or simply nod at other men we're passing by. When we think about lonely women, I think we tend to th…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 05:29 PM
2

Didn't you post this exact same thread yesterday? Its funny that testosterone takes on this esoteric, metaphysical quality in posts like these. As if it's some magic life force. I promise, your problems in dating are a lot less complicated then this insane post it board conspiracy you got going on. Do people like you ever consider that women don't like you because...you don't like women?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 03:11 PM
1

Eh man I still think being a 30 year old with a 19 year old is more sus than being a musician. But to each their own
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 08:41 PM
1

So it's case by case, as I said in my post.. You seem to think I'm saying it's always bad. I've had an age gap fling myself so I'm not confirming it, only saying it can be a yellow flag.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 08:21 PM
1

Would you want your 19 year old daughter/sister dating a thirty year old bartender? Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 07:56 PM
–

I think not being a complete drain to be around will overcome your low testosterone
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 07:47 PM
1

Its case by case, it's hard to just make a sweeping generalization like that. I'd say age gap can be a yellow flag (depending how significant, could be a red flag) that at least perks ones ears up. It's not that the age gap alone is problematic, but it usually is accompanied by other things. Usually it's a guy dating way younger women and theres a power imbalance. Like he has way more money and has power of things like shelter and food over her. Other times it's just something like the older guy…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 06:47 PM
–

Dudes will literally invent a conspiracy around testosterone instead of just face that fact that they suck to be around.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/24 06:41 PM
1

I had a similiar time in college, I had to lower my standards a lot, but I was also hopelessly awkward
/r/seduction15/04/24 12:24 PM
16

“Consent is agreement or permission expressed through affirmative, voluntary words or actions that are mutually understandable to all parties involved, to engage in a specific sexual act at a specific time” Hand on shoulder or top of back is not inherently sexual and can be platonic, that’s why I think it can be a good way to gauge interest. If she recoils or gives any sign of discomfort thats your sign to immediately cease.
/r/seduction14/04/24 01:43 PM
18

Easiest way is to put your hand on their shoulder or upper back. Especially if you’re like telling a joke or something. It’s friendly and non sexual enough that it’s not going to blow up in your face if she’s not into you. That’s a good place to start, you can usually gauge from her reaction if she’s into you or not (recoiling vs smiling etc)
/r/seduction14/04/24 01:10 PM
139

I think there's a couple things happening here. Not being thirsty is attractive. Women, especially attractive women, have to deal with unwanted attention constantly. That and men who will say/do anything to sleep with them. When you don't give off that vibe you may actually intrigue them (wow!) When you are honed in on one person and think it's a matter of just "working hard enough" or "putting in the time"...it's not sexy. It doesn't work like that, and as a result you get way more frustrated (…
/r/seduction12/04/24 12:58 PM
35

Men def have their versions of this, like being up on rapper drama or podcaster/youtuber beefs.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 12:50 PM
2

Just be direct as well
/r/seduction11/04/24 08:42 PM
–

Well thats a convenient belief, anyone can say "they'd like me if I was taller, richer, and better looking". I guess you can just sit back and give up on ever finding love and repeat that mantra to yourself the rest of your life
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/24 05:19 PM
16

if you're going to take a fine-tooth comb to things this small, you're going to have a bad time
/r/seduction11/04/24 02:58 PM
–

I think I'm starting to get it: if a woman rejects you, women's standards are too high. If she goes for the bad boy / asshole her standards are on the floor.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/24 02:56 PM
5

You don’t have to be a bad boy per se. Maybe just more bold. Not just in dating but in life. Like boldly take risks towards doing what you actually want to do. People respect it
/r/seduction10/04/24 06:31 PM
61

"we're both looking for casual encounters" Sounds like she is but you're not. Isn't the nature of a casual encounter to be something either one off, low stakes, no strings attached etc?
/r/seduction10/04/24 02:46 PM
–

Well the world's full of messed up people man, a lot of them mean well but just can't communicate effectively at all. I think it's about learning what the red flags are and then actually heeding them when you see them.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/24 02:36 PM
–

I feel like a lot of you just get your feelings hurt by a really toxic woman and then project that on to the rest of women you're entire life instead of just realizing there are fucked up women just like there are fucked up men.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/24 02:25 PM
3

prob not interested. With shy people just be very nice, build comfort, and be patient.
/r/seduction09/04/24 07:03 PM
1

I think you're looking for an instruction manual based on your comments. Dating, charisma, seduction whatever you want to call it is more intuitive than logical imo.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 11:04 PM
1

Its so funny reading posts like this and not relating to them at all. I live in a big city and pretty much never experience women (or anyone really) being rude to me for now reason. You're like a person on the highway that everyone keeps honking at, and instead of considering that you may be the probelm you think "why does everyone keep honking at me? They're so rude, I'm not even doing anything"
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 04:01 PM
1

So I know a Venezuelan girl who did something similar. She married her husband as a virgin but then they divorced and she started going on dates. Our mutual friend told me she would just be straight forward on the date and tell them that she would go home with them if they paid her. It was interesting to me because it seemed a little different than straight up prostitution. Like she was dating for fun and wanted to have a sex life after only being with her husband her whole life. The money was j…
/r/seduction08/04/24 01:20 PM
2

I mean right out the gate you got game playing, I wouldn't personally
/r/seduction07/04/24 11:44 AM
–

You know there was a lot more casual sex in the past. AIDS is what really put an end to that. People are having less sex historically now then ever, so maybe you’re the one living in the past.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/24 07:24 PM
–

Sex is so much more of a risk for women though. Pregnancy, the fact that they are generally physically weaker than men (threat of violence) and are the ones who get penetrated. Not to mention most women don’t cum from penetrative sex… imo I think women don’t place sex on as much of a pedestal as men tend to
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/24 06:36 PM
232

I would say for most people, if they don't feel a physical spark they aren't going to waste their time past a second or third date. (There are asexual people and low libido people though so not always true) However, there's nuance, and you shouldn't just hail mary go for the kiss out of the blue. Look into escalation and building comfort. Play with tension, flirt, etc.
/r/seduction06/04/24 02:31 PM
–

This is kind of a straw man, nobody is saying that simply dating/marrying people from countries is wrong, that's asinine. What people tend to not like is their criticisms and attitudes, vilifying so-called "modern women" and blaming them for everything. They're basically just international version of redpillers. If somebody from another country consensually agrees to date them or what have you, that's their business, and I supremely don't give af. I do think they're behavior and attitudes are eg…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/24 03:46 PM
2

this just seems like splitting hairs, like we really need to ask ourselves why tf are we getting this minute about perceived advantages and disadvantages in dating? On a real level, who cares and what does it matter?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/24 03:08 PM
2

Love, romance, and sex has always been one of the greatest of human desires. There are a million movies, books, songs, etc about it. It has never been easy for anybody at any point in time, it's something that's always been characterized by difficulty, pain, and emotions. People are always going to find a scapegoat to blame, love is a battlefield, you most certainly are going to endure some pain and suffering when you get romantically involved with someone. So yeah, people will be complaining ab…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/24 06:54 PM
5

Is this conclusion maybe coming from the fact that you yourself are using social media too much and therefore you are being bombarded with images and videos of influencer couples thus skewing your outlook on women in general?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/24 06:44 PM
59

I mean man, messaging their friends is usually not going to go over well. How would you react if you went on a date with a woman and she was hitting up one of your friends? That more so just boils down to jealousy that pretty much everybody goes through. As for having HR called on you, Idk man, that's never happened to me and I've hooked up with multiple coworkers at different jobs, though I certainly don't recommend it. I feel like HR usually only gets involved when it becomes harassment. I've …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/24 06:41 PM
3

The type of nice guys that women don't like are dudes that are fake or transactional with their "niceness". Example: you kiss her ass, compliment her a lot, never show any kind of crack in your facade of being Mr right. Then...you slowly become frustrated when you don't get what you want which is sex. She has been picking up on this act all along and strategically planning how to let you down easy (never forget women have a valid fear of upsetting men). When you finally realize she's not interes…
/r/seduction27/03/24 06:17 PM
-4

I dated casually a lot in my twenties, good experiences, now im 33 in a committed relationship that I hope lasts a very long time (don't necessarily believe in marriage). We're open which has been working out great, I still get to experience the fun and excitement of flings while still having the stability of a consistent partner.
/r/seduction27/03/24 04:52 PM
1

No. The only way is to disappear and reemerge years later a different man. But even that's not guaranteed
/r/seduction27/03/24 01:44 AM
1

Maybe just tell her where you're at. That you are a little scarred from your last relationship and that school has to come first. She may feel a similiar way, no need to throw the baby out with the bath water if you got a good thing going
/r/seduction23/03/24 03:00 PM
10

If it's the first time and she's not crazy late, "no problem". I'm not going to give her shit for it, I'm pretty easy going, and she might even feel bad about it enough already. If it's habitual? Some people just have a different relationship with time. If I like her I probably would continue to see her but I won't show up exactly on time either anymore. My dads gf is very bad with time and he gets absolutely livid every time she's late, which is kinda dumb to me, because, he knows she's like th…
/r/seduction23/03/24 02:58 PM
3

For anything worth doing/learning/pursuing in life, it is ineffective to rely on motivation or an urge to do it. Repetition, routine, habit...these are what bring success. Become the social guy who talks to strangers, practicing a little every day, eventually you will be meeting people without trying
/r/seduction21/03/24 10:26 PM
1

Do some googling about women orgasming from penetrative sex alone, it's not very high. Most men aren't going to wow a woman in bed the first time having sex. It's more of a mental thing, keep her mind turned on. It's worth learning how to give good head too.
/r/seduction20/03/24 03:00 PM
13

33, youngest I'll go is like 25. Any younger and I feel like I'm chaperoning a teenager. I also taught highschool for a bit so dating young gives me major ick. I love being older, don't miss my 20s at all. My game has changed so much now too. I feel like I've become such a minimalist, I really don't try that hard or even speak that much. Also I don't feel a need to go out a lot or drink a lot. It's been great
/r/seduction18/03/24 02:07 PM
1

Yeah, I'm realizing now that I misread that
/r/seduction17/03/24 03:58 PM
5

local farmer's market (At least where I live in a big city), beach, park, bars... think where do people go to unwind after working all week? I will say though, if you just make it a habit of talking to random people and strangers, it doesn't matter where you go, you can meet people in random ass places.
/r/seduction17/03/24 02:40 PM
1

