Is anyone actually still afraid of being labeled as "gay"?

rantgrrl · 2011-05-29T05:31:28+00:00

Several feminists have tried to shame me into silence by either implying or downright stating I was gay. I think it's kinda funny. Liberal MRAs are far more accepting of gay men than feminists are.

FascistOrigami · 2011-05-29T10:57:28+00:00

Being able to have your needs for companionship and sex met with no women involved? Sounds awesome! My response to "you're gay" is "no such luck".

iongantas · 2011-05-29T06:16:27+00:00

I am gay. Mere acknowledgement of this fact is not fear-worthy, however, usually when someone is saying this to you, they are being pejorative. Since that can lead to violence, other unpleasantness or other difficulties, particularly if they are co-workers or other people you have to be around, this can raise some hackles, more because of the indicator of what is behind it than the naming itself. Also, I live in the south, so it can be more of an issue. Heterosexuals being called gay surely have a different experience and have more option to shrug it off.

BootleatherPasta · 2011-05-29T05:48:47+00:00

I hate being called gay. You kiss one guy, and suddenly all the girls think you're not interested.

imbecile · 2011-05-29T09:00:43+00:00

Being labelled something that's not true can be annoying. Sometimes very. Nothing more.

2011-05-29T06:24:07+00:00

I don't care who likes me or not, outside of my family.

Mesum · 2011-05-29T08:00:23+00:00

I'm not gay but I learned very early on that if you reverse the game on them, they got nothing. For example, one guy called me a cocksucker. I go " let me suck your dick RIGHT NOW! PULL YOUR DICK OUT" he didn't know what to do and his peers made so much fun of him, he never tried it. Another time, a guy called me a faggot and I just pulled down my pants (ass facing him) and went "is that a rash on my asshole?". Same happened to him but this time I walked out with a girl in his group at the bar.

guizzy · 2011-05-29T05:39:28+00:00

Most guys I know around my age have learned how to defuse that specific "fear" by exagerating it. Most of the time, when someone calls you gay, it's all in jest, and as with all good-natured ribbing, the best answer is not to get defensive but to go along with the joke.

I think in the US, where I assume you're from, it might be a little different, but here in Montreal we don't have as much hateful anti-gay religious right rethoric. I have met only one person who truly despised homosexuals, unsurprisingly he was a fundamentalist evangelical christian. Once he got into that subject (something absurd about Walt Disney trying to push a fag agenda through his movies), I made it very clear to him that I strongly disapproved with the way he was being judgemental and it ended at that.

Again, though, not the US. Gay bashing is really not tolerated here, as they are the tiny minority.

A_Pathological_Liar · 2011-05-29T10:41:54+00:00

Funny story.

Recently met up with a buddy of mine from high school. I told him that he looked like hell.

He told me I looked gay.

I said "Is that a problem?"

He stopped for a second, gave me a weird look, then said. "Nah, not really. I had no idea you were gay, man."

I then explained to him that I'm not gay, and married to a woman.

LtWhiskeyWiskers · 2011-05-30T02:07:41+00:00

Well for me it's a bit wacky, from about 5th grade until I graduated highschool I was called gay by a sizeable chunk of my class and school on a near daily basis. How one thinks a 5th grader is even old enough to make that call is beyond me. This in turn lead to people, insert females, to actually think I was gay. Quite frankly as a heterosexual male in your formative years this can be devastating. I'm a fuckin college graduate at this point and I still haven't gotten over it completely. I'm comfortable with my own sexuality, but due to never having a real chance to learn how to talk to girls I'm a Forever Alone. I've never had a girlfriend and trying to talk to a girl almost gives me a panic attack. At this point I have to drink to work up the nerve, but due to said alcohol I usually have a lot of trouble holding a conversation. That all said, I'm probably the biggest defender of gay people in my limited social circle and have no problem with a person being gay. I've been there, I know how cruel people can be if they think you are different. I wasn't gay and I pretty much lost any chance of having a healthy social outlook from the ridicule and torment I went threw. It's not a big deal to an adult, they can take it, but don't for a second think it can't ruin your life, or at least the first couple decades, if your too young to understand why suddenly your whole grade hates you.

