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[–]Thin_Protection5616 55 points56 points57 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Start dating multiple women at once or getting involved in something else that keeps you busy.
That way, you'll have less time and reason to be clingy with just one girl.
You'll also have the added bonus of multiplying the amount of experience you have with women.
[–]More-Cat-9226 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Great comment^
Take note boys
[–]willgo-waggins 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This here is good stuff.
I’ll add that you do not have to nor should you be responding right away. Not always. Some things are time sensitive (Hey are you going to pick me up at six - and it’s 4:30). But any type of regular communication does not necessarily garner an instant or rapid response.
I don’t totally agree with NOT communicating at all by text or phone beyond plans the way a lot of guys here think. I believe that there is absolutely - especially in the fast moving digital based world today - an out of sight out of mind/shiny new thing syndrome that must be accounted for. I feel that this is often the source of a lot of ghosting that fits here constantly bitch about.
Basically there is a fine line that you have to find between seeming needy/over and like you have no fucking life outside of girl if the moment, and IDGAF and having her just give up because of that attitude.
It’s on you to find that sweet spot with each individual you are interacting with and that is why you must interact and gain information in as much as you can when you are with her in person.
[–]Thin_Protection5616 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Good additions. Agree 100%
[–]I-Ate-The-Bones 4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This
[–]JearBear_3 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This right here is such an underrated comment, keeping busy and having a rotation or girls or an overall abundance mindset will work wonders..
[–]Suspicious-Sea-7362 13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Why do you think it's your texts and not your dates?
A girl could be laughing, smiling, having a good time and still feel NOTHING for you. I am getting the vibe that you are just a friend to them. Are you kissing or taking these girls home on your date? If not, then that's your problem.
[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points-2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Good advice but return of the kings, don’t text back after the date AT ALL. let them text you trust me you’re gonna stand out
[–]willgo-waggins 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
This is totally individually dependent.
You can completely blow your good opportunity if you do this with the wrong girl.
My current girl started out as the same terrible texter/communicator with me that she is with most people. She basically doesn’t even bother unless you hit her first for ANYONE that isn’t in her close circle. She’s also not a social media person. A lot of this comes from the fact that her job all day is communications dependent and it gets tiring and she needs to break from it in her own time.
So if I had not initiated contact pretty much immediately after we first met? Likely she would never have come out with me the next week and I would not have ever seen her again.
Instead here we are just fine and communication is fine as well - almost eight months later.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I don’t have opportunities I create them. I understand what you’re trying to say shit I’ve done it like that too. But honestly if you’re such a awesome person why would you have to initiate everything with her? To score some ass? To get a relationship is even worse, you had to wiggle your way into her inner circle is what I’m getting from your response. It works but nah idc if things would be good with a female if I persisted. I’m done doing that, I just hold myself in high respect to not do that. Obviously you will miss opportunities if you don’t Persist but honestly I’m so indifferent now. I give women one chance and that’s it times have changed women don’t want to be courted anymore.
[–]willgo-waggins 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
Well we all have our thing.
For me with this particular woman it was something different. And I don’t know how old you are, but I’m 51. I’ve been married three times. Lived with several women and had hundreds of casual encounters throughout my life so my range of experience is as broad as you can possibly imagine and my manner of handling things as well. I’ve had plenty of times where I used your approach because I didn’t care and had many more on the string to move into that spot.
But here’s the rub.
I have had three times in my life where I truly had an experience of an instant bonding and emotional connection with another person.
The first was in college when I first met my college girlfriend. She walked into the room and that was it for me at the time. Not pedestal or any of that bullshit. Just I have to know this woman. It only lasted three years but we have looked in on each other from time to time throughout life.
The second was when I met my second wife. I was standing in a line for a comedians live appearance in Seattle. She came along with a girlfriend and we locked eyes and she faked knowing me to cut into line. We spent the next ten years together and had two children. Sadly she drank herself to death. A problem she was never able to quite overcome.
The last time was that night back in September with my current girl. And I’m old enough now to know that something so rare and special needs to be given it’s fair chance to grow and develop by whatever means necessary.
And you can call it putting a woman on a pedestal or whatever. She does that to me as well so I guess we are both suckers for each other then right?
