I am being too picky? Attractiveness and Personality.

Conotocaurious85 · 2016-07-25T02:41:59+00:00

This dude is asking the real questions here.... Honestly I'm uncomfortable with some conclusions that I have reached, and I'm not entirely sure why... Examples:

I find values* that I legitimatly admire in girls that are less attractive than the girls I usually go for. When I talk to them I think to myself: "Am I so fucking shallow that her hotness is making me miss out on a legitimate connection?"

The sort of hot girl I usally select baffles me, because they aren't people I can wholesomely respect. I find mysfel very attracted to her (usually abundant) feminine-ness, that more often than not comes packaged with increased domestic skills, like she offers to cook for me or give me back rubs, and in general just leans one me A LOT. However, this "leaning on me" makes me lose so much respect for her. This overarching theme of "helpless-ness" without me is something that I honestly endure because I love how it feels when other men look at me green with envy; mostly because the girls is just way hotter than I am (physically at least). With these girls I honestly can say that I don't have a legitimately deep connecton, I "work them" like 80% of the time. Find myself seeing everything as a shit test and consitently putting in time and effort to maintain attraction and shit. This. Is. Draining.

And yeah, eventually they will get older and lose their attractiveness... what then, start over with a younger one?

Honestly I don't have the answer I'm just ranting because I feel OPs struggle, it hits very much close to home... I kind of feel like not being able to land a women at all was an easier problem to solve than this...

*:(I work with math so things like strong analytical thinking skills and coherent, well thought out moral/spiritual standings are good examples of things I value over other things)

sefmz · 2016-07-25T04:35:27+00:00

[deleted]

What is this?

Big_TX · 2016-07-25T04:45:30+00:00

Just do what you want to do. It doesn't matter. You don't have to live your life by pimp metrics. If you like the a girl you like her. If you want to sleep her then you do. If you honestly want a hotter girl then that's what you want.

TheXXL · 2016-07-25T12:30:12+00:00

You should think about why you prefer looks over personality. It might be some experience in your childhood, the way you have been raised, very often it is the need to have something more beautiful to show the world how much value you have, or it is based on a past lifestyle where scarcity was the dominant factor, so you now feel the need to have the best looking woman to prove yourself you are worth it after all.

You already see that there are so many possible explanations, and only if you find out for yourself what makes you feel this way, you are able to change it. On the other hand with enough experience you will one day come to a conclusion, and then you might change your view on the matter.

IWriteForGroupies · 2016-07-25T16:44:00+00:00

The good old nature vs nurture, man vs beast, brawn vs brain. I honestly say that some people are more hormonal and instinct than they are actually brains. I believe once a person learns to control their hormones they are able to find a balance and make proper decisions when it comes to women. People change and this is normal. The hard part is understanding the changes. Relationships are complicated things that most people are not properly educated on. I, as a person, believe that people should educate themselves on all types of relationships.

Most people do not put thought into relationships. Ask yourself these questions?

What is family? What is friendship? What is dating? What is having a boyfriend/girlfriend? What is an open relationship? What is marriage? What is divorce? When should a person have kids? (boyfriend/girlfriend, dating, marriage, age range)

There is so much that most people never think of. Most people get with that hot girl and then everything changes.

user-and-abuser · 2016-07-25T01:32:51+00:00

values is what you want the rest comes after that

Title	I am being too picky? Attractiveness and Personality.
Author	breakingthehabits
Upvotes	7
Comments	13
Date	July 25, 2016 12:24 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/4ufw0t/i_am_being_too_picky_attractiveness_and/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-am-being-too-picky-attractiveness-and.1410023 https://theredarchive.com/post/1410023

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