How do you get over a girl telling you she regrets it?

DogPencil · 2011-07-28T22:34:23+00:00

She just said it so she doesn't feel like a slut. don't feel bad, move on.

ConcordApes · 2011-07-28T22:24:28+00:00

This morning she told me she regrets it, and that she let me have my way with her.

That is a pretty shitty way to treat you. What if you woke up the next morning and told her that you regretted having sex with her and that it was her fault.

She is emotionally immature in that she isn't taking responsibility for her own choices.

You make amends to her? You should be asking how she's going to make amends to you.

ThrowawayPUA · 2011-07-29T01:09:41+00:00

You have encountered "buyer's remorse." This is generally considered to be caused by insufficient comfort building during the seduction. But it seems like you were well enough acquainted with her to have sufficient comfort.

Other sedditors have good comments, like that she said that so she doesn't feel like a slut. This is kind of immature. But I think puaCurveBall has the best advice.

puaCurveBall · 2011-07-28T22:06:27+00:00

Don't have one night stands?

One of the rules is she must agree to:

We have to both want this and not regret it.

However, if I had to wager a guess based on you being acquainted for awhile, I would take this to mean she doesn't want a relationship and didnt want to lead you on. If you responded to her saying she regretted it by explaining you don't want a relationship either and just want to continue having fun I'd bet this could be a regular FWB situation.

Personally, my way of handling it would be re-escalating and closing again sober. She probably will change her mind over whether she really regretted it or not.

Edit: wanted to further explain she didn't regret the actual sex, she perceived her choice as a weakness on her part, so you need to let her know she made a good decision, and that you had a good time.

2011-07-29T07:53:58+00:00

Sweet man. You are only feeling badly because she is making you feel like you used her. You didn't use her. She has sexual hang ups and it is easier for her to blame you/alcohol/emotional stuff than just accept she was horny and made a choice. You did nothing wrong, and the fact that her alleged grief over the situation bothers you is indicative of you being a good man. Don't worry. She's just not being honest with herself and needs an excuse.

daygamer · 2011-07-29T03:02:36+00:00

This is just her anti slut defense. She's trying to put all the responsibility for the sex on you, because that way it means she isn't a slut.

She's just as responsible for what happened as you are, feeling guilty and wanting to make amends makes no sense.

If a girl said this to me, I'd have a complete inability to take her seriously.

TheEllimist · 2011-07-29T05:28:23+00:00

Correct response would be "Me to I never would've thought you were that easy" followed by a laugh.... but it's a little late for that, so friendzone her use her for social proof and move on to better conquest.

noodlyjames · 2011-07-29T02:28:28+00:00

Listen. Don't try to make amends. Don't call. Don't do anything. If you do a single thing she will think of you as "the one night stand that got attached". In this case the easy way is the best way. Don't let her get in your head about it. She wanted everything just as badly as you did.

2011-07-29T05:32:34+00:00

Look her dead in the eyes, then up and down make a face of disgust.

Look away and cover your eyes and in a low voice say,

"Me too"

alexryane2 · 2011-07-29T09:50:40+00:00

Yeah you should totally feel bad about this. I mean, you obviously forced her to sleep with you, or at least heavily coerced and manipulated her into your bed. You probably got her drunk on purpose, maybe even spiked her drink!

You are a bad bad person for having sex with a woman. Women are not supposed to be slept with. Sex is immoral, wrong. She 'let' you have your way with her as a test of trust. No woman wants a man to have his way with her, ever! You failed this test, even after the first few minutes she let you continue so she could see exactly how much she couldn't trust you and you kept on failing and failing all night.

You should feel ashamed. You should apologise profusely. I don't even think that goes far enough, you should turn yourself in to the authorities and admit your rape. God, I bet she was an underage virgin too! You need to learn that as a man, sex is 100% your responsibility. You are responsible for the entire act.

leftajar · 2011-07-30T01:25:21+00:00

She's a sovereign human being who made her own choice. Regretting it is her problem, not yours.

Leave it. If you see her, be 100% cool with everything.

Title	How do you get over a girl telling you she regrets it?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	20
Comments	33
Date	July 28, 2011 10:00 PM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/j2lya/how_do_you_get_over_a_girl_telling_you_she/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-get-over-a-girl-telling-you-she-regrets.1320694 https://theredarchive.com/post/1320694

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