I feel shit about myself

JUST_WANTTOBEHAPPY · 2019-08-01T14:48:23+00:00

Facing a breakup and getting screwed over, is one of the most terrible feeling ever. You're normal to feel like shit. Take time to grief for your relationship lost even if she's the one who cheat and broke your heart. In case you haven't done it delete everything about her and block her on all social media platform.

You want to change thousand of things about yourself. But take it one day a time. You're already hitting the gym so that's great. public speaking is also good, trust me the story telling ability and tonality control you learn from there will help massively when seducing woman. But don't do it for woman, do it for yourself.

If there's one advice I would give you right now is stop hating yourself. You are beating yourself way too much. I been there, we all been there. Self doubt after being cheated on or screwed over is TERRIBLE.

You need time to let the healing process to do it's job, so block her, be with people who cares for you, work on your goals, the thing you have been putting off for years now? Time to get back on it. You have to reconnect with yourself who you are as an individual. I'm sure you have amazing qualities that you can offer to people around you.

You're invalidating yourself. Stop it, cut that shit out.

Unpopular opinion also try avoid sleeping around for the first few weeks. I disagree notion best way to get over someone is to get under someone, when you're fresh from the wound last thing you want to come across your mind is "she's not as good as my ex". So grief, embrace the pain. Only when you're in a better position emotionally, you may consider dating again.

And you will be. You share an amazing experience with this person, she's part of an important piece in your life. But here's the truth, she cheated. As much as an amazing person or 9's she is, she cheated.

Cut her out of your life, and fucking work on yourself. Get shredded, get good at public speaking, get more charismatic, offer help to people around you, do voluntary work, invest in your future, start dating 9s/10s again. Funnily Once she see you rocking life and doing amazing without her. She will reach out.

In case if she ever contact you, DON'T EVER fucking get back with her.

In seduction community, one of the golden rule we preach is this. ABUNDANCE MENTALITY. never get back with a leftover food in the oven, and that given you stomach ache. REMEMBER there is always a better pussy around the corner. And to get the better pussy first you have to become a better version of yourself first. And let me tell you, breakup is always another start of a beautiful chapter in your life.

However for now, just take care of yourself, you're in a very vulnerable chapter of your life. Time heals all wound, You will become back the cheerful easy going person you see yourself as, only this time, a better version of yourself. I wish you the best.

smoothmax · 2019-08-01T14:28:18+00:00

Practice having fun conversations with everyone in your office not just the women you're attracted to.

At first, deliberately pick the ugliest people to chat up. Look them in the eye and appreciate them and what they're saying. Find the beauty in their souls and yes, in their faces and eyes. You can do this even in 10 second conversations about the weather.

I haven't seen your face but i'm sure it's fine. There are lots of plain looking but successful PUAs out there. I watch their daygame infields all the time.

Appreciate other people's beauty first and you won't worry any more about your own looks.

Down and dirty sexual attraction has a lot less to do with people's perception of facial beauty than you think. Body perception yes ... but you're working on that. Eye contact and smell are also huge.

Vistian · 2019-08-01T17:47:19+00:00

Hey, man. I feel you. I'm 38 years old and I've been in similar situations in my past and actively gird myself to avoid them in the future. How? I personally feel that a solid philosophical framework is the foundation of flourishing and happiness. I have found great comfort in hearing and applying the teachings of the late Stoic philosophers, Epictetus, Marcu Aurelius, and Seneca. Basically, the only thing that you can control in this life is how you respond to things and, while that's an easy enough concept to understand, for me, it's taken more than half a decade to even begin to see a smidge of progress in actually internalizing it. But, that's where the work lies; in focusing on what I actually control and letting that which I do not truly slide.

I'm glad you're working out. Your corporeal form is indelibly tied to your mental health and sense of well-being. You don't have to be a jacked bro, but strive to get stronger and put on some muscle. People will notice, it will boost your self-confidence, and both of those things will feed off one another.

Have a goal/purpose for your life. That sounds grand and cliche-ic, but I've found it to be true. Strive to do something meaningful with your life that goes beyond yourself. That will again, make what you do about what you control, and not about what other people can do for or to you. When you have your priorities straight, a lot of things become clearer and simpler (though nothing is "clear and simpler"; things just get more so).

Do not make chasing women or "the one" the priority of your life. People will come in and out of your life and the best thing you can do is treat each person with kindness and human respect without placing them on some pedestal. Have the power to walk away from something that is not of your value system. If you cannot, you are, by definition, enslaved to that object and all sorts of trouble starts from there.

With that, try to find people who have similar values that you do and commune with them. The quantity may not be much, but it's the quality that counts. Share your time with people who deserve your presence and make your presence something worth deserving.

Be the best human being that you can possibly be. Aim for the highest things. Help those do the same.

I wish you all the best. <3

MisterRight1 · 2019-08-01T14:47:56+00:00

One thing that helped me when I was feeling bad about myself...

step 1: Look yourself in the eye in the mirror

step 2: Say "I love you" and mean it

step 3: repeat once a day for 30 days

You will be amazed by how much your mood improves.

amg-rx7 · 2019-08-01T17:32:13+00:00

Sounds like you are going through a bit of depression. It happens. Seeing a counselor / psychologist helped me in similar situations. Good luck.

bemore_ · 2019-08-01T19:04:52+00:00

You're not in touch with yourself anymore. I don't know you so don't know how you can find yourself again. I can suggest some things. You're gonna have to let go of some things and find meaning again. For example stop going to gym for a week and in that time do something nice for yourself while searching for why you like going to gym and what your personal goals are. Start a 30 day positivity habit, try getting out in nature. Think about self care right now, what all of this stuff you're doing actually means to you, what needs to go, what needs to stay anf where you're going

LastChanceProbably · 2019-08-01T21:36:31+00:00

You are enough, you don't need to go to the gym. You're a satisfactory bf or sexual partner for at least some women out there, go and find them.

hilhil83 · 2019-08-03T06:37:33+00:00

youre hurt, and youre taking yor anger and pain ot on yourself by hating yor looks.

this is what chicks do when dudes use them too. it sucks. dont fall into it.

advice:

take time to sink into your feelings, and just notice and name them-- dont get swallowed by them.
do what you need to do to grieve the good parts of what you had but be mindful of the things that youdidnt like and what youd love to have differently in future relationships
self care! gym but also eat right, socialize with your friends, make new memories and go to different areas to start a new chapter for yourself as you recalibrate your life. catch up with old frineds and family and do those things you always wanted to do but didnt have time for.
its ok to see a therapist for a few sessions too if you need to get stuff off your chest.
when your more emotinally settled, maybe start dating if your strong enought to go through that process.

xoxo best wishes

Title	I feel shit about myself
Author	LastChanceProbably
Upvotes	17
Comments	18
Date	August 1, 2019 1:08 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/cko5q1/i_feel_shit_about_myself/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-feel-shit-about-myself.1475080 https://theredarchive.com/post/1475080

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