Would typically say no, but if you're going away, it could be nice, just don't expect it to be some kind of transaction where you get laid because of it.
/r/seduction17/03/24 02:30 PM
20

I know people say it's a numbers game, but I think there is such a thing as casting too large of a net. Why not dial back the numbers a little bit but try to make them more quality? Women don't want to feel like you're just taking a swing at anything. ALSO: depending how big/small you're college campus is, you could gain a reputation as the dude who asks everyone out which could complicate things.
/r/seduction17/03/24 02:26 PM
3

Impossible to pinpoint a problem unless we had a video or could be flies on the wall. If you had to guess what it was, what would you think? Sometimes the chemistry just isn’t there and it’s not necessarily a personal failure
/r/seduction16/03/24 01:13 PM
6

Something I notice in a lot of these posts is that it's always framed as if 100% of the "work" (lack of better term) of a relationship falls on the man. It's rarely framed in terms of two people coming together to make a relationship work out. the whole "She's going to get bored, find a better guy" line is just pessimism/jadedness that comes from being hurt in the past. Things don't have to last forever to mean something. And as for "there's two types of girls" you're basically saying there's tr…
/r/seduction15/03/24 01:44 PM
276

That's a sign that they've been in and are used to toxic relationships. That they are unaware and unprepared on how to be in a healthy relationship. I used to get bent out of shape and think "why does she only date assholes", but now that I'm older I realize you should actually feel bad for people like that. Also, being in a toxic relationship is bad for you too. You shouldnt ever strive to be more toxic or want a toxic partner for yourself
/r/seduction12/03/24 12:35 PM
3

Yeah the fear doesn't go away completely but it becomes more manageable and less overwhelming
/r/seduction10/03/24 11:53 AM
3

Yeah Ive normalized it at this point but that's still my frame. Working in bars helped a lot, also traveling long term forced me to be outgoing with strangers. I also worked as a teacher that eliminated my fears of addressing groups and projecting my voice. Honestly, most people are busy worrying about themselves then to judge you for talking to them as a stranger. 9/10 they'll be worried that they're the weird ones lol
/r/seduction10/03/24 02:28 AM
15

My mantra: I'm a harmless, social guy who is very friendly and talks to strangers. If people don't want to talk to me that's fine, I don't need them to like me and I'll still wish them well with a smile. Everyone has something interesting to teach me, I just need to find out what it is. I'm out to have fun, I don't take myself that seriously, I can laugh at myself. Im fun loving and chill, most people would like me if they got to know me. I know that's a lot but that's the kind of frame I try to…
/r/seduction09/03/24 11:42 PM
26

OLD is a double edged sword in that it's easier to be put in front of more women but also just as easy to be rejected. If you focus on meeting people IRL you will stand out for actually having confidence / social skills, plus you don't have to arrange a meet up, you can establish chemistry/interest then and there
/r/seduction07/03/24 04:32 PM
1

I would say something off hand / disarming with not too much investment on your end. Observational things (do not comment on her body): "i like your hair/shoes/shirt etc", "Thats a great band, have you heard xyz by them?" (If she had a band shirt on).
/r/seduction06/03/24 10:20 PM
7

Remember that anyone you meet in this life is flawed, infatuation (imo) is fueled by fantasy and desire. Nobody is going to fall out of the sky and save you or whisk you away to the happy life you deserve. If you really wanna get into it, this infatuation you suffer from tends to come from a place of insecurity. Even more than the woman herself, you are chasing her validation so that you can know that there's nothing wrong with you, that you are desirable etc. On to practical advice... 1) Keep m…
/r/seduction04/03/24 12:36 PM
1

i got it from a ram dass lecture, (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9GN8p-uaYME) this is like the direct passage, it's from a longer lecture thats well worth listening to but I can't find it
/r/seduction01/03/24 02:41 AM
1

Hm, well one thing I've had in my mind for the longest is "wanting less out of interactions", which is just another way of saying outcome independence. Not caring which way a social interaction goes, not overly caring if the other person likes me or thinks I'm cool. Even though you're trying to be kind and make them "feel special", that's still something you want out of the interaction and I think people intrinsically sense when somebody wants them to behave or respond a certain way and naturall…
/r/seduction29/02/24 11:00 PM
2

When I stopped focusing on seduction mainly, and broadened my goals to developing more social skills in general. If you're good at socializing, you will meet more people, hear about more events, still build up those core skills like confidence and appearing at ease in social situations. I think a lot of dudes, esp younger guys these days, hyper focus on women to the point that they're just sitting in their rooms swiping on apps until their fingers hurt. You are not improving yourself doing this,…
/r/seduction29/02/24 11:55 AM
4

My read is that you were too excited and should have chilled your jets more
/r/seduction20/02/24 09:30 PM
2

She said she wants to be friends, the matter is already settled. You are going to waste your own time and break your own heart if you think you can flip things around if only you say or do the right thing.meet other women
/r/seduction20/02/24 02:09 AM
1

When I was young and desperate yes, now, not at all
/r/seduction18/02/24 02:34 PM
11

I'm a very friendly, outgoing person, this is what I do. Toe the line, be flirty, drop a compliment every so often, use touch to your advantage. Be cool. IE don't blow their phone up, give them their space, occupy that perfect middle ground of wanting them but not caring which way it goes either. Keep it moving, keep meeting people Be explicit/straight forward when it's appropriate and then accept the "no" if that's the answer and move on. I think the typical "wrong" moves people do when in the …
/r/seduction15/02/24 01:24 PM
1

If you have to ask..
/r/seduction09/02/24 12:39 PM
0

Well generally speaking the closer to a city the better, and further out the harder time you'll have. Makes sense just from a numbers stand point. Any time I've been in the burbs it's been quite hard, I had most luck with the apps but I had to widen my location and id be matching with people super far away from me. Rural is even worse because you have your dating pool and that's it. Sometimes you get lucky but usually not haha. I think Chicago has been the best place for me personally. Lots of s…
/r/seduction04/02/24 08:51 PM
0

I'm in a major city so for me it can be as simple as going to a bar I know a lot of singles go to. Otherwise I social surf by hanging out with a work friend and their friends, network, hang with those friends and meet their friends etc. Other ways could be joining an intermural sport team, joining a club, taking classes for exercise/dance/yoga etc. I've lived in a variety of different areas and I will say environment can make a big difference. If you live in a suburb where people move to to rais…
/r/seduction04/02/24 07:40 PM
1

Tough question there, don't want to mislead you or give you bad advice. Look up "demisexuality" you might relate to it, if I understand correctly it's when you're only interested in being with people you trust and have a connection with. It might not hurt to just put yourself out there and get experience in dating even if you're not crazy about the person. I didn't have a fulfilling relationship until I was like 31, twenties was a lot of bad experiences that became lessons.
/r/seduction02/02/24 09:54 PM
1

Find new women, wouldn't advise trying to game established friends. Are you in a small town or something ?
/r/seduction02/02/24 09:22 PM
1

I would recommend you to look into escalation and the escalation ladder. You're probably comfortable in a platonic role because it's safe and what you know. I think a big reason guys stay viewed as platonic is because they don't touch enough. Now be careful, obviously unwanted touch is a no no and you should cease the moment you feel your touch is unwanted. Start with small things like nudging, hitting their shoulder after a joke, these are neutral and if she seems okay with it you can take it f…
/r/seduction02/02/24 08:42 PM
3

If you had to self diagnose, where do you think you're fumbling the ball?
/r/seduction02/02/24 12:48 AM
5

there's no "solving" it man, you obviously aren't compatible, sexual or otherwise like you said.
/r/seduction29/01/24 12:09 PM
2

I think it's difficult for young men, specifically like 24 and younger. I don't really buy into the idea that its at an all time high, if anything social media and dating apps make it easier than ever to put yourself out there, to the point that you dont even have to have the confidence to approach in real life. I'm not going to talk down on myself but I don't think strangers would rank me in the top 20% of men, financially or look wise, and I find dating to be quite easy. I think men get frustr…
/r/seduction12/12/23 06:28 PM
1

50% of marriages end in divorce, people just tend to grow apart i think
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/23 07:41 PM
5

As much as desperation sends people running, true security in oneself is the essence of attraction .
/r/seduction07/07/23 04:19 AM
3

“Being a pussy” implies taking those traits to a negative extreme, so yeah obviously nobody wants to date someone who’s a mopey sack of goo. You can be all those things (sensitive, kind, caring) in a balanced manner that isn’t taken to a negative extreme.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/23 03:06 AM
3

I feel like this feeling never goes away from me because everybody is unique in some way
/r/seduction11/06/23 12:10 AM
1

Intimacy issues. at least I find myself in conflict between a rewarding monogamous relationship and wanting to be single all the time. Really hard calls to make in life
/r/seduction11/06/23 12:09 AM
1

Self improvement , exercising, drive are all attractive qualities but they’re not inherently masculine. I’m not even anti masculinity, it’s just funny to me when people put it on a pedestal. It’s like astrology for men
/r/seduction21/05/23 04:18 PM
1

Big beefy muscle body’s are for the consumption of other men, not women. Gymcels are a thing for a reason
/r/seduction19/05/23 08:31 PM
0

This is diarrhea brain logic. Nobody can even agree across the boards what masculinity is. There’s women who are into femboys and twinks and non-traditionally masculine men. I think it’s good to experiment and get to know yourself better but going through the “fight club” phase is usually a pretty cringe look and totally see through
/r/seduction19/05/23 04:11 PM
30

Kinda corny tbh
/r/seduction15/04/23 02:06 PM
21

I feel like people are taking things too seriously. Of course no dating advice will work 100% of the time, but thinking in demographics is pretty good general advice. A lot of people have “types” and you will notice that the women you tend to attract will have commonalities
/r/seduction11/04/23 10:39 PM
1

Personally no, but just pointing out that someone can be in to you and not have sex with you, that’s all
/r/seduction05/11/22 05:36 AM
6

I would text immediately with my name so they have it. Then Id wait maybe a day or two and ask her out. First something like “hey how’s your day going” just to gauge interest and then I’d be like “how’s your week looking? I’ve been wanting to try this (insert bar, cafe, restaurant). Wanna come with?”
/r/seduction01/11/22 11:59 PM
77

