We constantly hear how women are treated badly, but you guys get the shit end of the stick a lot also... I'm sick of the battle of the sexes.

etherspirit · 2009-09-26T09:14:32+00:00

Thank you Courtney. There are a lot of angry posts here, but it's a nice and welcome change to hear from a lady who gets it.

CourtneyWoods · 2009-09-26T09:22:28+00:00

It helps to know there are women like you out there. There are so many battle axes out there these days that some guys get disillusioned to the point where they just throw in the towel on the hopes of ever having a healthy long term relationship with a woman.

reeksofhavoc · 2009-09-27T07:18:11+00:00

I completely agree. I believe that we're creating a battle based off an artificial premise: that men and women want the same things, think the same, and act the same. That's not true. If we accept that men and women are different, that both are treated poorly and suffer, it becomes clear that both sexes ought to work in tandem with one another, not against one another. Thank you to the OP

pahncrd · 2009-09-26T17:10:32+00:00

I also want the "battle" to end. The division between the sexes is all manufactured because when we work together we are happy, and if we are happy and don't have these distractions then we start to pay attention to other things... scary things that need immediate attention.

ignatiusloyola · 2009-09-26T19:28:19+00:00

Thank you.

nuuur32 · 2009-09-26T20:47:53+00:00

I think secretly girls see a good looking guy and then picture a second guy with them. Or if a second guy approaches the first already good looking guy, she'll get flustered. Is that what you mean by the societal standard of guys hooking up being gross being at odds with your internal world view (feelings)?

Feckless · 2009-09-28T09:55:00+00:00

Good one Courtney!

dcousineau · 2009-09-26T18:00:43+00:00

I believe that the portrayal of men as "ugly, aggressive, simple and stupid" not only does a disservice to men but also to women and I do not believe this thought process is representative of feminism, but is in fact in opposition to it. Let me explain...

Feminism calls on men to be responsible, compotent and complex and cannot function if they are not. It allows gender stereotypes to be broken allowing men to be a full dynamic human beings. If men are irresponsible, incompotent, unintellegent, bad parents etc...dosn't that renforce gender stereotypes that force women to pick up the slack?

I would encourage you to look into what true feminism is and you will find a consensus on these views and the view that pro-woman is NOT and CANNOT be anti-male.

Honztastic · 2009-09-26T19:29:04+00:00

Well done Miss Woods. Or Mrs., it's all good.

That's all we want, an acknowledgement that guys get treated unfairly, too. And if all this "equality" was actually striving for equality we would be a lot less pissed off and probably be on board.

reeksofhavoc · 2009-09-28T05:06:34+00:00

Here's the deal. There is no battle.

As you said the media is just playing the sexes against each other. It's classic conquer and divide.

Woman and men should not be competing with each other whatsoever. I treat a man a man, and I would expect to be treated like a woman.

Hopefully people will stand up to it. They'll be happy they did.

Mesca · 2009-09-30T00:24:56+00:00

Great perspective.

If anyone is in doubt about the cultural bias against men, read this article from another reddit post.

I don't think there is any short term solution to the problems we are facing right now in this regard, but a good first step is for each person to broaden their perspective of the other side. It is much harder to turn your eye or even to pursue or encourage an adversarial policy if you can see the common humanity of the "adversary".

For that reason it's important for people to acknowledge that men often get treated very badly, especially in adversarial situations where women are on the other side, as with custody battles in divorce cases. News stories that portray obviously hostile women lodging unfounded allegations against good men, and getting away with it, must not be dismissed as inventions of a kooky fringe group. These things happen, and they happen to good men.

At the same time it is important for everyone to recognize that women have lived with this for generations. Only a very short time ago - even in such "advanced" societies like the USA - women were chattel. In many non-western cultures it is still the case (burqas, honor killings, etc). In the 60s in the USA, our bright and shining example of liberty, women were nurses and secretaries, certainly not doctors or CEOs. (Just as, in 1955, people of color couln't drink out of the same water fountain as a white person. My god, how crazy that sounds now, but it wasn't so very long ago.) Even today in a business setting a woman will be overlooked reflexively, unintentionally, while a man will be given the benefit of the doubt.

Keeping in mind this perspective, we can have a truer understanding of the other side and not view everyone as hostile or part of the conspiracy that is "keeping us down", whichever gender we are. We can work ever towards consistency and equity in our dealings with people. We can discourage our friends from pursuing adversarial divorces, if they do get divorced. We can eliminate sexist jokes (either way) from our daily dialogue.

Mesca · 2009-09-26T18:19:51+00:00

I'm all for a "battle" of the sexes when its low-key and humorous and think everyone could use a little lite-humor when it comes to differences. However, not so much when it's bashing on either side. That's when it gets ugly.

I'm also a "fan" of the double-standard of men in the movies. Men who are actual tough-guys / heroes / a man's man to be idealized yet when those same men in real life are present they're called "pigs" or accused of a "testosterone overdose".

And people wonder where the glint of aggression and annoyance comes from... throws hands up in an WTF fashion

Edit: Clarity

todascuentas · 2009-09-26T07:38:05+00:00

Well said. Now get back in the kitchen.

Title	We constantly hear how women are treated badly, but you guys get the shit end of the stick a lot also... I'm sick of the battle of the sexes.
Author	CourtneyWoods
Upvotes	46
Comments	34
Date	September 26, 2009 6:20 AM UTC (16 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/9o8uk/we_constantly_hear_how_women_are_treated_badly/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/we-constantly-hear-how-women-are-treated-badly-but.1052687 https://theredarchive.com/post/1052687

Comments