I wanted to post an interaction I had with a girl a while ago who was really flaky and how I recovered with the use of instant messaging. I think that you can really turn conversations in new directions with HOW you frame the conversation.

My goal was simply to build enough comfort and attraction to get her out with me that night. I do this through VERY playful verbal pushing and pulling. I also frame sexually and make sure she knows that I am fucking FUN! I am going to break down each section and what I did and why it was working.

This is taken from my journal directly.... She flaked two times before on me so I decided this is the be all to end all. Note she has an ex boyfriend she just broke up with about a week ago from this conversation.

[01:20] Mayson: you < me... but you > him (meaning her ex boyfriend)

[01:20] HB: .....

[01:20] Mayson: math is hard to follow huh

[01:20] HB: i forget the alligator thing in math ok

[01:20] HB: leave it alone

[01:20] HB: lol

[01:20] Mayson: i just spit water everywhere

[01:20] Mayson: thanks

[01:21] HB: hahaha your welcome

[01:22] Mayson: fuck me.

*(This starts a sexual frame that I am going to use.) *

[01:23] HB: what?

[01:23] HB: did you stub your toe again?

[01:23] HB: lol

[01:23] Mayson: no, I am all wet

  • (Again I want to bait her into a sexual response, I do this ALL the time to reverse the frame.) *

[01:26] HB: thats what she said

[01:26] Mayson: ohhhh myyyy God all you do is think about sex... naughty naughty

[01:27] Mayson: :)

[01:27] HB: oh i know

[01:27] HB: its fucking horrible

[01:27] HB: your the second person to point that out to me today

[01:27] HB: i think like a guy sometimes, i cant help it

[01:27] HB: that and sexual innuendos are funny

[01:28] HB: there is never a bad time for them

[01:28] Mayson: I totally agree.... like

[01:28] Mayson: I agree it is hard to make most people come to the understanding that sexual innuendo is an art form. I have been well endowed with a large amount of skill in this area as well. Oral skills are over looked as many people will struggle grasping the linguistic skills that roll off my tongue. I am sure you understand this concept because you have taken your lickings in life and have learned from them. Through intimate study one will find that penetrating deep understanding of oral talents can produce a very climatic finish!

[01:29] HB: oh

[01:29] HB: my

[01:29] HB: god

[01:29] HB: i

[01:29] HB: love

[01:29] HB: you!

[01:29] Mayson: see this is why we could never date!!!!!!!!

  • (False disqualifier) *

[01:29] HB: why?

[01:30] Mayson: cause I would bring you to Paris for Coffee right...

[01:30] Mayson: We would get detained in customs because you left your passport at home and this would result in you striking a customs agent, spending 2 days in jail and after heavy fines you would no long have the money for the coffee in the first place.. Way to mess up our date!! How about water at Denny's instead.

  • (playfully romantic and fun, girls and roleplay..) *

[01:30] HB: denny's is pree-ttty fancy so yes!

[01:30] HB: hahaha and yeah i hit him, but he totally had it coming!

[01:30] Mayson: wow I totally didn't ask you on a date

[01:30] Mayson: I see what you are doing there... sneeky

[01:30] HB: hahaha you see right through me

[01:30] Mayson: wink

[01:30] Mayson: look at the time

[01:30] Mayson: i should be going

  • (False time constraint here and want to see her buying temp) *

[01:30] HB: off to party?

[01:30] Mayson: no to pick you up

[01:30] HB: oh

[01:30] HB: i cant\

  • (She knows what is about to go down if I pick her up at 1:30am) *

[01:30] Mayson: cut the shit

[01:30] Mayson: time to hang

[01:31] HB: its been a rough night

[01:31] Mayson: irrelevant

[01:31] HB: is that your favorite word?

[01:31] Mayson: cut the shit

[01:31] HB: no im serious. im going to bed soon

[01:32] HB: work tomorrow

[01:32] HB: ooooh side note:

[01:32] HB: you darling are in my top friends, cause i adore you! very much so

  • (She cuts the thread and tries to continues to compliment me, I am not having it) *

[01:32] Mayson: right now you are thinking of a thousand logical reasons why you can't.. let go of logic and lets go have fun

[01:33] Mayson: HB.. you want to see me

[01:33] Mayson: I want to see you

[01:33] Mayson: its fun to color outside the lines

[01:34] HB: get your ass over here but don’t keep me up all night

[01:35] Mayson: I am not promising anything

As you can see banter and being fun goes a long way. This interaction is broken down so you can see how to go from beginning a conversation to progressing to the meet. I used IM so that I could get her out. A lot of times girls tend to be flaky and that stems from lack of comfort on her part. By spending some time on IM or better yet the phone if she will pick up then you can build some fun and playful vibes which reduce your chances of getting flaked on.

As always, AMA

Mayson http://www.nsscoaching.com