When people cheat, a lot of the time they made the decision to break up with you a while ago and are processing it while still being with you. That’s why cheating hurts so much, is because the other person doesn’t even know there’s a problem and it’s like the rug gets pulled out from under them. If it had to with your attractiveness they wouldn’t have stayed with you six years.
/r/seduction01/11/22 06:04 PM
1

Just do it man even if she’s not interested she’ll be flattered.
/r/seduction01/11/22 04:17 AM
1

Just do it man even if she’s not interested she’ll be flattered.
/r/seduction01/11/22 04:11 AM
10

Chaotic neutral
/r/seduction01/11/22 04:08 AM
1

No, snip it off right now
/r/seduction31/10/22 08:38 PM
26

Reading through these comments may offer an answer as to why women may choose not to have sex lol
/r/seduction31/10/22 04:37 PM
1

Eh, not everyone has the same sex drive
/r/seduction31/10/22 02:52 AM
15

Oh man caffeine like 9 out of 10 times is fine for me but every so often it makes me like manically depressed and like my life is over beyond repair. The kicker is it’s probably the hardest of all the things you listed to quit
/r/seduction31/10/22 01:33 AM
1

You can still have an abundance mindset even if you’re on a year dry spell. It’s knowing that no girl is the last one. Knowing you have worth beyond material circumstances. It’s when the desperation sets in that you become repulsive (as in the opposite of attractive). Abundance mind state doesn’t necessarily bring people in, but it’s the mind state that keeps you optimistic and secure in yourself
/r/seduction28/10/22 11:59 PM
2

I meant date wise if dinner is too formal
/r/seduction28/10/22 02:03 PM
5

I don’t understand being that afraid of a woman lol. Then tell her you prefer something more casual? This seems like such a non issue to me.
/r/seduction28/10/22 02:02 PM
2

Whats gonna happen that you’re so scared of?
/r/seduction28/10/22 01:51 PM
6

I mean it’s not like I do it 100% of the time, I just don’t really see the issue or care very much? I mean if it’s like a fancy dinner, that’s kinda weird. But going somewhere casual for dinner, I don’t see a problem.
/r/seduction28/10/22 01:47 PM
4

TBH it’s never crossed my mind that someone would try to go out with me as an excuse for a free meal and Idt it’s ever happened. They p much always insist on splitting the check on the first date
/r/seduction28/10/22 01:43 PM
1

I don’t really worry about what I say too much. I think less is more. Your profile should speak for itself. I just say anything to see if I even get a response. If they respond back and we chat a little bit I can safely assume they’re probably interested in meeting. I litterally just say how’s your day going and go from there.
/r/seduction26/10/22 11:50 PM
7

It makes sense, everybody wants to date up, nobody goes out looking to date down
/r/seduction26/10/22 04:01 PM
19

The issue is your title is very strongly worded and seems a bit bitter. Saying women are more superficial than men based off your one experience of being ghosted comes across as bitter. Are men not superficial? A lot of the men in this sub are delusional with their expectations vs what they bring to the table as well. Yeah lack of physical attraction can def be a reason but it’s far from the only one.
/r/seduction26/10/22 04:00 PM
1

For me: Art, speaking other languages, traveling
/r/seduction26/10/22 03:15 PM
3

Everyone knows some guy who’s an absolute loser and dirtbag by every metric except for the fact that he gets laid
/r/seduction25/10/22 08:35 PM
0

Idk man if you really want to get to the bottom of it you could try a therapy app, as the best you’ll get from Reddit is armchair speculation
/r/seduction24/10/22 11:36 PM
0

Do you feel like this behavior is bad for you? Does it impact your life in undesirable ways?
/r/seduction24/10/22 11:13 PM
2

Your fine. Well for working out maybe you could take some kind of group exercise class? I just moved to a new city, I’m about to go sign up at yoga studio. Other than that maybe you can find a study group for your school? A friend of mine plays ultimate frisbee in a park every week with a group. Do some research on your hobbies and see if there’s groups in the area doing that activity.
/r/seduction24/10/22 09:17 PM
1

Good luck man. Living in nyc is on my bucket list for sure. I’ve only visited a few times, it’s fun af out there
/r/seduction24/10/22 06:32 PM
2

Just keep putting yourself out there. I have to tell myself that as well. We’re not going to meet anyone locked away in our rooms. I think it helps to focus on being more sociable in general
/r/seduction24/10/22 06:14 PM
13

I don’t think the difference is between men and women as much as just the mindset. Have you never hooked up with a woman and then lost interest while she continues trying to get with you? I do agree that I think women tend to be more present then men though. Personally I think they process their emotions and move on a lot more effectively than us too. I think men run into this problem a lot because they may be under socialized and therefore getting a serotonin hit form flirting feels really sign…
/r/seduction24/10/22 06:11 PM
1

I said “one of the best” not “the best”. Chicago has a huge dating pool and it has less of a status culture than a place like LA, MIA, or NYC. I know living there sucks, thats why I don’t anymore, but the dating scene is much better than it is in the majority of the country. I was in Las Vegas for a few months, awful lol.
/r/seduction24/10/22 05:37 AM
0

Obsessed before you’ve even been on a date is setting yourself up for failure.
/r/seduction24/10/22 03:34 AM
18

Man I used to be an OLD defender but it really seems to be past it’s golden era, at least for me. I get burnt out on crowds easily but decided to go party hopping last night and had so many confidence boosting interactions. Whereas these days OLD just thrives on making its customers feel insecure and unattractive
/r/seduction23/10/22 09:09 PM
2

Idk she’s kinda weird. She’s pretty but she strikes me as inexperienced. Seems like the type to get obsessed which is why it was kind of a turn off
/r/seduction23/10/22 08:56 PM
3

Yeah I hung out with a girl a few times, said we’re better off as friends. Took her at her word, which I don’t think she was expecting. Tables turned and she started chasing me and being overly flirtatious. I honestly kinda just lost interest and started seeing somebody else though.
/r/seduction23/10/22 08:50 PM
-2

Joker moment
/r/seduction23/10/22 08:33 PM
1

I like your chill response.
/r/seduction23/10/22 08:10 PM
2

“Simp” is old pimp slang. Same as a “square” or a “lame”. Follows the rules, worships the ground his woman walks on, buys her flowers, gets played etc. Someone who isn’t hip to the game. It’s definition has definitely evolved now that it’s been picked up by gen z and internet culture. It’s ultimately just a word with no real concrete definition. I think of it as someone who loses their spine and will bend over backwards thinking that will get them what they want in regards to dating.
/r/seduction23/10/22 07:00 PM
1

People take disagreement with this statement to mean that we’re anti-fitness. Im def pro fitness, especially with all the mental health benefits. That being said. I just disagree. I’ve seen scrawny, malnourished, chain smokers kill it, not that you want to be them. I’ve also known fat bartenders to kill it. I lost a lot of weight now that I don’t drink anymore, but I was pretty fat (not obese) and hooking up with hot women. Again, not saying you should say fuck it to your health. Just saying I’v…
/r/seduction23/10/22 06:54 PM
2

Wow Reddit is in a sensitive place this morning
/r/seduction23/10/22 06:42 PM
-1

You sound like the triggered one man I just found the comment funny
/r/seduction23/10/22 05:07 PM
0

Men care more about being jacked than women do lmao.
/r/seduction23/10/22 04:53 PM
5

Of course man. Everything i say to you is out of love and compassion
/r/seduction22/10/22 07:13 AM
8

I have the opposite problem where I dance and girls come up to me but I never know what to say because I can’t hear shit over the music
/r/seduction21/10/22 11:04 PM
2

Idk man that sucks. I was dating this girl and she really borders on asexual, like doesn’t even like hugging or being touched. Sucks because in every other way we were a good match, but I just knew that would be so unfulfilling for me. Just tell her how unsatisfied it makes you feel and see if it’s something you could work up to, or slowly integrate.
/r/seduction21/10/22 10:42 PM
4

It’s fine man. Don’t obsess. You’re not an idiot, they don’t teach us this stuff in school. The truth is that’s not an ideal situation to begin with. You’re right, she’s at work, it’s not super appropriate to ask her out, it’s not much better asking her out later either. Does that mean chances are 0? No, but they’re not great either. Try joining clubs or volunteering or going to social events. Online dating kind of sucks but better odds. I’m no expert just trying to help
/r/seduction21/10/22 10:23 PM
3

Look man, I get it, most of us come to these communities because we lack some social skills / awareness. I’m very anxious and spectrummy, trust me I get it. What a lot of people like us don’t realize is that the average person doesn’t live in there head like we do. It’s not that you’re a creepy or malicious person, it’s that your kinda throwing curve balls. Try to become more present and in the moment. I know that’s easier said than done, but the chances of her wanting to go out with you, let al…
/r/seduction21/10/22 09:08 PM
1

It could be anything. Could even be something like she’s dating someone else and feels guilty, or hung up on an ex, potential reasons are endless
/r/seduction21/10/22 06:40 PM
6

Mm you missed your chance, should have said it in the moment. You could still shoot your shot but I wouldn’t hold your breath
/r/seduction21/10/22 04:18 PM
1

I mean if that’s your only goal yeah that’s tacky and dumb. I grew up with sisters so I’m not bothered hanging out with women platonically, but I understand that doesn’t work for a lot of guys.
/r/seduction21/10/22 03:22 PM
1

Yeah, wish I encountered it more. Only time I’ve had such a successful fwb
/r/seduction21/10/22 03:12 PM
1

Yeah that’s what I’m saying, if you don’t like them then don’t lie to yourself
/r/seduction21/10/22 03:07 PM
1

Ooooh. Well you never know. Again, it’s not like you have to hang out and shit. Can just be casual meme sharing friends. It depends, if there’s int friend chemistry then why pursuit that?
/r/seduction21/10/22 03:02 PM
1

LMAO “male oriented interests” doesn’t come off the way you think it does 😂
/r/seduction21/10/22 02:52 PM
1

Simp is a mindset. If you agree to be friends with her but just keep shooting shot after shot, yeah that’s sad. Being friends with a woman doesn’t mean asking them to hang out every day and obsessing over them. Just treat them like one of the homies, you never know who they could introduce you to, or connect you with. One of my woman friends just got me a job the other day.
/r/seduction21/10/22 02:50 PM
2

