Good morning gentleman. Happy Monday to all.

I'll begin with Friday night, since that's where it all started.

I play in a funk band, and before I had swallowed TRP, I used to all but beg girls to come out to shows, texting them to make sure they were coming and all that shit. This time, I didn't talk to ANYONE about it and actually had a few girl friends text me "aren't you playing tonight?" and I'd simply send them the time and location.

One of my really good friends from the Army (also a girl I want to fuck) texted me and the exchange went something like this (we'll call her Ashley):

Ashley: I heard you're playing tonight!

Me: Yep. [Venue] at 9:30

Ashley: Well I don't know if we can go or not yet.

Me: I don't care. We play at 9:30

Her: Ok we'll see you then!

I literally don't even care at this point. It's been a long day and I'm really just looking forward to being on stage and enjoying my music with my friends.

So she shows up with her roommate and they're both looking hot as fuck. I don't even look at her friend. Ashley's like "Vader this is my friend Sally". Sally is about 5' 6", no more than 120 lbs with blonde hair and blue eyes. Her ass looks like something out of Maxim. I look at her and just say "sup", then off to the show. The whole night this Sally bitch is watching me drum and she's like pointing at me, blowing me kisses, and I give her a little bit back.

After the show she's all over my shit. I'm trying to put away my drums and shit in the green room and all my friends come back there, these two girls, and three of my best friends (not in my band). I grab two beers out of our cooler and hand them to my bros and we're laughing about shit while the girls are standing there, eyes wide. "Everyone gets us drinks, why aren't we drinking for free?", you could see it in their eyes guys. It was amazing.

So Sally walks up to me with her hands around my waist and kisses my neck. She says "baby you should buy me a drink" and I peel her off of me, point to my friend and say "I bet he'd buy you a drink" and we all laugh. She starts pouting so I finish her off "also, what the fuck are you guys doing in my green room? No bitches allowed." So puts on this fake pouting face and skulks off. My buddies are doubled over with laughter.

I can finally put my shit back. Fuck.

So I'm all done so I grab my beer and head back out to the floor to watch the next band rock out. This bitch is on me like white on rice on top of a paper plate with a glass of milk. We're making out hard, I'm rubbing her ass, it's fucking rad. Keep in mind the two things I've actually said to this girl was

  1. that I'm not going to buy her a drink and

  2. that she needs to leave me the fuck alone

It seemed like the worse I was to her, the more she wanted it.

Long story short, we go home, smoke a little, and have some 7/10 sex. It wasn't mindblowing (I was exhausted and high) but pretty rad. I got up early and made breakfast because I'm a good host as fuck and my roommate bought eggs the night before. My friend Ashley ended up staying in my roommate's bedroom but they didn't fuck, so I felt bad for him.

In short, it works gentlemen. I set out Friday looking to have a great show with my best friends and just enjoy my time and I ended up hitting an 9/10 just because I was a huge asshole to her.