After much abuse by women, how do you not fall into outright misogyny ?

ggleblanc2 · 2023-01-26T22:27:41+00:00

I'm sorry that you've suffered so much trauma.

It's easy to focus on the negative and forget all the positive interactions we have with others.

Try to find at least one male friend that you can hang out with who can be honest with you and call you out when needed.

IceCorrect · 2023-01-26T23:15:32+00:00

I've gone to several female therapists

Maybe look for male one

Nice-Neighborhood730 · 2023-01-26T22:36:58+00:00

I am sorry for your pain, and no one deserves to be treated this way. I understand how you feel. I have had it from the guys in my life. But I believe all women are not like that. I am a woman. Please don't let the bitterness eat you up because then you will fall into that trap. Allow yourself time to heal. I know it's hard. I dealt with 3 boys. One had a crush, and they ganged up on me and kicked me in the head. I was sexually assaulted 2xs and had lots of sexually harassment. I was a little girl who loved my male cousins, so that's proof I love the guys back then. I was my male cousins little lady.

OppositeBeautiful601 · 2023-01-26T22:44:30+00:00

I'm sorry you've experienced such abuse. There are good and bad women and good and bad men. I hope you find peace.

NibblyPig · 2023-01-27T00:33:06+00:00

I understand they do that because they know they can get police and everyone else on their side, but still, if you antagonize and harass someone, that person might do serious damage to you before any help arrives.

dw87190 · 2023-01-27T05:22:10+00:00

Because when we're boys we're constantly told we'd be wrong for hating our abusers

reverbiscrap · 2023-01-27T02:52:44+00:00

My honest advice to you?

Get your goddamn passport and escape the matrix. #SYSBM

TheMorningJoe · 2023-01-27T06:42:55+00:00

I always find it funny how when a dude becomes misogynistic everyone always pulls the “not all women” card yet never bat an eye when a women does the same shit and she’s stunning and brave. It’s a depressing double standard to say the least, not saying we should excuse turning misogynistic I’m just pointing out the double standard.

a-man-from-earth · 2023-01-27T03:33:17+00:00

Not All Women Are Like That.

Those were individuals who treated you badly. Just because someone shares the same type of genitals doesn't say anything about their moral character.

Mental_Inevitable · 2023-01-27T03:31:40+00:00

I understand..... been a victim to.... I think that's what lead me to kink and getting my way

ElisaSKy · 2023-01-27T03:54:58+00:00

I remember that there are some women openly speaking out about government sanctioned abuse like Allison, Hannah and Karen.

Nihi1986 · 2023-01-27T04:49:00+00:00

I'm very sorry for all what you have had to endure.

Personally, I've seen my life, health included, ruined by women. It sadly and shockingly includes physical abuse which happened only once but I didn't even know how to react.

Anyway, what I do is thinking about all those women who treated me decently and are genuinely decent people. Even if you have been unlucky, I'm sure there are some who treated you ok. We can't generalize because that's like when women hate on ALL men for what some men did to them.

LettuceBeGrateful · 2023-01-27T07:03:41+00:00

I just do my best to remind myself that the abusive women in my life were hurtful because they were abusive. That's the only word in that sentence that matters. I'd hate for someone to assume I'm an abuser merely for being a man, and I'm determined to treat everyone - women included - with the same humanity that I ask for from them.

I had a big problem with boundaries earlier in my life, but once I gained a sense of self-worth and was able to quickly boot the bad women from my life, I found myself surrounded by wonderful women who have turned into fantastic friends.

If you're still processing all the abuse you've taken from women, then your feelings make sense, but it's your responsibility to process that anger in a productive way, instead of taking it out on an entire group of people.

nineteenletterslong_ · 2023-01-27T00:56:00+00:00

the way i do it is an extreme version of the philosophy of being the bigger man: i don't see women as moral agents. just a force of nature.

technically it makes no sense because they're people and adults at that and therefore they should be held accountable for their actions but when they aren't i think the only way to stay sane is to pretend they're like a natural disaster or a wild animal, possibly to be avoided but never to be argued with or feel resentment toward.

yes, i know i'm already insane. thank you in advance for letting me know.

pappo4ever · 2023-01-27T03:54:17+00:00

I'm quite a mysogynist myself but you have to see women as victims too. As much as men are considered incels, women are alone too and also suffer, they are not enjoying life and sipping martinis, they are alone at home filled with anti-depressives and dying old alone with a herd of cats. Women are not ok, nor are men. The only way for them to be happy is together with men, and something, or someone, brainwashed them into hating and fear us. And everybody is suffering for it.

