I have a friend who is just unwilling to better herself. She's content with being lazy and talks down about herself all the time. Whenever I'm doing something healthy she's the little devil on my shoulder that tells me to "give yourself a break" because she has no willpower herself. She does not see value in doing things that take effort because it's "too hard". It's made me realise that I find this behavior disgusting/annoying and I'm annoyed with her. I'm not disgusted with her, I'm disgusted that she just doesn't want to try because effort=pain. I don't want to stop being friends. Her actions only make me realise how I was like that years ago and make me try harder to better myself to not return to that. We've been through a lot and genuine friends are hard to find. It's her self confidence that's the problem and you really can't help people who are content to take the easier, lazy road. Her behavior does not affect me, it just infuriates me that she isn't willing to change, yet wants to complain about it.

Every time I try to encourage her to stop being so passive in her life, or actually take action if she wants what she comains about to change, she complains how it's too hard and how she now is fine or good enough (letting people walk all over her, she is weak willed and cannot finish anything she starts, quits jobs when it gets "hard" after 2 months then complains about no money, changes her mind when someone else suggests an idea instead of finding a mutual decision). I watched a video saying how if you are overweight or struggling with money, it's your responsibility to improve. She said "so relatable" then turned the volume up on her phone to block it out. There was one time when I talked on group video chat about how I love the salads I've been eating and how to make them tasty and she left the call. I had to message her to come back. I'm just tired of her not wanting to put effort into things because it's too hard.

Does anyone have experience with this?

Edit:

Some people think I am rude or pushing my beliefs onto my friend. I'd just like to clarify that I am silent on any criticism to her and have never mentioned it. I only encourage her when she speaks positively about herself and remain silent if she makes negative comments about herself. That's my only reaction.

Thanks for the replies. FDS isn't for everyone. Some of us are jaded by those who hurt us and I don't want to be that way so I limit what I take in. It just frustrates me to see her potential and she doesn't want to use it. I know everyone blooms in their own time but I just feel sometimes we have to take responsibility for our own struggles and actively try to overcome not just give in, if we want change.

I'm her friend. I'm not trying to judge but I just wish she would try sometimes because we've both had mothers that screwed us up and I've come to terms with mine. But some people just don't want to struggle for improvement but I believe the first step is the hardest which she refuses to take at least for now.