I am confident and have been told I'm attractive many times, but can never seem to get romantic interest going with women. Don't know what I'm doing wrong

Ironchar · 2016-09-30T01:01:37+00:00

You probably play it safe too much. Sometimes you gotta show you desire someone.

mapleridge_ · 2016-09-30T03:43:57+00:00

Do you know what you lack? Physical escalation. Go to the side bar and search on the good post about physical escalation, kino, etc... In no time you will achieve what you want.

Bobwithak · 2016-09-30T01:48:45+00:00

What dubmau said be okay with being turned down. The tried and true advice is be direct with your intentions. If you want to take her on a date then tell her. If you think she is attractive tell her. If you want to have sex...well it's actually surprisingly effective to be super confident and tell her what you want to do to her. Being direct will cut down on all things that you don't want.

witha_ph · 2016-09-30T09:30:46+00:00

There are two layers of communication. What you are actually saying, and the non-verbal stuff. The posture, the body language, touching etc etc. The non-spoken stuff is how most women indicate interest. This is where most of the escalation and flirting really happens. That's how you can show you want sex, but not SAY you want sex.

Try to imagine there two conversations are happening when you speak to a girl. That's the best way to think of it I believe. Once you can understand the other conversation you can see who is interested. Who you should spend more time talking too. Who you should ESCALATE on.

This is where we, as guys, fall over, especially when we are starting out. We just can't read this stuff very well.

Franko2922 · 2016-09-30T15:05:00+00:00

From reading your post, it seems obvious that you yourself know what you are lacking and u are just seeking confirmation from others. What you are lacking is failing to take initiative to escalate things - dont expect things to "naturally" escalate - it doesnt work that way

How do you escalate things into something beyond friendship? Answer is flirting + physical contact. Giving compliments + physical contact - both shows that you are SEXUALLY interested in her. Whenever tension reaches a high state - try to ease the tension by teasing her / tell a joke - laughter releases stress and tension. If she is playing along then she is interested in you, thats when u go for the kill, tell her its really noisy here, lets go to a quiet place. From there on its obvious - once again take the initiative - ladies hate to make the decision - you make the decision for them - ladies never decide they want to sleep with you - what you are doing is just making them open to that idea - ultimately u have to make the decision for them that they will want to sleep with you.

Your post gives me the impression that you seem to have a slight disdain for pick up artist tricks because it seems "cheap" and "manipulative". Well my response to that is maybe you are putting woman too high up on a pedestal, woman are human beings too, treat them like normal human rather than some holy goddess object and you will get lots of romantic interests in no time.

I do understand your pain though. In an ideal world, romantic relationships starts from pure innocent love which would then over a period of time naturally and slowly escalate into sexual relationship. Sadly, you will learn very fast that those mostly only happens in movies - for such relationship to occur in real life... well it can happen if you are not picky, but if you are looking for a physically attractive girl then its always sex first from my experience.

evilgenivs · 2016-09-30T01:48:17+00:00

I thought I was reading a post by myself until "platonic conversation and show sexual intent".

I don't have trouble with said problem and somehow I'm doing things "right" but can't get more than just kissing. There will never be a date, or sex that night.

Overnight_Delivery · 2016-09-30T16:37:58+00:00

"do you want to have sex?" right out of the blue. I don't want to come across as creepy.

You don't want to come off as creepy yet you don't actually know if this would come off as creepy. See how this is fundamentally stopping you from everything? Also you are worried women can't handle it. If you are a guy who is worried about being creepy I can guarantee you 100% whatever you think would be too much for even the most innocent of girls she's experienced 10 times "worse" probably multiple times from other guys and at least a few times it's worked.

CHRISTINESAGIRLSNAME · 2016-09-30T02:25:07+00:00

Hey.

It's what these other guys are saying. You have to tell these girls you want to fuck them, not with your mouth but with your body. Not fuck them with your body, fuck them with your dick only (hands too), but show them with your body.

It almost always involves parties at friends houses, where there are many women who I may know slightly or are friends of friends, and I often see them looking my way like they are interested.

Okay this is a perfect place to start. So, when you catch her eye looking at you walk up to her. If you already know her, point at something and say "man that's crazy" or something generic bonus if you can be funny but the point is to start a conversation. If you don't know her introduce yourself.

You're having fun and you love parties because they are fun. So you say to her hey, lets _____. I liked to say beer pong, cuz i was good at that, but you could say take a shot, play kings cup, smoke a cigarette if you see she's a smoker, whatever.

Then when you are doing whatever you decide to ask her to do, touch her. Not like a crazy amount where it's weird but don't be shy. Also look at her like you wanna eat her face. If she seems disinterested or is just boring, move on. You love parties and don't wanna waste time at the party if she is a downer. You could always come back to her.

My advice is to make the parties you go to as fun as you possibly can. When I go out I try to make sure it is the best night of my life every time. And my friends lives too! Try and make sure you have fun and your crew has fun and don't be scared to let the girls no that you would sure love to fuck em haha! :)

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