FutbolIntellect · 2023-01-27T06:18:17+00:00

Your bad experience with multiple bad women doesn't mean every women is like that. I'm not your average woke redditor who's here to call you sexist, racist, homophobic on every opportunity and I know how overused words like misogynist and incel are in Reddit but logically it makes no sense to hate women or men under any circumstances.

There are just shitty people. And yes There are countries where misogyny is present like Afghanistan, Iran etc but there are also countries like USA, Canada, New Zealand where there's outright misandry, which is done quite openly.

Nice-Neighborhood730 · 2023-01-27T05:44:50+00:00

I have to wonder if any of these women were abused by their father 's. I think someone should go undercover and find out if these women were abused. They need to get anger management!

I know women can be horrible because girls acted stupid back in the late 1970s. They would get into fights with other girls. I was bullied by girls in high school.

This one girl she liked this guy I danced with. I overheard her have a crush on him. I asked him about her and said, "Are you aware she likes you? He looked at her and said he wasn't interested in her.

She got two other girls to pick on me because she got possessive over a guy who wasn't interested in her. It's horrible the way teenage girls are becoming like in North America. They act territorial over a fellow, but he's not interested.

I was on Yahoo answers on these girls in the relationship area they liked this guy and were asking for advice. I said straight up you don't own him. I said first you have to see if he's even interested in you.""I can't stand it when girls act like they own a male because hes hunky desirable.

I can't get crazy over someone unless I am with him. Fantasies over someone I can't see in front of me is pretend and make believe. Girls can grow up to be psychopathic. I feel badly for males to become objects too by the girls

Nice-Neighborhood730 · 2023-01-27T06:08:12+00:00

You know what OP can you get someone to record these women if you experience this. I think you should because these women should be charged with harassment. You should find out because this is sad.

I was harassed at a restaurant by a guy who gave me a hard time about being picky, and then this loud mouthed woman starts up at me, saying they don't have to take crap from me. I was a little frustrated. I wasn't even loud with that girl. She started laughing as the woman was abusive. I complained about this and I was told that I should tell so they could ban them.

I had a back woman manager who at first was nice with me, then I had to use the bath room so bad I couldn't hold it, plus it wasn't clean to begin with. The toilet was plugged up. So I got falsely accused of making the mess. Well, they have had a change of so many times it isn't like it's happened once.

You can not walk into any establishment without someone going to loony toon bulistic. These days are becoming darker and darker. People hardly care anymore. When I worked in a restaurant with the men, I felt safe. Seriously, they knew what they were doing.

I prefer working under a male and then a female any day as long as he can .take charge and be the man. Now you know why I don't like working with women. The males know how to handle things better. There's only been a few women i liked working with. Men are better in charge.

I am speaking from personal experiences working in both. Women I worked with in cosmetics are caddy nail crawling creatures. The ones I knew. Some were okay, but the competitive woman. They were vicious on me. I got barred from working on cosmetics. Don't want to work their again. I only had one boss who was nothing like those other women. When I see the nails these girls wear, I think of guys mite need to hide or duck.

toblotron · 2023-01-27T06:14:17+00:00

I think you've had some bad luck there. I think it's important to recognize that men can be just as bad, and probably are, to the same degree (statistically)

I've had the "luck" of having been treated like absolute shit by men as well, so I guess that helps me to avoid outright misogyny.. and then I also think about the absolutely lovely men And women I've also interacted with, and that helps me avoid (most of the) misanthropy

Izalias · 2023-01-27T07:33:18+00:00

Let me just take a step back and discuss, from a mental architecture and software developer standpoint, why it is easy to start hating a people as a group and the tiny speck of knowledge you need to prevent this.

In both sociology and software engineering, there is a construct called a class. A class is a container that has defined parameters that identify it as a class and into which you can place behaviours or characteristics that are affected by or describe the class or even further defines the class.

