Preface

A bit of a preface for those that check my post history. Yes, I said I was done with PUA and that's completely true but one of the most interesting and helpful things of being involved in the community is that it gives you a place to talk about other women among men. I tried r/askwomenadvice and let's just say it wasn't very fun to post in. I kind of threw r/seddit under the bus and while I don't agree with A LOT of the posts here I cant' deny that seddit has helped me. On to the fucking FR.

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Le Report

Where the fuck do I even start? I matched with a girl on Tinder a week ago her name was Kate. Our messaging on Tinder was kind of strange. I opened with

Me "You look like a hell of a lot of fun, the question is..are you down for fun?"

Her "Depends what kind of fun"

Me "Well sometimes I go salsa dancing with random girls I meet and sometimes I lick whipped cream off them."

Her "Ooo, that sounds fun."

Me "Yep, it is. I only lick whipped cream off them if the night was good"

Her "I'm sure you do"

Me "Yea, I start with the neck and work my way down."

Her "Ooo, cool"

This is kind of where the conversation derailed and I technically fucked up but honestly fuck ups are bound to happen. I just owned up to them.

Me "Yea, what do you do for fun? (Non sexual)"

Me "This is where I realize I suck at messaging women on Tinder"

Her "I dance around naked and cook pancakes to use as frisbees"

The rest of the conversation was me making fun of her cooking and I eluded again to sexual things something about whipped cream or some shit. Then she responded with another sexual message and I got her number.

Once we started texting she kept dropping what I thought were hints at sleeping/hooking up with her. Turns out they weren't so when I suggested chilling at her place she got offended and messaged me with.

Her "WOW, did you just fucking invite yourself to my place..?"

I actually agreed and said I was, her messages gave me that vibe. She kind of made fun of me because I talk in my profile that I'm really adventurous. Soon as she started to rag on how I wasn't like my profile I messaged her with.

Me "Well, there is one thing we could do. Explore an abandoned factory."

Her "I'm kind of creeped out right now."

Me "I'll call you, it's easier that way"

So I called her and explained the abandoned factory, surprisingly she was down.

We meet at a subway station close and walked to the factory. Before I continue I must add, one of my BIGGEST issues with women is fear of escalation. Today I was not going to let fear control me, I've been working the past three days on something I call "Rejection Therapy"

Basically I am forcing myself to get rejected and deal with it.

About eight minutes into the walk I decided to throw my arm around her. I was hesitant but whatever, I need to conquer this fear. I for thirty minutes with my arm sometimes around her and sometimes it wasn't around her. Once we got to the factory we started to walk around looking for points of entry, we spent a good forty-five minutes looking for an entrance. Once we found one we hesitantly entered and walked up the stairs to lead us to the roof.

While we were walking up the stairs she mentioned something about

"This place would be a great place to have sex in"

I knew exactly what she was doing and I agreed with her statement and added if you had sex here it would be one of those stories that will last a lifetime.

She agreed and we continued to walk upstairs. The whole time I was being a little flirty, I slapped her ass a few times while we were walking up the stairs. When we got to the top of the factory that's when things started to get interesting. We took a few photos and then sat down, while we were sitting down I looked her right in the eyes and said.

"I want to kiss you right now"

and went for it. This isn't really a big deal to some but I have never made out on the first date and I was excited to finally have done so. I couldn't believe I was breaking through my fear of escalation.

So, while we were kissing she pulls back with a bit of disgusted look on her face. I figured I was just a bad kisser so I asked was that bad? She sort of agreed and I said "I never said I was a good kisser" and then she started to show me how to properly kiss. I got better over the night. I was completely honest with her and told her that I'm a late bloomer and that my last girlfriend was really uptight so we didn't do much at all. I'm not really phased about telling people my flaws, no ones perfect and lying seems so fake to me so I just own up to my fuck ups/inexperience.

The rest of the date went really well, we kissed a few more times. Just as we were about to leave she says

"We should totally come up here, sleep on the roof, bring some ambient music and sleeping bags"

I replied with

"Yea! I could bring a pizza too."

She said

"YESSSSS! That's perfect, we need to do it soon though because it's going to get cold out soon."

That should be fun.

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The Takeaway

Okay, now some things to take away from this first date. I tried to condense what happened down to the necessities. A lot of FR's talk about what happened but not their mindset.

Point #1

Physical contact is really important, as soon as you meet your date you should be initiating physical contact. I put my arm around her within eight minutes, if you feel scared just remember the person that doesn't create physical contact immediately is cutting his chances of having a good night in half.

Point #2

HONESTY, seriously. Be honest with the girl tell her anything on your mind that's relevant and don't apologize for doing so. When I invited myself to her place I was being honest and when she got upset I told her my EXACT reasoning as to why I invited myself. Her texts were giving that vibe. When it came to kissing I was completely honest with her, she told me I was a bad kisser and I said okay, I want to get better and then she helped me. Later on she complimented me on my honesty.

Point #3

First dates/second dates should show your personality. I used to do a lot of coffee dates/bar dates but that's not really me, I much prefer to do something crazy and fun for my first/second date. This doesn't mean you have to be adventurous on a date, you don't. Tailor the date to show who you are, I am a very adventurous person so having the date we did was a tad crazy, fun and just the way I like it.

Point #4

Rejection! I'm not going to write about it here but I have post on the "Rejection therapy" I've been doing. I'm still working my way up to walking up to a cute girl and saying "Hey, I saw you and thought you were cute. My names Jace." but it's getting there.

Point #5

I was surprised but during the entire date I wasn't really smooth. My texting/messaging was awkward and the kissing was pretty awkward yet she wants to see me again. This sort of shows that to get a girl interested in you you don't have to be smooth you just have to be honest and show her who you are. It's not the words but the message behind the words that gets people emotionally connected with you.

Point #6

There comes a point where you have read enough material and you just need to go out into the world and apply it. Experience in my opinion is much better than theory. Theory is cool but if you can't apply it then why read about it? Reading more theory won't get you better with women. Experience will. Take action now, start small if you have to. Go up to a random girl and ask for the time or directions. Once you feel comfortable with that do something a little more risky. Keep working your way up and eventually you will become the fearless badass you are.

Point #7

Listen to music that puts you into action. One of my favorite music genres is trance but what I've noticed is when I listen to trance I just want to zone out and let the music take me on a trip, not the greatest mindset for someone that wants to become more action orientated. Lately however I have been listening to a nu-metal band called Spineshank. When I listen to Spineshank I want to fuck shit up, become fearless, become active and own the world. Ever since I started listening to more upbeat and aggressive music I've been more active and less passive. It's just a thought. ____________________________________________________________________________________________

Conclusion

That's all I got, there may be more points but I can't think of anything right now. As far as Tinder goes, no. I won't show my profile or my pictures. The best I can say is have your Tinder congruent to who you are, my photos and bio reflects exactly the type of person I am. I have no selfies and my pictures are of me doing things I enjoy. Like volleyball, adventure and raves. As far as first messages go I usually open with whatever is on my mind. I get around a 90% response rate and probably 11% of my matches become numbers and 2% become dates.

Sorry if my writing is shitty, I'm really tired and I'm going out in three minutes. Later I may polish up the post.

Goodluck out there fellas!

Edit: Messed about with the formating, it should read slightly better now.