Remind me if we’re ever supposed to initiate and plan dates?

pinksamosa · 2021-09-27T08:24:14+00:00

Honestly let him take the lead. My previous ex was ofcourse a NVM but he made his interest pretty clear early on. I didn’t have to do anything he was always making plans. I learnt from him that if the guy is genuinely interested he will make a proper effort to lock you down. Even shy guys won’t be scared to chase.

ASeaOfQuotes · 2021-09-27T05:58:42+00:00

Unless you two are in a committed, serious, and long term exclusive relationship you shouldn’t be making yourself overly available or planning dates for him.

That’s not to say you can’t express desires, like “There’s a new exhibit at the art museum, it looks so amazing! We should go sometime.” Or, “Dune comes out next month! Can’t wait to see it.” You’re showing him the door and he’s the one who should be making effort to open it. Him picking these things up is part of a larger vetting strategy.

Sweetlikecream · 2021-09-27T11:14:08+00:00

No planning or initiating dates if he isn't your boyfriend. At the courting stages a man is supposed to impress you and show that he wants you. How can he show that when he can't even initiate and plan a date ?

super_thinker_ · 2021-09-27T13:46:04+00:00

If he’s serious about you, then he’ll plan the next date. “I don’t chase, I attract. What belongs to me will simply find me.”

oscine23 · 2021-10-08T19:31:55+00:00

14 months in and the guy I’m seeing still takes the lead, and I love it. I’ll throw in a suggestion here and there, but I just started doing that, and sparingly, only recently. I think you should let him do it. He’s the one courting YOU.

Title	Remind me if we’re ever supposed to initiate and plan dates?
Author	Aloe_You_Vera_Much
Upvotes	50
Comments	7
Date	September 27, 2021 5:24 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askFDS
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/AskFDS/comments/pwail9/remind_me_if_were_ever_supposed_to_initiate_and/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askFDS/remind-me-if-were-ever-supposed-to-initiate-and.1074035 https://theredarchive.com/post/1074035

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