Car for example may have two defining SETS of characteristics.

Identifiers for the Car
1. Wheels
2. Seats
3. Engine
4. Lights
5. Chassis
6. Frame
Behaviours of a car
1. Goes Vroom
2. Moves fast
3. Goes beep

The reason why classes are important, is it allows you to apply attributes to the class instead of having to apply every attribute each individual element that MAY come under the class.

In this way, you can save memory and processing power by; instead of keeping track of each individual instance of behaviour, which can be memory intensive and repetitive, you can simply apply that behaviour to the class and save a tonne of processing power and memory.
Individuals Table

ID	Object	Class	Behaviour
1	1	Car	Goes Vroom
2	1	Car	Moves Fast
3	1	Car	Goes Beep
4	2	Car	Goes Vroom
5	2	Car	Goes Beep
6	2	Car	Moves Fast
7	3	Car	Goes Vroom
8	3	Car	Goes Beep
9	3	Car	Moves Fast
10	4	Car	Goes Vroom
11	4	Car	Goes Beep
12	4	Car	Moves Fast

We can immediately see that the class is repeating a lot, so we can do something called, normalisation to remove the repetition and table space.

ObjectTable

Object	Class
1	Car
2	Car
3	Car
4	Car

ClassTable

ClassID	Class	Descriptor	Description
1	Car	Behaviour	Goes Vroom
2	Car	Behaviour	Goes Beep
3	Car	Behaviour	Moves Fast

Now we have reduced the data by a considerable number of records and that difference will scale in terms of space saving... this is a basic form of "data normalisation". It saves space and processing power, it is great for internal memory structures, like a computer or your brain.

Here is the risk...

ClassTable

ID	Class	Descriptor	Description
1	Car	Behaviour	Goes Vroom
2	Car	Behaviour	Goes Beep
3	Car	Behaviour	Moves Fast
4	Car	Opinion	Disgusting and needs destroying

We just applied an opinion to a class, and now, EVERYBODY that has been tagged with the class has been affected.

But what if we want to exempt people from ID 4, and that abhorrent opinion?

Instead of keeping track of all the individual wrongs that each individual does and holding that against them individually... the usefulness of the class has been invoked and now, in order to exempt people from that one Opinion on ID 4 we have to create an exceptions table.

ClassExceptions

ID	Object	Class
1	1	4
2	2	4
3	3	3
4	3	4
5	4	1

Anything linked in the exceptions table, removes the class element from the object... THESE MUST BE ADDED MANUALLY, and can only be identified by proof. The issue with that... it is unreasonable to prove a negative. We're proving exceptions here... which means we've identified a fundamental flaw with class logic. It requires the class constructor to prove a negative, and it is built into the class structure.

"All cars Move Fast except for 3, 3 is slow as all shit."

The issue with this, is the exceptions list CAN become LARGER than the original list, if the class construct has an attribute that in actuality, poorly defines the class or is inapplicable to a large proportion of the class. Worse still, you need to prove those instances in order to place those exceptions, and how many cars are you going to test before you redefine the class as a whole.

Now, with computers, dismissing a bad class construct is easy, you just delete the records. The human mind on the other hand... doesn't have a delete function.

It is extremely difficult to forget elements of a class once they have been established, and every time a neuron is fired, it reinforces its bridges.

Classes, are dangerous when it comes to corruption, both in terms of corrupting opinions or just actual damage.

When somebody is constructing a class "Beta Male" you should IMMEDIATELY understand what they are trying to do... They are trying to put you into an impossible position, trying to prove a negative on all members of the class in order to invalidate their classist logic.

They are also trying to apply behaviours and opinions to the class, those behaviours may be well defined, and the opinions may be robustly thought through, but that doesn't mean that they are applicable to a large proportion of the class.

Title	After much abuse by women, how do you not fall into outright misogyny ?
Author	AdInteresting2304
Upvotes	36
Comments	51
Date	January 26, 2023 7:48 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/10m0ns8/after_much_abuse_by_women_how_do_you_not_fall/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/after-much-abuse-by-women-how-do-you-not-fall-into.1150130 https://theredarchive.com/post/1150130

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