I’ve had a casual hook up relationship with this one girl for years. It’s pretty perfect, both of us like staying single and don’t care what the other one does. It helps that we don’t live in the same area. Anytime I hit her up though, we usually go do some activity and if the mood is right, hookup afterwards
/r/seduction21/10/22 02:46 PM
1

I think environment plays a lot into too. Like it’s easier for me to have a hook up vibe in a “hook up” environment such as a bar or party. During the day, it’s kinda hard for me to have that same vibe. Just something I’ve noticed
/r/seduction21/10/22 02:44 PM
2

The girl I’m hooking up with now, we regularly call each other “friend”. Sometimes it just kinda reinforces the idea that we’re not boyfriend and girlfriend
/r/seduction21/10/22 02:42 PM
5

This content is borderline predatory, pretty gross man
/r/seduction21/10/22 02:41 PM
1

Reading between the lines, you described her as nervous. You may be coming on a little too strong for her. Probably better to be indirect with someone like that, at least in the beginning. Like just invite her to lunch or something without calling it a date.
/r/seduction21/10/22 02:39 PM
2

Most of the time it means just that, they like you as a friend but don’t feel romantic chemistry. Either agree and be friends or just say you’re not interested. DO NOT agree to be friends while harboring feelings and trying to ware her down into liking you. That never works. I’ve been able to flip the ljbf things a couple of times. In those circumstances it felt more like they weren’t ready to be sexual in the moment and wanted more time to warm up and get comfortable. But I always respected the…
/r/seduction21/10/22 02:37 PM
19

This isn’t uncommon, sometimes people lose their nerve. There was probably just something she didn’t vibe with and she doesn’t have the balls to tell you
/r/seduction21/10/22 02:31 PM
8

If she didn’t want to, you probably couldn’t have done much to convince her otherwise. Just be cool about it from here on out, giver her time and space and don’t get hung up on the outcome. Focus on other things in your life for the time being.
/r/seduction20/10/22 11:26 PM
7

Sorry man it’s probably her or your friend ultimately. You could bring it up your friend but chances are he’ll be butt hurt and ask you not to do it. Alternatively, you could just go for it and he will probably be embarrassed and devastated and not talk to you again when he finds out. Choose wisely. I was in this situation and chose wrong, friend still doesn’t talk to me 6 years later.
/r/seduction20/10/22 09:50 PM
1

I’m sure your very normal and cool 🤘
/r/seduction20/10/22 03:17 PM
-7

Mm man unless they are in the minority of women who can cum from penetration / cum quickly, they likely are not going to enjoy casual sex that much. Just my two cents, she agreed to hang out as a little last minute activity before she went home.
/r/seduction20/10/22 02:22 AM
2

It’s good to learn when your young that sex like many other things in life will not make you happy. It’ll keep you distracted and preoccupied when it’s a novel experience or hard to get, but you’ll eventually realize it’s not the golden ticket you think it is
/r/seduction20/10/22 02:17 AM
14

Eh Tbh bro I don’t agree with the commenter responding to you. I think your assumption is right. If she was down to fuck she would have went with you. Life isn’t porn, it’s not like every woman is down to fuck at the drop of a hat, some really just want to kill time in an enjoyable manner. I feel like if she was set on fucking you she would have. Like unless you said something rediculously heinous, I don’t see how you could have “messed up”
/r/seduction20/10/22 02:14 AM
1

Mm ignoring can work but not always. I think people in general are attracted to those who are in their own lane and have a sense of direction. When you’re too available it can show that you don’t have anything going on. Ignoring can make you appear like that person, but it won’t work that well if you don’t actually have that confidence and direction yourself
/r/seduction19/10/22 09:47 PM
1

It helps A LOT. But no, not necessary at all
/r/seduction18/10/22 05:59 AM
5

I mean that’s very subjective, some people peak in highschool,some in their twenties, people will have different experiences. My optimum time was my mid twenties but I also worked in a poppin bar district in a big city, so that helped a lot. In my early thirties now and COVID is largely to blame, but feel like I lost a lot of my mojo
/r/seduction13/10/22 03:26 PM
1

Mmm, wrigleyville and lakeview come to mind, however those will be a little more pricey areas but no where near LA prices.
/r/seduction06/10/22 05:12 PM
18

Chicago is a good option. Many people there are working class, it’s pretty affordable, lots of young people, still have yet to find a better dating scene than I experienced there
/r/seduction06/10/22 04:38 AM
-1

Because of their skin color? Sounds like some weird internal shit you’re projecting dude
/r/seduction04/10/22 04:10 AM
6

Damn man why do you dislike brown girls so much? It’s not like being white automatically makes you a prize.
/r/seduction04/10/22 12:30 AM
1

Too much expectations and pressure on her. Better not to start out at your place until you’re already seeing eachother
/r/seduction03/10/22 05:16 PM
3

That’s maybe the best explanation of the friendzone I’ve ever heard
/r/seduction03/10/22 03:11 AM
3

Just ask her to catch up over coffee, it’s low pressure, and from there you can feel out if there’s attraction
/r/seduction02/10/22 05:31 PM
31

It feels true for me and my personal experience. I used to get super attached to everyone I dated, then I hit a promiscuous streak and now I have no interest in committed relationships. Could be other factors as well, but yeah, I don’t really feel strong connections the way I used to
/r/seduction02/10/22 02:35 PM
1

Focus on your breath, relax your toes, or if you have to fidget, fidget in your toes. I say that because people can’t see you doing it. Fidgeting legs, arms, or hands will show your anxious.
/r/seduction30/09/22 04:22 PM
1

College and early twenties sucked for me. Dating life didn’t get good until about 25
/r/seduction29/09/22 04:05 PM
1

People lose their nerve. Think post-nut clarity. She may have been super horny the night you went out, but after sleeping on it, that luster fades away
/r/seduction27/09/22 07:25 AM
1

I did that more when I was early to mid twenties, I don’t like hooking up drunk anymore, too much room for miscommunication and weird aftermaths. That’s just me though
/r/seduction24/09/22 01:50 AM
161

Strike while the iron is hot. After aging and gaining more experience I’ve learned that that window of opportunity is pretty real and will eventually close if you don’t act
/r/seduction24/09/22 01:44 AM
2

Most “rules” are for newbies and people just say it because a newbie is more prone to over texting. Once you have some experience, the “rules” don’t matter as much
/r/seduction21/09/22 01:20 AM
1

I like the “hell yea” method which is basically to not invest too much time and energy into people if they’re less than enthusiastic about seeing you
/r/seduction20/09/22 10:33 PM
3

That wouldn’t make sense, surely she must know he’s a tourist and that repeat business would be unlikely. It’s like a golden rule among sex workers to always get money first. Kinda crazy she didn’t change though, don’t know why she would do that.
/r/seduction15/09/22 09:29 PM
1

Don’t you feel like you’re holding back your own development by dating somebody so young? I can’t imagine what you have in common
/r/seduction15/09/22 09:24 PM
1

It’s hard to say without you telling us more details like age, your approach, what kind of area you live in etc. Could be any number of reasons. Some regions have more of a hookup culture than others ime.
/r/seduction15/09/22 09:22 PM
12

Do you want to be penpals or do you want to date them? It’s okay to be friendly but cut to chase
/r/seduction15/09/22 09:19 PM
1

Being direct. You obviously can be too direct but most guys suffer from the Opposite. It’s incredibly unattractive when a guy is passive aggressive or just won’t come out and say what’s on his mind. Nobody can read your mind, and if she’s got any experience in dating she’ll know a guy who can’t communicate is a waste of time.
/r/seduction15/09/22 09:18 PM
3

Wouldn’t get hung up on her or invest too much emotionally. That’s very recent and depending how long they were together she may need a lot of time to process it. I def wouldn’t be considering a relationship if I were you
/r/seduction14/09/22 04:53 PM
1

Some times people lose their nerve. Or she might have been drunk and didn’t remember much of it the next day? Maybe she’s cheating on someone? There’s a million and one reasons why she could have done what she did, but I don’t think it was you who fucked up. Charge it to the game and keep moving forward
/r/seduction14/09/22 04:43 AM
2

Someone who is looking for casual sex won’t find it a turn on, but that’s not what you want so why do you care? Focus on finding someone with the same values.
/r/seduction12/09/22 06:29 PM
1

I think a lot of cheaters break up with you mentally first and then cheat as a way to process and get over it. Sucks and is totally shitty to their partner. I think biggest red flag for me these days is weak communication skills. I’m too old to play games.
/r/seduction12/09/22 06:19 PM
4

You’re right, there’s no harm in asking. If she feels some type of way that’s on her
/r/seduction17/06/22 04:22 AM
-1

It works for me. If you’re chill and not a chode about it
/r/seduction15/05/22 12:42 AM
9

Just have a check-in type conversation. I’d say something like “I enjoy going out with you and don’t have any interest in seeing anyone else right now. Where are you at mentally/emotionally?” Then I would just go from there
/r/seduction14/05/22 05:12 PM
1

It’s just banter dude
/r/seduction29/04/22 01:32 PM
2

I literally stopped wearing any kind of deodorant a year or two ago. I feel like as long as I stay on top of showering, it’s not a big deal
/r/seduction24/04/22 03:47 PM
1

Trust me man it’s not all that it’s cracked up to be. A lot of guys get caught up in their body counts and chase that for years until they finally feel validated in their own minds. There was one era in my life where I was having a lot of sex with different people and tbh I think the majority of them were pretty unsatisfying. I feel like half the time while having sex all I could think about was how mediocre it was and how I just wanted to get away from them after cumming. I think everyone whose…
/r/seduction11/04/22 07:50 PM
30

Context is key here. Ideally your partner is supportive, but it’s also on you to not put undue stress on your partner. They have to do this life thing too and it’s not easy for them either. You should work on it yourself and be specific with your partner on how they can help you (ie, “can I have a hug?” Or “I just need to be alone right now”)
/r/seduction06/04/22 08:00 PM
3

Move on. You should talk to then in person first, and ask for their social media if you want to add them. Just adding them out of no where comes off creepy
/r/seduction03/04/22 06:21 AM
5

Being different than what she’s used to is all you need sometimes. I’m a vagabond with not much money and I’ve hooked up with rich people because they think I’m interesting and I’m different then their peers
/r/seduction26/03/22 07:50 PM
1

