If you are a socially awkward man, or have boundary issues, you'll become a rapist apparently. Also, women are apparently unable to stand up for themselves

Proserpina · 2012-08-10T18:34:37+00:00

Women are totally able to stand up for themselves. The problem is that no one was listening. Not the creepy guy sexually harassing them, not their friends, not their boyfriends.

I have boundary issues. That doesn't mean I demand sex from girls for giving them a ride home, or that I try to follow them inside when they say "no". Stop apologizing for this behavior. Stop making r/mensrights look bad.

chavelah · 2012-08-09T20:57:28+00:00

All of that behavior is completely unacceptable, and everybody who posts here knows it. Socially awkward men don't caress the legs of unconscious partygoers. Socially awkward men don't hit on the teenage cousins of their friends at weddings. That's predation. But yes, the women themselves could and should seek redress in their own right.

Grapeban · 2012-08-09T23:38:19+00:00

What the article is saying that these men, whose actions are incredibly predatory and sexually threatening are A) not listening to criticism/getting defensive about it and B) being protected by their friends, who refuse to call them out. Why does this make them "proto-rapists"?

Well, because, especially in the second case, they're not many steps away from it. Caressing the unconscious? Following people home after they refuse sex? These are very, very sexually aggressive actions, and they show he has little respect for consent.

Then we get into the rape culture idea, and what it's saying here is that if these creeps raped someone, it would be defended. Since their current behaviour is being tolerated and defended by the people around them, there is no reason to believe that a rape would be treated any differently. The men in this have been receiving constant positive affirmation for their actions, or at least have learned that no-one will make a huge deal about it, which just encourages them.

Also, OP, your title is disgusting. These aren't "socially awkward men", socially awkward men don't caress unconscious women. And as for "women are apparently unable to stand up for themselves", I can't believe you're criticising the women here for not taking enough of a stand against the creeps, rather than criticising the creeps and the people defending them.

2012-08-09T23:57:58+00:00

OP, you should be ashamed of yourself. The guys in question in the article are fucking disgusting and you know it. Good job for trying to make /r/mensrights look like a bunch of sexual harassment apologists.

Leinadro · 2012-08-11T14:50:15+00:00

There is a huge difference between socially awkward and actively doing things to violate the space of others.

Arcadia_Lynch · 2012-08-14T15:20:55+00:00

Actually both letter writers tried to stand up for themselves, one was ignored completely by the creeper, the other was told to get over it by the guys friends.

These cases both have guys who go beyond the bounds of being socially awkward. They were using behavior that was threatening to more than just the letter writers.

Doing such things once or twice, or until confronted is one thing, but the men described continued with the actions long after they should have learned better.

EpicJ · 2012-08-09T20:01:29+00:00

Luckily women never ask men to expose themselves, unless they're wearing a kilt, then they are fair game to peak under and also ask if they have any underwear on, but it's OK to do because it always happens to women.

Seand0r · 2012-08-09T20:31:04+00:00

Props on making your cakeday post something meaningful, rather than kittens.

MaunaLoona · 2012-08-09T20:35:22+00:00

Possible Step 6: Creepy dude rapes someone. If he does, there’s a less than 50% chance that the woman will report it. Why?

Now, let’s move onto #323, Ben the Proto-Rapist.

Your boyfriend’s friend Ben is pretty much going to rape someone if he hasn’t already.

I would put the chances that he has already raped someone as high. Very high.

Yep, being unattractive and having anti-game makes you a rapist.

slaykingftw · 2012-08-09T20:45:42+00:00

god damn.....

Dolanduckaroo · 2012-08-10T00:58:02+00:00

Well some of the examples are actual creepy behavior. Not consensual groping is not cool. But I know that the word "creep" sometimes gets used when a girl is not attracted to the guy, regardless of his behavior.

ChaoticThing05 · 2022-05-31T12:29:47+00:00

He hit on taken girls and made them uncomfortable with certain jokes, how is this being "just socially awkward"??? Here I was thinking that someone mistreated a simply introverted guy and i was ready to feel sorry for him but in the very beginning we already find out this man deserves the creep title, why the hell would you defend him

Title	If you are a socially awkward man, or have boundary issues, you'll become a rapist apparently. Also, women are apparently unable to stand up for themselves
Author	Clauderoughly
Upvotes	0
Comments	28
Date	August 9, 2012 7:49 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/xyfaz/if_you_are_a_socially_awkward_man_or_have/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/if-you-are-a-socially-awkward-man-or-have-boundary.1016199 https://theredarchive.com/post/1016199

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