Will We Ever Let Girls Be Good Enough? | Psychology Today

nplant · 2012-06-19T14:59:40+00:00

Over the past 40 years, the women’s movement, Title IX, and other things have leveled the playing field for girls; however, many feel obligated to take advantage of every open door, rather than pick and choose what fits with them.

Ironically, the women's movement is also responsible for a lot of that pressure. Many feminists like to imply that there's something wrong with being a person who wants to stay at home with the kids.

AnthonyZarat · 2012-06-19T15:45:13+00:00

Boys kill themselves 8 times more often than girls, boys are far more likely to drop out of school, boys go to college far less often, boys are more likely to abuse alcohol and drugs, boys are more likely to have legal problems, and 1 in 5 boys is compelled to take personality killing drugs as a condition of attending school.

But clearly we need to lavish even more attention on girls, because they feel overwhelmed by all the opportunities and success that they have.

Feminist sexism simply has no limits.

2012-06-19T14:15:46+00:00

I just don't get it.

Do boys never experience these pressures?

Some of these pressures result in a more successful life, with more prestige and power, is that bad?

The parts about appearance, that's all stuff that guys pretty much learn to ignore, or only take care of to the point that it's important. The girls who are getting up 2 hours early before school to get dressed are only damning themselves to this treatment. The people who care about the difference in looks are not worth their time, and the people who are going to say anything about it are also other girls.

TracyMorganFreeman · 2012-06-19T18:16:01+00:00

“[Being] an amazing girl often doesn’t feel like enough these days when you’re competing with all the other amazing girls around the country who are applying to the same elite colleges that you have been encouraged to aspire to practically all your life.”

Competition?

Welcome to adulthood.

TracyMorganFreeman · 2012-06-19T13:28:06+00:00

I've never understood this crap about all the pressure on females. I've spent 21 years on this Earth living as a female in America. Yeah, I've always wanted to do well in school, look good, and fit in with my peers. Who the hell doesn't? This has never been an exclusively female problem. In fact, I hesitate to call it a problem. It's the human condition. Nobody ever told me I had to be perfect. I never felt like I had to be perfect. I have a happy life, a husband, a good job, and never once have I felt like a victim of society. I really really would like to find out where people are getting all of this "women are under so much pressure" bullshit. Perhaps if all the books and magazines aimed towards women didn't tell them they were being oppressed, they wouldn't feel so fucking oppressed.

2012-06-19T19:41:13+00:00

Why does society assume that females are faced with all the pressures? Everyone faces the pressures of trying to be perfect. Everyone is judged based on their looks.

Note: I will no longer be reading articles from Psychology Today (not that I ever did in the first place).

AvgGuy101 · 2012-06-19T16:29:26+00:00

As several others have mentioned, most of these issues are not unique to females. They are simply starting to face some of the same pressures that males have faced practically since the beginning of civilization.

As these young women age, I wonder if we will also begin to see them experience the same stress related health issues that men do. I have often wondered if the shorter life spans for men is directly related to the work stresses that we face.

InfallibleBiship · 2012-06-19T16:57:55+00:00

The author doesn't like that girls are often judged on their looks, but I'm a bit disappointed at the suggestion that girls should instead be judged on their abilities. How about judging people on what they bring to their family, friends, and society in general?

Boss_Monkey · 2012-06-19T13:40:29+00:00

Most of this isn't exclusive to women by any stretch of the imagination (and while not a zero sum, it makes it pointless to mention in a focus about the pressures on women if it affects everyone). This is something women will have to come to terms with, that men have been dealing with forever. If something advantageous can be obtained, most people expect you to bust your ass to get it or you're lazy, have no drive, and no future.

When women had few expectations but to be doted on and have kids, they didn't have to worry about achieving anything on their own if they didn't want. Now that they have to make their own way, it's suddenly a grave injustice to expect anything of them. This isn't society telling them they're not good enough. It's society expecting of them what it's expected of everyone else up to now (ie men (mostly)). It's the responsibility part of the right to pursue excellence. However, most of the time, no one tells you that it's not an option.

Ma99ie · 2012-06-19T16:30:08+00:00

Who is this "we" she's talking about?

skidude2000 · 2012-06-20T04:06:43+00:00

if you were to walk in a girl’s shoes for a day...

Ha. I lost it right there. Yeah, because I've never had to deal with stress. Nope. Not like I attended an academy for high school with very high demands and work load. Or that I held a job at the same time. It also isn't the case that I'm at the top of my class in college, maintaining a GPA of 3.9 overall, and participating in my schools Honor's Program. While also holding two jobs. Yeah....I have no idea what stress is like. Too bad I'm not a girl; then I'd understand.

Boss_Monkey · 2012-06-19T13:43:10+00:00

Sounds like anxiety caused by success.

Title	Will We Ever Let Girls Be Good Enough? \| Psychology Today
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	10
Comments	40
Date	June 19, 2012 1:23 PM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/v9wc7/will_we_ever_let_girls_be_good_enough_psychology/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/will-we-ever-let-girls-be-good-enough-psychology.1019470 https://theredarchive.com/post/1019470

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