Ok man wallow in pity then lol
/r/seduction20/03/22 09:15 PM
1

Ok why would she date you you if she didn’t find you attractive? And you said in your OP that she laughed which to me just sounds like being cruel for the sake of being cruel. The vast majority of people are average, I mean that’s what average means right? There’s nothing wrong with that. You may never be on the level of a YouTube pick up artist but who cares? Those guys literally commit their lives to it. You’ll do fine, sounds like you have been doing fine, you’re just raw and reeling from thi…
/r/seduction20/03/22 08:08 PM
8

Bro stop now. Pull yourself together. Next thing you know you’re going to be on incel forums. She probably was just trying to hurt your feelings on purpose. That was really messed up of her, and I can surely understand how that blow to your ego must feel. But don’t start spiraling. The whole rating attractiveness on a 1-10 scale is inherently flawed. People have preferences and types they go for. Haven’t you ever found somebody hot that your friend doesn’t? Don’t start acting like the phantom of…
/r/seduction20/03/22 07:53 PM
3

It’s not bad to use but def bad to rely on as your only method of meeting people
/r/seduction19/03/22 09:53 PM
3

I know the feeling man, been there
/r/seduction19/03/22 07:55 PM
43

Dude she’s cheating on her boyfriend, she’s not being clear with him, why would she be clear with you? Wouldn’t expect anything to come out of it if I were you.
/r/seduction19/03/22 07:03 PM
2

I feel like touching is when you start to tell the difference
/r/seduction03/03/22 01:14 AM
2

Look up “conversation threading”
/r/seduction19/02/22 12:07 AM
1

The answer is it depends. I would advise to calibrate first by doing smaller gestures first and gauging her reaction.
/r/seduction15/02/22 07:49 PM
10

Idk man that’s sticky. Like it could work, but at the same time I hate playing games like that. I had a girl recently say she wanted to be friends and I took her at her word but I could tell it pissed her off and that she only said it so I’d chase her. For a situation that would require good communication like yours, idk if I’d want to chance it with someone who would say no when they mean yes. If that is indeed what is happening. If it were me I’d just be like “ok fine we’re friends then” and t…
/r/seduction14/02/22 08:08 PM
1

Yeah well people are different and want different things. We all have to calibrate for what we want. I’m not really that much of an extrovert so if I’m going to leave my cave, I’d prefer it to be a known date, and just the two of us. Not even something fancy, just an environment where it’s us two. Could even be a cafe.
/r/seduction14/02/22 06:21 PM
1

Well you don’t want to be explicit like the wolf on loony toons with your young coming out of your mouth. I guess just eliminating doubt that it’s solely friendly. For example, if you ask them out to dinner, just you two, that’s harder to misinterpret than “come hang out at the bowling alley with my friends” you see? At the same time, it doesn’t necessarily mean she’s not interested if she brings a friend or whatever. Some people take a while to build up comfort.
/r/seduction14/02/22 05:31 PM
1

Im getting back into dating after a long hiatus and this kind of thing has been happening to me too. I think you have two options: 1) be more explicit about your intentions. It can be a fine line to toe. I’ve typically been indirect with my intentions because I figure they must realize I’m interested if I’m asking to hang out. But it’s not always the case. So instead, now I try to make it an intimidate setting, just us two. If they don’t want to, then I’m not interested. 2) Invest less and play …
/r/seduction14/02/22 05:26 PM
1

Yeah, I was under the impression it would just be us then she was like oh yeah come meet my motorcycle club lmao
/r/seduction11/02/22 03:05 PM
1

It can definitely happen. Was complicated in my case. We were friends for about three years, a few months ago we hooked up but it was technically cheating (I know I know), she has since broke up with dude and I live abroad now. Changed our dynamic but neither of us have regrets and I could see it becoming something more serious in the future
/r/seduction11/02/22 01:52 AM
5

Yeah I was feeling like that might be expected of me. I was hanging out with a motorcycle club which I know don’t have the same violent reputation as ones in the states, but not knowing either of them I was like hmmm. What if he’s psycho? You confirmed what I thought though so I appreciate your insight
/r/seduction11/02/22 01:28 AM
6

Yeah, I probably should have addressed it when it started. I considered it, but I usually just play it cool and unbothered and it works for me. Well, not this time haha
/r/seduction11/02/22 12:51 AM
86

Im sorry you took the time to write this, but you’re going to get downvoted to hell because there’s a convention on this subreddit that women can’t give good dating advice. That is solid advice though, put in a better way than I could have
/r/seduction09/02/22 03:26 AM
3

He probably wants a rebound I say go for it
/r/seduction08/02/22 02:13 PM
1

It’s pretty simple and tbh I feel like after COVID happened people don’t really make out like they used to anyway. The only time I consider a kiss bad is when their lips are super chapped or super slobbery or something like that. Don’t worry about it too much
/r/seduction06/02/22 06:55 AM
13

The only way to learn is by putting yourself out there, which you’re doing. You’ll learn, it’s trial and error
/r/seduction05/02/22 06:22 PM
3

God dude, you guys are bitter to the point of not wanting to better yourself. That’s sad.
/r/seduction31/01/22 03:27 PM
2

Yes people definitely do it
/r/seduction30/01/22 07:13 AM
3

Whenever I have moments like that I’m just honest. “To be honest I’m kinda of embarrassed of my apartment”. If she’s worth staying with she’ll probably just laugh and say it’s okay. I think most people find it attractive when you can be honest about an insecurity.
/r/seduction29/01/22 07:26 PM
7

Don’t immediately jump to the reason must be that your ugly. Nobody has a 100% success rate. Rejection will always be part of the equation. Just keep moving onward.
/r/seduction28/01/22 10:56 PM
5

What happens when you have 0 experience and go off the advice of other people with 0 experience Lmaooo
/r/seduction28/01/22 08:47 PM
3

Yeah it was 8 years ago, it’s okay to laugh yourself lol
/r/seduction28/01/22 07:53 PM
5

Yeah this was like maybe 8 years ago at this point. Not like I stay awake thinking about it every night. Just funny self cringe
/r/seduction28/01/22 05:17 PM
5

That’s a good way to put it. I just have this horribly shameful memory of messaging this girl on okcupid before a date something like “hey what if we just skipped the coffee and you come to my place 😉” Tbh it was probably even cringier than that. Needless to say she deleted me and I’ve bumped into her a handful of times through the years and we’ve always pretended to not know each other lmaooo
/r/seduction28/01/22 05:13 PM
6

Yeah I should clarify that I mean doing it too early on
/r/seduction28/01/22 05:09 PM
141

People need to remember that anyone can comment on here. It’s not like you have to present a certificate of competence lmao: That being said, I think the worst has been people who tell you to be overtly sexual. Sure it could work with the right person in the right context, but most of the time you’re just going to creep them out and get blocked
/r/seduction28/01/22 04:56 PM
1

Ok you’re right. Don’t bother anymore just roll over and accept it.
/r/seduction27/01/22 10:36 PM
3

Yeah dude at least 25+. Especially if you’re considering a relationship. Bumble I think is an older crowd typically you might try there. COVID definitely has made things weird
/r/seduction27/01/22 06:29 PM
1

We’re just trying to help you but you want to be miserable so carry on
/r/seduction27/01/22 02:28 PM
2

Most people just get drunk at the company holiday party and have a sloppy hook up lmao. Jokes aside, don’t be overt about it being a date. Ask in a way that gives plausible deniability that it was friendly. If you’ve been flirting and what not she’ll read between the lines. If she says no then cut it off and move on. My two cents.
/r/seduction26/01/22 03:20 AM
54

Maybe for whatever reason she feels more comfortable staying on tinder until she meets you
/r/seduction25/01/22 02:21 PM
1

Do a mix. Try to show a “depth of flavor” as a chef would say.
/r/seduction24/01/22 02:59 PM
1

Hmm I can’t attest to that because I’ve only lived in the global west. I lived in Hanoi, Vietnam for a couple months and felt very unattractive, nobody seemed interested in me whatsoever. Right now I’m in Mexico City and it has a huge hookup culture, which is awesome.
/r/seduction24/01/22 02:51 PM
4

Most men just lack confidence because they lack experience which creates a vicious cycle. Many men just spend their adolescence playing video games or generally being shut ins. That or they just hang with their guy friends who all are equally disinterested in women or putting themselves out there. After a while I think it just builds up and compacts itself. The more it’s neglected, the harder it becomes to push oneself. However, it’s easier to maintain than rebuild. Once you “get it” you’re pret…
/r/seduction24/01/22 02:13 AM
1

What kind of area do you live in? Small town? Suburb? City?
/r/seduction24/01/22 12:00 AM
5

Luckily I have multiple friends who are photographers so I use the nice professional pics they’ve taken of me. However in general just make sure you have a full body pic so they have an idea of your physique. Maybe one with friends, one engaging in a hobby. Just make it look like you have a life. Maybe don’t post shirtless mirror selfie or you posing with a fish you caught lol.
/r/seduction23/01/22 11:59 PM
6

Have good photos. State what you’re looking for in the bio maybe a couple interests. In my experience, it matters a lot where you use tinder. In certain locations it’s hardly worth it. In big cities, it’s absolutely amazing.
/r/seduction23/01/22 11:54 PM
1

In the times it’s worked for me, I usually comment something on their story (not the emoji reactions, those are tacky). Something innocuous but something that could invite a response. Example: she’s cooking something. “Damn that looks good, my eggs never turn out like that 😭”. If she’s interested she’ll probably respond with something. Just keep doing stuff like that here and there and while the iron is hot ask her if she wants to get coffee. That’s what I’d do
/r/seduction22/01/22 10:08 PM
3

Or just ask for the Instagram? I don’t get it lol
/r/seduction22/01/22 08:45 PM
10

It’s 2022 you can drink coffee any time of the day! But seriously, cafes are nice. They’re casual, cheaper, you can get something small to eat instead of something big, and you don’t have to get caffeine. Most cafes have juices or other options. It’s been my go to lately as I’ve been trying to drink less alcohol. And it lasts as long as you’re having fun. I usually will hang out there for a while talking, and then if the mood is right maybe leave and walk around, check out shops, go to another s…
/r/seduction22/01/22 03:47 PM
2