2011-05-29T14:02:56+00:00

There's nothing wrong with being gay so it doesn't bother me if someone 'accuses' me of it.

What I have noticed is that when feminists get called out on their bullshit they immediately resort to some nasty bigotry. The words ‘fag’ and ‘queer’ are used liberally as are the standard ‘loser’, ‘can’t get a real woman’ and ‘virgin’.

This is the male equivalent of 'slut shaming' and proves what astounding bigots and hypocrites they are.

Celda · 2011-05-29T05:16:07+00:00

Nah, I joke around about being gay sometimes and stuff.

I would be pissed that someone is trying to clown on me but not about the nature of the insult.

ExpendableOne · 2011-05-29T15:18:34+00:00

It only bothers me if that label comes from or reaches women I like, am attracted to or just want to have sex with; which would generally hurt my chances far more than it would help. Other than that, I don't really care; though, I do get a bit frustrated with people, men and women, using homosexuality as a shamming tool and how homosexuality is often automatically associated with anything that differs from the this objectifying model of masculinity. There are a lot of people out there(women especially), however, that do treat non-stereotypical men a lot better when they assume or think that they are gay; which does bother me(it's heterophobia and misandry). Honestly, there are many times where I feel as though my life would be a lot easier if I was just gay/bisexual to begin with.

pedopopeonarope · 2011-05-29T23:08:50+00:00

One way to destroy your enemy is to call him or her names to degrade them. This comes from the the CIA'S book on psychological operations, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_warfare

Here is another way to control people, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2TxawThTXv0

Yet another way to Control Christians, http://www.newtotalitarians.com/index_files/NunsAndMidshipmen.htm

2011-05-31T08:08:31+00:00

Meh, I'm gay, so I can't really judge. But yeah, women have a misconception that guys are insecure with themselves, although sometimes we are, and try to abuse this fact. EXTREMELY hypocritical. I had the same problem with a girl in my class. She told me that I shouldn't be fighting for mens rights because I'm a 'beta male'. I told her she shouldn't be a feminist because she's literally slept with 72 guys.

pakmanishere · 2011-05-29T14:53:25+00:00

No, women's shaming tactics have no affect on me anymore as I know they are just projecting their own insecurity.

It's compliment because gays a popular and men are demonized.

pcarvious · 2011-05-30T00:45:25+00:00

Being gay is still slung at people like it's a slur. I've had it thrown at me a number of times, but most of the time people don't bother because I just cock an eyebrow and move on.

2011-05-30T02:50:29+00:00

When I was in Jr. High and highschool ,it happened a bit more and it bothered me some times (i lost a friend because people thought we were gay, or at least he thought that hes an ass now so I think it was for the best) as you get older it doesn't bother you as much.

I am sure at /r/mensrights you will get a lot of "nos" but if you talked to some kids you would get a different result.

ironicalsexism · 2011-05-30T05:16:35+00:00

Here's how I see it. I don't care if people call me gay, even though I am straight. I have gay friends. I don't see what the insult it, unless you're a homophobe.

Liverotto · 2011-05-29T13:03:15+00:00

Yes of course you degenerate hypocrite.

Especially for bisexuals and tranny fuckers.

Once you are labeled as gay or bi, you get instantly disfranchised from your right of pussy.

Because girls don't want anything to do sexually with someone that fuck other people in the ass, girls just need the smallest excuse to "ban" you, like the imaginary taste of shit on your dick.

Even if you are only a top and very masculine many other guys don't want to be seen with you because they are afraid other people will think they are the bottom.

Title	Is anyone actually still afraid of being labeled as "gay"?
Author	Chowley_1
Upvotes	15
Comments	36
Date	May 29, 2011 4:54 AM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/hmnpt/is_anyone_actually_still_afraid_of_being_labeled/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/is-anyone-actually-still-afraid-of-being-labeled.1039318 https://theredarchive.com/post/1039318

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