Three strikes you're out

bluefingerblue · 2018-10-30T23:02:11+00:00

Three strikes in a row is worthy of a block. Maybe if they were spaced out in between smash sessions. Don’t look back. This girl wasn’t that into you. You were prob her third option that last night.

boy_named_su · 2018-10-30T23:16:15+00:00

A few days later

You gotta wait a week for these Tinder THOTs

The day of the date I asked if she was still down for that night.

Don't ask, lead. Say "Tonight's gonna be fun. See you at T"

She said that she was but she wasn't sure if she was going to make it on time because of traffic and plus she will need to get ready

You should have immediately canceled. If she's not enthusiastic and prepared to follow your schedule, tell her "no problem. If you can't make it at T then let's try another day"

I already found other plans and told her let's reschedule for another time.

Good

I simply said "no worries, maybe some other time."

On a flake like that, I wouldn't mention a reschedule, just "kk"

It was only about 15 min uber ride

She should have been the one in the Uber, not you

Blocked her phone number and deleted her off all other social media

Good. I woulda done that after the first flake

RedSkeller · 2018-10-31T00:57:07+00:00

I think you handled it well, the Uber thing sounded very lame on her part but in the future you can prevent it with just having her come to you. Never go to them or chase them, make them put in the effort.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2018-10-31T04:13:01+00:00

So first, don’t over invest in little Tinderellas. Second, ” did I overreact?” sounds a lot like ”Would I have gotten pussy if I had given her one more shot?”

You didn’t overreact, because the value of Tinderellas is near zero. This would be more clear for you if you were operating from a position of abundance.

This girl basically wasted your time twice, and then got you to hop in an Uber to come over to wherever she was, so she could waste your time some more. Generally allow one reschedule, and after that shits over.

horologist2018 · 2018-10-30T22:53:15+00:00

I wouldn't have blocked her. I would have just ghosted her and let her reach out at a later date, and arrange for her to come to your door, no strings attached.

Musicgoon · 2018-10-31T01:42:04+00:00

I don't think you fucked up bro. She sounds flaky and shitty. She's a hot mess and can't manage her time. And when things go to shit she bails like a coward.

I would say that saying, "No worries", is doing her a disservice. If some chick disrespects you like this again. Let her know you don't tolerate that lack of respect after the second time. First could be a one off shit happens...

Third time ghost block and next. No explanations. You're better than to tolerate this behavior.

HurricaneHugues · 2018-10-31T04:13:31+00:00

You wasted way too much time. A week is the most you should give a tinder girl that u haven't fucked yet. After that its all a waste of time. And in being really really generous with the week here, 4-5 days shoukd be enough time to smash. If it doesnt happen, delete texts and number, and unmatch.

MattyAnon · 2018-10-31T11:33:52+00:00

I simply said "no worries, maybe some other time."

You're right to present a carefree attitude, but wrong to add "maybe some other time". This cements you as the hopeful chaser and her as the prize. Just say "no problem" or "no worries" and leave it at that. Leave it for her to worry if you want to see her or not.

Ten or twenty little frame breaks like this throughout your texting with her is enough to kill attraction.

Be more difficult about meeting up with flakey people. You gotta bounce it right back. She says she's going to be late you take it a step further: you don't reply. She cancels a date you take it a step further: no reply, invite her out next time, then YOU cancel. You can even set up a date that you know you can't make, just so you can cancel it later.

Don't be too accommodating to her, it just reeks of low value. Have more of a "take it or leave it" attitude.

Strike 3

I think she was completely playing you here.... trying to get a ride home. Probably sent the same text to ten guys, went with the first to show up.

I responded 3 hours later and simply said "no worries." Blocked her phone number and deleted her off all other social media. Did I overreact?

No, your problem is that you underreacted throughout. You've been TOO NICE from the start, and it turned her off.

On the other hand, she sounds like a fucking pain, you're better off rid.

In future: two strikes max.

onpuzzle · 2018-10-30T22:53:36+00:00

beginner_ · 2018-10-31T05:37:44+00:00

Overreacted or not doesn't matter. Just learn from this. Strike 2 is when you should have ghosted. I mean even the excuse with traffic was lame but possible. The real killer is offering no alternative. A girl with even just mild interest will do so. If she doesn't, ghost. 0 interest.

Strike 3: Complete lack of abundance entering her frame. Wouldn't even surprise me if this was a joke with her friends "let's see if I can lure him to some random place". You were on your way home. That is were you wanted to go. So either say you are done for the night or tell her to come over to your place. But don't enter her frame. you just experienced how that will end up. You wasting money (and time) on uber and looking like a fool.

ChadFromColumbus · 2018-10-31T14:32:40+00:00

Three strikes is more than enough. I still would have told her “come over and make it up to me” but nothing wrong with what you did.

_Neon_Shadow_ · 2018-10-31T05:56:40+00:00

Good job.

Charlie_007 · 2018-10-31T12:47:07+00:00

You made yourself seem a little desperate on strike three, ubering out to her And then wandering around trying to find her. Next time make her come to you, especially if she pulled all that other shit before

Blazer2100 · 2018-10-31T15:27:17+00:00

The first strike wasn’t even a strike. You made other plans. Like some others said, you probably aren’t the first option. Best to take this experience and apply it to another prospective plate.

ChadTheWaiter100 · 2018-10-31T19:31:24+00:00

Hell naw bro you killed it. Impeccable frame with the “no worries” comment. I lol’d. excellent job.

eddielovett · 2018-10-31T00:18:52+00:00

Telling her no worries and then blocking is childish, should’ve just ghosted her.

Title	Three strikes you're out
Author	Backthatpassup451
Upvotes	19
Comments	37
Date	October 30, 2018 10:41 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/9sswmb/three_strikes_youre_out/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/three-strikes-youre-out.136183 https://theredarchive.com/post/136183

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