Pretty much. I work in food and I’ve known some fat chefs who have hot girlfriends. But again, it’s because they have passion and skills and life experience and personalities. If you spend all your time in your room and on the computer while your mom does your laundry and makes you food, yeah, sorry you don’t deserve an active sex life lol
/r/seduction19/01/22 06:15 PM
1

Lol seriously bro. I lost a lot of weight, but I was killing it when I was husky. I also knew other fat guys that were getting it. Like, as long as you got juice you’re good
/r/seduction19/01/22 05:51 PM
2

$100 for a year, and In like two days I have more matches than I even know what to do with. It’s worth it if you’re not broke. EDIT: and live in a city
/r/seduction18/01/22 11:32 PM
2

Works for me. I honestly am gonna have to slow down because I can’t juggle all the women I’m talking to lol
/r/seduction18/01/22 11:31 PM
1

True. I guess my intent is to reach the people who think in that binary and try to smash it. Open to critiques / suggestions.
/r/seduction18/01/22 09:12 PM
1

Get a decent haircut, wear clothes that fit. That alone will bring most guys up a couple notches. Exercise and diet if your extremely fat. But even husky guys can kill it. I mean ffs women are into “dad bods”. We don’t have it all that hard.
/r/seduction18/01/22 09:00 PM
1

There’s a lot of different elements. When I lived in Lake Tahoe, CA I never got a single date. But people there are outdoorsy and into snowboarding. I don’t like any of those things. I like stinky dirty cities. As soon as I left that place and got back to a city, I bough tinder gold and i have more matches than I even care to talk to.
/r/seduction18/01/22 08:56 PM
1

In a nutshell I suppose but I don’t even really care about money that much. I focus on having enough to not die or be broke, but I can assure you that nobody dates me for my money lol
/r/seduction18/01/22 08:54 PM
2

Have you seen how ugly Connor Mockasin is? And he’s like a sex symbol. You just gotta rock it and not whine and complain about every perceived injustice done to you.
/r/seduction18/01/22 08:53 PM
1

Please share your thoughts I don’t pretend to be the master of the universe
/r/seduction18/01/22 07:09 PM
3

Thanks for the honest feedback. Thinking this might be a worn out subject
/r/seduction18/01/22 02:33 PM
0

They can’t handle it. I love outspoken women, I love not having to guess what they’re thinking or feeling.
/r/seduction18/01/22 04:33 AM
2

I’ve never heard of that. Just throwing stuff at the wall to see what sticks.
/r/seduction18/01/22 04:03 AM
2

Your call man lol
/r/seduction17/01/22 08:38 PM
3

Damn that sucks man. I mean you two never talked about being exclusive and she said she didn’t want a relationship so nobody really did anything wrong. I always think it’s silly when people say they don’t want a relationship but yet they keep seeing the same person. Yeah maybe it’s not a “serious” relationship but it’s still a relationship lol. She probably just has to do some soul searching.
/r/seduction17/01/22 06:07 PM
21

Let her hit you up. I’d start making steps towards moving on if I were you. Not that you have to delete her from your brain, but back off a little. She’ll most likely come back around.
/r/seduction17/01/22 05:41 PM
13

Take the advice here with a grain of salt and listen to your therapist. You sound like you need professional help. Ram Dass is someone who really helped me in my dark days. His book “Be Here Now” is a classic. He’s spiritual and might be off putting at first if you aren’t into meditation or eastern religion, but just let it wash over you. (He has a lot of lectures on YouTube) It’s not all about dating and sex and validation. I recently went through a 6 month dry spell. It was due to circumstance…
/r/seduction17/01/22 04:11 PM
15

It’s okay to take some time to process. What I do is tell myself “okay just feel all your feelings right now” and I give myself like a day or two to be as ridiculous and sad as I want. But then it’s upward and onward. You don’t have to go right back into dating but keep telling yourself it’s okay. Its okay to feel what you feel, it’s okay it didn’t work out. The pain will still be there but it will fade more each day. I think letting yourself be sad a couple days in the beginning helps though. J…
/r/seduction17/01/22 03:46 AM
3

Look up “escalation” Im sure there are guides on here. Basically you start from small things and slowly ramp it up. Eye contact and flirting to lightly touching her hand or shoulder, to leaving your hand on her back a little longer, to putting your hand on her lower back, to kissing etc. you get the picture. Just gauge her reaction every time you touch her. If she isn’t in to it then slow your roll. Good luck
/r/seduction16/01/22 10:48 PM
2

Yes. You’ve made your desires known and she still wants to see you. She just wants to be sure because she has a strong idea of what she wants.
/r/seduction16/01/22 10:06 PM
4

Maybe staying out with her longer would have helped make a stronger impression? It happens to me too, I’ll be super into somebody in the moment and the next day I wake up and I’m just like eh. I’d honestly rather lay in bed and relax lol
/r/seduction16/01/22 05:56 PM
7

Don’t focus on that. It doesn’t matter as much. What matters way more is that you’re actually approaching and doing the work. People are gonna flake and fall off, it’s inevitable. I don’t do your type of game often and I’m older but maybe try getting her to follow you instead or getting the number instead. But that’s a minor detail in the face of you having the balls to approach so congrats dude.
/r/seduction16/01/22 05:46 PM
10

Thanks I just cringed myself into the 10th dimension
/r/seduction16/01/22 01:18 AM
1

Im confused about what you want. If you guys spooned though, highly doubtful she just sees it as friendly. Could be. But probably not.
/r/seduction15/01/22 05:49 PM
1

Sorry I forgot you said you want to take it further. Would you want to date her or just hook up? Since you’re in a friend group I think it might be better to be direct and talk about it.
/r/seduction15/01/22 05:37 PM
1

Mmm. You prefer to stay friends? If that’s what you prefer than there’s not a problem right?
/r/seduction15/01/22 05:29 PM
1

Hey man be happy. That’s still a nice experience. It’s not all about notches in your bedpost. Why do you think it isn’t possible to escalate?
/r/seduction15/01/22 05:22 PM
45

Report back, for science
/r/seduction15/01/22 01:11 AM
126

Just say it. It’s always awkward to say these things, but the chances of him not being down are pretty slim. So just be like “hey, do you want to mess around with me?” Something like that. I’m sure he’ll be having a heart attack but into it lol
/r/seduction15/01/22 12:40 AM
2

No problem. I think as long as you’re giving to give and not expecting anything in return, you’ll be good
/r/seduction13/01/22 11:22 PM
2

I think that’s funny and would be interpreted as such. As long as it’s not like a lot. Like an amount that seems expensive, because then like I was saying, it can be uncomfortable because you’re wondering what the other person wants in return.
/r/seduction13/01/22 11:08 PM
4

I think that’s a great gift and very thoughtful. I’d be super happy if someone did that to me.
/r/seduction13/01/22 11:02 PM
1

Just out of curiousity, what were the gifts you gave your coworker? And we’re you trying to flirt or just being nice?
/r/seduction13/01/22 10:45 PM
8

Look up the 5 love languages. Some people love gifts, others don’t. I actually hated getting gifts for quite a while, because to me it always felt like a bribe or somebody trying to buy your attention. I just hated the feeling of obligation to be grateful for something I didn’t ask for. Now however I like small gifts. I’ll buy a candy or something small at the store to show someone I was thinking about them.
/r/seduction13/01/22 10:35 PM
7

Just get back on the horse man, its rough sometimes but gotta keep pushing on.
/r/seduction13/01/22 05:07 AM
7

Years ago, I remember seeing an Owen video on this subject. He basically lifted his approach from the tenants of meditation and mindfulness. In a nutshell: The first step is to recognize when you’re having these thoughts. You need to cultivate an awareness of yourself and your thought process. You need to be able to notice “Oh shit, I’m obsessing”, or “oh wow I just caught myself talking myself down”. The second step is to “correct” the thought. Affirmations if you will. Say I catch myself think…
/r/seduction13/01/22 01:32 AM
1

Man I’m sorry, I know it hurts but it’s not worth it. You should focus on moving on. You two haven’t even talked in “ages”. Look up material on getting over oneitis and how to have an abundance mindset, not and scarcity mindset.
/r/seduction12/01/22 10:06 PM
6

I had a lot of luck in Chicago, if you don’t mind living there haha
/r/seduction12/01/22 09:25 PM
2

Yeah there’s levels. As long as they are working on it and open to talking through it I think it can be ok
/r/seduction12/01/22 08:34 PM
2

Yeah it’s just too messy with insecure people, too much unwarranted drama
/r/seduction12/01/22 06:57 PM
1

Good luck man, I’ve definitely been there with alcohol myself. Try, if you can, to just slow your roll a bit. Try to take smaller sips with longer pauses in between.
/r/seduction12/01/22 05:26 PM
1

Are you getting drunk because of nerves? Do you think you have a drinking problem? Setting a limit before you arrive to the bar can help. “Ok let’s just get two drinks and some food?” Then she agrees and you two are on the same page. Now you’ve also opened up a line of communication about how drunk you’re going to get. Stay on par with her. Say you both finish your two drinks, but you two are still having a good time. “Should we get one more?” Keep following this, checking in with her after ever…
/r/seduction12/01/22 05:11 PM
11

I think it’s pretty common. We’re not really presented realistic models of dating and love growing up. I think men suffer a lot because we’re not supposed to talk about our feelings or be emotionally intelligent, whereas women are, and they learn how to process their emotions at a young age.
/r/seduction12/01/22 05:05 PM
2

Yeah I’m dealing with that too rn. Sucks because she’s really dope but insecurity can really just mess everything up.
/r/seduction12/01/22 04:56 PM
13

Yeah when I was younger, like early 20s I was just jumping from one infatuation to the other. Seems so exhausting now to look back at.
/r/seduction12/01/22 07:05 AM
1

Feel free to take my comment with a grain of salt but I say forget it man. At least forget the idea of being with her. Unless you plan on moving to her town, how would that work out in a practical sense? If you reach out to her don’t do it with expectations. It doesn’t hurt to check in and keep in touch to keep that thread alive, but don’t get ahead of yourself. My two cents.
/r/seduction12/01/22 05:48 AM
11

Don’t you think it’ll be worse if you get caught lying about your name? Lol
/r/seduction12/01/22 01:31 AM
6

