Using the terms “high/low value” to describe another person…..

Huge-Theme6774 · 2022-03-02T09:36:09+00:00

I just realized that I'm still doing this and that it's not a healthy mindset..

Temporary-Astronaut2 · 2022-03-02T03:08:28+00:00

Fully agree. Its very sad to me because the people who use these terms are not open to vulnerability or connection, just cold hard transactions. Might as well hire a contractual life partner instead of dating.

Agreeable-Fruit-5112 · 2022-03-02T22:11:12+00:00

I think it's horrible. It is exactly what I would expect from a hyper-competitive capitalist society that treats money as more important than life.

Q-9 · 2022-03-02T14:05:29+00:00

I hope that the people who uses those terms see me as low value so they won't interact with me.

And it is hate speech. Describing another as "less than" if they don't fit in tight mold especially when it's about what you are, rather than what you've done. Dehumanizing others and saying others are superior.

Not sure how far the low/high values go, or are those used only to the "sexual market".

Deidara-katsu · 2022-03-02T03:22:41+00:00

AntiVictimhood · 2022-03-02T20:35:30+00:00

Doubtful that this is hate speech. Hate speech (def): abusive or threatening speech or writing that expresses prejudice against a particular group, especially on the basis of race, religion, or sexual orientation. Calling someone low-value is mean, but it doesn't meet the criteria for hate speech in my opinion.

But I agree that it's a stupid term. My thinking on why is quite different though.

Something I've learned throughout my dating life is that what people perceive as "valuable" is going to differ. Yes, there are certain qualities that almost everyone desires (emotional stability, good health, intelligence etc.), but the way people rank these important qualities will differ.

My husband has traits that can definitely be framed as flaws, but I genuinely love these qualities and see them as 'valuable". I'd consider him 'high value" in my books because he possesses this set of traits that I subjectively value. Even his more controversial qualities are traits I value.

For example- he is very disagreeable, but I admire that quality because he is never pushed around, he stands up for what is right, and he is always open and honest even when it's hard. Additionally, he takes risk. The other week he quit his job and moved to a different office location because he was sick of tyrannical managers threatening him. He just called the GM and made it happen. I admire that he can take reasoned risks and is willing to enter a novel environment and abandon his sense of comfort at his old office to get away from shitty managers.

Additionally, one of my arguably good qualities is that I'm highly intelligent and painfully rational. I had an ex who hated these qualities! He was always complaining that I intellectualized everything, and he didn't feel emotionally validated because I thought much more rationally than he did. He hated that! So even though some people might value intelligence and rationality, others definitely do not.

And that is where my issue with "high/low value" men and women comes in. We will all value qualities differently based on our own preferences. While my ex hated my rational mind, it's something that my husband absolutely loves and values because he can be impulsive and fail to think things through.

So what one woman sees as a "high value man" might be a total annoyance and "low value man" to another woman.

My issue with RP is that they assert that there is a stable and consistent set of characteristics that make men and women high value. When in reality, every individual will value qualities differently based on their needs.

One of my best friends comes from extreme wealth, and her boyfriend is this average joe guy who earns an average income. To her, she sees him as high value because he's hilarious, caring, committed, thoughtful, and they're compatible. By RP standards, he'd probably be low value since he earns about 40k, he's under 6 ft, he has a receding hairline, he doesn't have a high status job etc. So the insistence that men and women's value is determined by this standard set of criteria is just a weird way to think.

Ithrewallofitaway · 2022-03-04T10:38:04+00:00

Well, it is part of human nature to desire someone desirable. I remember when I was an adolescent, drooling over celebrities and supermodels. Hypergamy is inherent to all living beings. This is not a pseudoscience. That is why there are mating rituals among animals and humans. I used to pursue that, and now, I realized why it could be dangerous to follow hypergamy, because there is a distinct level difference in experience. 60 year old men marrying 22 year old models is one of those things. In my opinion, the 60 year olds are selling themselves short by marrying someone so young, because of the difference in what can be provided. Sex may be important, but so is having worldly success for a sustained period of time. The 60 year old would have 38 years of experience, while the model may have had 0-4 years of experience. Those relationships are too slanted out of favor for those men because they lack something desperately.

Gaddammitkyle · 2022-03-07T06:03:54+00:00

I prefer HV/LV over the Marry/Fuck/Pass system or the 1-10 Ratings that get used a lot. Although HV/LV is way less honest than MFP or 1-10. People dont like them when they get the bad ratings but love these systems when it favors them.

Title	Using the terms “high/low value” to describe another person…..
Author	pyrotechnic-looter
Upvotes	12
Comments	13
Date	March 2, 2022 12:45 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/t4n841/using_the_terms_highlow_value_to_describe_another/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/using-the-terms-highlow-value-to-describe-another.1104594 https://theredarchive.com/post/1104594

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