Ultimately this whole seduction “game” isn’t just about how to get laid. That’s easy. So is being shallow and putting notches on your bedpost. Trust me, I have more than I can count and wouldn’t miss 90% of them because I mostly cannot even remember their names or never got them.
But then there is the other side of learning how to seduce the woman that you really want to be with. And a lot of guys and girls that come here really just want to know that. Not how to be a hookup pro or be able to brag about how many girls or guys you’ve had. Believe me when I say that in the end it’s really meaningless beyond just experiences and the ones that count are actually ones that were more like a short term affair and emotional than the casual lay out of a bar or some day game pickup.
But the most important are the ones that really count and have that always potential that we all hope to luck into. And that’s why you learn the arts of seduction. The rest is fluff and entertainment.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Things have changed, women have changed men have changed. You said it’s easy to get laid? It is not for young men anymore, read the studies 1 in 3 young men report no sex in the last year (pre-pandemic). No sex also means no intimacy, you’re older you have a different perception of time and our society. You make some valid points I will admit but the scope of the situation is majority of women nowadays do remember I said majority do not appreciate a masculine man anymore. Masculinity is being disintegrated as we speak and women are being more masculine as a result. Feminine women are being taught to be more masculine so they’re stuck in a rut. Im a young man I see my society and I don’t complain I simply adapt. Now that’s not to say there aren’t good women out there they definitely are but it’s a new era love is in the air but not where I choose to breathe
[–]Delicious_Ad_1853 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Excellent point. Make sure you're escalating kino, op.
[–]nevertextgoodnight 10 points11 points12 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
The phone is for setting dates
Maybe once you get a little more experience you can get a sexual response (meaning she texted you first) in there to build tension for the next date
There's a lot to cover. But the first thing to do is stop texting girls after your dates. Let them reach out and if you don't hear from them, contact them in a week to set another date
Start there
[–]betterskins 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Don’t over text and don’t care. Don’t have any expectations of the girl being the “one” until she proves otherwise. Know you’ll be okay without a chick. Find a purpose
[–]willgo-waggins 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This.
Love yourself first. Be ok with yourself first. Be happy with yourself first.
Prior project when these things are not the case and it becomes a sense of being desperate, needy and clingy that puts most people off.
[–]vardarac 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Unless I know the girl well I have a two sentence rule. I try my best to keep my shit as concise and low effort as possible
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You need to learn how to chill. Don’t respond the minute you get a text. Wait an hour. Don’t act desperate. Women can smell desperation and it’s a turnoff. Act like you have hobbies and interests even if you don’t. Stop making your world revolve around a woman.
You can seem less clingy by being less clingy. You really need to do some work on yourself and ask why you are these clingy. Do you have low self-esteem? Do you have anxious attachment issues? How were you treated when you were a kid that could have created these issues?
Another way is to work on yourself and be more attractive. When you are getting a lot of attention from women you will naturally be less clingy.
[–]whale_sports 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What type of things are you saying to them?
[–]Great at coke approachSnooHesitations4922 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Best bet is to go old testament and limit ur texting and social media use to the bare minimum. You seem to be doing well in person so don't let technology poison that. Imagine how many guys she got texting her and hitting up her socials. Texting has become a mind game, too much or too little disqualifies u, so forget that and use the ancient phone app to call her to hangout, and that is it. This way she will see u as a guy with in person charisma and won't categorize u with all the dudes in her phone.
Above all remember rule #1: Women want what they cant have. Don't give free attention and always have multiple women to talk to and ur good.
[–]Euphoric_Clock9394 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I’ll take you any day lol.
Seriously though, I do the same things but I didn’t think that was clingy?? Just expressing interest if that person showed it too, but it seems like people one day are interested and then boom not. As long as you aren’t laying it on TOO thick some gal will appreciate it, I know I would.
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[–]Thin_Protection5616 55 points56 points57 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]More-Cat-9226 13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]willgo-waggins 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Thin_Protection5616 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]I-Ate-The-Bones 4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]JearBear_3 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Suspicious-Sea-7362 13 points14 points15 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points-2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]willgo-waggins 6 points7 points8 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]willgo-waggins 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]Delicious_Ad_1853 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]nevertextgoodnight 10 points11 points12 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]betterskins 5 points6 points7 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]willgo-waggins 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]vardarac 6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]whale_sports 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Great at coke approachSnooHesitations4922 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Euphoric_Clock9394 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link