You need to realize when you’re overthinking and distract yourself, we are our own worst enemies when it comes to “oneitis” as it’s commonly calle here. I think one should be clear with their intent but grounded. Interested but not giddy. Forward but without expectations. You should know deep in the core of your being that you will be fine no matter what happens. I don’t hide my interest, I make it known, but I don’t overemphasize it or keep reminding them of it. If they are into it, cool let’s …
/r/seduction11/01/22 11:47 PM
2

Goals for the year, dream job, what they’d do if they won the lottery, best memory, best concert they’ve seen, what they wanted to be when they were a kid. Anything revolving around dreams and desires makes for stimulating conversation.
/r/seduction10/01/22 04:45 PM
8

People want what they can’t have. I think the opposite is true as well, ie some coworker is always flirting with you and then one day stops and gives attention to someone else. There’s a little part of you that’s like “hey wtf” lol
/r/seduction09/01/22 05:42 AM
4

Things you can control: diet, grooming, exercising, hygiene, posture, clothes etc. Focus on the things you can control, and for the things you can’t, come to peace with them. Try meditating, realize you’re an imperfect human like everyone else.
/r/seduction09/01/22 01:16 AM
3

I don’t think you should ever wait unless you know they’re going through some shit. I’m a proponent of communicating early and often
/r/seduction09/01/22 01:08 AM
3

Well then it sounds like you weren’t clear about your intent. It’s better to shoot your shot in a way that it can’t be misinterpreted and if she rejects you, you take it on the chin and at least feel good knowing you tried. If you ride the fence and aren’t clear you’re just going to confuse them and they’re not going to be on board because they don’t want to be rejected either.
/r/seduction09/01/22 01:03 AM
6

Stop stalling bruh, just ask her out. Don’t rack your brain trying to read between the lines, she gave you her number, hit her up.
/r/seduction09/01/22 12:56 AM
5

Mmm idk man, there’s a phrase “strike while the iron is hot”. Sounds like you let your chance pass by and things fizzled out. I’m confused by your post. Did you ask her to get a drink and she ignored that you ask?
/r/seduction09/01/22 12:54 AM
18

Give me your eggs foul beast. Idk man just say something dumb who cares
/r/seduction08/01/22 11:21 PM
2

Exactly, that’s where all growth starts, outside of the comfort zone. Like disassociate if you have to, just force yourself to say something and “watch” yourself from a third person perspective. I still feel awkward doing it but as long as you’re respectful most will respect your boldness.
/r/seduction08/01/22 11:01 PM
3

Don’t think about it as trying to be mysterious on purpose. Think about it as not showing all your cards at once. Like don’t tell your whole life story on the first few dates. Let her ask some questions and figure out things about you on her own. It’s give and take, people like the thrill of the chase. Don’t just hand yourself and everything about you over on a silver platter.
/r/seduction08/01/22 11:00 PM
18

The old advice is “agree and amplify” So if she talked about your hometown you laugh and take it up a notch “yeah it’s fucking shit hole”. Or just be unbothered, laugh, show you’re a good sport.
/r/seduction08/01/22 10:56 PM
1

Favorite food, worst date they’ve ever been on, what did they want to be when they were a kid, favorite movie? Random stuff like that
/r/seduction08/01/22 10:51 PM
1

You don’t have to be high intensity flirting all the time. Compliment is sufficient enough to gauge interest. The fact they’re still talking to you enthusiastically means they’re interested to some degree. Just say “I have to get going but we should hang out sometime. Maybe coffee or food or something” Get their info and then hit them up later to confirm their still down.
/r/seduction08/01/22 10:49 PM
1

It’s good to learn the “rules” when your starting out, but at a certain point you kinda we’ll forget them because there’s always exceptions to every “rule”. If you feel a certain way, why not go for it? Just manage expectations and don’t be afraid to fail.
/r/seduction08/01/22 10:46 PM
19

That’s incredibly far the from the truth. Everybody knows some bum ass dude that gets laid all the time. If you’re fun, funny, just generally a good time, you’ll do fine in most situations.
/r/seduction08/01/22 10:44 PM
2

I mean, you’re not starting from a bad place, you have people approaching you which is a good sign. There’s not really any trick to getting over that anxiety. You kind of just have to push through. It’s never going to feel like the right time or the right thing to say, just do it. If they’re into you it doesn’t matter much what you say.
/r/seduction08/01/22 10:43 PM
2

Everybody hooks up with a coworker at some point, just make sure they’re stable and it’s not gonna blow up in your face. Don’t get ahead of yourself though. Just strike up a conversation and feel her out first before you ask her out. Once you’re on talking terms, invite her to lunch with you or something
/r/seduction08/01/22 05:21 AM
8

That’s not a bad outcome dude. Sounds like she respected your boldness. Nobody has a 100% success rate
/r/seduction07/01/22 08:52 PM
1

Well what do you have to lose then? I think it’s better to have clarity then lay in wait.
/r/seduction07/01/22 05:22 AM
1

Talk specifically about expectations while you two are seeing each other. How would you feel if he hooked up with some one else? How would he feel if you did the same? Talk about these things so you can gauge where you’re at.
/r/seduction07/01/22 05:11 AM
3

This is all over the place, I don’t think either of you really know what you want. I mean you can both say you don’t want a relationship but that what you have, just not a seriously committed one. You really just gotta talk it out. “Hey I think we should clear the air and just talk about what’s happened over the last week or two”. Be sober and just be honest with how you feel and what you want. You’ll feel so much better rather than trying to play the guessing game.
/r/seduction07/01/22 05:05 AM
2

“Good things” in the right context and the right amount. Salt is good but dumping a cup of salt in a salad renders it inedible.
/r/seduction07/01/22 04:59 AM
2

I mean it’s not bad to be kind and be like “hang in there”. But to try to segue it into seduction is a no go.
/r/seduction07/01/22 04:49 AM
3

Just don’t, I’m seeing the train wreck here from a mile away
/r/seduction07/01/22 04:44 AM
1

Keep that energy but manage your expectations. I was a little let down when I went to college because I was expecting a sex fest and didn’t get laid once my first year there.
/r/seduction07/01/22 04:43 AM
1

This is a situation where you just have to talk it out
/r/seduction07/01/22 04:38 AM
1

Also tinder doesn’t show your profile to a lot of people if you’re using the free version. I usually put a quick blurb about my interests and what I’m looking for.
/r/seduction07/01/22 04:28 AM
2

Just find ways to work it into conversation. “Yeah I’m not really looking for something serious at the moment” like your saying it generally not specifically to her.
/r/seduction07/01/22 04:13 AM
6

Being confident and secure in myself regardless of life circumstances. Not beating myself up about every perceived failure. Being bold, communicating what I want.
/r/seduction07/01/22 04:11 AM
3

Idk I’m probably a bit older than you but I personally wouldn’t really hit her up unless it was to ask her out.
/r/seduction07/01/22 04:07 AM
6

I mean most people don’t like being rejected and are going to try to save face afterwards. You probably have too much of a poker face, you’re not showing how you feel / you’re too hard to read / you don’t even know how you feel.
/r/seduction07/01/22 04:04 AM
2

Lmao I mean I guess you could take it both ways but I meant there’ll always be another person to be interested in. Rejection is part of life, it gets easier, just manage your expectations. Don’t get ahead of yourself imagining your wedding and stuff before you ask them out
/r/seduction07/01/22 02:28 AM
3

Eh, you don’t have to go down that dark road with it. You’re learning, chill, it’s not that serious, it’s supposed to be fun
/r/seduction06/01/22 11:17 PM
3

How quickly I respond reflects on how into them I am. If I’m not that interested I may take all day to respond, if I’m into them, I might just reply instantly
/r/seduction06/01/22 09:08 PM
89

I mean personally I’d probably say fuck it and go for it. Worst you have to deal with is potential awkwardness later down the line. If you do go out with her don’t go for sex the first date, but check her for red flags just to make sure it won’t blow up in your face. If you still feel good about it proceed. My two cents, or what I would do
/r/seduction06/01/22 09:05 PM
1

I think that’s reasonable. Just make sure you talk about it soon, because even if you get back together you should cover all your bases and clear the air
/r/seduction06/01/22 09:03 PM
10

Mmm idk, I send texts or audio messages just because I don’t want to put people on the spot with a phone call and many people in this newer generation don’t like phone calls anyway
/r/seduction06/01/22 08:58 PM
49

Do you bump into her often? Are you going to live there for a while? Things to consider when assessing if it’s worth it or not.
/r/seduction06/01/22 08:57 PM
1

Yeah I’m not knocking you at all, Im just concerned that you two could be on different pages which could set either of you up for disappointment or confusion. Like it will hurt a lot more if you find out she still doesn’t want to get back with you after continuing to hang out with her, expecting that outcome. Not saying that’s what’s happening but giving you a hypothetical.
/r/seduction06/01/22 08:55 PM
1

At this point you gotta just talk about it. There’s no use in trying to suss out her intentions. It makes things needlessly complicated. Literally just say “I think we should talk about things” and address your concerns and how you actually feel about the situation. She will appreciate it and it will clear things up so much better than just wondering and asking Reddit
/r/seduction06/01/22 08:50 PM
2

What went down? If you want a general answer for a general question, give it a week or two. After a month you’ll be good as long as you aren’t letting yourself get hung up on it. Just remember, there’ll always be another one. Every time you think you’ll never feel that feeling again, you do. Take this time to focus on yourself. Projects your neglecting, your goals etc
/r/seduction06/01/22 08:44 PM
3

It’ll never feel like the right time and you’ll never have the right thing to say. So just do it.
/r/seduction06/01/22 08:33 PM
6

But OP wasn’t really treating it like a true friendship either. He was trying to “keep her in (his) radar”. Which isn’t really outcome independence imo. Me and my friend have talked about each others dating lives and such. It’s not always for attention. And even if it is, everybody wants attention in some form. I think OP failed to set up proper boundaries according to his wants and desires. He didn’t really want to be her friend, and it ended with him feeling resentment. Maybe there’s more to t…
/r/seduction06/01/22 08:18 PM
3

She shot her shot and you turned her down, now she’s saving face. Most people don’t have the patience to wait on you to make up your mind. Gotta be quicker on the draw.
/r/seduction06/01/22 05:53 PM
9

