Hooking up is the easiest thing in the world but trying to hold a relationship is so hard.

Mach2Machiavellian · 2018-04-30T03:34:30+00:00

It’s the stuff about envisioning (and discussing) a future with these girls that’s most likely causing them to run away. So stop that and just embrace the present with them. In time, if you just enjoy each other without bringing up future plans, most girls will start naturally seeing you as their boyfriend and possibly more.

33dst · 2018-04-30T03:34:20+00:00

I'm the exact same way. It ended up in a breakup, pretty much exactly like yours. It's just your brain playing tricks on you, and if you're like me, you get attached way too easily if it's not a one night stand. You need to take a step back and address that. Admitting it's a problem is the first step.

Look up videos about how to eliminate oneitis, watch Corey Wayne and people like that on youtube. Next time you're seeing a girl you like a lot, make sure you take a step back every once in awhile and remember to take it slow.

Alex25pf · 2018-04-30T13:05:32+00:00

Girls will generally like a guy who looks independent, mentally strong and confident, what you call "narcissistic". This is probably what you're like when you're in the flirting/hookup phase, which is likely the reason you're successful.

Girls will generally not like a guy who acts clingy, needy, sees her as some sort of goddess and demonstrates way too much attachment.

It's hard because when you fall for a girl you do see her as a goddess and naturally get attached to her, but if you show her this she'll run away.

Girls like your "narcissistic" version more, you've seen it over and over right? So next time you find THAT girl just make sure you don't stray away too much from this version, take your time before you start showing any signs that you've fallen for her, even if you're dying to tell her all these emotional things.

Source:

When I met my ex girlfriend the first time, I was literally in love after talking to her for 10 mins. I knew this was the girl I wanted a relationship with. She didn't even like me, didn't even need me, wasn't even looking for a partner.

I knew if I showed her all my feelings she'd run away, and I also knew I'm very confident with "seducing" a girl.

What I did was just swallow all of these sappy feelings I had and try my hardest to treat her as if she were a Tinder match/hookup potential, for as long as I could.

It was hard as fuck, but it worked.

Since the moment I talked to her for the first time, I cut all contact with all my previous fuckbuddies/deleted Tinder. I obviously didn't show this to her.

After about a month of going out, hooking up, and having sex a couple of times, I started slowly showing my true feelings for her.

We ended up being happily in love and together for a long time.

LingeringGnome · 2018-04-30T20:10:04+00:00

I'll tell you *exactly* why this is happening.

You're not behaving in an emotionally-centered way (not providing space, over-contact on the phone, etc).

Fit women have male orbiters. In early courtship, a 9 or 10 will usually have a guy she's sometimes fucking, a couple guys she's friend-zoned, an ex-bf, a guy she wants to fuck, a guy who's chasing her.

Why does she do this? It's not on purpose. What she's doing is trying guys out. When she finds a man who is confident, dominant, fun, playful, fit, and good in bed, she will naturally fade out the orbiters from her life, and ask you for exclusivity.

If you aren't ticking several of those boxes, you have NO CHANCE of getting into a relationship wit ha 9/10.

Solutions:

Hit the fucking gym. Put on muscle.
Take a sticky note and write this on it: Am I giving this woman space? Am I texting too much? Does this text serve a purpose? Am I sending negative emotions to this woman? TAPE IT to your PHONE. This will train you to be more emotionally-centered in your communications with women.
Read books on how to give orgasms. Read books in general, less TV. Increases vocabulary and awareness

DaveyOneBite · 2018-04-30T04:56:52+00:00

I suspect you're being too open/transparent with them. When a woman is attracted to you and she only knows a little bit about you she fills in the gaps with her imagination which increases her attraction.

If you are too open too fast then the realities that replace these imagination gaps are usually less exciting and she sees you in a different light and thinks she mis judged you.

Give her enough to stay interested but don't be an open book. At least not all at once or right away.

Aeon199 · 2018-04-30T04:46:15+00:00

How is hooking up so easy?

Do you have high social status and money? 6'2" with big arms naturally? That's why it's easy, if you have those things.

Saying it's easy is a disservice to every guy who has to play the game being 5'9" with weak arms that gyming don't improve; and no social status as well.

I'm interested why you think it's easy, bro. WTF. It's impossible, to be honest.

Title	Hooking up is the easiest thing in the world but trying to hold a relationship is so hard.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	19
Date	April 30, 2018 3:16 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/8fwkdg/hooking_up_is_the_easiest_thing_in_the_world_but/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/hooking-up-is-the-easiest-thing-in-the-world-but.1445750 https://theredarchive.com/post/1445750

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