It depends, it depends, it depends. I met a girl some years ago and she said from the get go she just wanted to be friends. I was cool with it and didn’t push for anything else. Being friends with her was dope. She’s a chef and taught me all this cooking knowledge. She also plugged me into some interesting social circles. Etc. Well two years later I’m visiting her, I’m on tinder, not even thinking of her in any way besides platonic, and we end up hooking up super randomly. I never thought she fo…
/r/seduction06/01/22 05:49 PM
3

I mean, ideally, we’re never done improving ourselves. Do you feel ready for a commitment? I think as long as you are committed to yourself first, and getting better than why not? If youre in a state where you’re really insecure and putting relationships on a pedestal, trying to be saved by someone…then yeah, maybe take extra time to yourself before going out there.
/r/seduction06/01/22 05:39 PM
1

Do it or don’t
/r/seduction05/01/22 11:39 PM
1

Idk man San Fran is kinda cool but it’s expensiveness makes me never want to spend much time there
/r/seduction05/01/22 11:37 PM
2

Let them know from the get go you aren’t looking for anything serious. I always have that on my tinder profile. There’s no fool-proof way to stop people from catching feelings, but being straight forward with your intentions is a good start
/r/seduction05/01/22 07:50 PM
3

We all have our things we get shit for. Just learn to laugh about it and not take it that seriously
/r/seduction05/01/22 06:41 AM
2

Instagram isn’t a dating site. It’s like having a Facebook. You could of course potentially meet people off of Instagram but it’s not designed for that and not really recommended
/r/seduction05/01/22 02:38 AM
5

Personally I find the term “friend zone” to be kinda cringe, where does the boundary of friend stop and the boundary of sexual partner begin? It’s very subjective and varies person to person. I’ve had sex with people who were once “just friends” and I’ve become friends with people I once had sex with. Forget about it, everybody’s different, you just have to communicate. There’ll never be a “good time” to bring it up. Just say “hey, I want to tell you something”. If you get nervous just say “ok I…
/r/seduction05/01/22 01:37 AM
11

Yeah that’s one of the issues then. I’m sure there are kino guides you can look up but I think a good way to start out is by putting your hand on their shoulder and looking them in eyes when you say something. That or put your hand on their upper back, maybe give it a light rub like you’re consoling them. Also you can pay them gently on the back if you’re telling a joke. These are ways you can touch people that aren’t overtly sexual, but you will be able to gauge their reaction as to whether or …
/r/seduction04/01/22 11:34 PM
11

Do you touch them? I think touching can make the difference between being perceived as a friend vs a potential hookup.
/r/seduction04/01/22 11:18 PM
3

Or next time you see her just be ask her out in person
/r/seduction01/01/22 11:29 PM
1

Start trying to be more social in general, game men and women. Are you new in the area? Work into conversations that you’re new around town and are trying to meet new people.
/r/seduction01/01/22 11:27 PM
1

Just do it and get it over with. If she likes you there’s not really a wrong way to ask her out. Probably don’t do it through text though. Just tell her you want to ask her something if you can’t get her alone. Tap her on the shoulder “Hey I wanna ask you something later”. You can kinda gauge her reaction from that alone as to how she may respond. When you do have her off to the side or otherwise alone just ask. I have hella anxiety but I just let out a deep breath and say “Okay I’m just gonna s…
/r/seduction01/01/22 11:15 PM
1

It’s not ideal but I used to ask a mutual friend to ask for their number for me, or I’d find them on Instagram and just be honest like “hey I had fun with you last night but forgot to ask for your number. Would you be down to get coffee some time? If not I understand, have a good day!” Of course it’s better to do it in person, but these aren’t bad ways of going about it until you’re more confident. I still had success with those methods.
/r/seduction01/01/22 11:04 PM
1

I hate the double standard. I’ve also had uncomfortable experiences with sex but we’re just expected as men to always be down to have sex and to be walking dildos. I like your idea of the wrist slapping. I’ll have to try that. I’m always very vigilant about consent, and it’s not always reciprocated
/r/seduction01/01/22 11:00 PM
1

Hey it was nice meeting you last night, I was wondering if you’d be down to get a coffee or something this week
/r/seduction01/01/22 10:57 PM
12

I’m 30 and have never had a license due to epilepsy. I’ve spent a lot of time in cities with public transport and it’s never been a problem. Hell, I’ve dated people in more remote locations to and they didn’t mind driving me around. If you’re a fun time, and brighten peoples days, it will take you far.
/r/seduction01/01/22 10:45 PM
1

No because that’s not authentic either to try to be something you think women want. I’m sorry it’s hard to explain, I think it’s good to take breaks from dating, especially if it isn’t fun and is feeling like a slog. Maybe forget dating for now. Focus on interacting with people more in general, become detached from the outcome, want less from people. Focus on yourself, your passions, your goals etc. You can’t really fake true confidence which is why it can be so hard to teach. But you need to be…
/r/seduction01/01/22 10:35 PM
4

That’s called a frame and you can change your frame. Framing the situation like that will ensure that you radiate that energy. They’re probably thinking “This guys acting like he’s at a job interview, why doesn’t he just chill out and be natural?” If you’re desperate, the best you’ll do is someone else desperate or perhaps a pitty lay
/r/seduction01/01/22 10:26 PM
2

You need a healthy/constructive outlet to distract you from hyper focusing and obsessing over people. When you feel yourself going down the wormhole of fawning, interrupt it and say “focus on yourself”. You need to have your own life, goals, desires etc. With your current mindset you’ll be content to drop everything and bask in the glory of intimacy, only for it to inevitably come crashing down because you neglected yourself. There’s a song in Spanish that translates to “that’s not love, that’s …
/r/seduction01/01/22 08:08 PM
10

People are different. There’s also asexual people who will basically never have sex with you unless under perfect circumstances, there’s also people will have sex on the first date. There’s no one size fits all
/r/seduction01/01/22 06:52 PM
2

Just based off the title alone. Don’t do it man, save yourself being a part of that sloppy situation. Or don’t, but one day you’ll realize these things are never worth it
/r/seduction01/01/22 01:59 AM
10

Really solid advice, well written. Nice job!
/r/seduction01/01/22 01:55 AM
47

People are being a little harsh here. “Nice” is a semantically dubious word. It means different things to different people. Women definitely like kind, compassionate men. There are women who like toxic men too, but those women are toxic themselves, and why the hell would you want to be with them? I think the trope of the “nice guy” who doesn’t get laid is due to him being over invested too early on. You’re a puppy, you want to follow them around and be pet and fed affection. You’re sincere, inno…
/r/seduction31/12/21 10:34 PM
1

Just an observation that in both scenarios you are looking at dating success as a competition against other men. Not a healthy frame imo.
/r/seduction30/12/21 09:16 PM
9

Carry around a gallon of water. Once it gets late and everybody’s tripping out and dehydrated you’ll become the most popular person in the crowd. Learned from experience
/r/seduction30/12/21 08:16 PM
1

Lots of foreplay, learn how to eat pussy
/r/seduction30/12/21 08:15 PM
1

I think it depends where you’re at. If you’re a shut-in and never in the mood to go out, maybe you should force yourself. If you feel fulfilled already and don’t really desire to go out, maybe don’t then
/r/seduction29/12/21 08:07 PM
1

I mean on a first date I’m not going to talk about my most niche interests that requires background knowledge to understand. But over time of course these topics can come up
/r/seduction29/12/21 07:29 PM
1

This reminds me of some interview or short story by Bukowski. He basically said the reason he had so many romances was because he had time. That’s to say he was a bum with no job, but he was available for all the lonely women at home. Lol anyway no, don’t flake just because you think it’s a good “move”
/r/seduction29/12/21 04:17 AM
1

I think the passion is what’s sexy and with passion you can make most things sexy (cooking, painting, teaching, rock climbing, etc)
/r/seduction28/12/21 09:39 PM
1

I think it’s hard when you’re a shy, un confident person to start to putting yourself out there and what not. You’re uncalibrated and putting in a ton of energy and effort. You might not have success despite your efforts because it’s obvious how hard you’re trying. However, like other skills in life, with time and consistency, you’ll get better. Eventually it will all internalize. I hardly put in any effort at this point and still seeing options and open doors all the time. I’m on my purpose and…
/r/seduction28/12/21 09:25 PM
3

Pat them gently on the back while laughing after you make a joke. That’s a good first move to see their reaction and calibrate
/r/seduction28/12/21 06:56 PM
2

There are ways to rock being fat. I had more success with women when I was fat as compared to now, having lost weight and gained muscle. Don’t get me wrong, COVID definitely had a hand in that as well, but think of people like Seth Rogan and the popularity of the “dad bod”. If you can make her laugh and have a great time, you’ll do fine. As a fat guy you may do worse at clubs or more superficial environments, but still, you’re definitely not out of the game if you’re fat. Edit: I should clarify …
/r/seduction28/12/21 05:04 AM
2

You should do it! Sometimes hosts don’t have that high of minimum commitments ie. you could get a gig for only a week or two or three. I have a lot of anxiety too. In some ways traveling helps me because it keeps my anxiety occupied. There’s so much new stimuli, it can be a bit much at times but the thrill of adventure is one of my favorite highs in life.
/r/seduction27/12/21 11:09 AM
2

Of course feel free to hmu if you have any other questions
/r/seduction27/12/21 05:07 AM
4

I replied to the guy above you if you want to read it. I should also add that I just got my tefl which you can get for pretty cheap these days online. So I’ll probably start teaching English from my laptop soon so I don’t have to go back to the states every six months
/r/seduction27/12/21 01:37 AM
11

I do seasonal work. You can find such jobs on coolworks.com. I basically work 6 months out of the year and mostly travel Mexico and South America because it’s close and cheap. Some people just go job to job and don’t really travel in between. Seasonal workers are an interesting lot. Also before COVID I would do work exchanges like workaway (I forgot the exact url but google that and you’ll find it). Basically do reception in a hostel or chores around farm (random shit) for four hours a day in ex…
/r/seduction27/12/21 01:35 AM
52

I always dreamed of being a nomad but kept deferring that dream to finish my degree and do other things to make my parents and others happy. Well one day I finally got my degree and it was very underwhelming. It finally occurred to me that I could very well live my entire life for other people, and never do the things I’ve dreamed. So one day I bought a ticket out of my city and have more or less been moving around ever since (COVID obviously has complicated things but I still manage to be nomad…
/r/seduction26/12/21 03:42 PM
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